


Tango In The Night

by 994527



Category: MotoGP RPF, Motorcycling RPF, Sports RPF
Genre: All the classic things you'd expect, Angst, F/M, Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-03
Updated: 2016-06-11
Packaged: 2018-03-05 04:17:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 60
Words: 121,499
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3105374
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/994527/pseuds/994527
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Marc really shouldn't be seen in a pole dancing club. Marc really shouldn't go to a pole dancing club. But sometimes, you have a few too many...and you end up in a pole dancing club.</p><p>  <i>“If you love two people at the same time, choose the second. Because if you really loved the first one, you wouldn’t have fallen for the second.”</i></p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Starting from Pole

**Author's Note:**

> It's the next logical step, right? ;) A Marc/OFC...although honestly it really should be a Dani/OFC except that I can't imagine how that would work, yet, except cuddles and log fires, so...Marc/OFC it is. ;)
> 
> I think perspectives etc may change on this. I started in first person, we'll see how it goes!
> 
> Please let me know any thoughts/comments etc...It makes such a difference :) ♥
> 
> I hope you enjoy it!
> 
> Notes if you never read before: _italics_ are usually thoughts, and name: xxxx are texts :)

“You’ll have a good time.”

“And if anyone sees…”

“If anyone in there wants to tell people, I’d be surprised. Although it’s really not a big deal. It’s 120 euros to even get in. It’s not 1988 anymore, ok? It’s not strippers and cocaine or anything. They’re basically athletes.”

“You’re really selling it.”

“Pff. But that’s the point…no one’s selling it. It’s not a brothel.”

“I’m going to regret this tomorrow.”

“I think we have a yes!”

_I think I’ve had too much to drink._

*

“Ready?”

“Yes.”

“Sure?”

“Limberrrrrr.”

“Ok. Good. Big crowd tonight, so just enjoy it.”

“I will.”

*

 _Oh God I regret this._ More sober, more nervous, and a whole lot closer to the stage than intended, Marc was not enjoying himself. Although it wasn’t like he’d imagined once he was inside, it was still a long, long way from an event in a suit with a few smiling pictures and then home to his warm, family surrounded bed. Or even far from a few drinks and a nice chat with a nice girl with a nice cocktail followed by hotel with a warm bed. _Maybe if I just…_

But then the music started, and _she_ walked out, and he felt someone bump his shoulder slightly, and his mouth dropped all the way to the floor.

_Oh My God._

*

“I think he definitely enjoyed himself. Jeje.”

“Seems that way. And I don’t know if she knew who-“

“Oh I think she knew. She doesn’t usually do…well, _that._ ”

“Guys…” Marc raised his eyebrows and bumped shoulders with them. “I can still hear you.”

“And here’s us thinking you’d gone deaf and dumb…”

“Just not blind.”

“Jeje, no. Obviously not blind…”

“Ok. Seriously…” The Honda rider blushed to himself and let out a whoosh of breath. “Leave me alone. You made me go in there…not my fault if I was obviously her favourite…”

“Oooh so you did notice-“

“Yes I noticed and I would like to go home now and try and pretend I’ll ever fall in love with anyone else. And _do not_ tell Emilio that we went there.”

They exchange looks as they get in the taxi, aware of the blushingly-aware but somehow distantly thoughtful look on Marc’s face, and watch him watch the traffic in silence all the way back to the hotel, before he disappears off alone on the road back home, still, maybe slightly, blushing. 

*

“I know I said you should focus on a few members of the audience to co-“

“I know. Sorry, maybe a bit too much focusing…” I winked at her and nodded. “But do you know who that was?”

“Honestly I didn’t really look, I was watching you.”

“Aww, thanks babe.” I pulled her in to kiss her cheek and gave her a squeeze. “I think you’ll know who I mean when I say it…”

“You mean someone famous…”

“Yup.” I grinned and held up the hastily googled picture on my phone. “Ring any bells?”

“MotoGP guy.”

“Aww so you do listen sometimes…” I ducked out the way of the smack and grinned again, pulling my coat on and checking the excessive make up was now toned down enough to let me get public transport in peace. _All good._ “Marc. Marquez. Campeón del mundooo…”

“Wow. Ok…maybe I should advertise-“

“No.” I wagged my finger and shook my head. “I know you're joking but really, really don’t. Tell anyone. I don’t think anyone else had a clue and that’s not fair-“

“Ok, ok! Fine. Sorry…I didn’t realise he was so important to you…”

I narrowed my eyes at the smirk and gave her the finger on the way out the door. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Yeah, love you too…”

 _“Ciaooo!”_ I shivered into the cold and immediately pulled my hair out of the ponytail, genuinely too cold for exposed ears, and pulled out my phone.

Mila: On my way back, babe. Please tell me you remembered to go shopping

Antoni: Sorry…

Mila: Right, ok. See you a bit later then…

Antoni: Sorry again 

Mila: You always are, babe.

Antoni: I’ll pay for it?

Mila: I can pay for it thanks

Mila: See you in a bit

*

 _Ok, I’m going to have to get up._ He rubbed his hands over his face and sighed, light switch back on, throwing the covers back enough to sit on the edge of the bed and groan slightly. _Pole dancer. Beautiful pole dancer. Why. Why did we have to see a pole dancer an hour before I’m supposed to sleep._

Alex: You’re awake

Marc: Stalker

Alex: Light’s on

Marc: Stalker

Alex: Why are you awake?

Marc: Because I’m still high on ‘Camila Deville’

Alex: Oh you didn’t actually go…

Marc: Yup :/

Alex: Ok…honestly, was it good or trashy?

Marc: Fucking amazing

Alex: Really?!

Marc: Yes! Although I could hardly look

Alex: ?

Marc: Too many things to see and too few eyes

Alex: Jajajajajajajaja

Marc: If you’re awake do you want a drink?

Alex: Kitchen in 5 :) 

Marc: Please wear clothes this time

Alex: I DIDN’T KNOW YOU WERE HOME


	2. bailadoramila liked marcmarquez93's photo

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for first reactions! I hope you like??? Pleasseeee feedback is king!
> 
> May change Ch1 to third person, may keep switching ... ♥

Marc dreamt about pole dancing. More specifically, about _her_ pole dancing. And after going through it with Alex in the kitchen with both sets of eyes wider than most situations they could remember, ostensibly to try and say it so he didn’t have to think it, he’d still not freed the thought. And it had been 9 days.

 _9 days and all I remember is the one moment where you put that shoe on my chest and…_ He took a deep breath and shook his head. _And looked me in the eye, and I swear, I swear you skipped a beat, just a bit. A tiny bit. Like I did._

*

“Toni…?”

“Hmm?”

“Are you cooking tonight?”

“Oh shit, yeah. Sorry.” He got up from the sofa and stretched, admittedly making her lick her lips slightly, before wandering into the kitchen area and putting his hands on his hips. “Right…”

“What are you making?”

“Not sure yet.”

 _Right._ “We have stuff for lasagne…”

“Nah. Don’t fancy that. Steak.”

“Steak…”

“Yeah. I’ll be back in a few minutes, ok?”

“Ok.” _By which you mean 20. And which you could have done 20 hours ago._ “See you in a bit then…”

*

Marc: I found her

Alex: What?

Marc: On Instagram

Alex: Who?!

Marc: The pole dancer

Alex: Ohhhh. Don’t follow her, everyone can see

Marc: I know :P but she’s amazing, it shouldn’t matter. It’s a sport too basically

Marc: plus she does other stuff like tango and salsa

Marc: WATCH THE SALSA COMPETITION VIDEO

Alex: Tell that to Emilio…

Alex: And WOW

Marc: Yeah I know :/ and YEAH I KNOW ;)

Alex: You know what you could do, because I thought about this yesterday because I miss your stupid photos

Marc: What?

Alex: Make another account. BE FUCKING CAREFUL you don’t get mixed up, but make another one without your face on it that’s private

Alex: And we can get some too, and actually use it how we’re meant to ;)

Marc: Baby brother I love you

Marc: Name?

Alex: Not ‘marcmarquezpersonal’ :P

Marc: Pfff. 

Marc: Something segre, reminds me of Rufea

Marc: marcsegre17

Marc: me plus river plus birthday

Marc: Find me

Alex: Give me chance, I’m eating

Marc: Oh sorry. I miss mum’s food :/ I like my new house but my cooker hates me

Alex: Well you have it up there too, idiot. Freezer

Marc: Were you always this rude?

Alex: Yes

Alex: Right ok done, I’m alexsegre12

Alex: I miss 12 :/

Marc: I miss 12, he was more respectful of his older brother

Alex: pffff right spread the word to the good people :)

Marc: Whatsapp

Alex: Good idea :)

*

bailadoramila: Rehearsals today! :) #ILoveMyJob 

*

_alexsegre12, titomeria and 2 others followed bailadoramila_

Marc: it was meant to be undercover

Alex: we saw you do it and we followed ;) #elbowdown

Alex: She is beautiful. Did you watch the video from November?

Marc: Nooo… ;) [14 times]

Alex: Jajjaa. Who else shall I follow?

Marc: This is the beauty…ANYONE YOU WANT ;) :D

Alex: I think my phone bill will go up :D :D

*

_marcsegre17 started following you._

_Lleida/Andorra … Motos, Football, Music. Gas al fondo.. ;)_

_And dancing? I’m sure as an art form, not a form of half dressed women._ She clicked on the other few new people, all weirdly a bit similar, and then went back to him. _Oh private, you are annoying. Especially when you look that good from behind._

*

bailadoramila: Amazing sunrise today, #uptooearly or #tobedtoolate ? ;) have an amazing day everyone, thank you so much for the messages…went to the doctor last night and will be fine in a couple of days…until then I’m a nightmare for @toniobejarano ;) 

toniobejarano: don’t worry my love, I don’t mind! #nurse

marciacruz: hope you feel better!

bbbelgrande: cute you guys ♥

marcsegre17: I hope you feel better :)

samosahermoza: feel better!! 

 

*

Alex: Ooh first contact

Marc: Fuck off

Marc: first contact was eye contact and burning alive ;)

Alex: Hmmm :P

 

*

Marc: It got worse

Alex: ?

Marc: I took a girl home last night

Alex: Right...?

Marc: I can't get Mila out my head

Marc: May have said the wrong name

Alex: Ouchhhh

Marc: Don't think she cared. She went before I got up

Alex: Ouccchhh

Marc: Yeah :/ seriously *banging head on the wall*

*

_bailadoramila liked marcmarquez93’s photo_

“ALEX. ALEX!”

“It’ll be ready in a second-“

“Not coffee, not coffee. Mila!”

“Are you drunk?”

“NO! THE DANCER LIKED MY PHOTO.”

“You let her-“

“No, no a proper marcmarquez93 one! From MX!”

“Oooh!”

Marc grinned at his brother as he came back in the room and held up the phone. “I know!”

“Does this mean she knew who you were-“

“Maybe…”

“And maybe that’s why she-“

“No, it wasn’t just that. Honestly…” He narrowed his eyes slightly at the expression on Alex’s face and shook his head. “Give me some credit…”

“Hmm…”

“Says you…”

“I’m sure she just lost my number.”

“Yeah. Sure.”

“Don’t be mean. And here.” The younger brother passed him the cup and slouched down on the opposite sofa, up to visit the new Andorra house and have a night of playstation. Or, as it turned out, online stalking.

“Thanks. And she posted another photo. Tango rehearsal for something…”

“Have you been like this all week?”

“Hmm…maybe a bit?” He grinned and then looked back at the screen, taking a careful sip from the cup. “Why didn’t I check who she follows before?”

“Because you were trying to be less stalker-ish?”

“Nope. She follows me, you, tito, Jorge, Vale, Alvaro and the Espargaros. And Maverick Viñales. Rafa. Laia Sanz. Oooh and Dani…Shakira. Loads of other dancers…”

“You know I think she has a boyfriend…the guy who commented on-”

“Shhh-“

“You can’t just ignore it.”

“Yeah I can. I’m not exactly sending her flowers and stuff-“

“I just think you need to decide whether you waste your career distracted by a phantom dancer or actually act on it.”

“No, it’s fine. No harm in looking…”

“Except for the emails you haven’t answered and the Qatar packing you haven’t done because you’re obsessing over the possibility…”

“Shhh.” The older brother smiled at him through a fake glare and then took a deep breath. _Fine._ “Alright. We’re staying nearer the airport tomorrow night, yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“She’s dancing at 9 o’clock. Not pole dancing. In El Raval. If you and Tito come-“

“Marc, she has a boyfriend.”

“Ok you know what? Maybe she does. Is Brad Pitt married to Jennifer Aniston?”

“No but-“

“I’m not saying I’m going to do anything bad, I just…if I meet her, properly, and we hate each other…then ok.”

“You’re actually serious.”

“I’m always serious…”

“It’s a bad idea.”

“Like pushing Miller wide on a drying track?”

“Marc?!”

“I’m just saying, sometimes you do what’s best for you, not what’s best for your rivals. Right?”

“So you admit you’re making yourself a rival-“

“Not like that, I just-“

“She might be a complete bitch.”

“Do you get that feeling? From this?” He held up the phone again, profile full of smiles and friends and very, very nice words, and made a sort of _exactly_ face. “Yeah. So…at least let’s go and watch. Pleeaassseeeee…?”

 _Sometimes I wish I was an only child._ “But it’s not pole-“

“No, tango.”

“And if we’re seen it’s not-“

“Emilio would say its fine.” _I’m winning._ “Pleaseee...??”

Alex sighed and slouched back on the sofa to stare at the ceiling. “Fine. But I play as FCB for a month-“

“A month?!”

“Take it or leave-“

“FINE.” He smiled to himself and starting typing again. “I will buy tickets.” _And not have any cleaner dreams than last night._ “Thank you…”


	3. Peligro

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The title is 'Danger' and also a tango song by Gotan Project...first chapter I think I ever wrote around a song, and if you want to listen along ;) it's here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EsYVPlFj6_s
> 
> The lyrics I was going to translate in there but it ruins the flow a bit, so they're at the end. :)
> 
> And Malu, I hope it's ok how I formatted it aka _exactly_ like you...there's no other sensible way to split it except putting these bits on the right! :/ ♥
> 
> I hope you all enjoy! Thank you and please let me know, good and bad :)

_No deberían caer_

_pero caen en la tentación_

_This shouldn’t be happening._ She’s aware of that, aware of the ringing argument still echoing in her ears, but then Marc’s teeth nip her lip, hand now pinching the zipper of the dress, pulling it down and making her back shiver, fingers exploring the skin underneath, and she can’t care. She can’t care about anything other than the hot breath on her neck as his mouth moves lower, skin humming under the touch, his leg wedged between hers, pressure increasing , pushed against the wall and moaning as his fingers pull the dress down and let it fall to the floor. _This shouldn’t be happening._

_Un torbellino_

_de locura, de ardor y deseo_

Alex realises the problem a couple of seconds after his brother. They’ve been sat there a while, watching an admittedly good show, waiting for _her_. She is the final dancer of the night, with her partner, and _that_ is the problem, because her dance partner is, Alex thinks he knows and has it confirmed by Marc’s clenched jaw sat next to him, also her _partner_. Antoni, his name seems to be. And the tango, although danced with passion throughout the rest of the night, didn’t look quite as it should until them, and then descends further and further to something mesmerizing that captures him and his burningly jealous brother sat next to him. There is passion, and it’s danced well, but there’s something else there that Alex wants to explain through knowing that the couple is a couple, but that’s not enough. It’s somehow rough and violent, genuine flashes of shock passing between them at the intensity, snarled lips and fingernails catching in the fabric of his suit, a perfectly choreographed continuation, he realizes, of a _big_ argument. And as it gets to the end, she pushes him, as she’s obviously supposed to, but with enough force for it to go beyond show and into reality, leaving him alone in the center of the stage, fists clenched, before the light drops and the crowd starts to clap. _Shit._

_Si aumenta el peligro_

_aumenta la excitación_

“I think that’s a bad idea.”

“They already know we’re here. They already invited us backstage.”

“Which is a bad idea.”

“She probably won’t even be there, Alex. I think she’ll be long gone, stomping home in the rain.”

“And if not?”

“What? If not, I get to meet her.”

Alex sighs, aware he’s not going to win this, and follows. _Yeah, exactly._

_La lluvia golpea_

_el techo de la habitación_

He walks out. Doesn’t wait to find her, doesn’t want to. Just goes, leaving her locked in the dressing room, angry noises banging through the door, grabbing his coat and pulling it on when he’s already outside shivering under the rain, feet sending the puddles splashing up onto the trousers of his suit that he hasn’t changed out of. _Fuck you._

He gets home quicker than normal, pace dictated by the fury, and slams through the front door to the kitchen, pulling out a bottle of whiskey and then collapsing on the sofa to nurse the drink, listening to the sips punctuating the patter of the rain on the roof.

_Tienen tanto que perder_

_sin embargo no pueden parar_

“Marc. Nice to meet you.” The moment their eyes meet sends an electric shock through both, both trying to ignore it, trying to breeze through it because of the other people in the room, Alex the only one outside the two of them who seems aware of it.

_God, ok. I believe you._ He watches them stand off slightly, both caught in it, and focuses on her, the way she looks at him, the way she meets the intense interest half way and returns it. _Fuck._ And she seems, ever-so-slightly, as if she’s been crying in between the end of the show and now, and the moment lasts a bit too long, until finally a conversation starts between the small group of them, her and Marc ending up stood side by side in the little circle, taking about the show and about MotoGP, and the traces of anger and upset seem to fade, before she’s laughing at his jokes and accepting a glass of something delivered with his hand resting on the small of her back, not noticing Alex watching, not noticing the deafening roar of Marc’s heart banging in his chest or how he’s almost choking on the nerves he’s tried to dissolve in alcohol throughout the show after being invited backstage on arrival; knowing it was coming.

And Alex is hearing Marc reply _yeah sounds good_ as they’re invited along to a bar on the other side of the Rambla, and he’s trying to get his attention and pull him back as they all pile into taxis to make the longer-by-road journey around to somewhere near Santa María del Mar, as far as the cars can take them before the pedestrian zone takes over, looking back over his shoulder to see his brother sat leaning on the driver’s side of the backseat, Mila in the middle, leaning into him and both still laughing and chatting, completely lost in each other. And he wants to just say it _hey, what are you doing, this can’t happen_ , but something in the scene stops him and he turns back around, knowing once the moment’s gone it’s probably gone, and sighs. _This is dangerous._

_Tesón primitivo y atávico_

_lazo de fuego_

The way his fingers slip under the fabric makes her expose even more of her neck to his mouth, increasing the moan until the noise dies in her throat as he pushes his fingers inside, thumb teasing her clit and making her fingernails dig in to the light denim of his shirt, _gas jeans_ , she’s somehow still vaguely aware, breath gasping into his mouth as he kisses her again, taste of blood now shared between them, bolts of pleasure shooting through her as his hand moves, rhythm increasing, aware of his hardness straining between them, aware the noises coming from her mouth are guiding what he’s doing, aware her teeth are sinking into his neck a bit too hard, aware her legs are shaking on the heels they really should have gotten rid of ‘before’, aware of every nerve ending as his hand slows and his thumb goes back to her clit, slowly circling and teasing, everything slowing into another kiss as her arms end up locked around his neck, pushing back against him for more, message received as his free hand digs in to pull the fabric down to her knees as she fumbles at his belt and buttons.

_Tan real el peligro,_

_irracional atracción_

“I am so excited about this.”

“Yeah, I gathered. Your prey will be in easy reach…”

“Hey, no! I’m not that bad. I genuinely just want to watch her again. She’s amazing.”

“She is. But you know you’re a MotoGP rider, and-“

“And she’s a pole dancer, at least for money that’s her job. I know.”

“So-“

“So? Tonight is tango. No problem.”

_La lluvia golpea_

_el techo de la habitación_

_You’re still not home._ The clock is now pushing 4, which in summer would mean him sitting there watching the dawn slowly illuminate the rain. But it’s not summer, not yet, and he’s still in the dark, whiskey significantly depleted, vision starting to blur. Everything starting to sink in. Things he said, things she said, things they threw across the room. _And you’re still not home._

_Y después dicen que no_

_que ya no se verán nunca más_

_It can’t be over._ He lets his eyes wander over the flushed cheeks and blown pupils, both still slightly breathless and still plastered to the wall, leaning on each other until they end up in another kiss, even now, sated and sticky and sensitive, feeling the same sparks start to fizzle again. _It can’t be over._

“Marc, you can’t tell anyone about this.”

“I know.” He lets himself fall a bit further and presses their foreheads together. “Neither can you.”

“I’m sor-“

He shakes his head and cuts her off, arms going round her properly to pull them away from the wall and let him feel like he’s holding onto her, before feeling her relax into him and press a kiss in the crook of his neck.

“Maybe in another life, eh?”

_pero el misterio_

_los arrastra al placer sin remedio_

“I’m going to the bathroom.” He didn’t mean anything by it, he didn’t mean to chase her over there. She’s still gone, and he wants to go. So he does, washing his hands after and staring at himself in the mirror, memory of how she’s felt sat on his lap half the night burning through the fabric of his jeans, knowing from the look in his eyes that he _knows_ morality has taken a serious hit. _But I don’t care. I’m more worried by how little I really care._ He lets that sink in, opening the door back into the corridor, before turning and stopping in his tracks as he sees her do the same, a few feet away.

“Oh. Hi…”

“Hey.” She smiles and walks back up to him, ending up close, too close to be safe, she realize a few seconds after, having to because he’s in the way, before they both flick their eyes from eyes to mouth and suddenly snap, crashing the kiss into the wall and then Marc feeling himself dragged, her obviously knowing the place well, down past the toilets, away from the bar, and into a store room whose door is slammed shut behind them.

_Aumenta el peligro_

_crece la satisfacción_

By the time he pushes inside and feels his eyes roll back in his head, she’s definitely the best sex of his life, already. The tight, wet heat closing around him after hours and hours of feeling like he was on fire just sat next to her is a release in itself, the mouth devouring his neck and leaving the last of her lipstick behind making him moan into her mouth and feel his legs quake as he starts to thrust, perfect height for it, her nails digging into his back adding just enough sting, shirt now open and allowing her hands to roam over the muscles hidden underneath. He moves one hand slightly further down the wall to brace them better before feeling he might not need it and wrapping it round her waist to pull them together as they grunt at each other, steady enough in the perfect rhythm they’ve found to manage it with the help of the wall, moving his other hand back between her legs and feeling the hair on the back of his neck stand up as she lets out a noise somewhere between a moan and a mewl, breath getting faster for both of them, taking a few seconds to learn what she seems to like the best and settling into a rhythm between his hand and hips thrusting. Her hand tangles in his hair, pulling him into another kiss, grip getting tighter and rhythm more and more desperate, determined to make her come first, feeling like he’s getting close as she lets him attack her neck again and her nails dig in before she wails up at the ceiling, neck muscles taught, muscles contracting around him and sucking the air from his lungs as he follows her over the edge, smashing their mouths together again as they hit the peak and then feel themselves go slack and relax, leaning back on the wall with their eyes closed for a few seconds to get their breath back, forehead stuck to forehead in the sticky heat they seem to have created, before his eyes open just in time to see hers do the same, both half stoned and half drunk and completely gone.

“Wow.”

_La lluvia golpea y golpea_

_el techo de la habitación_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> They shouldn't fall  
> but they fall into temptation  
> A whirlwind  
> of madness, of ardour and desire
> 
> If the danger increases  
> so increases the excitement  
> The rain slams against  
> the roof of the room
> 
> They have everything to lose  
> but they can't stop  
> Primitive and ancient tenacity  
> a bond of fire
> 
> A danger so real  
> an irrational attraction  
> The rain slams against  
> the roof of the room
> 
> And after they say no  
> they won't see each other again  
> But the mystery  
> drags them helplessly back to the pleasure
> 
> The danger increases  
> the satisfaction grows  
> The rain slams down  
> against the roof of the room


	4. Loco // Loca

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title- Enrique ;) :D [there will be some Bailando at some point ;) :P] and Shakira for the lady... [there will always be more Shakira ;)]
> 
> Thank you so far!! Please let me know any way you want what you think/if you like/hate/want more! ♥
> 
> Also imagine lots of other people commented on her IG, too, so it's less stalkerish. Just didn't write them out. ;)

Life isn’t the same as before. On the flight to Qatar he’d been out as soon as they took off, if not slightly before, a late end to the evening anyway and not made any better once back in his hotel tossing and turning and thinking; remembering or imagining the way she’d looked at him, the kiss after when it had felt like dropping off the edge of the world into heaven, and the kiss after after, when they’d been back in the rain on the street, attempting a goodbye without making it worse, ending up in a doorway hidden from the beam of the streetlight, Marc’s coat wrapped around them, sharing a goodbye kiss. _Dropping off a different edge._ Which in reality had been the longest of the night; more a ten minute hello and certainly making it worse watching her walk off up the street, head turning just far enough back for him to know she was wondering if he was still stood there watching her go, but not enough to confirm it to herself and actually see him.

_At least I know who you are? At least I know your name. At least I know what you do and where I can find you._

He took another deep breath to try and shake himself out of it as the memory came back, now getting out of his seat and grabbing his bag, ready to get off the plane, and back to a reality that he was hopeful would prove a better distraction than an empty new house that stills felt strange to him, and endless preparation with the goal so far away.

*

bailadoramila: Incredible show last night and was amazing to meet @marcmarquez93 @alexmarquez23 @titorabat ..thank you #RufeaTeam!

*

marcmarquez93 liked your photo.

_I bet you’re not going to follow me, though. I bet you’re not going to know if I follow you. And I bet you’re laughing and joking your way to your hotel by now, another memory to be printed over once there’s a better one. Or that’s what I’m meant to expect, right?_

marcsegre17: Cool! Were they nice @bailadoramila?

bailadoramila: Very nice! Best backstage visitors ever :)!! @marcsegre17

marcmarquez93: thank you! @bailadoramila

_Oh my God._

*

Alex: She doesn’t know it’s you does she?

Marc: No but I was thinking about it

Alex: Don’t, you don’t know what she’ll say

Marc: I slept with her in a bar storeroom and kissed her on the street, Alex…I think if she was going to tell she would have done. She told me I couldn’t

Alex looks down at the choice of words and frowns. _Slept with her._ And then scrolls through the message thread for any conversations about other girls and groans. _Sex, sex, fuck, sex…never ‘slept with’._

Alex: Playing with fire

Marc: Her boyfriend doesn’t look that tough? ;)

Alex: Oh so you remember she has one…

Marc: Tbh maybe it’s ‘had’. I didn’t ask, I didn’t care

Marc: And I’d do it the same again. Sorry but that’s the truth.

Alex: I would keep my nose out but it’s more to you than one night, that’s what I think is dangerous. People get hurt..

Alex: You shouldn’t stay with someone if you love someone else

Alex: But if it’s not enough to break up over, it’s not ‘right’ either, imo

Marc: I agree, I’m not going to do it again

Alex: If she turned up now you wouldn’t?

Marc: If she turns up is up to her. I’m going to talk as much as I want, but that’s it

Alex: Ok, I’m just worried

Marc: I know, I’m sure I’ll get over it in a while and thank you…

Alex: Jeje I can actually see you now, stop frowning! ♥

*

bailadoramila left a comment on @marcmarquez93’s photo: Congratulations for the victories, hope you do well in the land of tango, too! ;) :) 

*

Marc: See it?

Alex: Yes

Marc: So she’s not forgotten about me either

Alex: There are hundreds of comments from people, you’re world champion

Marc: And one from her. Can we go to a tango show in Buenos Aires?

Alex: Will you have sex with them in a bar? ;)

Marc: Only if they ask me to.. ;)

Alex: Hmm ;) :P well I’m sure they will

Marc: I hope so because [sorry…] this fantasy wank world in my head is in need of some fun

Alex: Thanks for the info :P 

*

Marc: Tango in bed, disappointing

Tito: Tango with girlfriend, very fun

Alex: No tango, fuck you all

Marc: Hahaha aww baby brother you’ll get there :P

Alex: Thanks I have been there :P

Marc: OH I KNOW, DON’T WORRY, I HAVE EARS :/ ;)

Alex: Sorrrrry :P

Marc: Didn’t sound like you had much to apologise for don’t worry ;)

*

marcmarquez93: Good celebration in Termas de Rio Hondo! #tango ;)

*

bailadoramila left a comment on marcmarquez93’s photo: Stylllleeeee!!! Jejeje thanks for expanding our audience ;)!

*

Marc: Sure, she’s forgotten all about me

Alex: Sure, you’re moving on

*

bailadoramila: I love pole dancing! With everyone else from the show tonight, was amazing to see everyone’s routines, #inspirations! Highest audience we ever had, thank you!!

marcsegre17: looks amazing! I think Supercross and pole dancing are the two most badass sports in the world :D!!

bailadoramila: @marcsegre17 wow thanks!! Should I change my name to Villopole-to ;)??

marcsegre17: Jajajajaja no! Camila is a nicer name! @bailadoramila

bailadoramila: @marcsegre17 mientes…

marcsegre17: @bailadoramila no, I’m a colleccionista de canciones too…

bailadoramila: @marcsegre17 :D ¡!!!!!!!!

*

Alex: WTF

Marc: Mexican band, song names

Alex: Oh…

Alex: I listened to some, this is cheesy

Marc: Yup it is, and kind of perfect at the moment :P

Alex: Oh god it went to rock ballad stage…?!

Marc: Fuck off

*

“Do you know that guy?”

“Hmm? Who?”

“The Marc guy on Instagram…”

“Awww baby are you jealous?” _Ooh bad subject._

“No…just wondering…”

“No, I don’t know him. But he’s always very nice and I reply to everyone.”

“Do you follow him?”

 _I tried._ “No.” _Private. Actually…did I try?_

*

bailadoramila: Tango competition, 1st place! Thanks for everything @toniobejarano #coach!

She waited, thinking maybe there would be a comment, and then gave up. _Oh, right._

*

Alex: Still with him then…

Marc: Yeah, I saw.

*

bailadoramila: #Roadtrip to #Jerez!! My other love…@marcmarquez93 ;) jajaja 

toniobejarano: Ouch … :P

bailadoramila: just joking my love ♥ [everybody shhhhh] gasssss!!! ;)

marcsegre17: I’m going too! #gassss! Have a great time :) @bailadoramila

bailadoramila: @marcsegre17 well that depends on the result jeje ;) you too!

marcsegre17: I’ll try my best to make the result good then ;) :D @bailadoramila 

bailadoramila: @marcsegre17 jeje ok! As long as we agree who we want to win?

marcsegre17: @bailadoramila we do! #namesake

bailadoramila: @marcsegre17 jajajaja :D

*

“What if she’d said ‘oh ok we should meet up?’”

“Then I would have had to say no?”

“And you would have?”

“Yeah, I would have. Like you said, she’s still with him, so…”

“So…”

“So I’m not going out looking for trouble.”

“…again. Missed a word…”

“Don’t…”

“Exactly. Don’t.”

*

bailadoramila: Shame we can’t get backstage here and return the favour ;) but here’s the view from our seat in #Jerez! #motera

toniobejarano: miss you! :/

samosahermoza: she doesn’t miss you @toniobejarano, sorry :/ 

bailadoramila: Jajaja @samosahermoza LIES, LARA! :P

marcsegre17: Favourite corner! :)

bailadoramila: @marcsegre17 me too! #NamedAfterTheWrongRider ;)

marcsegre17: @bailadoramila jajajaja

*

bailadoramila: hotel courtyard + wine + @samosahermoza = #VictorySalsaFor93 ;) :D

toniobejarano: Not bad!! ;) :P

bailadoramila: we were drunk, @toniobejarano! :P 

samosahermoza: I wasn’t that drunk don’t check my profile for the cigars #cubantriple ;) #bacarrrdddiiiiii

marcsegre17: Looks good to me! Mojitos…? 

bailadoramila: Yes mojitos @marcsegre17!! Jaja. Minty fresh :D

marcsegre17: @bailadoramila “better than toothpaste” ;) …?

*

Marc: I did something stupid last night

Alex: Please don’t tell me…

Marc: Depends if she remembers it

Marc: Nothing yet, might have got away with it

Alex: WHAT?!

Marc: ARGGHHH NO!! No no no. jajajajja NO!! By her I mean Mila and by 'if she remembers it' it's something from the bar!!! I mentioned it on [private] IG!! GOD. :P

Alex: OK GOOD :P I’m looking at it now, it looks innocent at least. Is it something you said?

Marc: Yes, is it obvious if she remembers that?

Alex: Guess we’ll find out…what was it?

Marc: Me: Another mojito? Careful etc etc... ;) her: it's got salad in it! me: that does not count as salad. Her: it's minty fresh Me: toothpaste is minty fresh, doesn't mean you should drink it her: THIS IS BETTER THAN TOOTHPASTE. Then after we kissed goodbye I think I said something cheesy like "hmm you're right it is better than toothpaste..."

*

"Lara wake up."

"No."

"Lara wake up I have never needed you to be less hungover ever."

"No..."

"Lara...I'm dead serious I am going to jump off the balcony into the pool if you don't."

"Why." Still buried in sheets, groaning. "I can't look as bad as I feel."

"I think I figured out why that guy's instagram is private..."

"Great. Go back to sleep."

"Um...no? I know who he is."

"If he's not the Pope no one cares."

"When you sit bolt upright when I say it, promise me you won't throw up."

"Don't want to lie..."

"Ok. Well...I think it's Marc."

"Yeah we know his-"

"No, I think it's _Marc Marquez_ from Motoclub Segre born on the SEVENTEENTH of February whose brother is called Alex and friend Tito lives in Almeria..."

"WHAT?!"

*

"Lara you promised..."

"I did not. And it was only a bit in my mouth."

"Such a lady."

*

bailadoramila: jajaja yes? Prove it! @marcsegre17

*

"How will he prove it?! Did you even ask to follow him-"

"No but-OH MY FUCKING GOD." She held up the phone and felt everything explode. "Oh my fucking God..."

*

marcmarquez93: Does this count as salad? ;) #celebrations #mojito :) thanks for the messages! pic.twitter.com/onibw8t13


	5. River Deep, Mountain High

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title - Tina Turner.
> 
> [sorry for being needy but...] please let me know what you think? [the difference it makes is massive]. I hope you like it...! ♥ and thank you!

"Ok I think I'm going to pass out."

"Request to follow the other one...come on come on..."

"Ok ok done..."

*

marcsegre17: morning from Cervera. Did I prove it yet? [no make up on yet, be kind ;)]

titomeria: Good morning, handsome ;) 

marcsegre17: jajaja morning my love :P

titomeria: give me back some duvet :P 

marcsegre17: Jajaja do you feel exposed?

titomeria: Laid bare

marcsegre17: ok stop now I can hear you laughing next door :P

marcsegre17: actually @titomeria are you in Alex’s room?!

alexsegre12: we switched, I couldn’t make it up the stairs

marcsegre17: I’m quite glad I didn’t see you like that

titomeria: correct reaction

marcsegre17: @titomeria my dad is going to knock on your door asking you if you want breakfast in about 3 minutes, have fun with it ;) jejeje

titomeria: jajaja I would but how? 

marcsegre17: try a deep man voice telling him ‘your baby Alex’ is still asleep jajaja @titomeria

*

Alex: Morning! Tito’s in my room!!!!!

Alex: As in, I’m on the sofa, no need to send help, don’t fall for it xD

Alex: Dad?

Alex: Dad…

_Please answer._ He listened to the phone ringing in the kitchen, about to get up and go and ruin the joke in person, before groaning and collapsing back on the sofa as he heard the giggles erupt upstairs. _Too late._

*

Marc: GUYS SHE FOLLOWED ME

Tito: Call the police! Is she in your garden?! :P

Alex: …

*

marcsegre17 accepted your request

*

“Ok moment of truth…” She took a deep breath and then opened the profile, same anonymous pic at the top, and then felt her heart drop to the floor. _Holy shit._

marcsegre17: morning from Cervera. Did I prove it yet? [no make up on yet, be kind ;)]

bailadoramila: Holy fuck Marc, what the hell?

marcsegre17: @bailadoramila couldn't follow from official, you're a pole dancer with boyfriend…

bailadoramila: @marcsegre17 what’s that supposed to mean?

marcsegre17: @bailadoramila no no didn’t mean it like that. I meant the world is a dick for thinking like that, I DON’T, and I wish you didn’t have him

marcsegre17: sorry shouldn’t have said that @bailadoramila

bailadoramila: yeah definitely true @marcsegre17 

marcsegre17: @bailadoramila sorry, please don’t disappear…it’s early and I’m nervous.

bailadoramila: Ok but @samosahermoza my partner in crime and I are trying to get in better contact with someone from a show in Barcelona because I can’t be around here much…

marcsegre17: is that your salsa friend Lara? @bailadoramila

bailadoramila: Yes! We’re looking for someone who helped out a lot with the _costume changes_ after the show but we lost his card…

*

Marc: What the fuck does that mean?

Alex: He can see her comments on his feed I think, but not yours or the photo

Marc: Right?

Alex: Really…?

Marc: What?!

Alex: She wants your number, idiot. And I think I made coffee

Marc: OH. Ohhhh… :D?! And you think?!

Alex: Be careful… and yeah it’s hot and brown and liquid but I can hardly live and it might be gravy

Marc: I miss my innocent brother, this world champion one is an idiot

Alex: last night he was but he also got his Moto2 first podium so :P

Marc: hmmm ;) ♥ [dos cojonnnessss!!]

Alex: Breaking news…

Alex: It’s gravy

Alex: Wrong granules

Marc: I’ll send mum

Alex: Thank you

*  
   
Antoni: “Holy fuck Marc, what the hell?”

Mila: Met him yesterday at the race; funny photo! We’re just at the airport, stop pining! :P

Antoni: Ok good, I have good news! :)

Mila: Ooh ok :D stop talking me :P

Mila: Stalking, oops xxxxx

Antoni: :P instagram’s fault

Mila: Hmm :P xxx

*

marcsegre17: twitter DM @bailadoramila

bailadoramila: Thanks for your help! 

*

marcmarquez93: DM @bailadoramila 694 729 825 x

*

623…: Hi…

Marc: Hello :) 

Mila: Double identity check please

Marc: Pff asks you?! You first!

Mila: _Media content in this message_

Marc: Morning ;) _Media content in this message_

Mila: Morning, only just :P

Marc: Jeje. How are you?

Mila: Arrivals at El Prat looking for coffee

Marc: is the ‘looking for coffee’ part the answer? ;) jeje

Mila: Jaja pretty much! How are you?? Well done on your victory!!

Marc: Thank youuuu!! I’m ok. Bit hungover, but the state of my brother has helped me keep perspective

Mila: Jajaja I saw the picture xD

Marc: Jajajaja. You?

Mila: Same but with Lara

Marc: She’s your best friend?

Mila: Yeah :) and we found coffee. Talk later! :)

_Oh right, ok…_

Marc: Maybe in another life, eh? ;) :/

Mila: Don’t, the guilt’s killing me

Mila: Just not as much as the other thing

Marc: The other thing..?

Mila: Not talking to you

Mila: Or at least not knowing I was talking to you :P

Mila: I should be mad and freaked out or both

Marc: Should…? ;)

Mila: I’m trying but that photo was too puppy dog eyed

Marc: I try my best ;)

Mila: You’re evil :P

Marc: Ok please don’t say _that_

Mila: Sorry. Xxx talk later, help Alex in any way you can…

Marc: Jeje I’m trying xx

*

alexsegre12: Aftermath #neveragain

marcsegre17: @alexsegre12 after life

edi627: @marcsegre17 @alexsegre12 after death…

titomeria: jajajaja

 

*

Mila: I’m embarrassed by my fangirling now

Marc: Jeje I’m not

Mila: :P

*

marcsegre17: Motocross day, lunch time, what the fuck is this??

bailadoramila: it’s green so it maybe came from the ground

marcsegre17: @bailadoramila jaja maybe? The maybe is the worry xD

alexsegre12: @bailadoramila @marcsegre17 oh also Mila don’t be embarrassed, no one fangirls quite as hard as Marc fangirls over you ;)

*

Marc: Bastard

Alex: Jaja :P

Marc: Have you set off yet?

Alex: About to. Mum is bringing food xD

Marc: I love her

Alex: She loves you, but she’s saying it with a kind of exasperated expression

Marc: Puppy dog eye her

Alex: Done, didn’t work

Marc: Ignore it

Alex: trying but I’m sat in the front

Marc: Jajaja is dad in the back?

Alex: Yeah he’s ‘keeping the food secure’

Marc: Jajajajaja aww see you soon!!! I got the cleaner to come and everything :D

Alex: Small victories

Marc: Hmm quite a big one

Alex: Heard from Mila?

Marc: No..?

Alex: Um, check Instagram…

*

bailadoramila: Amazing news! We’re taking the show on tour all summer :D #actuallygettingpaid ;) :D

marcsegre17: awesome! @bailadoramila where?

bailadoramila: US and Canada! @marcsegre17 :)

*

Marc: Fuck, when?

Mila: Hi how are you, I’m ok thanks :P

Marc: Sorry :/

Mila: June-July-August. Montmeló to Silverstone in your world

Marc: You’re going before Montmeló?

Mila: Yeah…

Marc: Fuck, was hoping to invite you

Mila: Invite me?!

Marc: I don’t know how it would work, was just an idea. And you’re gone the whole time?

Mila: Yeah, I’ll send the dates through

Mila: Get them?

Marc: Yeah. Chicago?

Mila: Yeah..?

Marc: 4 days before Indy, google maps says 2h43minutes

Mila: Antoni will be there

Marc: I’m not trying to make you cheat, I just like spending time with you

Mila: I like spending time with you, too. Although we haven’t done much…

Marc: Ok good. Why don’t you visit?

Mila: Visit?!

Marc: Before you go, either before or after Mugello, come up to Andorra

Marc: No one will know or see you, it’s really private [hence why I live here]

Mila: Are you serious?

Marc: Yes. No ‘evil’ plan, you’re just very fun, and very funny :) Seems like you want to forget what happened after, but even before that I really liked you. As a friend as well as my future wife. 

Mila: Fucking hell Marc…drinking?

Marc: Only a bit, was just a joke

Marc: You’re also the only woman who swears at me like my brother ;) :D

_Woman._

Mila: It’s a really bad idea

Marc: Like staying out in Aragon? Or opening the gas when you’re already on the floor?

Marc: That turned out deeper than it was meant to be

Mila: That’s what she said

Marc: Jajajaja oh pleasseeee just come up and break my balls hiking or teach me to tango

Mila: I said it was a bad idea

Marc: *puppy dog eyes* Brno?

Mila: It’s an obvious Aragon

Mila: Tell me what days you’re free…

Mila: It isn’t a date

Mila: But it’s not because you’re the World Champion either

Mila: It’s because I’ve not had that much fun with anyone other than Lara for years

Mila: And I will teach you something, just not sure if it will be tango #differentkindofPOLE :P

*

Marc: She’s visiting me!

Alex: Marc…

Marc: Before Mugello :D

Alex: What should I say?

Marc: Nothing about all the stuff I already know…

Marc: How about ‘I’m happy for you that you have a new friend’

Alex: That then

Alex: Don’t get me wrong, I would do most things for someone like that

Alex: But…

Marc: Hands off ;) :P

Alex: Hands off your ‘friend’? Hmm?

Marc: Shall I just be honest?

Alex: Yeah!

Marc: I don’t care. She’s not meant to be with him, she’s meant to be with me

Marc: I’m not going to do anything but I’m not going to refuse anything either

Marc: And I’m not going to let her out of my life, at least

Marc: Not sure if you noticed but I quite like her

Alex: You gave that away a bit

Marc: Well I notice things too, and I’ve never had anyone look at me like that before

Alex: You really want me to stop reminding you of sensible things?

Marc: Yes, I promise I know

Alex: Then I’ve never seen anyone look at you like that before, either. And I get it.

Marc: Ok, good. Challenge accepted. ;)

Alex: Black flag, 93

Marc: I’m joking

Alex: I’m not!

Marc: I’m not. Does it make me a bad person? Or is it worse to not even find out?

Alex: I’ve no idea, I’m 18 and not in love with a pole dancer

Marc: Pfff this is about life not about her

Alex: Still 18

Marc: No, you’re Alex, and I want Alex’s opinion :P

Alex: Then it’s worse to not even find out.

*

“You realize what you did earlier?”

“No?” The older brother frowned and shook his head, taking the almost empty bottle of wine from his brother and putting it on the side, last few things to clear before heading to sleep almost done. “What?”

“I said, ‘I’m not in love with a pole dancer’ and you said, ‘This isn’t about her’.”

“Yeah?”

Alex nodded at him, little shrug, and then turned to head up the stairs, looking back to say it. “You missed the part where you say ‘I’m not in love with her’.”

_I missed that part, I did._ Marc stood there for a while, words hitting him in the face and forcing him to, everything suddenly flushing hot with panic, before picking up the almost empty bottle and heading out onto the terrace with a blanket off the sofa, watching the lights twinkling in the valley and taking a deep breath before taking a long swig and leaning his head back on the wall with a shiver.

_Don’t think I missed a thing, actually._

Marc: We should climb the mountain opposite my house, the view would be amazing

He sits and stares for a while, aware the timing for a reply probably isn’t great, before feeling that familiar lightning bolt as the screen lights up.

Mila: Sounds good, although I’m pretty done with heights after these heels. Fucking ridiculous

Marc: Show tonight?

Mila: Practice

Marc: How do your feet live?

Mila: They don’t

He frowns at that, having expected more wit, before taking a deep breath.

Marc: Are you ok?

Mila: Not very. Argument with the ‘coach’

Mila: Or the boss, as he seems to think

Mila: Sorry, please ignore that

Marc: I’m not ignoring it unless you’re ok or will be

Mila: Will be. :) How’s the view roundabout now?

Marc: Stunning

Mila: You’re sat outside?

Marc: Yup, I am. Freezing! Everyone’s gone to bed

Mila: Not you?

Marc: On the way, just thinking [and staring at the mountain]

Mila: Go to sleep

Marc: Hmm, will do soon. Where are you?

Mila: Passeig de Gracia, or nearly

Marc: I miss the city

Mila: You know it well, or just well enough?

Marc: Well enough, and I miss when I could just go down there and wander round and no one would know who I was

Mila: I can imagine. Do you miss having one title and a handful of fans?

Marc: Sometimes

Mila: Do you miss having no money of your own? No way of knowing where you were going to end up?

Marc: No.

Mila: Do you miss seeing double?

Marc: No ♥

Mila: Time passes, some things get worse and others get better. Trick is to recognize the better all the time.

Marc: Jorge, is that you?

Mila: No jaja, this is a cold and frustrated Mila, making sure you go to bed dreaming about climbing the mountain, rather than standing on top of it looking down being scared

_I think I love you._

Marc: It’s a long way down

Mila: No one’s going to push you off

Marc: Sometimes feels like they’re trying

Mila: They’ll fall first

Marc: Have you ever fallen first?

Mila: Yes, Antoni. And at the same time

Marc: At the same time?

Mila: Yup, but I think we broke the fall ok. 

Mila: Sorry. Kind of just wish you were here right now.

Mila: Night, Marc. I’m at my front door now.

Marc: Same. Night.

_I think we broke the fall ok._ He sat there a while longer, finishing the wine and still staring at the mountain under the moon, before nodding to himself and getting to his feet.

Marc: I think I’m still falling


	6. Nada

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More, already :) ♥
> 
> If you don't know the Montoya team radio reference you need to! ;) ♥
> 
> Translation of the few song lines is at the end. :)

Mila: That’s fucking cheesy

Marc: Good morning :P

*

marcsegre17: JUST SAW POL AND EINA AND I RAN AWAY :/ I’m now accidentally in a carpet shop hoping Pol and Eina don’t want to buy carpet

alexsegre12: jajajajajjajaajjajaja we’re in the café opposite the supermarket we went to before if you can run

bailadoramila: EINNNAA!!!! :D

titomeria: Aleix will be nearby, take precautions

marcsegre17: jajaja @titomeria TRUE ;) and @alexsegre12 I will try and make a run for it

marcsegre17: nope

alexsegre12: be more specific

marcsegre17: they’re getting close I think I have to stay here and buy a carpet

alexsegre12: mum says she has the measurements for the small hallway in her handbag so you can actually buy a carpet if you want

marcsegre17: Didn't know mum had a small hallway in her handbag? :P

marcsegre17: but YES! Please :D

alexsegre12: 1.89 x 3.67m

marcsegre17: ok cool what colour should I get @bailadoramila?

bailadoramila: BLACK

marcsegre17: was thinking dark blue

bailadoramila: is it an office?

marcsegre17: No :P

bailadoramila: then no. what are the others floors like?

marcsegre17: mostly light wood stuff, mountainy

bailadoramila: you are annoying me with your adjectives :P

*

 _Oh my God._ He gets the phone out and stares down, expecting a text and now looking down at her picture smiling at him, buzzing and waiting to actually talk to her. _You’re calling me._ “H-hi?”

_“Hello. It’s Mila the pole dancer. Remember me?”_

_And suddenly the nerves are gone._ “Hello. Yes, vaguely. What colour carpet would you like in your future house?”

_“Marc..”_

“Jeje. Options are beige, dirty beige, white beige, more beige, orange beige, yellow beige, mouldy beige or any other beige of your choice.”

_“Fuck beige._

“I agree but there aren’t many cool ones.” He pulls the phone away from his ear for a second before pointing at the next book of samples and smiling at the knowing look on the shop assistant’s face. _Hmm, not quite._ “Ok new book, more beige, also kind of sack stuff.”

_“Sack stuff.”_

“Wait, I’ll touch it.” He blushes slightly at that and runs his fingers over the texture before making a reasonably impressed face and nodding to himself. “Feels good.”

_“This is definitely the weirdest conversation I’ve had for a while.”_

“Hmm I distinctly remember a game of ‘What would Enrique do?’ in the bar, Mila.”

_“Shhhhhhhh. And back to carpets and floor coverings…is it like woven and quite a big weave?”_

“Big weave? Yes. It’s like a Berber mat.”

_“There we go, a real description.”_

“Jeje. I’m trying! I’ve never bought carpet before.”

_“I feel like you should call Alex over to the shop to share it., big moment”_

“Hmm…I’m ok with the company actually…”

_Course you are. “Well then I think it sounds good. Natural?” Me too._

“Yeah. And I imagine it feels good on your feet.”

“It does.”

He jumps slightly, having forgotten about the shop assistant, and then giggles to himself and blushes before clearing his throat. “Ok I’m going to do it.”

_“Awesome. I’m assuming you have furniture for when I visit though?”_

“Yeah I managed that much! There’s even a toilet. No, 2!”

_“Wooooo!! Ok babe, I need to go now, train’s here. Buying it?”_

He stands there for a second, wondering if he’s imagined it, before managing to find his voice again and nodding to himself, massive grin starting to appear. _Ok, babe._ “Yes, buying it. Thank you.”

_“No problem, I look forward to spilling red wine on it.”_

“I do too.”

_“Ok, bye…”_

“Bye…” _Babe, love you._ He looks up sheepishly at the shop assistant and smiles through a shrug. “Lady wants it, lady gets it…”

“Know the feeling.”

*

marcsegre17: Bought a carpet, I am now grown up

titomeria: you bought it because you were hiding from Pol Espargaro and his dog

marcsegre17: shhhhhhhh

bailadoramila: ooh I like it!

marcsegre17: @bailadoramila I DO TOO. Thank you! :)

*

Marc: Thanks for the help, ‘babe’

Mila: Honest mistake

Marc: Good to know, I almost said I love you, bye when I put the phone down. Honest mistake… :P

Mila: I would think you were a complete dick if you weren’t you

Marc: Thanks?

Mila: You’re welcome xx

*

marcsegre17: they fitted the carpet

alexsegre12: this isn’t what I imagined when I said we should get 2nd accounts

bailadoramila: oh it was YOUR FAULT @alexsegre12

alexsegre12: @bailadoramila guilty :/

bailadoramila: thank you @alexsegre12 ;)

bailadoramila: also Marc I like the lamp in the corner

marcsegre17: thanks! Me too :) [see I can do some things on my own]

titomeria: @marcsegre17 how was your mum’s lasagna last night out the freezer

marcsegre17: @titomeria really good thank you for asking

bailadoramila: I can’t cook FYI :P

marcsegre17: that’s ok @bailadoramila, I’ll buy someone to do it

bailadoramila: @marcsegre17 smooth

marcsegre17: @bailadoramila Jorge is that you?

bailadoramila: it was almost funny the first time, now I’m going to wear a Lorenzo shirt tomorrow

marcsegre17: Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!

bailadoramila: jajajaja reaction noted ;) think I need to wear it to protect myself

marcsegre17: @bailadoramila fabric shmabric, all rips the same

*

Mila: Pffffffffff you’re so sweet on the phone and such a nightmare in written conversation

Marc: Everyone gets nervous

Marc: I’ll try and be more of a nightmare when you get here

Mila: I’m not coming…

Marc: You’d better be joking..

Mila: Yup I am ;) what have you defrosted?

Marc: Shit do I have to feed you?!

Mila: Well I’m getting there in…2 hours and if we’re climbing a mountain tomorrow some calories may be useful

Marc: Jeje I know. I COOKED. I actually cooked.

*

Mila: He cooked

Lara: I don’t think he’s joking about you is he?

Mila: Nope

Lara: And…?

Mila: And it’s incredible, until I get home and I see Antoni

Lara: And how does that make you feel?

Lara: #therapist ;)

Mila: Jaja. Guilty as hell. And it makes me compare

Lara: Compare?

Mila: Him to Marc. 

Lara: Ok and?

Mila: Maybe it’s just because it’s new

Mila: There’s nothing else happened, FYI. I meant knowing him

Lara: Hmm :P well you know what I think, regardless of Marc. Antoni is a dick

Mira: Yes thanks I know your opinion

Lara: So who’s better?

Mila: Not answering

Lara: Who makes you laugh more?

Mila: Not anwering

Lara: who makes you feel like you’re 6ft tall?

Mila: not answering

Lara: How far away are you from that person?

Mila: I’m in the middle of the journey so :P

Lara: Why, babe. Why?

Mila: Because I remember everything before

Lara: That was before

Mila: And I know how hard he’s working

Mila: And I know what I mean to him

Mila: It’s just a rough patch

Lara: You cheated 

Mila: Yes. Not proud. I did. Although I was thrown out of my own house and yelled at to leave right before that and he cheated before

Lara: Yeah see, dick

Mila: But he also spent days being the perfect nurse

Lara: Perfect? That’s not perfect, that’s perfunctory

Mila: He made a big effort

Lara: A big effort to do just enough and still go out with his ‘friends’ (dicks) and leave you there for hours

Mila: It wasn’t too bad by then

Lara: Sure, that’s why you swore so much and your eyes welled up

Mila: I injured myself, not his responsibility

Lara: Not responsibility. I would not have done that, and I’ve never tried to propose to you before.

Lara: Who would have done more? 

_I’ll not ignore it unless you say you’re ok or will be._

Mila: Not answering, and I’m here now.

Lara: Enjoy yourself and answer my questions sometime :P

*

 _Wow._ “H-hi…”

 _Wow._ “H-hi…”

They stand there for a second outside the station, shivering, staring, and then the tension snaps with a laugh and the conversation starts, Marc pointing out his car and opening the passenger door for her, before he gets in and takes a covert deep breath. “Right, home…”

“Hmm. I’m excited about the Berber mat.”

“Good because my mother wasn’t excited about the price.” He grins over at her and sees the smiling blushed ‘eek’ in return, letting himself squeeze her knee and indicating to turn out the car park before hooking his Ipod out the dashboard and passing it over to her, fingers brushing enough to send a little shock through the car. “You choose the music…”

 _Ooh._ “Well I think that’s quite a big ask…” She smiles to herself and starts scrolling through, starting to relax, and then smiles as she gets to ‘C’. “Hmm am I allowed to play my name band?”

“Camila? Whatever you want. I like it. Especially at the moment…”

“Hmm. Me too.” She presses play and puts it back where she saw he got it from, and settles down to look out the window.

_"Solamente pienso en ti, desde el dia en que te vi…"_

“Good choice…”

“Thanks.”

_"Dices que este amor fue un momento, un beso que no existió. Mientras tú me olvidas, yo intento prenderme a tu corazón…"_

_Surely you did this on purpose._ “Good journey?”

“Yeah thanks. You?”

“Nervous. Driving like Pastor Maldonado.”

“Jajaja. Oh dear!”

“Oh deer? Like a horse with horns?”

_"Llueve olvido por aquí, alguien te arranco de mí. O tal vez soñaba despierto…"_

_You’re laughing like you know that joke._ “You know that’s-“

“Yes Juan Pablo, I know what that is. Eyes on the road, if this is a Lotus you’re going to need them.”

_"Y nada, y nada, soy sin tu amor. Sin tu amor, no soy nada. Nada, nada soy sin tu amor..."_

“Mila?”

“Hmm?”

“You know you’re perfect, right?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And these are the [slightly badly translated, sorry, I'm tired] lyric snippets I left in Spanish; from "Nada" by Camila. ;)
> 
>  
> 
> _I've been thinking only about you since the day I saw you - You say that this love only lasted a moment, a kiss that didn't exist. Meanwhile, you forget, I intend to capture your heart... - Here it rains oblivion, someone ripped you from me, or maybe I was daydreaming... - And I'm nothing, nothing without your love..._
> 
>  
> 
> Also went back to present tense for some reason :/ ♥


	7. Rules

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title- Shakira. 
> 
> Sorry for the delay...I've been busy, then AO3 was down, and also this chapter was an impossible nightmare to write, but if I don't post soon I feel like I'll be tweaking it forever so here you go... ♥
> 
> Please let me know what you think, very very appreciated ♥

“So…you like it?”

“I do like it. A lot. Especially the Berber mat.”

“Good.” He grins, aware that now the tour is over there’s very little to keep him occupied from the haunting nerves that came back as soon as they walked in the house, and finds the same kind of face reflected back at him. _And now you’ve been here, I hope it’s not going to have to be the reason I sell it; seeing your face everywhere._ “Food? Hungry yet?”

“Hmm. What are we having?”

“Pasta and salad. Simple but-“

“Sounds perfect.”

“Ok…” _We’re still grinning at each other like we’re 12._ “I already made the sauce and the salad but the pasta will only take a couple of minutes.” _Breathe._ He makes it to the kitchen, flash of inspiration leading him to open the fridge, smiling back at her and pointing inside. “Wine?”

“Hmm, sounds good.” She smiles and nods and then sits at a stool at the center island, watching him unscrew the bottle and then start to pour the glasses, before stretching to take off her sweater and smirking and melting in equal measure at the tremor of _arghhh she’s taking off clothing_ that makes the bottle clink against the glass. “Marc?”

“Hmm?”

“Look at me…”

“Right…?”

He does, leaving her a bit unprepared for the look on his face, and she’s the next to take a deep breath. “There’s nothing you can do to make this a date-“

“Yeah, I know. I’m not-“

“Hey, let me finish.” She raises her eyebrows, smiling at the sheepish _sorry_ on his face, before nodding and shrugging a bit helplessly. “You can’t make this a date because of two things. One, I can’t live with myself if we call it that.”

_We._

“And two…it’s not a date in the normal sense anyway. There’s nothing you can fuck up, unless you’ve been lying about who you are… _again_ …” 

He smiles at that, maybe a vestige of guilt but definitely won over by a kind of bashful cheeky, and then nods. “Ok...?”

“So…can we stop being nervous?”

“Well…I don’t know…can we stop flashing skin in the kitchen?”

“Well…I thought that would be welcome to be honest…”

“Mila…” He gives her a kind of _you know damn well it’s very welcome but also why it’s very cruel_ face and shrugs. “I want to spend time with you. I also want to drag you back upstairs to my bedroom and not let us out for a week. So SHHHH.”

“I was just joking!”

“I’m not. It genuinely feels like you’re a magnet, ok? So we don’t flash skin in the kitchen, unless I’m allowed to touch it.”

“Fair enough… maybe…”

“Maybe?”

“Maybe.” _Stop looking at me like that, please pleeassee._

“Ok, if we’re being offensively honest, what’s happening is that the second I stop chanting my _don’t start it but don’t say no_ mantra and come over there and even try to get close to you and break my rule-”

“You have a rule?!”

“Yeah, I do. Because I don’t really like the situation, but I can’t change it. So to make myself feel better, that’s the rule. You touch me, I don’t say no. But I don’t make it happen.”

“So you don’t think I’d say no if you did?”

“I don’t know, but I’m not going to test it.”

“So if I start it-“

“Yeah.”

“Does it make a difference?”

“It makes a difference what I can rationalise easier. But not really.” He stops a second to knock the rest of the wine back and then shrugs, suddenly feeling 10ft taller. _Sorry baby brother but…_ “Honestly I don’t give a fuck.” _Wine was a foolish mistake._

“So it’s just sex-“

“No, not you you idiot. I mean, I don’t know him, and from what I’ve heard I don’t want to. So why should I care more about hurting him than hurting me?”

“Yeah, sorry. I just…we should probably talk at some point-“

“Not now though, yeah?”

“Ok. Now pasta?”

“Now pasta.”

She watches him pull out the stuff and get to work, getting up off the stool to walk over and take a peek, very impressed and sharing that in the facial expression, earning her a grin and wink, before he passes his ipod and points to the speaker. “Ladies choice…”

“Hmm. Ok…can I use mine?”

“Yes. Didn’t think about that. Treat it like home?” _Hey, please move in, my bed would look perfect with you in it._ “If that’s not too presumptuous, you know…”

She smiles to herself at that, starting some low salsa music and then receiving a wedge of parmesan and a grater to take part, feeling a little shiver of electricity every time he looks over to check progress, before she closes her eyes and bites her lip as he comes to stand behind her and peers over her shoulder into the bowl. 

“Perfect…”

_Yes, I think you might be._ “Good. Anything else?” _God you smell good._

“Don’t think so.” He smiles and takes the bowl, putting it on the table on the other side of the room and putting the dish of pasta in the oven, before standing there in the middle and holding out his hand. “So…”

“So…”

“I already did one kind of salsa…your turn…”

“Hmm…lesson time?”

“Who says I’m not a pro?”

She grins at the attempt at arrogant smirk, coming over more nervous hope, and ups the volume on the music until it’s loud enough to actually fill the room, walking over and standing in front of him before taking his hands in hers. _And it feels so terrifyingly right._ “Ready…?”

She looks up to see him look down at their hands, obviously feeling the same, and then their eyes lock and they’re both grinning again. “Yes…”

“Then let’s see if your hips lie…”

*

“Pretty impressive. For a first timer.”

“Thank you. Not so bad yourself, for a professional…”

“Jaja. We should do motocross and you’ll feel arrogant again, don’t worry.”

“Seriously?”

“Um…yeah? If you want.”

“I want. I _want_.”

“Ok! Calm down. Play it at least a little bit cool…”

“Hmm I prefer hot…”

“Get that dish out the oven and stop.”

“Yes, Miss.”

_Yes, Sir._

*

They eat, and it’s actually very very good, and the conversation goes back from the slightly risky edge of before and back into giggling and nodding and eyes shining at each other across the table, just far enough apart to not be able to touch each other, both grateful for the self-control given by that, before suddenly they’re back in the kitchen getting a bit more wine, aware again that there’s no plan, no distraction, nerves biting back although having already taken heavy casualties from the assault of the alcohol.

“So are you going to teach me to tango now or are we going to do normal sensible things after eating?”

“Normal sensible things. Does that mean a film?”

“Yes. It does. A film and I have popcorn.”

“You’re a genius.”

“Thanks.” He beams and nods, grabbing the bag of popcorn and kind of scooting her through to the living room in front of him, before she stops and he almost barrels into her.

“Sorry…”

_God._ Right behind her, smell of shampoo and glorious female-ness just about overriding the smell of cooking, he breathes it in and clenches his teeth, memory of the last time he’d done that hitting him like a truck. _The room and the bar and the wall and the look on your face-_ “What’s up?”

“Going to get changed. Can’t watch movies in jeans, it’s against the rules.”

“Right…” _Fuck it’s like kryptonite._ He clears his throat slightly as she moves away, getting his breath and sense back, and then raises his eyebrows at the question on her face. “What?”

“I literally just told you it’s against the rules?” She grins at the _Oh for God’s sake_ face as he looks down at his jeans, and then nods. “So…”

“Right…that includes me…?”

“Well we’re friends aren’t we?”

“Hmm, sure…”

_That smirk should come with a warning._ “So if we’re having a girls’ night in, you have to dress appropriately…”

“Girls’ night in…”

“We’ll get there, babe. We’ll get there.” She grins and nods before pinching his cheek and starting off up the stairs, hearing him follow a couple of seconds later. _What is wrong with me tonight._

She changes into black jogging bottoms and a Marquez t shirt, hoping the reaction to that will be as good as she imagines, and makes it back to the living room before him, sitting on the bigger sofa and waiting until she hears footsteps to turn round and then feel her breath catch. _Casual cosy Marquez. I’ve caused the apocalypse._ Black jogging bottoms and a white t shirt. _Every. Single. Muscle-_

“Arghhh I see merchandise!”

“Like it?”

“Absolutely not. Hate that guy…” He winks and sits next to her on the edge of the sofa, dealing with the Blu ray with slightly shaky fingers before it’s done and he’s on the verge of the horror decision: _where the fuck do I sit now._

“Marc?”

“Hmm?”

“If I ask you to sit next to me does that follow the rule?”

“Yes…”

“Then please sit next to me.”

He nods and sits where he has normally been sitting, on the end, this time next to her, and tries to keep focus on everything else. _Just…how did this even happen. ‘Stay over’, ‘great idea’…_ Trying to force himself to relax is excruciating, until finally he’s almost there, arm along the back of the sofa but not to try anything, stance open and he realises as it happens, _inviting_ , maybe on purpose. 

“Can I do this?” She locks eyes with him as she shifts and moves closer, snuggling in and letting her fingers splay on his chest, feeling the tension sear through him for a few seconds before feeling it suddenly just snap and disappear, his fingers tracing patterns on her forearm as his arm goes round her, satisfied sigh from both as they get it right and both settle down to watch the film, properly, _like I dreamt of in one of the few non x-rated dreams…_

They watch, and shift a bit more, until they’re really slouched and lazy, and comfortable and aware how comfortable with each other after the barrier’s been broken, Marc’s fingers playing with her hair, her fingers moving ever-so-slightly side-to-side on the fabric on his chest, giving her a squeeze or pressing a kiss into her hair at the little reactions to the film, feeling the same given back, munching gradually through the popcorn, hands sometimes brushing each other but no nerves, just poking out the way or, in Marc’s case, grabbing and forcing to drop the prize, feeling of him laughing sending little aftershocks through her.

_I’ve known you five minutes and I could do this for five years._

*

“Good film.” _I guess all good things come to an end…_ “But don’t want to move...”

“Me neither. I think I’m in heaven. Almost.”

“Almost?”

“I’m a little bit cold and not close-“

She gets cut off as he moves, pre-empting it and snuggling down properly, pulling her down and into him until she’s surround by a wall of Marquez on one side and a wall of sofa on the other, head just tucked under his chin. _Almost, meet Heaven._ She breathes him in for a second, staying reasonably still in the suspended reality, afraid to move will break it somehow, until she feels his hand move down her back and under the fabric of the t shirt to play patterns on the skin, and then gives up and does the same, hand under his t shirt, legs tangling just enough together, and finally both end up eye to eye, sharing one of those silent moments where a lot is said, eyes firing messages the few inches between them. 

_Sure?_

_Me? Yeah. But I can’t say it out loud…_

_The rule...?_

_The rule._

_So if I kiss you…?_ A smile tugs at the corner of his mouth as they get to that bit, reading the tiny raising of her eyebrows perfectly and eyes closing as her mouth meets his, nodding into it and feeling his chest explode; the memory of the last time fresh in his mind, the differences with now, so much slower and relaxed but still making him feel like he’s being slowly, deliciously electrocuted, the feeling of her pulling him in and closing every inch of distance possible, feeling how possible that seems to be and how well they fit together, the little spark of fire as she nips his lip, the opposite calm sigh from both at some point as they suddenly just relax, content to kiss for the kiss and let the clock tick down towards that other decision they have to make. _I just get lost. As soon as we-_

_Sure? Yeah._

“I’m not here to cheat. I mean, I’m not -“

“I don’t care, we can stay here all night if you want. I just want to be close-“ _And that’s actually true._

“Or you could carry me upstairs and we could pretend-“

“Yeah, I could do that.” He pulls away enough again to get eye contact, brushing some errant hair out the way, before closing his eyes and resting their foreheads together, room now shockingly quiet once the credits have finished, voices naturally lower. “But I need to ask you something. Ok? Just to know-”

“Anything.”

“Ok. Do you love him?”

“Yes.”

_Ow._ He bites his lip at that, pain shooting through his chest much more than he expected, before feeling her fingers brush through his hair, hope rekindling slightly. “Is there a ‘but’…?”

“Yes…” 

He opens his eyes again at that, sharing the expression he sees in front of him, somewhere between bliss, torture and relief, and gulps slightly. “Right…”

“But…well, maybe it’s not a but. But…” She smiles sadly at the look on his face and snuggles down again to talk into the fabric of his t shirt. “It’s difficult. He’s been in my life forever. I mean…can I talk about this?”

“Hmm. If there’s something at the end of the rainbow to make me feel less like I’m going to cry…?”

“No crying, promise.”

“Ok.”

“Then…I’ve been with him for nearly 6 years. He’s the first person I slept with, and the only other person I’ve loved. He’s been my trainer and coach and absolutely everything since I was 17.”

“Please let there be a but…”

_There’s a Marc. Much more powerful._ “But…” She takes a deep breath and suddenly feels the emotion hit her, fingertips digging into his back a bit more and feeling him instinctively pull her in. “But sometimes maybe you think something’s amazing, and you say you’re really happy. And then something happens…and suddenly everything looks a bit different…and it’s overwhelming and confusing…”

“Something happens?”

_Something completely life changing._ “You.”

_Me. I happened?_ “Oh. Ok... Can I ask something personal?”

“Anything.” She nods into his chest and smiles at the little murmur and the way his fingers echo it. “Can’t promise I’ll know the answer…” _Like, will you ever leave him? Do you love me? Is this a movie cliché or the moment I actually understand what love is in the first place?_

“Hmm well…you say he’s the first…you know, person you slept with…does that make me the second?”

“No. Sorry? We’ve not been together the whole time…he cheated. Before, and we broke up…he made lots of promises, he seems to have been keeping them…and now I cheated…” She takes a deep breath and buries her head in the crook of his neck. “Probably about to cheat again…” 

_Probably about to cheat again._ “Mila?

“Hmm?”

“You said other.”

“When?”

“A second ago, you said he’s the first person you slept with and the only _other_ person you’ve loved.”

_FUCK._ “Y-yeah…I guess…I did.”

“You mean m-“

“Yes I mean you.”

_You have to leave him. At some point, you have to leave him._ “Ok. Shall we go to bed now?”

She nods into his chest, eyes tight shut as she feels him move and then gets picked up and carried over to the bottom of the stairs, lights turned off and everything quiet, listening to the one set of footsteps making its way upstairs, before he’s putting her down on the end of the bed and standing there staring down.

“So you love me, too?”

“But I don’t mean I’m going to-“

“I know. I’m not banking on anything, but tonight we pretend that that’s enough and that everything’s going to work out fine, ok?”

“O-ok…” She holds his gaze for a few seconds, breathing the only sound, before taking his hands in hers and pulling him in, moving back as he kneels over her on the bed and slowly pushes her wrists back into the mattress, faces centimetres apart.

“I’m going to break my rule, now. Ok?”

“I didn’t see a Marquez following rules for that long anyway to be honest…”

“Hey!” He lets that dirty smirk take over again, moment chosen perfectly to try and climb back up the hill into Hope: Population 2, and hovers his face lower, seemingly trying to decide which side his nose should be, before locking their eyes together and feeling the desperate futility of the past few minutes of conversation fade again, reality of the moment taking over from fear about the future, everything about it sinking in. _You’re here, and I’m here, and a few weeks ago that was enough to be my wildest dream. So let’s start there._ “That’s very unfair-“

“Don’t try and pretend-“

“Nah, not me.” He grins and finally presses a chaste kiss to her lips. “Just unfair on Alex.”

_Of course._ She smiles at the ceiling as his lips start on her neck, hand rifling through his hair, before pressing her lips against his ear “Marc?”

“Hmm?” He breaks the line of kisses down her jaw to look back at her, frowning slightly again as she pushes him up until he’s kneeling in front of her, worry back full force. “Problem?”

_Same one, just need to know the scale of it._ “H-how do you feel about m-“

_Oh. Yeah I never said that._ “I love you. Now be quiet…” He smiles slightly sadly at the look on her face, slightly shell shocked himself at the way it just tripped off his tongue, and presses a finger against her lips with a nod. _Maybe it’s just the easiest thing in the world to say when you mean it._ “And let me show you.”


	8. Instinto

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Joderrrr...this is the most challenging chapter I've ever written, by _miles_!! So sorry for the wait...Please please let me know if you like it, and thanks so much for the responses so far, it makes such a difference to writing [and usually to the timescale, sorry!] ♥

_‘Let me show you’. Why did I say that. No pressure, just try and make every single one of these million and one things firing through my chest obvious to you._ They lock eyes for a second, Marc aware his finger is still on her lips, before he takes it back and takes a deep breath, tracing her jaw with his fingertip, letting his eyes follow it, and then combs his hand into her hair to hold her head there for a second, eyes finding hers again. _‘Let me show you.’_

“Don’t be nervous. Come here.” She pulls him down onto the bed and switches them around, now sat on his lap, arms round his neck, skin already burning as his fingers trace around her hips and lock behind her. “What’s wrong?”

“Feel like I set myself up for failure…” He sees his red faced smile mirrored and steals it back with a kiss. “Think I’d need 20 years to show you how I feel, to be honest.”

“Marc?”

“Hmm?” Eyes closed, he smiles into another kiss and lets his hands wander under the fabric of her t shirt.

“I know exactly what you mean, and that’s why we don’t have to be nervous. Ok? Just…go on pure instinct…”

“Instinct.”

“Like when you’re on the floor in Brno and all seems lost and then you open the gas…”

“Like when common sense tells you you’ve spent 5 minutes with someone but instinct tells you within 1 that you’re in love-”

“Please don’t. Like I said-“  
“I know, I’m not saying it because I’m trying to bully you. Just saying it because it’s true.”

“Then yeah, like that.”

“Ok then.” He opens his eyes again, breath between them the only noise in the room, and nods, fingers closing around the hem of the t shirt and starting to pull it off. “Instinct…”

*

“This is further than I expected, I’ll be honest. What does the sign say, 2 hours?”

“Yup.”

“And we’re professional athletes, and we’re about half way and it’s taken an hour and a half.”

“And we didn’t hold hands or stop for photos, or stop for kisses, or stop to stare at the view…not once or twice or 26 times…”

“Hmm, fair point.” He makes it again, pulling her back by the hand and stealing a kiss. _This is heaven. Being allowed to do this is heaven._ “Sorry I’m not as fast as you probably expected…”

“Well slow can be good…”

“Slow _can_ be good. Jeje.”

“But now we really have to get to the top if we want to make it home before Motegi.”

He grins at that, nodding and trying to be serious, before bending to pick her up and setting off running up the path. “Lap record!”

*

_And suddenly, you’re right._ He moves his arms above his head to let her pull off his t shirt, both now shirtless and breath stolen still by the relaxed, soft kisses passing between them, her fingers tracing the muscles in his arms once the fabric has made it to the floor, his fingers tracing up her spine towards her bra and undoing it surprisingly easily, to his relief, letting it fall from his fingers and his hands go back to her hips, lips moving over her jaw and down her neck, skin shivering as her fingers tangle in his hair, noises hitting his ears making his heart skip every time he’s able to elicit them. _It’s the most natural thing in the world._ He feels her squeeze her shoulders in slightly, reading that perfectly, and moves his hands back up her back to slip his fingers under the straps of the bra and pull it off and towards him, Mila raising her arms once it’s half way down and then putting them back around his neck, bra behind his head and falling to the bed, locking eyes for a second and pausing to share the moment, nerves replaced by something more like being drunk on each other, dark eyes and short of breath, tiny changes in facial expressions read perfectly, sparks of encouraging, evil mischief proved right as he finds that spot on her neck again, moving lower, teasingly slow now the destination is obvious, hands just pushing below the waistline of the jogging bottoms, feeling her hips roll towards him in response to allow more, cupping her to him and humming against her skin before his mouth finally finds her nipple and the noise as he flicks his tongue out makes his hair stand on end. _Instinct._

*

“Put me down now, come on.”

“I can make it-“

“Yeah maybe you can, but at this rate I’ll have to carry you down!”

“Hmm well I’m sure you’d manage-“

“I’m sure we’d die alone up here.” She smiles at the desperately-trying-to-hide puffs of breath and then ruffles his hair at the nape of his neck with her hand. “Come on, down.”

“Pffff…” He makes it another 3 steps before stopping and taking a deep breath, finally lowering her back to the floor. “Could totally have made it.”

“Hmm. Well…we can see the top now so let’s just...have a break, yeah?”

“Ran out of water.”

_God the pout on it._ “Marc Marquez you’d better start grinning again.”

He sticks his bottom lip out properly and shakes his head, arms folded, about to say something before he gets a spray of water to the face and splutters. “Mila!”

“Awwww baby got all wet.”

“Pff! What was that for?!”

“Clean the pout off.”

“Pfff.”

“Well…you could dry yourself off if you, you know…took off your t shirt…”

“Oh, I SEE. Dirty tactics.”

“Very very very very-“

“Ok stop.” He clamps his hand over her mouth and grins, one eyebrow up. “I think we can probably make a deal…”

“I’m female, it’s different.”

“You are. You’re also wearing a sports crop top thing under that t shirt.”

“I am. But I’m not wet.” She takes in the look on his face and giggles despite the terrible predictability. “Ok, fine…”

“Wow, that was easy!” He grins and follows suit, pulling off his own t shirt and stuffing them both into his bag, licking his lips in a purposeful pantomime.

“Don’t know why you sound so surprised. Every time I’ve spent more than 5 minutes with you I’ve ended up pretty _wet_.”

“Ok now we need to get to the top because we need to get home as quickly as possible.”

“Jejeje. Ok, 3, 2, 1…”

He takes off running before the countdown ends and leaves her yelling _jump start!_ after him, still able to catch up by the time they reach the top, not having carried another human being what felt like 50kms. _Bastard. Also, you said home._

*

_God, I really do love you._ Pushed back into the bed, her hair hanging down and giving them a little curtain between them and the world, tickling his collarbone, he lets himself breathe and wait for the moment of captivating eye contact to end as she dips her head to nip his earlobe and kiss down his neck, rolling her hips again and sending electric shocks through his groin as his hands dig into her ass, both feeling it at the same time and breaking the kiss to free themselves of the last bit of clothing, no socks to either make everything inelegant or irritating, before she’s back there, skin on skin now feeling like fire. They both groan into another kiss but don’t move to rush, Marc eventually turning them over, lying next to her propped on his elbow, taking the sight in again for a second, her hair splayed out on the pillow, eyes black but patient, chest moving up and down betraying the half-hidden desperation, running his hand down her side to come to rest on her hip and then up her thigh as she bends her leg, skin shivering under the touch, breath getting slightly faster as his fingers reach her knee and stop, circling, teasing, eyes locked together through the tiny, wicked eyebrow raise, and then trailing back down to her inner thigh, mouth going dry at the way she closes her eyes and relaxes completely into the pillow, trusting and waiting, legs far enough apart to give his fingers room to tease and ghost over the skin, wetness expected, or _at least hopefully_ , but still sending another tremor of electricity to his now painfully hard cock as he pushes two fingers inside and feels it, knowledge that it’s _him_ causing that somehow amazing, thumb teasing her clit and nuzzling into the crook of her neck as she gasps and her knuckles go white, clawing into the sheets, unravelling bit by bit as he teases as slowly as it seems like she’s willing to put up with without grabbing him. _God, you are so beautiful._ He tries to judge what makes her make what noise, every single one sending shivers down his spine and hypnotized by the sheen of sweat on her forehead as the get louder, before he kisses back up to find her mouth, teeth trapping her bottom lip as he pulls his fingers out slowly, tracing back up towards her stomach and leaving a trail of moisture, hand guided to her mouth and licked clean, eyes locked together again, conversation completely silent but saying more than enough, before he presses his lips to her ear, her hand tangling in his hair, and then leaves a kiss on her cheek as he gets pushed down into the mattress again, that wonderful hair trailing towards him again, hips guided by his hands, finally feeling his eyes roll back in his head as she slowly lowers herself onto him, fingers lacing through his and relaxing against him for a second, forehead to forehead before another kiss, his words getting half lost in her mouth. 

“You’re so beautiful it’s _almost_ unbelievable.”

*

“We made it.”

“We made it.” She grins at him and leans on him slightly, both trying to get their breath back, before they both sit down and lean on their knees, Marc opening his bag to pull out food, Mila hers to pull out drinks, before they pass each other their half and start to munch, staring at the view, feeling the overwhelmingly comfortable silence, sound of the birds the only one for miles, getting about half way through before ending up side-eyeing and smirking at each other, just about managing to not spit at each other as they try to talk.

“What?”

“Me what? You what!”

“I was jstt lking at your topppp.” He smirks again and points down, swallowing the mouthful of sandwich and able to talk properly. “Didn’t notice that.”

“Ah, yeah.” She looks down, evidence of the night before in a few little marks and bruises, before looking back at him, sharing a little ‘eek, sorry!’ face. “You’re worse.”

“Really?”

“Sorry…”

“I think I’ll live.” He grins back at her, eyes locked together again in one of _those_ moments, before leaning his head on her shoulder and looking back at the view, seriousness suddenly winning again, lacing their hands together. “You know if we sat up here forever no one would know?”

*

_If you could see what I see…_ It’s enough to make her breath catch, the way his neck tenses and the noise that he makes, fingertips digging into her hips, some hair plastered to his forehead, patience of both of them by now tested and the effort of holding back evidenced in the heat sticking them together. _Maybe it’s true what they say; the hottest thing in the world is seeing someone come undone. For the first time ever, it seems to be._ She frees their hands as their eyes lock together again, starting to move, his hands back on her hips, hers running over his chest as she sits up again, feeling the difference, every noise real and unconscious, eyes closed because she wants them to be, hair falling wherever it falls, no show or faking for the person below her, no _I know you like it when I do this…_ , nothing considered except responding and eliciting the same unconscious connection from him, that realisation the only other things in her mind as she opens her eyes again and looks down, _connected_ is the word, and moves down so they’re face to face again, mouth to mouth, his arms moving around her to hold her there as his hips move, perfect rhythm in time with the noises she can vaguely hear herself making, kiss now just as deep and desperate, copper tinge starting to appear on their tongues. _How am I ever going to go back._ She rests their foreheads together again as he slows, noise of their breathing filling the room, a self-imposed pause, she can tell, to try and get them both there at the same time, and then moves slightly off him as his hands go between them, thumbs tracing down her stomach, before her eyes flash at him as they trace down each side of her clit and stay there, already sending a shockwave through her that he feels clench around him, words coming out breathless. 

“Now move…”

*

“Seriously, I am driving you back.”

“You don’t have-“

“Ok, first of all, I get extra time with you. Secondly…well, no. That’s it. Even without just wanting to be nice…”

“Nice? You?!”

“Fuck off.” He flips her off and sets off up the stairs to fetch a jacket, calling over his shoulder. “Don’t try and argue with me!”

She smiles to herself, shrugging in acceptance slightly, and sits down on the end of the sofa arm, staring outside at the view for what will surely be the last time for a while, memory upon memory of what is unbelievably only two days fast forwarding through her head, before he reappears and drapes himself round her shoulders from behind, lips finding her ear.

“You’re going to come back, right? Sometime…”

_Sometime._ “Yes, I’m going to come back.”

“Ok then, I will let you leave.”

*

He knows she’s getting close from the noise, from the hands tangling in the sheets each side of him, from the kisses that are now desperate smash-and-grabs from both of them, mostly hitting the target but some littering necks and jaws and cheeks, and from the faster and faster breath hitting him on the cheek, burning over his skin, his most definitely doing the same, amazed he’s still in control of himself, amazed at the feeling of it, no barrier between them, just skin on skin, amazed that, however physically incredible it feels, the emotions wracking through him are even more incredible, hopefully and seemingly shared, passed between them in the odd moment they almost seem to have been distracted by each other’s eyes and kind of faltered, and reiterated with every little touch, him concentrating on her and her on him, _maybe that’s the difference_. She groans again, neck muscles taught, before moving back down flush to his chest, letting his hips take over again, one hand moving around to the small of her back, lips back on target and smashing together one last time before there’s a final, breathier, higher moan hitting his ears and she shudders, name echoing through the room, muscles clenching around him pulling him over the edge with her, release sending another groan towards the ceiling, hands going back to her hips and holding her there as they ride through it, eyes tight shut and completely lost on the wave of it for long enough to make the low lighting in the room seem like the sun when they both open their eyes again, panting at each other. _Wow._

“Ok…” She nods and starts to smile, aware they’ve not really moved, relaxing against him and lacing their fingers together for something to lean her arms on, before taking a few more breaths and smiling wider and wider as he starts to, moving off him and ending up side by side, letting the words go just far enough from his mouth for her lips to graze his, room quiet again through the whisper. _How will I ever leave._ “I love you, too.”

_How will I ever let you leave._ He closes his eyes and wraps her up a bit more, as close as he can without starting to overheat again, despite the air con. “Please don’t leave.”

“I have to. And you have Mugello.”

“But-“

“I have to leave this house. We have to leave this, at some point. It doesn’t have to mean-“

“Just tell me something honestly, please…”

“Hmm?”

“I just…tell me what you’re thinking?”

“I’m thinking I’ve never felt anything like this before.” She lowers her voice and presses her lips to his ear, letting it sink in, feeling his arms tighten around her again. “And I don’t know how I’d ever live without it. Ok?”

He nods into the crook of her neck, rearranging them slightly for another kiss, and feels the little post-zen cloud of panic disappear again as the clock ticks on towards getting tired enough to sleep, brain shut off again and lost in the feeling of the skin under his fingers and the tongue playing with his. _Ok._


	9. Landslide

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title- Fleetwood Mac/Stevie Nicks. Lyrics very appropriate :)
> 
> Thanks so much!! Bit better updating speed this time to say it properly ;) ♥

marcsegre17: We made it to the top!! @bailadoramila :) ♥

bailadoramila: Yeah we did! And same to you… ;)

marcsegre17: I hope you mean the ♥ @bailadoramila

bailadoramila: Yes :P

marcsegre17: good :P

*

“Hi, remember me?” He grins round the door frame, everyone grinning back but in a definite _oh what are you doing_ kind of way, and then makes it fully into the living room, Roser smothering him in a hug and then a not-too-reluctantly received kiss on the cheek. “Hi mum…”

_And then you…_ He cringes at the _yay my brother is home! But also my brother needs to have a serious look at his life choices_ combination of emotions on Alex’s face and follows him through to the kitchen, half hug and hair ruffle from Julia on the way, before he’s being pointed at to sit in a chair, coffee appearing in front of him, and arms folded little brother sat opposite him. “So…”

“So…good bike ride yesterday?”

“Don’t even try it.”

“What?!”

“You know what!”

“You mean Mila.”

“Yes I mean _Mila_.”

“Well…what do you want me to say?”

“Did you sleep with her?”

“No…” _And my cheeks are totally not bright red._

“Marc…”

“What?!”

“Marc seriously, just tell me, ok?”

“You know I don’t actually have to…”

“No, you don’t. But you really think that would be a better idea?”

“Hmm.”

“So you slept with her.”

“Um, not sure that does it justice…”

“Arrogant?” Alex smirks across the table and takes a sip of his drink. “Hmm?”

“No! I just…I love her. I am completely in love with her and it was just friends secretly in love with each other watching a movie…then somehow I’m carrying her upstairs and-“

“Somehow…”

“Somehow after she told me she loved me too, yes we ended up in bed.”

“And it was good.”

“Ok I’m going to say it and then I’m going to go to the bathroom so you can laugh at me alone, ok?” He gets up from the chair, downing the last bit of coffee, and then shrugs happily and helplessly. “There is a difference between sleeping with someone and making love, and now I know that difference. And for the first time ever, I actually feel like I know what I’m doing with a house and moving out and everything, because she makes me feel like a man. Ok?!”

“You can’t just say that and-“

“Watch me!”

*

“Stop avoiding me…” Alex knocks on the door and presses his ear against. “There’s nothing left in this room for you to even pack.”

_“I think I’m going to need all my childhood toys for Mugello.”_

“Right, I’m coming in.” He opens the door and walks in, Marc lying on the bed staring at the ceiling, and sits down on the chair opposite, vaguely reminiscent of a therapy session. “I’m not going to laugh at you.”

“Find that hard to believe.” He smirks over and throws the teddy bear he’s been staring at for too long. “But good. Because it’s true…”

“And she still has-“

“Yeah, she still has a boyfriend. And I don’t think that’s going to change until at least Silverstone, so…”

“Silverstone?”

“The tour.”

“Oh…yeah I guess if he’s her partner then-“

“Yeah, exactly. And yes, it’s driving me insane already. And yes, I feel slightly bad now…but what can I do? Either he’s miserable or I am. PLUS…” He sits up again, cross legged and facing him, “It’s not like it’s not up to her, is it?”

“What?”

“It’s not my responsibility. I’m not cheating on anyone.”

“But-“

“But, but, but. Yeah, I know. And I don’t care. Honestly, without all this stuff in the way…do you like her?”

“Mila? Yeah. She’s amazing.”

“Yeah I know.” He grins and goes a little bit pink at the inability to keep the lovestruck tone out of his voice. “So…sorry, but that’s all there is to it.”

“You don’t have to apologise. To be honest…it’s not great, but it’s not your responsibility. I’m just worried you’re going to get hurt.”

_Aww._ “Yeah I’m pretty worried about that too. But what am I going to do? Ignore it? Or try?”

“Well obviously you’re going to try-“

“Exactly.”

*

Marc: I miss you :(

Mila: I miss you too. How was practice?

Marc: Pff you didn’t watch? ;) :P

Mila: Yes I did watch and yes you were fast, but frowning in the pit box…

Marc: Ah, yeah…nothing too bad, just a bit more tyre deg than normal

Mila: Ah ok. It’s terrifying watching you now :P

Marc: Why?!

Mila: Because I love you!

Marc: Aww. What have I done to deserve this?! ♥

Mila: Just texting me good morning on a race weekend when I was kind of scared you would have forgotten about me

Marc: Yeah definitely forgotten all about you, there are so many hot men around here! ;)

Mila: Haha :P stay away from the grid girls! :P

Marc: I’ll do you a deal…I’ll stay away from them if you leave your boyfriend and move in with me. Ok?

Mila: Ouch

Marc: It was only a joke. I’m jealous as hell but I’m not jumping into bed with anyone else.

Mila: That doesn’t seem fair

Marc: Do you like the thought of me sleeping with someone else?

Mila: NO

Marc: Well then welcome to my world. I think one of us feeling like that is bad enough

Mila: Sorry I’m a hypocrite

Marc: That answers my ‘are you still sleeping with him’ question then

Mila: Actually it doesn’t, because really not often. [not since I got back from Andorra]

Marc: Ok…

Mila: And I think we really need to talk about this, can I call you?

Marc: Always.

“Hi…”

_“Hey. Um, I’m really sorry where that conversation went-“_

“It’s ok. I think, if you’re calling me for good reasons…”

_“I’ve been thinking.”_

“Ok, I’m listening.”

_“Am I going to scare you off?”_

“Um, depends what you’re going to say…but I seriously doubt it?”

_“It’s about future things…”_

“You mean about when you’re going to move in, when we’re going to get married, what we’ll name our kids?”

_“Marc…”_

“Hmm I normally hate people who name their kids after themselves to be honest but it is a good name...”

_“Please stop it, now I’M terrified.”_

“Jeje. Well…two of those things terrify me. But I’m only joking. Just proving the point.”

_“Well you answered my first question. Which was ‘do you actually want to be with me?’”_

“Ok seriously has that not been obvious?”

_“It’s important to know rather than just…hope.”_

“Well I would do anything and I really like where this conversation is going…”

_“Ok well I can’t leave him until we’re back because maybe, maybe there is a tiny chance he would still be my coach and partner even if we weren’t together, but that would or will take months for him to deal with.”_

“Uff.”

_“What?”_

“He’d still be there?”

_“I seriously doubt it, but…I don’t know.”_

“Ok.”

_“Ok?”_

“If you’re saying you’re going to leave him when you get back from America and be with me, no not ok.” He takes a deep breath, staring at the ceiling in the motorhome, and then bites his lip to try and keep his voice steady. “Amazing. You serious? Because-“

_“I’m really serious. I…I’m really terrified b-but…”_

“Ok, let’s not both cry.” 

_“Jeje sorry. Sorry for sniffing, too. Ladylike. I just…it’s really sad. I don’t…I don’t know how to explain it but…I feel really guilty, obviously. And I don’t want to hurt him. But I…I don’t know, since being back…everything he does just seems so different. Irritating. Or selfish. And he just…I don’t know. I just feel like I was looking at him the same way I did 6 years ago. But 6 years ago he was nicer, and I felt like he cared. And I didn’t have anything to compare it to-”_

“Me? Because I’ve not exactly done great on, for example…not falling asleep on the phone to you…”

_“Jeje. That’s different, especially after a day at Rufea. He just…I just…I just remember how it felt when I was 17 and he was the center of my world and everything we promised and…and I…it’s so scary. What do I do? Nothing’s turning out how it was meant to-“_

“Hey, it’s ok. Deep breath. What’s not how it was meant to be?”

_“I’m meant to be in love with him, I’m not meant to be a pole dancer and a cheat, I’m meant to be a tango dancer and I’m not meant to live in that shitty apartment. I’m supposed to be achieving things. I just don’t know how I ended up here.”_

“Strangely enough I kind of know how that feels.”

_“2011.”_

“Yup. But you can change those things that aren’t meant to be like that. You can change whatever you want and you don’t have to be terrified about anything because you’re amazing and I _know_ you’ll be good at whatever you want to do.”

_“Thank you but I don’t even know what I want-“_

“What makes you happy?”

_“Dancing, and you.”_

“Well I’m definitely not going anywhere. And dancing?”

There’s a deep breath from the other end of the line before he can kind of sense she might be nodding. _“Honestly, I love pole dancing. I love it more than tango. I love tango, and I love winning. But it’s not quite the same.”_ Another deep breath. _“Pole was meant to pay the bills before we did better at ‘proper’ dancing.”_

“Have you ever said that out loud before?”

_“N-no…”_

“You know just because something was ‘meant’ to happen, doesn’t mean you can’t change the plan. What’s meant to happen is that you’re meant to be happy. So you want to do pole dancing? Do you want to be with him?”

_“I want to be with you. But then I’ll be a pole dancer with no qualifications, or well…no good ones, and…that’s it.”_

“That’s it?”

_“Everything I’ve been focusing on for years is just gone.”_

“Mila?”

_“Y-yeah?”_

“Honestly, is it your dream, or was it his?”

There’s another, longer pause, before a teary choked-out answer. _“H-his.”_

“Ok.” _God I wish I could hug you right now._ “So what’s yours?”

_“To be happy.”_

“And what makes you happy?”

_“Pole dancing. And you.”_

“Did you just decide-“

_“Can I come up to Andorra again before Montmeló?”_

“I’ll be in Cervera. Come there?”

_“Ok. And you know what I just realised?”_

“What?”

_“He can’t pull out of the tour even if he wanted to. Contracts, etc..”_

“So you mean-“

_“Yeah, I do. I think I do.”_

“So when you get back-“

_“No, starting now. Fuck it, starting now.”_

“Starting now?”

_“I’ll call you back.”_

_WHAT?!_ He stares at the now silent and dead phone for a second, terror and excitement coursing through him, before managing to send out a call for help. _This escalated quickly._

*

Marc: I think she’s leaving him

Alex: Seriously? When?

Marc: Right now...


	10. Lemon Sorbet

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for reading/commenting/kudossing ♥ you keep me ticking over and although I always say it I always mean it ♥
> 
> Maybe it's because it's the middle of the night or maybe it's actually fluffy, but...yup. ;) I just hope you like it.

Marc: Mila I’m a bit worried, can you call me back or let me know you’re ok?

Marc: Baby please just let me know? If you couldn’t do it yet that’s ok

Marc: Just let me know you’re ok

*

“Did you text-“

“Yes.”

“What did you put?”

“Um, normal stuff like ‘I’m worried, call me back’…”

“How many?”

“Um…about…20?”

“Jesus.”

“What?!”

“No that’s normal, don’t worry.”

“Don’t be evil, I’m worried.”

“I know, but what can you do? Just sleep and see if or when she calls-“

“If or when?”

“Yeah?”

“She’s meant to be leaving her long term boyfriend for me, there’d better be a fucking when!”

“Alright, I’m sure there will be. Calm down.”

“Pffff.”

“Beer?”

“Yes.”

*

Marc: Babe it’s been two hours and I really have to sleep but I really just want to know you’re ok

Marc: I don’t want to call and make it worse if he’s there

Marc: But just please let me know? I love you.

Marc: Ok I love you a lot, and I miss you, and I’ll try again in the morning. Xxx 

*

Mila: So sorry, I tried. It got really ugly. If you’re asleep, talk tomorrow xxxxxx

Marc: Awake xx Are you ok?

Mila: Not too bad

Marc: Please explain 'ugly'

Mila: He’s a mess anyway. I know I’ve never talked about him but he’s a mess, and it was going to kill him

Marc: But you’re physically ok?

Mila: Oh :/ yes I’m fine, he would never hurt me. 

Marc: You know I’ve heard that before and it wasn’t true so please just don’t assume and be careful ok?

Mila: I promise, I promise. ♥ 

Marc: So still with him?

Mila: I’ve not mentioned you/anyone else, and I tried to just say ‘look, one type of partner only, just dancing’ but he basically begged and cried and asked what he could do to make it better or give him another chance

Mila: So I said we could do a trial during the tour, more as friends, and then re-assess when we're back. When I'm then done with it.

Mila: I think he got the gist

Marc: Which was…?

Mila: We’re not sleeping together.

Marc: Oh, ok :)

Mila: I don’t want to

Marc: Don’t want to what, amor?

Mila: Sleep with him

Marc: Well you definitely don’t have to

Mila: I know, I’m just worried he’ll get suspicious

Marc: I don’t care if he gets suspicious and neither should you

Mila: Yeah that sounded a bit fucked up didn’t it?

Marc: Just a bit. No is no, not a problem. And if it’s a problem, he is the problem. Ok?

Mila: Marc Marquez can you give my heart back please I’m finding it hard to live without it.

Marc: Sorry I’d quite like to keep it :/ Use mine, you’ve got it somewhere there I think… ;)

Mila: We’re so pathetic ;) ♥ you know those ten minutes before we went to sleep the other night?

Marc: Yeah..?

Mila: I would love that so much right now. ♥ 

Marc: Don’t. I’m very aware how far away I am. ♥

Marc: Are you on your own?

Mila: Yeah, I’m walking down towards the Rambla del Mar

Marc: On your own…

Mila: Me and about 500 other people on the busiest street in the city, deep breaths my dear :P ♥ 

“Hey.”

_“Well if it isn’t the world champion…”_

“Talking to the Queen of Hearts…”

_“Jaja I knew you liked that routine.”_

“Baby, that routine changed my life.”

_“Jaja. You ok? Sorry about the mess.”_

“I’m ok if you’re ok.”

_“I’m ok. Bit fragile, hence the walk.”_

“I know, I can tell. What can I do?”

_“Just a few minutes on the phone I think will do the trick.”_

_Know the feeling. Ok._ He finds himself finally start to relax again, unaware quite how unrelaxed he’d been, and smiles at the ceiling. “Ok. Are you free this weekend before you leave?”

_“Yes.”_

“Come up and stay with me again?”

_“I’d love to.”_

“I would love you to.”

_“Then I will. And I’m grinning again.”_

“Me too.”

_“Marc?”_

“Hmm?”

_“Are you serious about this?”_

“For once, yeah.” He clears his throat and takes a deep breath before nodding at the ceiling. “Didn’t think you could want anything more than a MotoGP title.”

_“You already have me.”_

“That would sound better whispered in my ear…”

_“Smooth.”_

“Jaja thanks. But…you know.”

_“Yeah, I know. Next weekend.”_

“Next weekend.”

_“I’m going to let you sleep now, but…I’m sorry. And I’ll see you soon. And talk soon?”_

“How often is too often?”

_“Um, whenever…? Text first though.”_

“So we’re secret, but exclusive.”

_“Yes. Secret for now. Is that enough?”_

“That’s enough for now, yeah. Or maybe I mean ‘all my dreams came true…’”

_“Los sueños se cumplen, crack.”_

“Jaja. They do. They must do. So…I’m talking to my girlfriend…?” _Oh my God._

_“Yes you are.”_

He takes another deep breath, sudden wall of emotion he knows she’ll find pathetically adorable hitting him in the chest, before closing his eyes and letting the smile take over his face. “R-right.”

_“Stoppies at 300km/h and he’s reduced to a mess by the word girlfriend…”_

“Ok well you’re already a terrible girlfriend!”

_“Jeje. Sorry. And maybe we should have shared this moment properly, but I’ll tell you what I’m looking at and you can close your eyes and paint it on the motorhome ceiling. Ok?”_

“Picture?”

_“I was going for more romantic…”_

“Then please paint me the picture.”

_“Ok. I’m in Plaça Reial. I’ve just walked off La Rambla, and I’m looking at the fountain. A lot of the tables are still full, there are people milling around. Music coming from a few places, nothing too loud to stand out. The sky is inky blue, stars visible enough despite the city. A few clouds glowing grey near the moon-“_

“Wait.”

_“What-“_

“I’m going outside, hang on. The ceiling isn't big enough." He pulls on a hoodie and jeans, before picking the phone up again and pulling the hood up, going outside to sit on the step, shivering slightly in bare feet and smiling to himself at the view. “Ok _luna_ , I’m looking at you, too.”

_“Clouds?”_

“None over Mugello. Just hills, and stars, and the hum of the campers. Carry on…” _Please carry on._

_“Ok. There’s a kid with a Pique shirt asleep over his dad’s shoulder, and his partner is just catching them up with a hyperactive little girl who’s making her all exasperated, but still smiling. She’s caught up now, and they’re holding hands, with each other and with the dad in a little line. Little Pique just woke up and locked eyes with me over his dad's shoulder and I’m waving at him…he’s grinning at me with a smile you’d be proud of…”_

“Aww.”

_“The mum just looked back at me and smiled, following what he was looking at. There’s a cat stalking down through the pillars past the place that sells the incredible ice cream. Black, with a white spot on its nose. It’s like a little firefly dancing towards me. And speaking of dancing, there’s a group of street performers just started back on la Rambla, I can just see them but it’s filling up fast around them. The music isn’t too loud, tropical beat. Making my hips want to join in._

_There’s a man in a leather jacket sat on one of the little benches, talking into his phone. Looks like he’s being stood up, but he’s still looking up as a couple of women pass him. They’re both beautiful. One’s wearing a bright red dress and she looks a bit like Sofia Vergara. The other is all in black with Shakira hair. They’re talking about something serious, I can hear little bits and pieces filtering to me. They’re talking about someone who is ill, and ignoring the man looking at them. Now he’s looking at me, and I’m shaking my head at him and turning away. I’m looking back past the fountain again now, towards la Rambla, walking round the opposite way, passing the cat who’s following me and meowing. The trickling water sound is gone now. The cat definitely looks well fed. The dancers have finished their first song, and people are applauding. Now I’m walking down again, towards the sea. There’s a few caricatures still out. There’s one of you, all grin. I’m smiling at it and he’s looking at me like he knows he’s got a picture of a very popular young man for sale. Say hello, amor, you’re on speaker.”_

_Arghhh._ “Mmm...hola. Soy yo, Marc Márquez….er…gracias por dibujarme…”

_“Just me again. He believes it was you. His eyes have lit up and he’s smiling ear to ear and nodding. He’s giving me the portrait and trying to not let me pay. I’ve passed him a 50 euro note because I can see his shoes look quite worn and he wouldn’t be here this late if he didn’t have to be. I said that out of ear shot. I’ve got you now, rolled up in my other hand, so you're really here. There’s a guy whistling at me from across the street, and another guy hitting him on the arm for it. It’s like he can’t see my caricature boyfriend holding my hand…A group of girls, maybe 17 or 18 years old, all just turned and glared at him. They’re wearing too much glitter. And they’ve made too much effort to try and look as old as they want to look. One of them is nodding at me slightly and returning my smile. I’m at the crossing at Passeig de Colom now. People are looking at me because I’m describing everything, and I’m smiling back. They’re smiling too, now. I’m just trying to describe the moment and I think they get it. There’s a Fireblade pulled up on the roundabout, Repsol livery. He's fucked up the start, so maybe you’re not so far away after all. The lights went green for us and we’re walking now, and there’s a guy in a pedal taxi trying to convince me I’m tired enough to get a ride. I’m shaking my head, still walking, onto the walkway over the water. There are some people on a boat over to the left, sat on the deck drinking some wine and laughing. I’m walking past all the hawkers and their handbags, staring straight ahead now, there aren’t really enough people to be able to pass unnoticed. The slats are moving slightly like they do, reflections of the lights on the water beneath just about visible. It’s a bit colder down here, more of a breeze. I’m pulling your hoodie around me a bit more and I’ve made it down to the end. There’s a girl crying on the phone sat on the first bench. There’s a boy on the second, staring out at the water. The third one’s empty, and there’s a dropped ice cream melted in front of it, seagulls fascinated but too dumb to realize there’s nothing left for them. It’s just sweet soup now, guys. The fourth has a kid sat on it, and his mum is in front of him, bending down to fuss over one of his shoes. He’s pouting at her and trying to make life difficult. There’s still a fair amount of people sat outside at Tapa Tapa. There’s a couple on the bench at the very end down here. They’re sharing an ice cream that she’s holding. Looks like mint chocolate chip. She’s biting her lip slightly as he rolls his tongue over the ice cream, then sucking the top of it and looking at him with wide eyes. He’s raising his eyebrows and smirking, but in a good way, in the kind of way where you know they’ve done it before and they’ll do it again. They’ve leaned in for a kiss, and his hand is tangling in her hair. She’s smiling and trying to talk into his mouth, holding the cone away from them so they don’t drop it. He’s saying something now and she’s nodding and smiling, looking down and resting her forehead against his for a second. And then back to the ice cream. Mint chocolate chip it is, she’s saying that was a good choice. He’s nodding and settling down around her, arm pulling her in. They’re staring more out at the water now, or at the ice cream. His fingers are playing patterns across her back and she’s shivering under the touch.”_

“That’s going to be us.” The sound of his own voice makes him jump slightly, completely zoned out and hypnotized by the call and the voice gently explaining everything, suddenly aware again he’s in a quiet paddock in Mugello. 

_“Maybe it is. But lemon sorbet, please.”_

“Ok, lemon sorbet. Sounds good.”

_“Good. I’ve turned around again. Back towards the city. The hawkers seem to be packing up in the distance, running off. There’s a boat heading back in, but only small so I don’t think we’re going to get stopped for it. No, it’s gone. There’s a group of teenagers sat on the edge of the dry land threatening to throw each other in the water and taking pictures of themselves. The taxi guy is back, flirting more than ever. And there’s Little Pique again.”_

“Where?”

_“Over the road, they’re waiting on the opposite side. The mum recognizes me and she’s smiling at me again. She's incredibly beautiful. The daughter seems a bit quieter and she’s holding her hand properly now, in between mum and dad. The dad is trying to readjust how he’s holding Little Pique. One arm, impressive. He’s so asleep though. Little dead weight. Must have had a busy day. Maybe the princesa had too much sugar and that’s how she’s still awake. The mum seems to know I’m talking about them. I think she can tell it’s good. She’s looking up at the dad again, and he just caught it and smiled at her like he was asking what she was looking at, but very happy she was looking. She’s leaned up for a kiss, ruffling Little Pique’s hair on the way. The dad is looking down at his daughter and grinning, checking she’s ok. She looks tired now. Yeah, she is. Mum is taking Little Pique and the daughter is climbing onto her dad’s back for a piggy back. She’s grinning like an idiot. He’s cringing slightly at how violently she got on. Little Pique is awake a bit now, all bleary eyed and looking at his mama like 'Hey! You’re not the same face as I was looking at before, what the fuck, bro?!' And she’s grinning back like ‘No, you lightweight little champ, it’s mum time now, and they’ll be no more of this sleeping malarkey, making everyone else do the work.'_

_The lights have gone green again. We’re walking, and she’s still looking at me. I’m smiling, hopefully she can tell how much I love them. I think she can. We’re past each other now, I’m back on the proper pavement. I’m looking back, and Little Pique is pointing at me and grinning. And now I’m going to walk home.”_

_Wow._ “Can I join you?”

_“Not bored yet?”_

“Nope. So not bored. Let’s walk home. Little Pique sounds good.” _I hope you can’t tell how much this has got me._

_“You ok?”_

“Jeje. Was just thinking ‘I hope she can’t hear me sniffing and being pathetic…’ I was trying to be manly and tough but…Little Pique…” _And just you, and that picture._

_“Little Pique was a cutie, I think its fine. Even cuter than the real one.”_

“So we’re going to have lemon sorbet, yeah?”

_“Yeah, we’re going to be the bench couple, as soon as we can. Probably once it’s too cold for sorbet outside, but we can try.”_

“Ok. And what about Little Pique?”

_“Well I guess we'd better be careful what we call him because he could grow up into a big Pique and kick our asses.”_

“He could. Maybe before he does that, we could be them, too.”

 _“Maybe we could. I’m going to walk home now.”_

“Ok." _I love you._ "Take me with you.”


	11. Countdown

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much guys! ♥
> 
> Sorry if I fail at replying to comments atm, I will reply to all eventually, it's just harder at the moment! :)

Mila: Congratulations on your podium!! :D ♥

Marc: Thank you!! :) 

Mila: Apparently if you're free tomorrow night someone could possibly celebrate with you?? ;)

Marc: Oh reallllly :D?

Mila: Yes really. :) from about 5 o clock, I'm free

Marc: not anymore ;)

Marc: Andorra or do you want me to come down to you?

Mila: You mean Barcelona?

Marc: Yes. Want to stay in a hotel?

Mila: Honestly I shouldn't afford it before going away, pay day is post-tour!

Marc: Ok..I'm paying, 100%?! Hotel + room service + in-room movie. Sound good?

Mila: If we do it at your house it's free

Marc: It is, and I hope you're still coming up at the weekend.. [?] but that might be a bit more special. And it's easier for one night. And easier for me because I'll be back in Catalunya about 2pm after an event

Mila: I don't want to be that girl

Marc: Don't be ridiculous, I will spoil you everyday if you'll let me!

Mila: I won't let you :P are you sure?

Marc: I'm sure. Pleaaassseeee?

Mila: Ok. Where are you thinking?

Mila: Hello?

Mila: Marrrrccc...

Marc: Booked :)

Mila: Where?

Marc: You might be angry

Mila: Why...

Marc: Think it might be the most expensive suite in the city ;) W!

Mila: .........

Marc: You'll come round though, right? Knowing I'm lying in the bed naked waiting for you? 

Mila: .........

Marc: Don't be mean :P I'm well paid and it's exciting to have something worthwhile to spend it on

Marc: I have all my carpet now. I would like to burn my ass on someone else's. ;)

Mila: :P [ok I'm listening... ;)]

Marc: Plus expensive places like that are more anonymous [guessing you don't want to be seen]

Mila: I don't, and sorry ♥

Mila: And it sounds like heaven I just feel guilty

Marc: Don't feel guilty, please please ♥ would you like a Ferrari or a mansion or some diamonds? That can be arranged too ;)

Mila: No thanks, I think you're worth a lot more than all that 

Marc: See that's why you should never feel guilty. Got to disappear for a bit now, but is there any chance of a call later?

Mila: Yes :) I'm out with some friends, no Antoni, should be out late so call whenever ♥

Marc: Ok awesome :) I love you babe ♥

Mila: I love you too ♥

Marc: Every time you reply with that I kind of explode ♥

Mila: Every time you send it I'm the same ♥

Marc: Love you

Mila: Love you too

Marc: I love you

Mila: I love you too

Marc: Still alive?

Mila: No I exploded ;) :P Go! Talk later xxxx

Marc: Jeje ok. 

Marc: Love you... xxxxxxx

Mila: Ew :P ;) ♥

Mila: Feel too guilty: you too xxxxxxxx

 

*

Marc: I fell head over heels

Alex: Hadn't realised... :P 

Marc: She replies

Alex: ?

Marc: When I say I love her, she replies. How amazing is that?

Alex: I'm happy for you

Marc: it's real, you can stop panicking now

Alex: Not panicking, just wary

Marc: No need

Alex: Hmm

Marc: We're spending tomorrow blowing a lot of money on an expensive hotel in Barcelona, so...

Alex: Her idea?

Marc: Yeah :D

Marc: Well, no. Her idea was to meet tomorrow because she's free. My idea that I had to talk her into was the hotel, so don't think THAT please

Alex: So you know what I was thinking...

Marc: Yeah and I appreciate the thought, but can we be more positive please? I did it :)

Alex: You did it?

Marc: Repsol Honda contract, future perfect wife. Job done. ;)

Alex: Seriously I know it's all new and exciting but just take a deep breath and don't get so carried away

Marc: Where's the fun in that?

Alex: There's no fun in getting hurt though...

Marc: No there isn't. That happens though. Sometimes you get it wrong. Doesn't mean you go 5 seconds slower

Alex: This is different

Marc: It is, the risk is lower. ;) please. I know, I'm not stupid. But it's real, and it's making me so happy. Please be happy for me

Alex: Sorry I'm a bit pissed off after my race, too. I am so happy for you. So happy :)

Marc: Ok good :) thanks. And I know, but top 10 is still a good place to work from

Alex: Trying to remember that. Now going to sleep.

Marc: Home already?

Alex: Yup. Night!

Marc: Night!

Alex: :D ?

Marc: Better ;) 

*

"Hey."

_"Hello! It's my very cool boyfriend."_

"Drunk."

_"Lil bit yeah. And I'm staying at Lara's and I'm in her spare room allll alone and it would be great if YOU were here...so lonely..."_

"That would be pretty great. Did you have a good time?"

_"I did. I drank mojitos and we danced to norrrmal music in a normal club and uff so hot and sticky..."_

"You're killing me."

_"I'm completely naked."_

"Mila..."

_"Do you want to touch me?"_

"YES. But I can't."

_"Do you have clothes on?"_

"Yes."

_"Call me back when you're naked."_

*

"Ok."

_"You sound so happy."_

"I'm very frustrated."

_"Me too. Are you naked now?"_

"Yes..."

_"Me too, still...we should probably help each other out."_

"I feel like this is easier when you're drunk."

_"Maybe it is. Or maybe it's easier when you refuse to be embarassed..."_

"Maybe it is."

_"So talk to me. Tell me what you'd do to me. And I'll try my best to do it, and let you hear exactly how good it is. Turned on?"_

He looks down at the now tented sheet and bites his lip. "Painfully."

_"Where shall I start?"_

"Tr..trace your finger from your neck, over your collarbone and down your stomach..."

_"Hmm..."_

"Then over your hip..." _Jesus Christ._ "And between your legs..."

_"Hmm. Now wrap your hand around your cock. And close your eyes."_

"Wh-"

_"Close your eyes, and let me hear everything. What should I do next?"_

*

Marc: I'm here, there is a key waiting at the desk

Mila: I will be ten minutes

Marc: I've started the clock ;) :P

*

_Argghh._ The flash of nervous, terrified horror as he hears the door go is replaced immediately by warmth spreading through him as he sees the same grin on her face as has started to appear on his, bag thrown on the sofa and a _wow what a room_ choked out between kisses, before he's pinned her to the wall and her fingers are ripping his belt and jeans open, pulling them down roughly, boxers straight after, her underwear yanked down with as much urgency before they both groan into it as he buries himself, pausing a second before starting to move and feeling fingernails find his back under the fabric of his t shirt. _Fuck._

"Fuck, Marc." The noise after that as she moans at the ceiling makes him feel like he's about to fall over and topple them both, before her lips are back on his, pulling him in and slamming them back against the wall.

*

"We...we should...well...I should see the tour of the expensive room. Maybe. Now. Or soon. When I can breathe again." 

"Definitely. It's nice, but I like the naked tour of Mila better." To make the point he runs his hand over her back, before tracing her crack and smiling at the little _hmm_. "Don't you?"

"I like your tours of me and I like taking tours of you but my conscience says I should see the suite instead of just the wall and the carpet."

"Or we could just lie here forever and stare at the view..."

"We could. Or use the bed."

"We could use the bed. Less chance of injury."

"Jeje. Challenge accepted..."

"Jaja, right. Fine!" He locks eyes with her for a second, sharing something a bit more serious, before he gets to his feet and heads for the fridge, grabbing the champagne and opening it, back to her, not asking, turning back round to find her eyes still fixed on him, suddenly making him realise how naked they are. _Almost didn't even notice. Is that intimacy or Satan?_ "Champagne?"

"Nice."

"Turn over."

She does, him lying back down next to her, her hair fanned out and legs bent and together, waiting, before he grins at her and tips the bottle just enough to trickle the first few drops onto the middle of her chest, leaning down to catch them with his tongue as they start running over the skin, her hand tangling in his hair, before they both feel that change, maybe because it's now dark outside, or maybe because it will always go back to this, or maybe because of something as little as champagne, and get up, Marc pulling on boxers and grabbing a blanket off the sofa, Mila grabbing his discarded t shirt and underwear, and end up sat on the balcony, huddled together although the night is warm, passing the bottle between them like it's cheap cider, finally starting to catch up and chat and laugh, each moment of _oh you would have loved..._ or _you would have hated it..._ gone through, before he's wrapping his arm round her shoulders and letting the empty bottle roll away, echoing the sigh of satisfaction, and smiling into her hair. "How are you doing it. It's amazing magic."

"Hmm?"

"I wasn't...too bad. Before. Maybe sometimes should have been more gentlemanly...but...seriously. Here you are and...that's it."

"That's it. You don't have to-"

"When you were only 23..."

"Hmm Shakira quoting at me is a very good idea..."

"Well then I will use the big words in really bad English and hope you still love me."

"Ok..?" She sits up slightly, light from back inside the room catching her eyes, before he turns back and smiles, shy, aware that what's going to come out of his mouth would be cheesy as hell written in a teenage novel, before kind of shrugging through it and saying it in between kisses.

"I think it's 'my agnosticism turned into dust...'"

_Smooth, wonderful, incredible, heartbreakingly adorable bastard._ "Shaki?"

"Hmm?"

"Do you believe in destiny?"

"I do. As I did then, on the long, long ride back from the pole dancing club when it felt like I was on fire..."

"Test passed. Back to bed."

He nods into the kiss, gentler, arms going round her to pick her up, and ends up tangled in the sheets with her for a while, hands wandering with no urgency, air con soothing the remnants of the last few hours, before she moves on top of him again, silent question answered, and they start again.

_6 days left, and you're gone._

*

"You never answered, before..."

"Hmm?"

"About the weekend?"

"Oh, sorry. Yeah, I'm free from Friday morning until Monday morning."

"Would you come up for the whole time?"

"Is that an invitation?"

"Yes."

"Then yes, I would love to."

"Ok. We're going to Rufea on Friday. Want to come?"

"Filming?"

"Nope."

"Then yeah, that would be amazing."

"It would." He shifts slightly to reach the light to turn it off and murmurs into her hair. "So all weekend, and then..."

"I know. Don't want to think about it. Feels like it's counting down."

"Ok. Me neither. Love you."

"Love you too. Night."

He gives her a squeeze and moves back slightly on the pillow to get comfier, watching her in the low light, almost asleep already and soon enough completely gone, before he finds himself finally start to relax, sight breathtaking and still in that _oh my God she's actually here_ , before realising something else and feeling nerves bite back again.

_My dad will definitely be there. Mama will be expecting me for dinner... "And here is the pole dancer whose ex-boyfriend doesn't know about that detail yet..."_

He takes a deep breath and smiles at her as she murmurs and almost pouts in her sleep, before she ends up more face down and dragging him with her, making him try and stifle the giggle into the pillow.

_"She pouts in her sleep, and I don't think you'll ever have to meet anyone else."_


	12. Buenas Noches

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so so much for the responses, just logging in and seeing how much kudos etc went up made my life ♥ it makes such a difference! :)
> 
> I'll try and keep it coming, deal? :) ♥

Marc: Still coming tomorrow?

Mila: Was just about to text you and say I can't. I'm so sorry; I'm dying to see you in action but Antoni wants another rehearsal day and I kind of agree it's for the best. I'm nervous about this tour.

Marc: Oh, ok. :( but tomorrow night?

Mila: Saturday morning?

Marc: You leave on Monday...please?

Mila: It'll take me hours to drive up there

Marc: Could do Cervera?

Mila: Stay with your parents...?

Marc: Um, yeah...but they're out until late, I just found out. 

Mila: Is that a good idea?

Marc: Don't want to yet?

Mila: Not sure they'll want to meet me

Marc: Don't be stupid, I love you. That's more than enough reason why they will too. Please?

Mila: Seriously?

Marc: You're not planning on leaving me soon are you?

Mila: NO

Marc: So yes, please come and meet them :)

Mila: If you're very sure

Marc: I'm so sure, please please

Mila: Ok. I will probably make it up there by 630ish. Ok?

Marc: Yes, we'll be back about 5 so perfect. Thanks. Sorry was I too pushy?

Mila: Just pushy enough ;) :P I need to sleep now, baby. Sorry ♥

Marc: Can I just ask...are you still sharing a bed with him?

Mila: NO! Pff, be realistic. ♥ goodnight amor, see you tomorrow evening for the most nerve wracking thing in the world...

Marc: Oh ok :) and no don't be nervous, they'll love you. Like I do. Night xxxx

Mila: xxxxxx

*

"No Mila...?"

"Nope. Extra rehearsal day."

"Oh. Shame."

"Yes, shame. Don't..."

"Don't?"

"Don't...be all killjoy about it. It's shit and I hate it and she's with him. So just...don't."

"Ok, didn't even say anything."

"Hmm. Well..." He gets in, everything packed, and then looks over at his brother. "Just relax. I trust her."

"I'm sure he does, too."

"Ok seriously, can you just fucking stop it please? It's different. She loves me, I love her. I trust her."

"I'm sure he thought that a couple of years ago too."

"Right, I'm dead serious." He stops, only at the end of the street, and pulls the handbrake back on. "If this doesn't stop, I'm going to be seriously fucking annoyed about it. Ok?"

"Calm down I'm just trying-"

"Yeah I know. And I know, I _know_ that on paper it looks how you're seeing it. But it's not like that. And yeah I'm excited and whatever else, but I'm also the only one of us actually involved in the situation. So can we just accept that maybe I know what I'm fucking talking about, please?"

"Right, fine."

"At least try and lie better." He sets off again, huffing through it, and then looks back at him again. "You'll see. She's coming this weekend, and you'll see. Ok?"

"Ok."

"Thank you."

"Sorry."

"It's ok I just can't deal with it this weekend because she's leaving-"

"I know, I know. Sorry."

"Ok."

"Ok."

They stare out at opposite angles for a while before Marc indicates to turn off, checking Alex's face and nodding, starting to smile. "Coffee. Yeah?"

"Yes. I forgot the perks of going without dad."

"Oh yes. And I'm not even going to tell anyone if we upgrade coffee to second breakfast..."

"Ok yes second breakfast and I'm buying because..." He trails off, taking a bit of a breath, and then pats his brother on the shoulder as they roll to a stop. "...I'm sorry. I'm being a bit of a dick. You're going to miss her."

"I'm going to miss her. I'm almost about to buy flights to visit her every week, I'm going to fucking seriously miss her."

"I know. So, I'm sorry. But please don't order anything too expensive."

"Pff. Fuck you." He bumps shoulders with him as they reach the door, grinning and opening it and feeling the first bit of _oooh public and alone, please no one attack us_ , sharing a quick look and wordlessly heading for the cafe.

*

marcmarquez93: Amazing day in Rufea today, training for Montmelo! 

marcsegre17: Amazing day in Rufea today, wish you were here! ♥ 

*

Mila: Are they in?

Marc: No Secret Agent Mila they're not in. And I can see you on the other side of the street :P

Mila: I walked up to the door once but then I got terrified they'd answer

Marc: I'll be the one who answers, just take a deep breath and walk towards the animal magnetism... ;) :P

Mila: Ok I'm at the door...

Marc: I know, I'm stood behind it watching you text.

Mila: So...

Marc: Nobody knocked...

Mila: Bastard

"Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii." He opens the door pretty much as she knocks, grinning and feeling his chest constrict as she does in return, relief obvious on her face, and then smiles into the crook of her neck as he pushes the door shut with his foot, buried in a hug and standing there for a few seconds before they end up in a kiss.

"Who's here-"

"Just me. Just me and you until later-"

"Ok good-"

"I'm going to make love to you in my childhood bedroom now, ok?"

She grins into it, nodding and following him up the stairs in a tangle of limbs, before ending up in a weirdly empty room, not enough 'Marc' left for it to feel really like home, and finding her clothes peeled off to end up on a pile in the middle of it.

*

"You ok?"

"Hmm. Hungry, and a bit sore."

"Long day?

"Very long day." She nods and takes a deep breath, eyes closed for a second before they open and focus back on his. "I'm so tired baby I'm sorry-"

"Aww don't, it's ok. Sorry I wouldn't have-"

"Believe me I needed that too." She smiles lazily at him and pulls him into another kiss, sudden emotional outburst mostly gone, before snuggling down into his chest and starting to fake snore. "I'm so tired I need to go to sleep for a few weeks."

_Please feel free._ "Want food?"

"Hmm. Please."

"Ok, we'll do food then. And then we'll curl up on the sofa and not move another inch. Ok?"

"Perfect."

"Ok." He smiles into her hair, running his fingers over her back, before pulling away and getting out the bed, watching her pull herself upright, stretching and obviously very genuinely tired and creaky, and picks up her bra, walking back over. "Right help me out here, I don't know what I'm doing."

"Round the middle first."

"Right..." It takes a few attempts, clumsy and giggled through, that taking more time than the rest of the clothes combined, before she's fully clothed and yawning against a very naked Marc Marquez as he tries to put his own clothes back on and kind of half hold her up, before bending down and grinning, once dressed, pointing at his back. "Come on sleeping beauty, hop on."

"I would love to but I have my pride."

"You really don't, just get on me and let's go and cook. Aka put food in the oven that is already prepared."

"Seriously."

"Ok get the fuck on my back right now."

She does, relaxing into it straight away, and almost almost nods off before they're in the kitchen, before she's put on a chair, music is started, and the smell of food starts to wake her up. "I'm sorry I don't want to waste the time we have-"

"Don't worry, I can just watch you sleep. No problem."

"Funny."

"Would be if it was a joke, yeah." He looks over, just about finished with everything and about to put a plate in front of her, before he catches the look on her face and nods, slightly red, shrugging through it. "Sorry, sometimes I do that."

She looks down at the plate of food and then back up at him, tired smile taking over, before smiling wider and sighing contentedly, wrapping her hand round his knee under the table as he sits down next to her. "Ok me too so can't complain." _We're actually getting to the point where saying 'sometimes' is true. Not just 'once.'_

*

_Heaven. Heaven is this._ He runs his fingers through her hair again, subconscious little hmm echoing back to him in response, her completely asleep, before turning the TV down a bit more and shifting just enough to get an even better view. _And it's not even weird that you're here, it's just weird that you weren't before._ He leaves it a few more minutes, keeping his promise and watching, before finally managing to look back at the TV for a bit longer, watching the end of the show, whatever it is, before suddenly realising the time, and realising that one thing he absolutely did not do at any point in the last 24 hours. _FUCK._

"Hello?"

"H-hi..." _Fuck fuck fuck._ "In here." _Take the hint from my half whispering, pleasseeee._ He cringes slightly as they walk in, stopping dead next to each other at the scene, Marc having forgotten, with the changed plans and Julia not going to the track, that he probably should have mentioned the whole thing to them. _Fuck fuck fuck._ He smiles at them, reaction not negative, just surprised, and smiles, shy, nodding, before pressing his finger to his lips in a _shhhh_ , nodding down at his sleeping companion. "Shh, she's asleep. Long day."

"Hmm." Roser raises her eyebrows and nods, amused smile at how flustered he is. "Looks like it."

"Um...yeah. This is Mila, the..." _The what?_

"The...?"

"My girlfriend."

"Girlfriend?!"

"Shh!"

"Sorry."

"Yes, my girlfriend. Serious girlfriend. Sorry I forgot to tell you she was coming and I kind of forgot to confirm that we're...serious...but....yeah."

"Serious."

"Yeah."

"You know you can always tell us as much or as little as you want but it's things like this that worry me-"

"It's a bit complicated but I'll explain tomorrow, ok?"

"Ok. Why is she so tired?"

"Full day of rehearsal."

"Rehearsal?"

"Um, tango dancing." _Not pole today so not a lie, right?_ "She's a dancer and she's leaving for a tour on Monday."

"Oh." The two of them share a look, Marc's cheeks burning slightly at what he sees in it, before Mila murmurs again slightly and snuggles into him, leaving Julia and Roser watching their son looking down at her, expression on his face one they've never seen before, little smile and eyes sparking with affection, hand subconciously running through her hair, and they share another look, this one on the blissfully positive side of surprise. _Our baby has a baby._

"Could you, er...maybe go in the kitchen and let me wake her up and pretend you're not back?"

"Sorry, honey?"

"If she wakes up and knows you saw this she'll lose her mind. 'Meet' her tomorrow instead?"

"Um, yeah. Ok. You sure?"

"I'm sure. Please?" 

"Ok. No problem." She smiles at the expression on his face again, leaning down to plant a kiss in his hair, before her and Julia head for the kitchen, just about able to still hear the conversation in the living room, looking at each other and reading the same reactions to the same things.

_"Mila...baby...Mila....Wake up my love, it's bed time."_

_"Hmmm. Asleep."_

_"I know but we're on the sofa."_

_"Really?"_

_"Yeah, on the sofa in Cervera. Now we're going back to the bed, ok?"_

_"Hmm."_

_"Is that a yes?"_

_"Ysss. Please."_

_"Ok. You want me to carry you again?"_

_"You don't have to."_

_"I know."_

There are a couple of seconds of silence before they hear the TV click off.

_"Marc?"_

_"Hmm?"_

_"I can't believe I'm leaving on Monday."_

_"Don't."_

_"S-sorry. I...I just don't want to go and I'm going to miss you like hell. This is the worst last Friday ever and I've been asleep the whole time and I'm so sorry-"_

_"Hey shhh, shhh. It's been an amazing Friday, ok? I got to do dirt track with my brother, and then I came home to spend the rest of the night with you. Honestly, I could lie here forever with you and never get bored."_

_"For God's sake can you take a holiday from being perfect PLEASE, it's so boring-"_

_"Yeah the look in your eyes definitely says bored."_

_"Ok you got me. I just..."_ The voices lower to a whisper, Julia and Roser trying to pretend they aren't leaning nearer and straining to hear. _"I just love you. A lot. And tomorrow I'll do better at showing you."_

_"I love you too. And you don't have to do anything except be here, ok?"_

_"I do."_

_"Baby, it's me. Nothing to prove. Just relax, and let's go to sleep."_

_"Ok please carry me to bed and just make me feel like I can do this-"_

_"Always. Fasten your seatbelt. Arms and legs inside the carriage at all times..."_

_"Jeje well that could be a bit difficult."_

_"Arms and legs wrapped around me at all times?"_

_"Ok much easier..."_

The two of them look at each other, listening to their son and, apparently, serious girlfriend, and by the sounds of it a bit more than that, plod their way upstairs, before Julia pulls her into a hug and takes a deep, steadying breath, feeling the same thing he sees on his wife's face. _That was us._ "I think Marc fell in love."

"The way they are-"

"I know."

"He's the sweetest thing in the world." She pulls away, slightly teary and trying not to show it, before smiling and sniffing as he pulls her back in. "Did you hear that? He's-

"I know. Does that mean I was?"

"No, you still are."

"Ok." He smiles at her, leaning down into a kiss, before pulling her in again. "Just checking. I love you."

"I love you too."

They stand there for a few seconds, enjoying the moment of serenity, before both jumping slightly at the crash and gritting their teeth, knowing exactly what has just happened and sharing a slight eye roll in preparation, so used to it being the other way round but still just prepared enough for this way round.

_"FUCK! FUCKING DOOR."_

"Hello, Alex."

"Hiiii mama."

"Little bit drunk, honey?"

"Me?! No?! Just that door hates me. Fuck that door, mama. Fuck it. Fuck that door. I mean....FUCK it."

"Language, Alex."

"Pfff. Fine." He looks at her and shrugs, hands thrown in the air again in exasperation at the normally-not-a-big-issue politics of it, eyes wide and innocent and unamused, before repeating the phrase in Catalan. "Better?"

_Oh dear. Oh, no._ She looks at him, biting her lip and trying desperately not to laugh, before Julia starts to cackle next to her and she loses it, both leaning on each other and almost rolling round with it, before they have to watch him roll his eyes at them and flounce past into the kitchen, orange juice almost emptied and drunk out the bottle, giggles earning them another confused dirty look on his way to the stairs. _Yes, that's what I meant. Of course._

"Sleep well, freaks. Bona nit."

"Buenas noches."

"Fuck's sake make up your mind."

"Language, Alex!"

"Fine! Fucking BONA NIT!! OK?!"

They giggle at each other again once he's probably out of ear shot, slight residue of guilt but most definitely worth it, going back into another hug, one of those _I'm so proud of them, but what on Earth have we created_ moments.

"He's not going to be very well tomorrow."

"He's not, no."

*

"Arms up."

She complies and smiles up at the expression on his face as he frees her of her t shirt, jeans already gone, and then lets his fingers wander back round to undo her bra as his lips catch her into a kiss, managing to pull it off pretty quickly, then pushing her down into the sheets, body covering hers, and tracing a slow line of kisses down to her navel before hooking his fingers under each side of her underwear and tugging slightly, point made and hips moving towards him so he can pull them off, before they're thrown over the room and the path of kisses is retraced back up to her mouth, pulling the sheets around them and hitting the light off, smiling to himself as he hears the telltale breathing slowing and little murmurs, her drifting off to one last thought.

_You didn't even try to do anything. Completely naked and you just help me go to sleep._

"Night, then." He grins down at the subconscious _hmmphhh_ and gets himself comfy, conversation and situation from downstairs starting to replay in his mind, praying they didn't hear it all.

_Or at least if they heard some, maybe it made the point. But I'm sure they didn't hear a single word, right?_ He frowns into a half giggle as he hears Alex pound up the stairs to a _"Fucking BONA NIT!!!"_ , hoping there's an explanation, before taking a deep breath and picking up his phone.

*

@marcmarquez93: Thank you Friday, you were amazing. #bonanit #buenasnoches #goodnight #love


	13. A Minute Longer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title - Stereophonics. (such a great song)
> 
> It's not all in order but should make sense...? :/ :)
> 
> And thank you! I hope you enjoy it, and sorry ifor the break! :/ ♥

"Ok well..."

"Yup."

"You're not going to forget me-"

"That didn't go very well the last time-"

"You know what I mean."

"I do." She moves in closer and leans into him, face buried in his neck and breathing him in. "And I'm not even going to manage 10 minutes without thinking about you. Ok?"

"This is really bad timing."

"I know. I _know_." She pulls away again and smiles, eyes closed, as he presses a kiss to her forehead, feeling another full body fizz. "But if this is going to be a long term thing, we're going to have to get used to being apart."

"I know. I just...not _now._ "

 _Ok so no reaction to the long term?_ "You mean not yet." _Which I could have guessed just from the way you're looking at me, and everything else. But._

"Yeah I think I mean not yet." He nods and pulls her back in, swaying them on their feet for a few seconds, sad smile into her neck, and then finally his fingers are tangled in her hair for the last kiss. _Bye bye baby. I love you._

*

"Morning."

 _Urgh._ "Night night."

"Marc..."

"Oh God it's you..."

"Marc!"

"Call me again when the sun is down." He grins as he feels her poke him in the stomach, one eye cracking open to see a very much awake pole dancer staring back at him, eyebrows raised and amusedly unimpressed, before pouncing on her and pulling the sheets back over both of them, trapping her to the mattress and grinning evilly at the squeal and giggle. "You were warned..."

"Shhh!"

"Jeje." He lets his eyes wander down to her chest and then back, lip bitten and eyebrows wiggling, before giving up on it, the _shhh_ good advice, and settling for a slow, deliciously sloppy kiss as they collapse back into side by side and he pulls her in, voice lower and breath harder to find the next time he speaks. "Morning, my love."

 _Every. Single. Time._ "Say that again."

_"Morning, my love."_

She smiles, eyes closed, into the deep breath and arms going round her as he rests his chin on the top of her head, and then presses a kiss to his chest, relaxing into it as he does the same, conversation lazy as they steal the last few minutes of peace. "Marc."

"Hmm?"

"Are they going to like me?"

"No. They're going to love you."

"Despite my job."

"They know about the tango."

"And that was ok."

"Yes."

"And the pole?"

"It will be difficult but I think we found a good setup."

 _Dork._ "Ok." _Deep breath._ "Ok."

*

"I hear movement..." Julia smiles and raises his eyebrows at her across the table. "Hungover Alex or-"

"It's 9am."

"Point taken." He gets up again, over to the coffee machine, and makes them both another without asking, putting it down in front of her and putting his hands on her shoulders with a deep breath. "Well she's very beautiful."

"She is."

"And she seemed very nice and very much like she felt the same about him."

"She did."

"And she's a tango dancer."

"Hmm."

"Hmm?"

"Just hmm." She smiles round at him and then squeezes his hand, going back to reading the paper and smiling to herself as she senses him hovering, completely unsure of what to do, understandable in some ways and adorably hilarious in others. _Just sit back down and wait._ "Sit."

"Ok." He nods, and obeys.

*

"Marc maybe we shouldn't tell-"

"We're going to tell them. I mean...I think it'll be ok. If you want?" _Smooth._

 _Smooth._ "I'm...used to raised eyebrows I guess? But also, I know I'm good at it and I work hard and I...I don't know. It's..."

"Why are you so nervous, babe?" He raises his eyebrows and locks their eyes together, arms round her waist and preparing themselves to actually go downstairs. "I don't know what they'll say but they will care more who you are than what you do."

"Really-"

"Promise. I absolutely promise. I'm sensing something else-"

"My parents hate it."

"Ah."

"Yeah..."

"But then my parents hate too many things..."

"My parents don't. So...deep breath..." He smiles at the nervous smile and nods. "And let's do this." _Please?_

 _3, 2, 1..._

*

"Morning..."

"Morning."

"Morning..."

"Hello. Mila, isn't it?"

"Y-yeah..."

"It's lovely to meet you." She hugs the Roser hug back, then the Julia hug, and steals a glance at Marc's _see?_ face. "Would you like a coffee?" _Breathe._

*

"And Alex was on the bottom bunk, but I forgot. And I was a bit drunk...not much obviously...because I was sensible when I was 16..." He grins at the motherly _yeah right_ from across the table and looks back at Mila. "So I just kind of collapsed on him and he pushed me off and screamed like a tiny child-"

"Hey! What was I supposed to do-"

"Not scream like _that_! But anyway, he pushed me off but the ladder was in the way so I kind of ended up in a heap and hit a lot of things on the way down."

"Jejeje. He did. I did get my revenge."

"So...that's why now I post mean instagram videos-"

"I still owe you revenge for that-"

"Pfff just tryyyy and get that past Hector."

"That's very unfair. One day I'll have an even better PR guy...ok, no. One day I will steal Hector off you, and then we'll see who wins the internet war."

"Jeje. Steal Hector? He signed that contract in blood."

"I'm sure Jorge Lorenzo said that once-"

"Pfff. F-Shut up." Marc grins, Alex smirking at the almost _fuck off_ echoing across the dinner table, before squeezing Mila's knee under the table and smiling at her giggle. "Ok babe?"

"Hmm. Amazing, thanks. Enjoying the insight into Marc the fool-"

"Hey. Not _all_ my scars are from races; I thought this was a safe place where we could be honest-"

"Jeje. It is, baby. It is."

Julia looks at Roser, who is looking back at him, and they share a smile that Alex notes as they look back down at their food and take another forkful. _You like her. Maybe I'm being cynical._

"So...Mila...tour on Monday?"

She looks up at him, aware there's been more of an air of standoffishness from Alex more than anyone, and nods, Marc watching on and his hand squeezing her knee again under the table. "Yup."

"Excited?"

"Erm...not really."

"Because of Antoni." Marc glares at him, which Alex feels and ignores, before starting to relax as the reply comes back unaffected and clear.

"Yeah. Ideally I would like to do a world tour solo show that stops just outside all major racetracks..."

"Jaja, that would work pretty well."

"It would. And at least there's one. Or close enough."

"Hmm?"

"Indy."

"Oh, you have a show there?"

"Chicago, so not too far. Given the distance between Miami and Cervera..."

"True. That's good then." The younger brother smiles back at Marc as if to say _see? I'm not doing what you think I am._ "So is the tour just tango?"

"Yeah. We're the last act, again. Like the show you saw."

"And you want to do more tango?"

"I was meant to be a professional tango dancer, but then...I don't know. It's good, and it's fun, but for a start _he_ is my partner. Secondly, it's just not as much fun as...other stuff..." She looks back at Marc, aware of the slightly confused faces from Julia and Roser, and takes a deep breath, encouragement taken where it was given. "Pole dancing is a lot more fun, and it's well paid. It's more athletic, the music is louder, and it's more of a sport. I prefer that, and I love rehearsing and performing on my own, to be honest. I like the challenge of knowing the only person it relies on is you." _Don't look at them, don't look at them._ "So after the tour I think it will be easier to get a clean break from Antoni and do more pole. That's the plan, anyway. And then I'm in Barcelona more, too. And my plans depend on me and no one else."

"Pole dancing?!"

 _Arrgghh._ "Yeah. That's actually...how we met..."

Marc goes a bit red at the look on his mother's face and nods down at his plate, fingers now laced through Mila's under the table. "Um, Santi..."

"Jeje." Alex bites his lip and shrugs at the half-amused glare, sharing it. "I just like how you say it like the word 'Santi' explains everything."

"Kind of does."

"So you're a pole dancer. Or will be..."

"Yes, mama. A pole dancer. And before you judge-"

"Shh." She frowns at him and shakes her head, twinkle of amusement at the pout on his face. "I'm not going to judge if I don't need to. Where do you dance?"

"In Barcelona. I'm the, er...main show? At the club where Marc ended up with Santi. It's...well, I had reservations but I love it. It's how it's meant to be. It's not sleazy, and it's very expensive to get in, so you usually don't get creeps. And my boss is lovely, I get to decide what I wear and choreograph everything-"

"Woah woah woah. You never told me that?!"

She looks back at him and smiles. "Yeah?!"

"So you choose the outfits and design everything..." _Everything..._

"Yeah, babe. I do. Problem?" She smirks at him and raises her eyebrows. "Hmm?"

"No." He goes red again and smirks at the plate, turning into a full red faced grin as he takes another forkful. "No problem at all, absolutely no problem at all..."

"Good."

"But one day, if I maybe had suggestions-"

"Marc!" 

Her hand smacks him lightly on the arm as she says it, pink cheeked, Roser's tone of voice and facial expression perfectly mirroring hers as she echoes it, before Marc and Julia share a smirk and everyone takes another few quiet forkfuls; the other unanswered question next:

"Who's Antoni?"

*

" _Marc..._ " 

_Say it again._ He grins into the kiss, fingers digging into her wrists that he's pinned to the wall above her head with one hand, and moves the other again, teasing through the fabric and moving the kiss down her neck. "Hmm?"

"Please..."

"Please?"

"Please please please..."

"Eager..."

"Cervera was goooood..." Her voice rises as she says it, air gasped out as he suddenly pushes his hand under her underwear and her eyes close. "But..."

"But..." _I never knew it could be even better..._ "Hmm?" _...being the giver rather than reciever._

"BUT."

"But..." He moves his lips to press against her ear, one of her hands free to tangle in his hair, and drops his voice to a whisper. " _But I couldn't fuck you with my fingers in the kitchen..._ "

"Y-eah..." More a squeak. "Exxxxactllyyyy...and pleaseee..."

"Please?"

"Please fuck me, please."

"Please..."

" _Please._ "

"Ok, since you asked nicely...." He grins as her eyes open again, breathing slowing as he takes his hand back, fingers licked clean, and then there's a pile of clothing trailing back out to the living room, naked by the time they hit the sofa and his fingers digging into her hips as she guides herself onto him, both pausing forehead to forehead for another wet kiss before they start to move. _Don't leave. Please? Thanks._

*

"Um...Antoni is my ex-boyfriend." She thinks through the conversation earlier about how much to say - Marc adamant as much as she wanted to say was fine - and takes a deep breath. "He's my dance partner and coach, though. I was still with him when I met Marc."

"Oh." His mother raises her eyesbrows and casts a glance his way. "I see."

 _And now I want to say 'you know you meet someone and you know it's right and you leave the other one' but ultimately the truth being 'yeah and we fucked each other senseless in a bar and didn't care about the consequences' makes that a bit difficult. However much you are so, so right._ "If you want me to be honest, I still live with him. We were together until recently. And I know I probably shouldn't say all this, and I know I'm probably not doing very well in getting you to like me given I'm a pole dancer-"

"Babe, don't apologise." He looks up and swallows, a bit nervous but nothing too bad, trying to ignore Alex's face over the table. "Because you'd say you have to do what you think is right, wouldn't you? Not be unhappy just because you 'shouldn't' do something..."

"Well..." Roser takes a sip of wine and smiles faintly at the tone. "That always depends on the situation. But-"

"But this situation-"

"This situation seems quite simple. You love her."

Red cheeks. "Um, yeah..."

"And you love him?"

Marc feels his hand squeezed under the table and feels his chest do a little dance as the words come out. "Yes, I do..."

"So as long as no one did anything on purpose, not much can change that, can it?" She glances at Julia, nod of agreement added from him, and then looks back at Mila. "A pole dancer. Well, I certainly never imagined that."

 _What do I reply._ "Hmm..."

"Do you have videos? Of any of the show?"

 _Arggh._ "Um, yeah..."

"Could we see some?"

"Um, yeah. Of course." _That won't be embarassing at all._ "But the show is a bit...er...more..."

"Not for parents."

"Yeah. But...I do have some stuff from training that's more athletic and, er...better clothes..."

"More clothes." The older woman grins and let's herself quietly laugh along with Julia as the 3 youngsters go more and more pink. "Yes?"

"Yes."

"Then that sounds even better."

*

"And....open your eyes." He moves his hands, acting as a temporary blindfold, and motions at the table; candles and food waiting for them. "What do you think?"

"Wow. _Wow._ "

"Good?"

"Amazing." _Just amazing._ She looks at it for a few seconds, eyes welling up and lip bitten, as he scoots round her to stand in front of her and frown.

"Ok?"

"Hmm, y-yeah."

"Aww baby don't cry, don't cry. What??"

"Um...too amazing?"

"Awwwwwww." He wraps an arm round her again, this time from the other side, and brushes her hair behind her ear with the other. "Nothing is too amazing for you-"

"Don't be cheesy."

"Sorry." He grins and shrugs slightly like _you know by now I'm 93% cliche when I'm feeling pathetic_ , before pulling her in for a kiss and giving her a squeeze.

"I never had this before."

"Hmm?"

"I never thought people actually did this..."

"Did what?"

"Candles and everything...just...just for _me._ "

 _I never wanted to do it before._ "He never-"

"No, he never."

"Well there's another few waiting in the bathroom, so..."

"Marc?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you want to leave MotoGP and just follow me around and be my butler? I can probably pay you at _least_ 5 euros a day..."

"Jejeje. No? But since I am a MotoGP rider, I will be visiting you. And...well yeah, actually...sit down." He pulls her gently over to the table, pulling out the chair with an overly chivalrous flourish, bowing slightly with a giggle as she sits, before taking his seat opposite and pointing at the envelope in front of her. "Open it."

"You didn't spend-"

"Open it." He smirks and raises his eyebrows slightly, sip of wine as she prises it open, before taking a deep breath and feeling his heart rate amp up. _Please like it._

"Oh my God."

"Positive or negative."

"Positive...Are you serious?!"

"Yeah. If you want?"

"I want. God, I _want_."

"I won't cancel it then." He grins at the look on her face and nods. _Yeah sorry did it again..._ "Ok?"

"No." She shakes her head and gets up, over to his side of the table and yanking his chair out enough to angle him towards her, before climbing on and staring down at him, little moment of perfection as their eyes meet. "Incredible."

"Don't know if you can tell but I'm very excited..."

"Hmm I can tell. In more ways than one..." She grins and grinds down slightly, a bit cruel before dinner but definitely no complaints, and then lets the cheeky sparkle in both of them fade and presses a kiss into the crook of his neck, pulled in, arms around her properly to keep her stable. "Thank you. I didn't want to ask if you could-"

"I know. Ironically, you're a bad liar."

"Hmm well I had no practice until you showed up..."

"Good to know."

"Marc?"

"Hmm?"

"What if we get seen in public?"

"That's up to you. Although I don't think many people will recognise me in New York and Montreal."

"I don't think anyone would recognise me anywhere."

"I think..." He brushes some hair off her neck and looks back at her before nuzzling his lips close to her ear, voice low. "I'd recognise you in the middle of a million people."

She gives him a squeeze, nodding into his neck and making the point, before taking a breath and trying to stop the _I leave tomorrow I leave tomorrow_ swirling around them. "I think dinner is getting cold."

"I think I don't care."

"I think you need to be less nice to me."

"Ok, in that case I think you're an idiot..."

"Not starting yet though."

"Ok sorry..." He grins to himself as she ends up sat opposite him again, taking a sip of wine and then catching his eye, both letting that - summer MotoGP break and tour break coinciding perfectly to allow them some time together - sink in. _Maybe that's the first emergency light in the tunnel._

"Apology accepted."

"Easy."

"For you? Always."

"Shhhhhhhhh don't. I want dessert _now._ "

"Jeje. Well..."

"DON'T."

*

"We should...move...to the bed..." He slides his hands down her back until they've disappeared under the bubbles and lets them keep going until they're cupping her to him, fingertips digging in and making her nip his lip. "Otherwise we won't be clean..."

"Dirty anyway."

"True. But..."

"But?" She wraps her hand around him, feeling the effort go from his side of the kiss as his attention gets stolen, and leaves it until he's panting at her before stopping, getting out, and standing in front of him drying off as he tries groans and grits his teeth at the frustration. "Jeje. Eager...?"

"That's mean."

"Better come and get me then." She grins over her shoulder as she walks off back into the bedroom, sounds of water going everywhere as a MotoGP rider all but bullfights his way out of a full bath behind her, before two damp hands catch her round the waist, mouth attacking her neck until she turns round and they walk backwards towards the bed, mood changing on the way, aware, more than anything, of the time counting down, at least for now, and movements, eventually, slow and languid, fingers tracing gentle paths over each other sometimes followed by tongues, before they're lying in a blissful heap of stoned afterglow, staring at each other across the pillow in a conversation that, Marc realises after, isn't even out loud, before drifting off and waking up in an almost identical silhouette. 

*

"Just another minute..." He traps her between him and the back of the sofa again, stop off in Cervera on the way back to Barcelona, and shakes his head as she tries to untangle herself. "Please..."

"It's been 10."

"So let's make it 11."

"Well..." _Wow._ She smiles at the face in front of hers as she opens her eyes. "That seems a bit silly if AM12 is still current Moto3 champion..."

"12 it is."

"12 it is." They relax into another kiss, comfier than should be allowed, and finally pull apart when there's footsteps, ending up sat up but still cuddled up just in time to avoid complete embarrassment. "Hi."

"Oh I'm glad we caught you before you went." Roser smiles down and offers drinks, puppy dog eyes on Marc enough to convince the younger woman to stay yet another minute, before they're finally stood on the doorstep, other goodbyes done inside and just them once again.

"Ok well..."

"Yup."

"You're not going to forget me-"

"That didn't go very well the last time-"

"You know what I mean."

"I do." She moves in closer and leans into him, face buried in his neck and breathing him in. "And I'm not even going to manage 10 minutes without thinking about you. Ok?"

"This is really bad timing."

"I know. I _know_." She pulls away again and smiles, eyes closed, as he presses a kiss to her forehead, feeling another full body fizz. "But if this is going to be a long term thing, we're going to have to get used to being apart."

"I know. I just...not _now._ "

 _Ok so no reaction to the long term?_ "You mean not yet." _Which I could have guessed just from the way you're looking at me, and everything else. But._

"Yeah I think I mean not yet." He nods and pulls her back in, swaying them on their feet for a few seconds, sad smile into her neck, and then finally his fingers are tangled in her hair for the last kiss. _Bye bye baby. I love you._

"I'm going to miss you so much."

"Phone me. _Please._ Ok? I don't care how much it costs-"

"I can't ask you to pay-"

"You didn't. Just please, please talk to me."

"Ok."

"And have a good time. And kick some serious ass. And I will see you in New York."

"You will. And YOU be careful, and kick even more ass. Ok?"

"Ok. And it'll be like we never spent a month apart at all."

"Don't remind-"

"Sorry."

"I really have to go now-" She loses the words to another kiss, this one the kind that pulls the Earth off it's axes and boomerang's it around the galaxy, scale of those cliches growing but somehow needing to, before she's in the car watching him recede in the rearview mirror, pretending it's fine and then bursting into tears and lighting a cigarette as soon as she's round the corner. _Driving away from Marc Marquez must be high on the list of unthinkable mistakes. What a dick._

*

"Come on."

"Be there in a second-"

"Come on, sweetheart, come inside." She wraps an arm round him and starts to guide him back, having seen enough from inside the house to know quite how difficult he found it watching Mila drive away, before she stops as he grabs onto her and pulls himself into a hug. _Aww poor baby._ "It's ok, I know the first time is the hardest."

"A month."

"I know, I know. It's a long time. But it's a lot shorter than it could be."

"I know."

"I know you know."

"I know."

"I always know!"

"I know!" He sniffs and smiles into the hug for another few seconds before pulling away and nodding, letting himself be guided back inside and the smile starting to come back at the thought of that. _I know._

*

@marcmarquez93: Training hard for Montmelo, I want to win it for you!! #IAM93 pic.twitter.com/ojvdw

@marcsegre17: @baildoramila you know I mean YOU ♥

*

Marc: Let me know when you land. I love you. ♥

Mila: I love you too, thank you for this weekend. I felt like a princess but somehow that didn't annoy me ;) ♥

Marc: Queen of Hearts ♥

Mila: Jaja awww :) I will text you from every point of the journey, and call you from the hotel when I'm there. Ok?

Marc: Mila

Marc: Oops, I meant 'perfect' ;) jeje.

Marc: Sorry, cheeeeeese

Mila: Disgusting cheese :P ;)

Mila: But ♥

Marc: I can't think of any cheesy jokes

Mila: "Marc Marquez"

Marc: Ouuuccchhhhh

Mila: Jeje. Ok, going now. LOVE YOU. ♥

Marc: Same. Same. ♥


	14. Undercover "I Love You"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much! Sorry I always spam this box with neediness but you make such a difference so ♥ ;)
> 
> Enjoy!

Mila: We’ve landed. How was Rufea? 

Marc: Good thanks!! :D I kicked everyone’s ass so.. ;) how was the flight??

Mila: Ok. Lots of hours in a locked box with shit company for most of it. :/ But Lara got rid of him for a while so :)

Marc: You really mean it?

Mila: ??

Marc: I mean, you don’t have to pretend you don’t like him or anything. I understand he’s a big part of your life.

Mila: No, maybe one day we could be friends or something like it, but at the moment I just…I think I’m actually weirdly angry at him. I kind of feel like I’ve been taken for an idiot for too long and I can’t even yell at him and tell him

Marc: Well, you could… ;)

Mila: I could ;) and make it all worse. He’s still sometimes funny, still sometimes sweet. Always always putting himself first. Always trying to be in control. Always thinks he knows best. It’s a bit weird now I see that all the time. Sorry for the random deep conversation :/ ;)

Marc: It’s late here so it’s normal ;) :P 

Mila: Is that code for ‘I’m in bed’??

Marc: Yes. I’m in our bed. 

Mila: Jaja :P I know it’s literally been hours I think it just feels longer because I left the continent

Marc: Don’t remind me. How’s the weather?

Mila: Gorgeous. :D Like home pretty much, except everyone is American and you’re not here

Marc: Good. And no, I’m in our bed

Marc: _Media content in this message_

Mila: Hnnnggggg

Mila: _Media content in this message_

Mila: Does that help? ;) *mwah* I’m getting the hint :P

Marc: I’m not sure if you’re trying to be cruel or have mercy

Mila: Give me two seconds

Mila: _Media content in this message_

Mila: Mercy? Boobs are mercy, yeah?

Marc: Boobs are mercy. Argghhhhh mercy

Mila: Jeje. I would call you and purr at you down the phone but as you can see I’m in an American public toilet :/

Marc: Purr

Mila: You know, the noise when your tongue flicks my nipple

Mila: Before the growl when my tongue circles your cock…

Mila: And your hand tangles in my hair as I swallow you whole…

Mila: Purr.

Mila: It’s been quite a few minutes now baby, did you purr? ;)

Marc: Yes :P leave me alone you’re too amazing but too far away

Mila: Sleep well amor _Media content in this message_

Marc: Cruel now :P still in the toilet?!

Mila: Jaja nope, taxi. Just took a few pics to tide you over ;)

Marc: Best girlfriend ever

Mila: Pfff yeah I’m great here on tour with my ex who doesn’t really know that

Marc: Yes, you are. Not because you take half naked selfies for me to wank to, although I appreciate that ;)

Marc: Because you actually thought about it

Mila: Yes I was so romantic :P

Marc: I’m BEING NICE, BITCH

Mila: Jajajaja :O wash your mouth out, Marc Marquez!

Marc: I’ll wash yours out

Mila: Cheap shot

Marc: Face shot…

Mila: Fucking hell Marc. :P go to sleep!

Marc: Trying

Marc: So hard…

Mila: Seriously go to sleep you filthy boy

Marc: If you want me to sleep, definitely don’t talk to me like that :P

Mila: :P 

Marc: Tongue? Yes please.

Mila: I’ve never had a redder face in public

Marc: Jejejeje I’ve never had a better wank, so we’re even

Mila: What scales are you working on?! I’m on a loser here

Marc: Get off him :P ;)

Mila: I did but he keeps texting me

Marc: Fuck off

Mila: K bye

Marc: Come back

Marc: Milaaaaa

Marc: Amorrrr

Marc: Pleasseee…I’ve stopped being a terror, promise

Marc: Baby pleasseeee 

Marc: Mila don’t pleassee

Mila: in bed wasn’t the whole story was it? :P

Marc: Jeje ‘in our bed’, prologue ‘after some beer’

Mila: Knew it

Mila: Wondered what made you all un-blushing and fun

Marc: :O pfff I thought we’d gone past another barrier but you just think I’m drunk! 

Mila: You sound like you’re on a bad tv show. Go to sleep

Marc: I know I should but then I’d have to ask all the strippers to leave :/

Mila: Yeah, sure. You and your sickening devotion to me invited strippers over

Marc: Yup

Marc: [and glad you noticed how much I love you ♥ jeje]

Mila: See? Pathetic. ;) ♥

Marc: Ok they say they’ll leave if I pay now so I’ll do that

Mila: How many are there?

Marc: 93. All dudes. Massive cocks.

Mila: Jajajajajaja Marc, GO TO SLEEP.

Marc: Any chance I can call you?

Mila: He’s here, in the front seat.

Marc: I’m not expecting ‘purring’… ?? *puppy dog eyes*

Mila: Ok I will risk it if you promise not to say anything that will make me go ‘Marc!’ [aka like usual] :P

Marc: Ok first I’ll say this…that was fun and sorry if I was a bit crazy, but God I miss you already ♥

Mila: I know baby, I know. :/ ♥

Marc: Ok I’m going to call you…

“Hi mum.”

_“Hi baby girl …” Jeje._

“Yeah we’ve landed and we’re on the way to the hotel now. With Lara and Antoni.”

_“Say hi to him for me.”_

“No.”

_“Dare you.”_

“Yeah, the weather’s lovely.” _I’m going to hell._ “Antoni, my mum says hi.”

_“Hi Antoni.”_

“Hi.”

“He says hi.”

_“See we met each other and it all went smoothly.”_

“Marr…ma. We can talk about that tomorrow.”

_“Smooth.”_

“Yeah thanks the flight was fine. Slept through it a bit and I’m worried I won’t sleep too much tonight though…”

_“Know the feeling. Are you sharing rooms?”_

“Yup. But just that.”

_“And Lara is sharing with her partner?”_

“Yup. Dance partner.”

_“Ah ok, just that?”_

“Yeah, how it should be!”

_“How it will be?”_

“Already is, basically.”

_“Why did you make me your mum?”_

“Yeah it’s so much easier with just four of us. Because we’re really close.”

_“Ah. Undercover I love you…”_

“Exactly. So what have you been doing today?”

_“Well I won the first race, came second in the second but I’m pretty sure Alex cheated…then 3rd in the 3rd one and Tito almost killed me, and then won the last one, so good day really. Amazing weather, perfect. Got a Repsol thing with Dani tomorrow.”_

“Awesome. Sounds good. Tomorrow?”

_“Filming a new ad in a petrol station in Barcelona. Should be good…they’re usually pretty fun.”_

“Can’t wait to hear about it…”

_“Can’t wait to tell you about it.”_

“How’s grandma and grandad?”

_“Jajaja. Well…mama made Alex show her your profile on instagram so she stalked you. And me, a bit.”_

“And?”

_“Nothing bad. Maybe a bit wide eyed, but in a good way. I don’t think she understands how I ended up with you. My dad blushed more than me…and I blushed a lot…”_

“Ended up…?”

_“I mean she knows me and yes I am a MotoGP rider but also…you’re like a rockstar and I’m too shy to talk to anyone if they’re not talking about bikes? Especially beautiful dancers.”_

“Aww. What about that after show meeting?”

_“I’d had so much more to drink that you thought. But in the bar I didn’t drink much.”_

“Aww. Why?”

_“Because I was more relaxed already. Because you were sat on my lap all night and actually laughed at my jokes and…you know. I fell in love with you in 5 minutes…”_

“Aww. I doubt that though.”

_“I’m serious. I feel the same now just a thousand times more. But no, you know me now don’t you? So you know I’m not like a playboy or anything. Even before. So even talking to you was a bit terrifying.”_

“I do, and I know. Same. For obvious reasons…”

_“Jeje. Well I know, but she doesn’t. She thinks you’re cool and talented, and also a bit badass. She doesn’t know you’re a pussycat really.”_

_Bastard._ “That’s nice jaja. Is it accurate?”  
 _“Yeah, I think you’re very badass, in the best way. And a pussycat…”_

“Right.” _Cruel cruel cruel._

_“Does Lara know it’s me?”_

“Think so, yeah.”

_“So she’s on Team Marc?”_

“Definitely.”

_“So she’ll kill him if he needs killing…?”_

“No. But if there’s a problem I’ll make sure you’re the emergency contact…”

_“Ok. Good. Because I’m not kidding, unless it’s a race Sunday at 1pm I will come running…”_

“I know, and you know that if you did that I would kill you.” _Oops. Too casual._ “Sorry mum, you know what I mean…”

_“Jajaja don’t you normally threaten your mother?”_

“Surprisingly not. I’d better go now, we’re going to arrive soon.”

_“Ok. I should go to sleep, and sorry I called you a bitch.”_

“Jaja. Could have been worse!”

_“From experience?”_

“Yes.”

_“If I ever meet him I might punch him in the face.”_

“Don’t.”

_“Sorry. Just… you know.”_

“Yup, I do. Don’t worry about it, just laugh like I am doing. Deal?”

_“Face to face it’s easier to check you’re laughing not crying…”_

“I know. But one does one and one does the other.”

_“You mean me and him?”_

“Yup.”

_“Hopefully I’m the laugh.”_

“Everything. But all for good reasons.

_“Everything?”_

“Everything, promise.”

_“Ok. Yeah I’m falling asleep now but please be safe and have a good time, and call me in the morning if you can. Ok?”_

“Ok.”

_“I love you so much, Mila. Night.”_

_Aww my name._ “Night. Sleep well, I love you too.”

Marc: You missed it

Mila: ???

Marc: Let me know when you know what I mean

*

Mila: ‘Our bed’

Marc: Correct! Because I got you a key cut today and I will bring it to NY. Too early to live together I know but not too early to give you a key and beg you to stay as often as possible? ♥

Mila: Seriously?! 

Marc: You left your toothbrush so I took it as a sign ;)

Mila: It wasn’t

Marc: I know :P I don’t hear any complaints…

Mila: You won’t

Marc: I moved that cabinet in the hallway too

Mila: Jeje I don’t need it babyproofing :P I know I’m clumsy but :P

Mila: DON’T SAY IT

Marc: Don’t know what you mean ;) 

Marc: What do you mean everything? Because I’m worried you mean I’ve made you cry.

Mila: No, it’s just quite difficult to drive away from you. ♥

Marc: Oh. Ok ♥ well, not ok…but…it is what it is. Love you. Night. Xxxx

Mila: Night. Xxxx

*

Marc: Morning

Mila: Goodnight…

Marc: Jaja. Good first few hours?

Mila: Yes. Me and Lara went out :) lots of fun dancing :) not work dancing :) and Cubans :) 

Mila: The people not the cigars :D jejeje

Marc: Jaja well yeah :D never been to Miami

Mila: It’s cool

Mila: By which I mean HOT

Marc: Humid?

Mila: Sticky ;)

Marc: I’m eating breakfast with my mother

Mila: Lovely :D

Marc: :P she says hi

Mila: Hi Roser :) 

Marc: She’s smiling at how lovestruck I look

Mila: Well at least you’re self aware :P

Marc: One day it would be nice if you replied :P

Mila: If it makes you feel any better me and Lara are sharing the room tonight and she’s making vomiting motions because I’m obviously talking to you :P

Marc: Ok good

Mila: You need to meet her again properly. We should set her up with Alex, it would be hilarious

Marc: Oh dear…

Mila: Yeah he would be like a deer in the headlights :P there is no second layer with Lara

Marc: ??

Mila: Everything you see is what you get. Well, until you’ve known her about 20 years.

Marc: You’ve known her 20 years?

Mila: Yes. :) 

Marc: Ok I definitely need to meet her for the childhood stories jeje

Mila: Jaja :P NO. 

Marc: Doesn’t she have a boyfriend?

Mila: No and she just read some of this over my shoulder and she says Alex can have her number

Marc: You know he’s being too sensible about life at the moment

Mila: I know. ;) seriously though…

Marc: He’s 18!!!!

Mila: Yeah I don’t know if he’d recover jaja

Marc: Jajaja ok now I’M scared to meet her

Mila: She’s a good person but she’s one of those people who doesn’t want anyone to know that ;) [and she hit me for that]

Marc: Jajajaja

Mila: All red lipstick and a cold heart

Mila: She’s a bitch, I take it back. Don’t let Alex near her

Marc: Did she hit you again?

Mila: Yeah. Several times ;) :D

Marc: Jajaja. Do you trust her?

Mila: With my life

Marc: Then I’ll forward you Alex’s number. What you do with it is entireeelllyyy up to you ;)

Mila: Are you going to tell him?

Marc: No. ;)

Mila: Jajajajajajajajaja

*

X: Hi Alex. Remember me? xx

*

Alex: A random number just asked me by name if I remembered them.. :/

Marc: Shit. Girl?

Alex: Don’t know but it had kisses after it

Marc: Probably a girl then. Looks like your past is catching up with you. Jeje

Alex: What?! My…4 person past?!

Marc: 5, Termas de Rio Hondo

Alex: Does that count?

Marc: YES

Alex: Right. Well it’s in Catalan

Marc: Someone from round here then

Alex: No way couldn’t have guessed

*

X: Alex baby why aren’t you replying?

*

Alex: It called me baby

Marc: Shit. :/ you should reply

Alex: What should I say?

Marc: Maybe just say it’s not you

Alex: Right ok, sensible idea

Alex: For once

*

Marc: He’s worried :D jjajaja. He’s going to say it’s a wrong number, tell her to reply something about Friday because he was completely drunk and I bet he won’t remember

Mila: Jajajaja ok done :D

*

Alex: I think you have the wrong number

X: You gave it me on Friday? 

Alex: Not me

X: Alex you said you loved me this is mean. I know you were drunk but you gave me paddock passes! Does this mean Montmelo is off? :/ xxx miss you xxx

*

Alex: It says I said I loved her and gave her paddock passes

Marc: Fuck! What did you do on Friday?!

Alex: I DON’T KNOW

Marc: Seriously?! And you give me shit for Mila?!

Alex: WHAT DO I DO

*

Marc: He’s freaking out :D it’s amazing

Mila: Jejejejeje I feel slightly bad

Marc: I’ll take the balm

Marc: Jaja BLAME

*

Alex: I’m pretty sure you have the wrong number

X: Why won’t you admit it? xx

*

Mila: Any proof you can give us to convince him?

Marc: Ooh difficult. Er…he was wearing dark jeans and a blue alpinestars t shirt. 

Marc: Ooh but actually, he has a big bruise on his ribs atm from last week, tell her to tell him that jajajajaja

Mila: EVIL

Marc: Just a bit ;)

*

Alex: because it’s not true

X: How are your bruised ribs? Did you do ok at Rufea today? xx

*

Alex: FUCK FUCK FUCK

Marc: What?

Alex: It knows too much, what the fuck did I do on Friday

Marc: I don’t know!! What does she know?!

Alex: She knows I have bruised ribs and went to Rufea today WHAT IS GOING ON

Marc: Stay calm, I’m sure if you liked her then you could like her again. With her paddock passes.

Alex: Don’t. What the fuck am I going to do?

*

Marc: Ok stop now he’s probably crying

Mila: Jajajajjaja ok

*

Alex: Yeah thanks getting better. Honestly I’m sorry I don’t remember you…

X: Don’t worry about it Bambi, Marc says hi. You can stop panicking now.

Alex: What?!

X: Hi from Miami. I’m Lara. Nice to meet you. You have been Marc Marquez’d :P 

*

Alex: Don’t talk to me for a week

Marc: Peace :D I look forward to it

*

Marc: He says I can’t talk to him for a week

Mila: He might change his mind

Marc: ??

Mila: She sent him a picture ;)

*

Alex: Ok you’re samosahermoza or whatever from Instagram aren’t you?

Lara: Yes Bambi I am

Alex: Why Bambi

Lara: Doe eyes. ;)

*

Alex: I like you and Mila a lot

Marc: Jajajajajajaja


	15. Cherry Tree

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I've been so busy :/ :( ♥
> 
> And well...I would say 'trigger warning' and be a bit more specific but since I'm posting it with part 2 at the same time I think it's ok [and it's not....that.]
> 
> Thanks so much for the feedback on this, I hope 2 updates is a good reward ♥

Mila: Ok…so…we’re here ;) 

Marc: I’M HERE I’VE LANDED ARGGHHHHH :D

Marc: Might be a bit excited?? ;)

Mila: Couldn’t guess ;) from the texts and calls and instagram posts and EVERYTHING :P ♥

Mila: Honestly this can’t come soon enough I can’t believe you’re actually going to walk through that door ♥

Marc: I know. It feels like you went to war or something :/ ♥

Mila: Aww baby don’t, we were meant to be under the radar and I will cry

Marc: Honestly I don’t care about being seen if you don’t?!

Mila: I want to be with you until we’re grey, amor. So I’ll have to be ‘outed’ sometime

Marc: Are you serious? [I’m waiting for my bag… :D]

Mila: Yeah I’m serious! I’m going to be standing here and what you do is up to you

Marc: Then get ready to be physically assaulted

Mila: jajajajaja oh the romance :P are you sure?? Because this is serious and it’s not going to be fun.

Marc: I learnt an important lesson over Andorra. I’m never going to please everyone. And honestly I did care and I wanted to try :/ But now I have you…

“Hello?”

_“I realised if I’m going to kiss you like no one has kissed anyone ever in a few minutes, I should probably just stop being all undercover already and call you.”_

“Ah. Ok. I thought you were going to say you got refused entry or something…”

_“Refused entry. Jeje. That’s not going to be a problem is it?”_

“I’m really sad I’ve created this monster. I mean, I’m glad you’re more _sexually_ confident and less blushing, but there should be a line.”

_“Sorry…”_

“You’re not. I can hear the smile.”

_“Yeah I’m not.”_

“Jaja. I can’t wait to see you I seriously just…GOD. GET HERE NOW.”

_“I know I know I know. But are you sure?”_

“Yes. Are _you_?”

_“Yup. Fuck them. I wanted everyone to like me and I really almost got caught up in it but like I said, now I have you…and I’ll never please them all but I’m pretty sure I have a good chance of pleasing you….hopefully?”_

_Fuck._ She tries to bite her lip to stop it wobbling and is almost convinced it’s worked until she hears the next sentence said out loud. “Y-yeah. I think p-probably-“

_“Aww baby what did I do?! What did I say?!”_

“No, no no. You didn’t.”

_“Ok well I’m here and I’m walking through the door so…”_

He lets the phone move from his ear, shoved back in his pocket and call not yet cancelled, although that unimportant, as he sees her stood there, almost dropping his bag at the tidal wave of the moment, before he’s wrapped up in and around her, everyone in there turning to stare at the ferocity and the noise, most smiling, most not really seeing Marc Marquez or whatever this would be in El Prat or Barajas, just seeing a young couple who’ve obviously just missed each other a lot.

“I missed you so much.” He pulls his face just out of the crook of her neck to press his lips against her ear and lower his voice, feeling the squeeze and shiver in return, before they’re locked in another kiss and he picks her up and spins her around, grinning and getting a grin in return, until there’s an emotional face buried in his hoodie, shoulders shaking. “Hey, shhh. What’s wrong?”

No answer, he squeezes her back, swallowing the lump in his throat at starting to connect the dots of the slightly stressed or distant conversations over the last few days, ‘stress of the tour’ or ‘stress of being around him all the time’ always given as the reason, which had at times made him panic completely, before taking a deep breath and letting her hang onto him for a while, voice a low whisper in her ear, reaction enough to understand that it was absolutely nothing to do with how she felt about him. “Shhh, sh sh sh. I’m here, I’m here and whatever it is we’re going to deal with it, ok?”

“Hmm.”

“Please tell me what’s happened?”

She shakes her head and grabs on a bit longer, before pulling away enough to make teary eye contact and holding his face in her hands. “I’ve never been happier to see someone in my _life_.”

“Please tell me.”

She nods, planting a kiss for effect and accepting the calming hug as she takes a deep breath, before running her fingers under her eyes and picking his bag up, setting off and smiling back at the look on his face, complaint about the reverse chivalry dying on his lips as he sees the determined face and takes the hand he’s offered to follow her out to the taxi rank, squeezing her hand as they come to a stop and taking a deep breath. “You’re ok though.”

“Yeah.” She keeps staring straight ahead, as he is, for a few seconds, before turning back to look at him and locking eyes with him. “I’m ‘ok’. And now, I think I’m going to be fine.”

“Ok. So nothing happened to you.”

“Not exactly.”

“Antoni.”

“Yup.” Eyes scanning the view, not that great from Newark but still enough yellow cabs and freeway signs to remind them how far away from home they are, she squeezes his hand again and takes a deep breath. “Unless we find a replacement, I think the tour’s over.”

“Fuck. So you told-“

“Yup. I told him.”

“Did he hurt you-“

“No.”

“Ok…” _What the fuck happened._ “So he left?”

“Nope.”

“Please tell me-“

“He jumped off the George Washington Bridge.”


	16. "You too"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you like it?? :/ please let me know, and thank you ♥

Marc hears the words, lets them sink in and feels that cold shiver of dread go through him, before he looks back at her, breath short and eyes wide; her still staring resolutely straight ahead. “He…wh-“

“He’s in hospital. He’ll be ok.”

“Right.” _Fuck._ “Are you ok-“

“No.”

“Fuck, babe…I mean…sorry I don’t really know what to say, or do…I mean…do you want to go and see-“

“No.”

“Ok…” _Give me a clue._ “It’s ok if you do because I know he’s so important-“

“No. That’s not why I’m upset.”

_Ok._ “Oh…”

“I mean, obviously I’m shocked and upset. Mainly though I’m…actually…really _angry_.”

“Angry.” _Angry?_

“Yup. _Angry_. And r-really…” Her voice cracks slightly before she turns back to him and buries herself in another hug, having said it feeling a tiny bit of weight lift off her shoulders. “Really glad you’re here.”

“I’m here. You want to talk about it?”

“Later.”

“Ok.”

“Marc?”

“Hmm?”

“Empire State Building or Central Park?”

“You really-“

“Yeah.” She takes another deep breath and then smiles, all the way up to her eyes and further, watching him relax as he sees it. “I really want to just have the rest of the day with you, enjoying ourselves and not letting him win. Ok?”

_Not letting him win?!_ “Ok…”

“Don’t look so unsure…”

“I just don’t want you to feel like you have to-“

“Choose between whether you jump or not?”

_Fucking hell._ “That’s what-“

“‘If you don’t tell me you love me, I’m going to jump off this bridge.’”

“And you didn’t-“

“No, I didn’t. It’s up to him whether he jumps or not. I put the phone down, I waited for the call, and then I went to the hospital.” She looks back at him in the moment of silence and swallows, hard. “Does that make me an evil person?”

“Never.”

“Should I have lied.”

_How do I ever answer that._ “I don’t know.”

“When he calls you, again, with another _if this doesn’t happen I’m going to do this because I can’t live like this_ …how many times do you put up with that until you understand that it’s not about helping him help himself or supporting him, it’s about him controlling you.”

“You didn’t think he’d jump.”

“I wasn’t sure.” 

“But-“

“Yeah, I knew he might. And I’d put the phone down again.”

“Mila I don’t know-“

“I do. He doesn’t want to die. He’s not ill.”

“But he-“

“Ok, if you’ve got a chemical imbalance in your brain, how do I change that?”

“What?”

“If he’s ill, and he needs help. If he’s honestly got a problem. One that takes _innocent_ people. Why does it go away the next day when he wakes up next to me? And don’t…” She squeezes his hand again, “…say THAT. Because you know what I mean-“

“He’s done it before?”

“Yup.”

“And he’s always-“

“Yeah, he’s magically fine. I realised that last night. I was so scared of leaving him.” She takes in a few ragged breaths and gives him a sad smile before nodding at the taxi driver, nearing the front of the queue and surrendering Marc’s bag to him before they slide into the backseat and he pulls her back in. _See, something that’s real._ “I was so scared of leaving him because I thought he was ill. But he’s not. He just wanted me to be scared of leaving him.”

“But he jumped-“

“Yeah, he jumped." She feels the difference of that, the only other person than Lara who she can actually say this in front of without being terrified of how bad it sounds. "He’s got problems, but they’re not medical. They’re self-made. Actions have consequences."

"They do..."

"The consequences of his actions, and I don't mean _this_ , I mean everything, are that I don't love him and I wanted to leave him. I've done nothing wrong. I'm not spending my life forced to be with him just because I'm terrified."

_You're sounding more convinced._ "You shouldn't."

"Well good. I called the police. I told them what he told me and where he was. I went to check he was alive. That's enough. And now I plan on living my own life from now on, on my terms, whether I’m threatened with anything or not. Ok?”

"You know it's kind of worse for me to agree that your boyfriend...well, ex-boyfriend...you know..." _Should have been allowed to leap into the Hudson River._

“Oh definitely. You're pure evil.” She lets her hand wander under the fabric of his hoodie onto his stomach, nothing sexual really, more for the skin contact and reassuring warmth there, before leaning up into a cinematic kiss and relaxing again, watching Manhattan appear. “Evil Marc with the evil way he stole me. So evil. Falling in love with someone and making them feel like the center of the world. Surprise trips and carrying them up mountains…candlelit dinners and breathtaking hotel suites…incredible family…incredibly supportive, funny, and loved. Talking to me when you really have more important things to do. Keeping me going, making me laugh, and making me feel like I can do anything. You’re terrible.”

“Ok.” He leaves the silence for a couple of seconds before he presses his lips against her ear and laces their fingers together on his knee, horrible knot in his stomach dissolving. “I get it.” 

“Do you? Because my mother thought I was evil-“

“Well later, we’ll call mine.”

“You think-“

“I’m not even going to answer that.” He lets a bit of the cheek come back onto his face, seeing that mirrored on hers, both scrabbling for happy traction, his opinion obviously the difference between trusting herself and self-hatred, before nodding and leaning his forehead against hers, eyes closed. “Don’t let it get to you-“

She shakes her head to cut him off, tilting her face to peck him on the lips, before his phone starts to vibrate and he pulls it out, showing her who it is and raising his eyebrows in a silent question that she nods to, before they’re grinning at a grinning Roser and Julia, suddenly explosion of _¡hola!_ making the taxi driver glare at them in the rearview mirror. 

“Yes I’ve landed!” _Or maybe she’ll psychically call us._ “We’re in the taxi!” He nods and grins at their faces, turning the phone round to show them the view, normal conversation providing the perfect relief, Mila’s white knuckles grabbing onto his hand just out of shot the only thing giving away that it isn’t quite as perfect as it could have been. _But then nothing really is. But six wins, New York and you is pretty good._

It takes until they’re on their floor and almost at their room before they’re both really letting the good things sink in, hands held loosely instead of hanging on for dear life, key card slightly abused and sworn at until it works, bag pulled lazily into the room behind them before he’s staring out the window at the view and her hands are going round his waist from behind, nodding and squeezing. “I know. Cheesy but amazing, right?”

“Cheesy but amazing.”

“And I don’t think anyone has recognised you-“

“Nope. I mean, I’m sure there’ll be pictures but…” He trails off as it really starts to sink in, the moment, the person, the horrible precursor to it, and then finally the end result. Some guilt, some nerves, but mostly just overwhelmed in the most positive way. _You’re mine. You’re completely mine._ She seems to feel it, turning him round and nodding into a kiss, fingers teasing under the fabric of his hoodie and t shirt, before they’re relying on the amount of stories between them and any onlookers on the pavement to keep them from being observed, not really caring and collapsing in a messy heap on the bed, mouths leaving trails of moisture that flash cool under the air con, something snapping and everything else in the world forgotten in the sudden release of remembering each other. “Congratulations, you’re now officially Marc Marquez’s girlfriend.”

“Congratulations.” She does a better job of making the words intelligible, although the spank on his ass makes it apparent she heard every one of his, and nips his ear as she says it. “You have a pole-dancing, penniless, homeless girlfriend.”

“Umm…nope…” He pauses where he is, mouth hovering above her navel and eyes flashing dark as they look back up to meet hers. “I got you a key, remember-“

“And you said-“

“Awww.” He gives her the most sickenly arrongant wink and smile he can manage before burying his face in her stomach and blowing the wettest raspberry he can muster, the giggle and squeal of the reaction making him do it again just to hear them, face pulled back from its erotic travels and into a kiss before he repeats the words back to himself and let’s them sink in before he says them. “I didn’t want to scare you off. Again. But…” He kisses a line down her neck, mood going more serious again, and runs his fingers down her arm. “I think now maybe it’s ok to just ask you if you want to move in with me…” _God please say yes._ He feels his heart start to hammer, eye contact intense and silence more and more intimidating, before getting himself under control as he reads it before she says it. 

“Umm…” She bites her lip, everything perfectly acted except for the giveaway emotional eyes that no amount of effort will put out, and shrugs as though it’s not the second greatest thing that’s ever come out of his mouth. _The future. A thing worth focusing on. Right?_ “If you want. Wouldn’t be too bad.”

“Cool, ok.”

“Yup. Ok.”

“Yeah. Just, ok…” He smiles knowingly at her, nothing forgotten and clouds overhead heavy but resolutely ignored, pulling her bottom lip back in his teeth and letting his fingers wander between her legs, before smiling into the kiss in the crook of her neck as she bites his. _Ok…_ “I love you.”

“God I get it, just shut up about it…”

“Oh WELL.” That sends them giggling again, Marc rolling them over and pulling her on top to be able to return the favour of the spank from earlier, and then locks his arms behind her and nods into her hair as the response can’t be left out, fingertips digging in and kiss slowly turning copper, air con suddenly a lot more appreciated. _Six wins, New York, and "You too"._


	17. Who You Love

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title and writing soundtrack courtesy of John Mayer :) [said that before... ;)]
> 
> Thanks SO much ♥ I hope you like it!

Obviously, it wasn’t going to go away. He knew that much, but still, waking up to see her tangled in blankets on the balcony outside, cigarette smoke he knows she enjoys more than she tries to let on swirling into the sky above her, him tired enough after the week of training and too many late nights talking to have curled up as she did in the middle of the day, and her, it became more and more apparent, not having slept in any real way since it happened. It makes him sigh slightly into the sheets, the city now lit up even brighter than before and casting strange shadows into the room and over the bed. _I wish I could make it go away._ He watches for a few minutes, reading the movements in her hands and shoulders to know immediately the point where he has to get up and not worry about ruining the moment of peace, boxers pulled on in a hurry as he opens the door and steps out, momentary worry about the privacy lost completely as she moves to let him curl up under there with her, smoke blown in a specific direction away from them and leaning back against him.

“I-I’m really s-sorry.”

“You don’t-“

“No, I mean I sh…I should have left him before. I should have been braver sooner. Because this is bad. You know that, right? You know it’s going to be a fucking nightmare-“

“I don’t care. Honestly, I don’t care. If I’m with you, and I have my family and my team and I can race, I’m happy. I don’t care. So please don’t make it even a tiny bit worse for yourself thinking about that-“

“I don’t think you understand what it looks like.”

“I know what it looks like and I don’t care.” He leans a kiss down into her hair and smiles sadly to himself as she moves and sits between his legs, leaning back on his chest and wrapping them up tighter, although the dusk isn’t cold. He covers her hand with his around her, other one still holding the cigarette before he takes that and takes a drag, surprised little noise killed off by the low _I’m on holiday_ whispered into her hair through a sad smile, before it’s gone and he laces their fingers together, silence back for a while until she squeezes his hands and moves her head to the side as he nuzzles into her neck, words making the skin under his lips hum. “How long do you think it’s going to take?”

“Hmm?”

“For them to realise where I am and what’s happened.”

“I don’t know. Have you been online?”

“No. You?”

“No. So maybe it already happened…”

“Maybe it did.” He lets that sink in, gaze directed back at the city, before moving her off him to be able to get up and go back inside, relaxing slightly as there’s no panic from her about where he’s going, worried and unsure about how the next few days are going to play out for that, never having been around her, he realises in a scary little lightning bolt, for more than a few days at a time. He opens the mini bar and pulls out the champagne, unwrapping the top and pausing for a second to watch, something in the sight catching his breath before he realises what. _You’re just waiting._ And she is, sat up where she had been to allow him to move, and still there, not comfortable and relaxed, just sat waiting for him to come back so he can sit down where he was before. _And knowing I will._ He chews his lip slightly as he looks at her, everything so completely different to how it had been ‘before’, all of a sudden, everything split down the middle and priorities rearranged. _‘We’._ He walks back out and sits back where he had before, relaxing around each other again and holding up the bottle for her sight line to catch. _Everything is ‘we’ now._ “I don’t want to be insensitive, but I heard what you said. Ok? So if you don’t want to let him ‘win’, then we should celebrate somehow, right?”

She turns enough to just catch his eye, kiss going on longer than she’d intended and both relaxing into it, before a slender hand covers his around the neck of the bottle, nodding and squeezing, turning back to look at the view and leaning back again, waiting for him to open it and guiding it to her lips with the same hand, other holding another cigarette, shifting down slightly and letting her head lean back on his chest, angle now more facing the sky than the view, finally feeling some kind of peace for the first time in a while. “Marc?”

“Hmm?”

“You’re always going to think it’s worth it, right?”

“What?”

“With the things they’re going to write. You’re not going to regret choosing me over-“

“Hey. Don’t do that.” He lets her take another sip before putting the bottle down next to them with a dull clink and letting his hands go back round to rest on her stomach, words whispered low into her ear. “For a start, this isn’t a choice. I can’t turn this off and I wouldn’t want to. Secondly, I’m sure it looks great from the outside, and I love _fans_ , but I don’t like being famous. Really, at all. Because of things like this, and because I really miss having a normal life. But I’m not going to get that back anytime soon, if ever. So I either do everything weighed against whether it will make me popular or not, or I just live-“

“But this is bigger than that-“

“No it’s not. If you believe something you should believe it when you’re having a conversation like this or when you have a gun to your head. If you really think it’s true then the scale doesn’t matter-“

“I know, I just want you to be sure.”

“I’m sure.” He leans further in and nibbles her ear lobe before repeating it, it suddenly seeming to click for her, wall coming back down again and turning round to grab onto him and let go, champagne forgotten as he boosts her up and gets them back to the bed, staring at their reflection over the top of her head and wishing there was anything else he could do except this, which he knows, from the way her fingertips are digging into his back, is helping, but doesn’t feel like enough. He’s not sure how long it is they lie there in silence, everything running through his brain and knowing it’s doing the same in hers, but by the time he wakes up from the trance it’s fully dark and the shaft of light from the square below is bright enough to make him squint. _I’m sure. I’m sure I’d do anything, really. I’m sure by the time we get the train to Montreal, you’ll have a better memory of here._ “Mila?”

“Hmm?”

“Is he going to talk?”

“Talk?”

“Is he going to make it nasty in the press.”

_Oh shit._ “I, er…I don’t know. Somehow I’d never even thought about that.”

“Ok. And is there anything else?”

“Anything else..?”

“In the past, that might get dragged up.”

“Oh, er…” She shakes her head slightly into his chest and rearranges them to feel more surrounded, before managing to get her voice steadier and clearer, rust wearing off. “I don’t think so.”

“Ok.”

“Why?”

“Because I need to tell Emilio everything if we’re going to be properly prepared, ok?”

“Ok.” _Manager. Managers and tabloids and people screaming. I don’t even know half of your life._ “Marc?”

“Yeah?”

“I’m not going to find this easy.”

“I said we didn’t have to go public-“

“I know. But I think we do because I c-can’t…” _Come on._ “I can’t be alone-“

“No, I know.” He lets his fingers wander over her back, both relaxing a bit, taking some deep breaths and ending up forehead to forehead in a kiss. “I’m not going to leave you until you’re pushing me out the door yelling at me to give you some space, ok?”

“lvvooo.”

“Hmm?”

“Sorry.” She moves back enough to get eye contact and runs her finger over his cheekbone. _Wow._ “I just said ‘I love you…’”

“Nothing important then.” He watches her smile again, for the first time in a while, grinning back knowingly and planting a kiss on her forehead before sitting up and pulling her up with him, taking a second before nodding. _I’m not going to check. Unless you call me and tell me I’m under suspicion of murder by misunderstanding, I’m not going to check it._ “We're in New York. Food?”

“New York. Food. But first, shower. Please?”

“Knew there was a reason I’d bothered flying over here…”

She smiles back, appreciation for the light-heartedness glowing through the expression, before squealing slightly as he manhandles her over there, water colder than expected at first and making them both swear and squeak at each other, hair flattened and everything a little bit better, spluttering slightly at the mouthfuls of water they accidentally share through the kiss. _I’m sure._


	18. Wildfire

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title is John Mayer again ;) ... "a little bit of summer's what the whole year's all about" ... :)
> 
> Thanks so much ♥ honestly...I just hope you like it :)

“Ok…honestly…” She cocks her head to the side slightly and catches his eye in the mirror. “Do you really want to go to a fancy restaurant right now?”

 _Well…you said honestly.._ He knows the pause is already too long, little knowing smile spreading across both their faces, before he’s shaking his head and letting the expression change into more of an ‘eek.’ “Honestly…no?”

“Me neither…”

“I just want food that’s really bad for me in a really normal place where no one cares what we look like.”

“The title of my autobiography.”

He grins and lets himself laugh, shaking his head at the way she pokes her stomach with a slight eye roll, still an athlete regardless of the copious amounts of alcohol and cigarettes she’s admitted to consuming in the past few days. “Don’t even try it. You’re more ripped than me.”

“Hmm.” She narrows her eyes at him before moving to stand in front of him and unbutton the shirt he’s just put on, plans changed anyway. “Not sure, think we should check. For science.”

“Babe seriously I’m so hungry…”

“I knew I loved you. Normally you have to beg for them to eat you.” She locks eyes with him, one eyebrow raised, cheeks red and smirk maddeningly perfect, before bursting into giggles and kissing him on the end of the nose as he closes his eyes to take a deep breath, trying to avoid death by sexual arousal or death by embarrassment. 

“Seriously.”

“Jeje.” She wraps her arms round him, just a hug and relaxing into it for a second, before pulling away and nodding, patting his stomach with a serious face. “Ok. Shirt off, t shirt and jeans back on.”

“Ok.” He smiles and nods, starting on that and watching her move back away to the other end of the wardrobe away from the mirror, before reaching out to grab her hand and pull her back in, lips pressed against her ear. “But…that doesn’t mean I don’t think that dress is incredible.”

“I know.”

“Good. Never forget.”

“I won’t.” She smiles at him, sudden serious making the eye contact even more magnetic than usual, before nodding and squeezing his hand, back to the pile of her clothes and pulling a few things out to hold up, Marc pointing his opinion at each, before they’re melding into the madness of Times Square, undercover or that’s how it feels, arms linked and ending up wandering round with fast food until they’re regretting that and wandering into a bar, sharing a couple of drinks without a soul in the world looking at them except for when the occasional loud Spanish-ness cuts through the atmosphere around them, not focusing on anything but each other, getting on the hop on hop off bus on a whim and sitting at the front of the top, Mila snuggled into his side half-under the denim jacket, finally feeling freer and freer as the amount of energy in the world around them starts to sink in.

They get off at Fulton Ferry landing, somewhere on the to-do list anyway and skyline breathtaking, especially for people, however well-travelled, who grew up in the skyscraper-free Catalan countryside, standing there for a while leaning on the railing before sharing an ice cream, every cliché adored and smiled through, noses licked and kisses shared, passers by either melting with it or turning a jealous blind eye. _And nobody gives a damn who I am._ That’s really sunk in by the time he’s wrapped her eye-to-eye in his jacket with him and they’ve missed the last tourist bus back over to Manhattan by a long shot, night warm enough to not regret it at all, spending what ends up being about 10 minutes just talking in little facial expressions and few words, before they’re finding a cab back over and back in the hotel lobby, in the hotel bar, in their own booth and slouched down in the sofa seat, hands tangled between them, debating whether the Empire State Building should be done first in daylight or darkness, Marc’s fingers tracing patterns on her palm and nodding along through the beer that he’s half being forced to share, although the pout pure pantomime and particularly enjoying tipping it to her lips and watching her eyes widen in the desperate [and successful] attempts to not dribble, spill or any-other-abomination it down her front.

“Pff. Well…it’s 3am.”

“It is. It’s 3am…in a bar in New York City…with the love of my life.” She grins, slightly vacant on the alcohol, aware normally he’s the one that lets words like that run free with no reason needed, before smiling at the look on his face and squeezing his hand. “Seriously…”

“Shall we go to bed?”

“Mr Marquez! That’s very forward!”

He grins knowingly, little shrug, before shimmying out the booth and pulling her up with him, then bending slightly to pick her up, ignoring the eyes in the room that turn to them and grinning red faced down at her red faced grin until they’re in the lift and both back on their feet, slightly unsteady and fumbling their way down to the room and inside it, clothes left in a clumsy trail over to the bed as they just manage that without falling over, snuggling down under the covers, air con on high on purpose, and that moment of sharp focus coming back as the goodnights are exchanged, quieter now the surroundings are too, more intimate now the situation is too. “Goodnight.”

“Goodnight…”

“Going to sleep tonight?”

“YES.” She smiles back and accepts the peck on the lips, hand tangling in his hair to pull him in for a proper one before moving down and snuggling in. “I think definitely.”’

“Good.” He rests his chin on the top of her head, looking at the reflection in the window again, the difference a few hours have made absolutely incredible and suddenly making him choke up slightly, relief the main culprit. _I know you’re not ok but I think you will be._ “Mila?”

“Hmm?”

“You mean it?”

“What?”

“What you said in the bar.”

“I’ve said it before…”

“I know, I just-“

“Yes, I mean it.” She presses her lips against his chest and nods. _So much._ “Sorry I’m sometimes…I don’t know. I just…I’m still a bit nervous.”

“Nervous?”

 _Of being so terrifyingly honest._ “You don’t roll your eyes.”

 _Oh._ “No.” He shakes his head and bites his lip slightly, emotion back before moving further under the covers with her so they’re eye to eye. “No I don’t roll my eyes, especially when what I’m hearing is the best thing I can imagine.”

She nods back at him, just lit up enough for him to see her eyes well up, but very happily, and then closes her eyes and takes a deep breath, back to how they were again. “Night.”

“Night.” The pause is long, long enough for him to have done a full lap of emotions, before he suddenly realises and jumps slightly, words tumbling out before he has chance to worry if she’s already asleep. “Sorry I never said I feel the same.”

“Hmm?”

“Sorry, you were asleep.” _Great. ‘Will she be able to sleep?’ ‘I don’t know, but if I yell in her ear, that will help.’_ He cringes guiltily before feeling her start to shake slightly, panic fading into relief as he realises it’s a giggle, slowly joining in. “What?!”

“Nothing…”

“Sorry I just had to-“

“Now _that_ …” She grins to herself and gives him a squeeze, giggles changing back into that warm feeling she’d managed to find on the verge of sleep, “…is going to be the title of _your_ autobiography.”

 _Pff._ He makes that noise into her hair, grinning at himself in the reflection, and then nods and moves them both slightly with a shrug. “Well I guess it could be worse.”

“Yes you could be worse but – cheese alert – you definitely couldn’t be better.”

_Awwww-_

“Now shut the fuck up and let me sleep.”

 _And....it’s gone._ He grins again and finally manages to do that, knowing it’s maybe a bit for show because she’s certainly holding onto him pretty tight, and also knowing that it’s a necessary show in no way meant to hide anything, gradually relaxing. _I love you._ “Night, _amor_.” He feels her fingertips dig in a bit tighter and pulls the duvet up a bit more. _Yeah, I know._


	19. The Day We Caught The Train

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title - Ocean Colour Scene.
> 
> It's in reverse order in time...hope you like! Thank you ♥

“Marc.” _Sorry I don’t want to wake you up, but…_ “ _Marc_ …”

“Hmm?” There’s a soft groan from just in front of her, before she’s saying it again and his eyes are open and finding hers, just enough light to see each other and for him at least, that making him take a sharp breath and wake up. _Please…_ “I’m awake, I’m here. Ok?”

 _No._ The word doesn’t really get said, more kind of insinuated, before she’s buried her face in his chest and the well-controlled emotion of the past half hour – because it took a lot of deep breaths and bitten lips to finally feel like she had to wake him up – evaporates into tears. _I wish I was that person from the bar who made you laugh._ “S-sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry.” He tangles one hand in her hair to guide him into a salty kiss before it goes round her to pull her in, voice low and a bit rusty, clock showing 3.12am. _Don’t ever be sorry._ “Never. It’s ok.”

“It’s not ok.”

“What’s not ok, baby?”

“Everything.” _I mean,_ “Except you, and Canada.”

“Antoni.”

“He’s going to sell it.”

“What?”

“He’s going to sell everything he has on me and us, I’m sure.”

“That’s ok, we can take it.”

 _Maybe you can. I’m not sure I can. And I’m not sure I can watch you take it._ “Can we?”

“Yes.” The definite tone genuinely takes the panic down a few notches, for a few seconds at least. “We can do anything, if it depends on us. And I don’t care what they write, about anything. I don’t care, because we have a long time to prove them wrong…” _And we will._ “…and more than that, we can talk too. There’s two sides to every story.”

“I let him jump off a bridge.”

“Yeah, you did. And I think now, now I know everything, I would have done too. It’s not your responsibility and it never was.”

“But what if-“

“He’s not ill, baby. I promise. You didn’t push him off. He just tried to take you with him.”

 _He tried to take you with him._ “I-I’m s-sorry I h-had to w-wake y-you up I j-just-“

“Amor...” He slides down a bit further so they’re face to face, wanting to watch the words sink in and feeling it lift a little as they do. “Don’t be sorry. Ever.”

*

“Marc…” She smiles up at the border guards again and then down at the sleeping MotoGP champion in her lap, fingers brushing through his hair and lips close to his ear. “ _Marc._ ”

“Marc’s asleep.” The smirk through closed eyes is surprisingly shared by the two guys looking at them and so far patiently waiting. 

“I know, baby. Marc is also at the Canadian border and there’s some people who would like to see Marc’s passport.”

The way she says it, and the way the smirk fades until he’s sat up slightly red faced sharing a half-giggle with her as he pats his pockets down trying to find it, still doesn’t test their patience. “Oh.”

“Stand up.” He does, frowning, before she pulls a slightly worse for wear Spanish passport out the back pocket of his jeans. “He says ’I won’t forget where it is if I put it-‘”

“Yeah, ok ok. Point made.” He smiles at her through a half glare before mustering as much grown up not-a-passport-loser authority as possible and handing it over, ruse ruined slightly by the hand finding his and his feet scuffing the seats opposite like a lazy teenager.

“Reason for visiting Canada?”

 _Might propose. Would like to drive the track. No one knows who I am, including you._ “Holiday.”

“Have you ever been to Canada before?”

“No.”

“So why now?”

“Because it’s a good train journey from New York, and we were in New York.”

“Why were you in New York?”

“I was in a Tango show.”

“…and I don’t have another race until Indianapolis.”

The two guys exchange a look that’s mirrored by Marc and Mila.

“Race?”

“Yup.”

“You race what, cars?”

“No.” _Jejeje._ “Motorbikes.”

“Really.”

 _Incredulous, eh?_ “Yeah…”

“Circuits? Professionally? Like MotoGP?”

 _Oh so you’ve heard of it._ “Something like that.”

“You any good?”

“Not bad.” He grins at them and shrugs. “I do ok.”

“You make enough money to be travelling to Canada with your tango dancer, I guess?”

 _Well I’m not sure I own her, but ok._ “The tax is a bitch.”

“Really...”

 _Ok fine you win._ “About 3 million Euros last year, but you learn to live with it.” _Jeje._ “World Championships pay pretty well, so…”

“World Championships.”

“Four so far. How about you?”

The face in return, and the phone screen held up to him by his partner, obviously having googled the name, seem to signal they will be let into Canada, jealousy aside.

“Have a nice stay in Canada.”

“Thanks, we _will._.”

He waits until they’re gone to hold up his middle finger in their wake, before crumpling back down around his tango dancer. “Hi Canada, night night Canada.”

She smiles down, fingers back through his hair again, before taking a calming breath and staring out the window. _Other travellers on this train probably got drunk last night in a hostel._ She smiles again as he shifts slightly and finds her hand with his, before going back to staring outside, guilt coming back again. _But not us. I can’t sleep until I wake you up, then when I slept I know, I know you got up. And I’m so sorry._ “I’m sorry I kept you awake.”

“Nope. You didn’t.”

“Don’t lie.”

“Antoni kept me awake. Not your fault.”

*

Marc: Are you available?

Emilio: That’s quite formal! Yes I am. Ok? Holiday good?

Marc: Yeah not bad, but we need to talk

Emilio: Ok? Call when you want.

Marc: Now, then.

*

“Hey.”

_“Hello. You sure everything’s ok?”_

_Where do I start._ “Um, yeah…better now.”

_“Why are you whispering?”_

“Because balcony or not I don’t want to keep her awake, she only just got to sleep.” 

_“It’s 4am there, shit I didn’t realise. And she?!”_

And that makes him realise, suddenly, that really he’s not said as much as a word about it. Little things, yes. Same as with anyone. Nothing to say _hey so I met this girl…never have to meet another…_ “I fell in love.”

_“Oh dear! Jaja. Right…ok?”_

“I fell in love with the woman I want to spend the rest of my life with.” _And…_ “And she’s here in New York in a tango show. On tour. That’s why I’m here, I’m here with her. She’s a tango dancer, but she’s also a pole dancer. I met her in Barcelona before the start of the season. She had a boyfriend. She cheated on him with me. He was her dance partner. They were on tour together. She couldn’t leave him.” He thinks he hears the start of sympathy, Emilio thinking he’s been led on somehow, before he carries on and just ploughs through it. “She couldn’t leave him because of the tour, and because of what it would do to him. And I was worried what he would do to her. But then, she did. Because she says she woke up and he was, basically, emotionally abusive and controlling and…” He takes a deep breath as his voice cracks, not helped by the cigarette he hopes his manager can’t hear him smoking, before managing to carry on after a look back into the room at her finally peacefully asleep. “And she wants to be with me, and she is. And she has been for a while.”

_“Fucking hell.”_

“I know, I’m sorry I never said much.”

_“So this guy is going to be trouble?”_

“I…I don’t know. I think so. I just…” He feels the sudden emotion of it hit him, memory not real and wholly constructed but making him almost draw blood with his own fingernails as it hits, and tries to keep it in check before realising he can’t and hanging his head, imagining her staring at the phone, call disconnected, everything seeming too real. “He jumped off the George Washington Bridge. He’s alive, but he’s in hospital. The tour is over…we’re going to Montreal tomorrow on the train. Obviously the story hasn’t got out yet.”

_“God, I’m sorry. Are you ok?”_

“You’re sorry?”

_“That it’s not the fairytale you deserve, alright? It’s not your fault, from the sounds of it. Now calm down, take a deep breath, and give me a bit more information. Ok?”_

_Wow._ The relief of that – the mature and perfectly judged response that he’s not sure how he ever doubted – makes him bite back another sob. “Y-you didn’t h-hear the best b-bit..”

_“Right…”_

_Nobody’s heard the best bit except me._ “He made her _choose_.”

_“What?!”_

“He c-called her.” He grits his teeth and closes his eyes, not really having realised how angry he was until he’s saying it without her in ear shot, seething it through a clenched jaw. “He called her from the bridge, and he said he wouldn’t do it if she went back to h-him.”

_“Christ.”_

“Yeah.”

_“What did she-“_

“She put the phone down.”

There’s a long pause, Marc sniffing through it and trying to regain his composure, not very successfully, before it goes completely in tears of release and pure relief.

_“Sounds like I want to meet her…”_

“I th-think you do. She’s a-amazing.”

_“I would expect no less.”_

“Thank you. For this, I mean-”

_“Does anyone else know?”_

“No. Just you. I wanted to…I wanted to…I don’t know. She’s not ok and I don’t want to start conference calls-“

_“Ok, ok. Don’t worry. Right, I’m guessing you’ve not been very recognised?”_

“Nope.”

_“So what do you want to do? Wait? Or pre-empt it?”_

“Wait.”

_“Ok. How long?”_

“Until it breaks. Maybe a bit after that. I want the next four days without thinking about it. Is that ok?”

_“Yes, that’s ok. It’s not the best idea, but if you know that and you’re sure.”_

“I’m sure.”

_“Then ok, we can work on a plan.”_

“Ok. I’m going to turn my phone off now.”

_“I’m not sure about that…”_

“We’ll check if it’s out every so often on hers. But I’m turning it off. If it’s an emergency, Alex has her number. Ok?”

_Sounds like you decided. “Yes, ok. Please be careful.”_

“I will.”

_“Is she ok?”_

“Mila? Not really. I guess you can imagine…”

 _“I can’t. Tell her I said…something nice…yeah?”_ He smiles at the soft laugh and nods to himself. _Sorry I don’t know her. “That’s her name? Mila?”_

“Yeah. It’s short for Camila.”

_“Nice.”_

“Marc and Mila, goes well together don’t you think?”

_“I do…”_

“Good. Ok…thank you? So much, for this. I’m sorry-“

_“Don’t apologise, just take care of yourself and her.”_

“Ok. I will. You take care of my nightmare brother, please?”

_“Always trying…”_

“Jaja, ok. Good. Right well…I’ll see you at Indy…”

_“Is she coming with you?”_

“Yeah.”

_“Will she come to a lot of the races?”_

“I don’t really know. She will when we have kids, yeah. But at the moment I think it depends on her job and what she decides with that.” He doesn’t even realise what he’s said until he hears the little _oh_ from the other end of the line. _Yup._

_“You’re very serious, aren’t you?”_

“I, er...yeah. I bought a ring in June...”

_“Wow.”_

“That’s what I thought. It’s gorgeous. I don’t even know why I was there near the shop now, but I was and Alex was fucking around doing something and I was waiting, just looking in the window…and there it was.”

_“You going to use it?”_

“Sometime. I’m not in a rush. I don’t want to do it under grey clouds if you know what I mean. I don’t want it to seem like I’m doing it to make her feel better. I’m doing it because I mean it.”

_“I really need to meet her.”_

“You do.”

_“You know you don’t make life easy…”_

“I know, marrying a pole dancer with a crazy boyfriend…”

_“I think you know, but I’m very proud of you, you know?”_

_Aww._ “Not sure there’s much to be proud of right now, but thank you.”

_“Is she asleep?”_

“Yeah. Waited because I don’t really want her to hear. Took a while but I think it was worth it. It’s been 4 days and mostly amazing, but…she finally looks like she’s actually peaceful.“

_“Yeah, see?”_

“Is that not normal?”

_“It is for you, yeah. That's why I’m proud.”_

“Th-thank you.” _Don’t say nice things right now._ “Th-thank you so much. And I will see you at Indy for number 7 of 2015, yeah?”

_“You will.”_

He stares at the city for a while, lighting another and shrugging at the non-existent judgment aimed at him from no one, and leans back on the door, eventually turning round to look the other way, wanting to make doubly sure he's there if she does wake up, and wanting to check she still looks as untroubled as she did when he managed to gently pull himself away. _Think I'm definitely more proud of you._

*

"Morning..." _You don't look like you slept._

"Morning..." _You look like you slept._

"Canada."

"Ohhhh, Canada..." He smiles as she does, relief flooding him, and nods into a kiss, doing his best _yeah I had eight full hours, I'm wide awake..._ and pretty sure he's not pulled it off at all. "I love you, I love you, I love you."

 _You definitely didn't sleep._ "I love you too." _Sorry._


	20. Snapshot

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much, I hope you like it? Sorry it was so long! ♥

“Morning.” He smiles down at her, both sleeping finally at the same time and for almost the same time, as far as he’s aware, and yanks the duvet over the both of them to give them a nice cocoon from the sun they forgot to shut out, figuring that despite the lack of worded response, it’s meant to be ‘good morning’ in return, her fingers already running down his back and pulling him on top of her, both moaning into the kiss until the natural break and eye contact, breathing audible. “Is that a good morning?”

“Mayyyybeeeee.” She smiles up, coy in the extreme on purpose and for once loving that, before it melts slightly as they look at each other and the silent _so be honest, did you sleep and is the world a bit brighter by now_ is answered with a little nod, Marc smiling in response and lowering himself back into a kiss before letting his fingers wander down her front and tease, hips moving towards him in response until his lip is bitten and mouth echoing with a moan, kiss deepening and both smiling into it as her fingernails dig into his back and legs half wrap around him, soon pushing her head back into the pillow and eyes rolling back as he disobeys that and kisses from collarbone to crotch instead, hair tugged and pulled as his tongue circles her clit and fingers push inside, still teasing and that knowledge making her even needier, before they’re the other way up and he’s lost in the way she unravels on top of him, hands firmly planted on her ass and tongue teasing hers, both eventually collapsing in a breathless, satisfied heap for a few seconds. “Well…morning...definitely good now…”

“Jeje. Morning…” He lets his head loll to the side to grin at her, limbs too elastic for any kind of elegance, and ends up propped on his side next to her tracing little patterns on her stomach and as they wake up their voices and brains as well as bodies, little things he’s honestly no idea what he’d say they talked about if asked, ten minutes evaporating in a second before his stomach rumbles, loud enough to interrupt the conversation, and they both giggle. 

“Ok hint taken…”

“Wasn’t on purpose but yes, please food and NO!” He grins and whacks his hand over her mouth as he sees the cheeky spark appear, shaking his head and laughing at the attempt at wide-eyed innocence. _You’re still in there somewhere._ “Do _not_ make that joke!”

*

Alex: Hello

Marc: Hello

Alex: Sorry pressed send too early

Marc: Well then carry on…

Alex: Oh yeah, ok

Alex: Some stuff starting to appear now, only a few things [did you take a fan selfie?]

Marc: Yeah I did at Penn Station, so long way away now. Very nice kid, didn’t want to be a dick

Alex: Ok :) he mentioned the ‘girl you were with’

Marc: right ok..

Alex: So there’s a bit of stuff

Marc: Anyone realise it’s her?

Alex: Yeah. How are you going to do it?

Marc: Not really sure. I think just take a pic and tweet it all cheesy and romantic tbh ;) I don’t want to lie or seem like I’m trying to hide it

Alex: What does Mila think?

Marc: She liked room service for breakfast and she’s interested to know whether you want to meet Lara at Indy ;)

Alex: I’m mad at Lara right now so not sure and I’m glad you’re having more luxury than me :P

Alex: but genuinely? Emilio wants to know

Marc: You’re not being all pessimistic with him too are you? ;)

Alex: REAListic and no :P I was just worried for you!

Marc: I know, I know :) and ok well I’ll text you back in a few minutes after we talk, ok?

Alex: ok :) I just got home so no rush

Marc: #Timezonefail

Alex: Jaja yeah I’ve not been out all night ;)

Marc: Shame ;)

*

“Honestly, what do you think? Because you look terrified.”

 _Understatement._ “Thanks…”

“You know what I mean.”

“I am.”

“It’s just I feel like they’re going to go overboard on hunting you down if we don’t just say… hi…I’m in love with this amazing woman who you can spam at @bailadoramila…”

 _Breathtaking._ “Hmm.”

“Hmm?”

“Just…” She smiles and shrugs slightly, ruffling his hair on her way to the mirror to brush her hair, lazy day meaning they’ve still not left the room yet, locking eyes with him in the reflection and smiling back. “The way you’re so _nice_.”

“Well yeah I’m amazing-“

“Pff you ruined it.” She sticks out her tongue and then narrows her eyes in a fake glare as he does, before they both go back to smiling. “But I just mean…you say nice things all the time.”

“I say TRUE things all the time.” He wraps his arms round her from behind, gazes still locked in the mirror, and takes in a deep breath of her, eyes closing temporarily, before planting a kiss on her cheek, eyes still on hers. “Not my fault you make them all true.”

“You know one thing…”

“More than just one I hope…”

“Jaja…no, I mean one thing I’d never realised is how much I did stuff for other people. I mean, I like that because I like helping people, but now you actually give 50%-“

“Ok I was aiming for a hundred…”

“Always, right?”

“Always. But sorry I keep interrupting and I’m glad you feel like that. Because it really doesn’t feel like any effort at all.”

“I love you, you know.”

“Well I’d hope so because that carpet didn’t choose itself…”

“Hey, you said you liked it?!”

“I do! I just like that. I love that WE chose it and now it’s in OUR house. The first thing we committed to…” _Smooth segue, Marquez._

“Smooth.”

“Busted…”

“You really think you can’t just ask-“

“I know I can just ask. Anything.” He gives her a squeeze and nods at their reflections, mood a bit more serious again, before doing the kiss on the cheek again and smiling. _That’s us, really. You still standing, and me helping you along._ “I just want to check it’s not too much at the moment.”

“It’s not too much.”

“Good. Then you’re moving in, and this is…permanent.”

“Permanent. How romantic.”

He grins and fake glares at her expression in the mirror and pokes her slightly. “FOREVER. Until death do us part. Better?”

“Maybe…”

“Good.”

“Just ask.”

“What?”

“Don’t try that innocent face, Marquez. Spit it out.”

He tries to play it nonchalant for as long as possible until he’s elbowed and giggling trying to dodge it. “Right, fine! Marriage and kids.” _Oh my God oh my God._ He take a few deep breaths, panic now high on the agenda, not from himself, more from knowing it’s now officially out there in the world to be agreed on or crushed. “I mean, not now. Just checking we agree…”

“Well if permanent is permanent…”

“I see, too cowardly to say it. Ok…”

“Fuck off?” She grins, answer definitely terrifying but definitely positive, before turning round to face him properly and leaning into a kiss, hands wandering down into the back pockets of his jeans and nodding into it. “Yeah it’s terrifying. But yes I think it sounds like the best thing I’ve EVER ever been asked.”

“Ok, good.” _I think I’m flying._

“And we should probably talk about this-“

“Yeah sorry that got quite off topic…”

“Hands…”

“What?!”

“I can feel that, you know?!”

He makes a little sheepish face and then holds them up in front of him, still grinning in the lovestruck extreme. “Don’t know what you mean!”

“Don’t even. And fuck it, I’m tired already. You know?”

 _Yeah I’ve watched you not sleep._ “I know.”

“I don’t think anything could be worse than what already happened. And honestly I just want to shout it from the rooftops, I just…I was nervous enough before but now with everything else-“

“I know.” He nods and pulls her in for a hug, scent of the shampoo from her hair calming his own nerves. “I’m sorry it has to be like this unless we have to hide all the time.”

“Not your fault. I accept it and one day I’m sure it will seem normal to me. But at the moment…it’s going to be hard.”

“I know. But I think we’ll be fine. The sooner they know, the sooner they’ll get used to it. And the sooner we can get more peace again…”

“And the sooner you can learn where to put your hands in public…”

"We're not even-"

"Marc..."

 _Jejejejeje._ "Right, _fine_."

*

Marc: Ok we’re doing it. Just walking back to the hotel after eating. Selfie time…

Alex: Want me to retweet?

Marc: Up to you :)

Alex: Ok. Good luck!! Exciting and scary right?

Marc: Yup ;)!!

*

“Kiss me on the cheek again like in front of the mirror.”

“What?”

“It’s perfect.” She pulls out her phone, moving to how they were before, and holds it up, Marc wrapping round her like before and both smiling at the phone before he leans in and mirrors the moment from earlier, that he realises he thought of as the perfect self portrait of them, and the resulting picture leaves them both staring at the phone and then each other, eyes shining.

“You know the way you look at me always takes my breath away but-“

“I know.” He nods into another kiss, backing up to lean them against the nearest building slightly, and then lets them both take a deep breath. “You’re sure?”

“I’m sure.”

“Ok then. You know you can’t-“

“I don’t want to change my mind about _anything._ ”

“Ok, me neither.” He gets the photo from her, opens the app, composes the tweet for way too long for it to be casual, and then finally takes one last deep breath. “I think that’s my favourite photo ever.”

“Same.”

“Good.” One more kiss on the cheek for good measure. “Right, here we go..”

marcmarquez93: In Montreal to relax before Indy with @bailadoramila! I love you so much ♥ pic.twitter.com/obihd


	21. Nuit

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much ♥

“How bad is it?”

_“Not great. There are a lot of people happy for you. But then also a lot of…not so nice things.”_

“Well I guess I expected that, sadly.”

_“Yeah it must be terrible to be so desired…”_

“Jaja ok fair enough….”

_“Smiling again?”_

“I never stop for long, you know me…” 

_“I do know you. Real you.”_

“Yeah, ok ok. I know…honestly, it’s not too bad. For me anyway.”

_“And how is the beautiful dancer?”_

“Careful…”

_“Yes I’m sure it’s very likely she’d run off with me.”_

“Ok, true.”

_“I’m not sure what you mean by that…”_

“Yeah me neither, if I was ten years older…”

_“Right, enough. You win. How is she?”_

_Jaja._ “Um…not great actually. We had a couple of better days, but…pfff. I don’t know. I mean, I guess you can tell by the time…”

_“Yeah I thought as much. Same as before?”_

“Yeah. And honestly I’m not sure what to do…two more nights sleep before I have to get on a bike and I just…I have to be there. Not in the room or near or anything, she just won’t or can’t go to sleep without I’m _there._ And it takes hours, just…” _Holding her and waiting. Smooth._

_“I know you’re going to say no, but have you thought about maybe getting a separate-“_

“No.”

_“Ok. I knew you were going to say that, even from the look on your face in that picture.”_

“I know…I’m just…maybe a bit pathetic but-“

_“Not pathetic at all. It’s amazing, and I’m very happy for you. It’s just my job to worry.”_

“I know. Same.”

_“Has she talked about it much?”_

“Not really. Just a few things, nothing major. I don’t think that’s the problem, I just…I don’t know but I don’t know what to do.”

_“How is she in the day?”_

“Pretty good. There are a few moments but we get through them ok. It’s just nights. And when her phone rings.”

_“I can imagine. Has he tried to get in touch?”_

“No. Not as far as I know, anyway. Anything from him anywhere?”

_“Not yet.”_

“I guess that answers ‘do you think there will be’.”

_“Yes, unfortunately I think there will be. And Mila does too?”_

“Yeah.”

_“Still want to wait and see?”_

“Yeah. Ok?”

_“Whatever you want to do.”_

“You know that scares me.”

_“Well you are 22…”_

“I know! It’s crazy, everyone’s letting me do things for myself. Very weird.”

_“Well you seem to have decided.”_

“I have decided. It’s just weird that I didn’t have to say much and everyone just looked at us and went ‘yeah I see it.’ You’ve not even given me the whole ‘distraction and how it’s bad for your career’ chat…”

_“Distraction is bad for your career. But I think it’s a bit late now.”_

“You mean you know I wouldn’t leave her?”

_“I’d never make you try. But I doubt even before it got to this stage that being distracted by her NOT being there would have been any better.”_

“Yeah, true.”

_“And if you think I didn’t know about the other Instagrams-“_

“’Jejeje. Oops!”

_“You’re not sorry.”_

“Nope…”

_“I know. And that’s really not a problem. Besides, you’ve not had a race weekend like this yet.”_

“I know, and long term she’s good for me.” _Like I know that or what?_ “I have to get some sleep though, seriously. Any ideas?”

_“Sleep in the day for a bit, tomorrow.”_

“I don’t want to get out of whack.”

_“I know, but a couple of hours will probably help. Talk to her. I doubt she doesn’t know what’s happening.”_

“I don’t want her to know.”

_“Just…talk to her. See what happens. Ok?”_

“Ok. Yeah, you’re probably right.”

_“I think I am. And I’d better go now.”_

“Same. I’ll see you tomorrow, ok?”

_“Ok. I’ll be at the airport.”_

“Sure?”

_“Yes. You and her?”_

“Yup.”

_“Ok. I’ll sort everything out and see you tomorrow then. Ok?”_

“Perfect. Thank you.”

_“No problem. Look after yourself, and see you tomorrow.”_

“You too. Thanks Emilio. Bye…”

He looks back around, heading back inside and closing the door as quietly as he can, before going back to how they were before, eventually drifting off with his left arm draped around her, fingers playing little patterns in the small of her back and feeling his own calm return as she subconsciously nuzzles into him, smell of coconut shampoo and BOSS Nuit, he’s been informed, invading his nose. _Maybe tomorrow I will say something. But not tonight, and not in the morning when you’re ready to take on the world again._

“Marc?”

He’s unsure if he’s even heard it before he watches her eyes flutter open and lock on his. “Sorry did I-“

“No.” She smiles at him and closes her eyes again, pulling him in and relaxing, fingernails gently tracing down his back and voice a low whisper. “You didn’t wake me up. I just…” _Needed to check you were there? Even though I’m wrapped around you?_

“Ok. Dream?”

“Don’t remember it.”

“Good.”

“Marc?”

“Hmm?”

“I’m so terrified about tomorrow.”

“I know.” _Me too._ “And I meant it, you don’t have to come to the track-“

“I know, but I…” _Would rather anything and everything that could happen there than even an hour without you?_

“I know.”

“I want to be the girl from the bar again.”

“Hmm?”

“I don’t know what happened to me.” _Not now, not now. Come on._ “I don’t know what happened and I feel so stupid and weak and helpless and I don’t know what to do because you have more important things to deal with this weekend-“

“Hey, no. Come on.” He moves down to face to face again and runs his fingers through her hair as her eyes open again. _Because…there we go again. Wow._ “There’s nothing more important-“

“Than racing.”

“No, not anymore. Racing is my job. My favourite thing to do. But I love it more than everything else except you. Ok? If you need me, then that comes first. Every time.”

“Don’t say-“

“It’s true. It’s doesn’t affect how I’m going to be on track, I promise. It just means life’s a bit different.”

“Life’s a lot different.”

“I know. And I loved the girl in the bar even before she dragged me down a corridor and had her wicked way with me…”

“That was at least 40/60…”

_Smile._ “In my head, I was definitely all in.”

“Good.”

“I loved her. But she’s not even a tenth of you. She was a hot, funny dancer who was angry and forgetting about consequences for a while.”

“Yeah, what happened to her.”

“She didn’t go anywhere, babe. She’s still here, taking a break. Letting the really strong one take over for a while.”

“I’m not strong, I’m a mess.”

“It’s a mess but the mess isn’t you, I promise. And so you can’t sleep. And sometimes I know we have to spend a few minutes smiling a bit wider and not saying those things we’re trying to ignore. But it’s getting better, and it will keep getting better. And I love the person here, the laid bare version, much more than the show.”

“I don’t know why.”

“Well one day, you will. But for now, I think it’s just enough to accept it and accept that everyone has those moment or days or weeks when it’s just too much, and we’ll get through it. And we’ll be better than before.”

“Did you ever feel like-“

“I spent most of the winter in 2011 feeling a foot tall. I know. And now I’m here and I _won_ , and somehow you love me back. It definitely gets better.”

“You’re not bored-“

“The day you bore me is the day I die, _amor_. Just…let’s do this weekend. Go home. Move you in. Settle. And then, when there’s no echoes of it everywhere, let’s see how it all seems then. Ok?”

“Ok.” _Have all your dreams on a silver platter, carry it carefully…_ “Step by step, right?”

“Step by step.”

“So what’s the next one?”

“Indianapolis.”

“And how do I do that?”

“How we do that is we keep hold of each other’s hands, and we listen to Emilio.”

“Sounds pretty easy.”

“Yup…” _See, these moments where we smile a bit wider…_ “Step 1…?”

“Sleep?”

“Nope. Step 1 is promise me you want to come to the track and you're not just saying it, because I don’t know-“

“I’m coming to the track. I’m not running-“

“Ok.”

*

Alex: 20,000+ RTs

Marc: Fuuucckkk

Alex: Yeah. Seems more good than bad though

*

_More good than bad. And fuck._ He squeezes her hand as they walk out into the arrivals hall, Emilio easy enough to spot, despite the cacophony of flashes and yelled questions, feeling Mila squeeze his hand back and take a deep breath. _I know._

“Hey.”

“Ok let’s start walking and we can talk on the way, ok?”

“Ok. There’s so many people-“

“I tried to get in touch quicker but you didn’t answer.”

The Honda rider feels his heart hit the floor and takes a deep breath, woman to his right doing the same, another squeeze of their hands before the inevitable hits their ears.

“Antoni started tweeting…”


	22. Real

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's been a while, work is ruining everything a bit too much atm! 
> 
> I really hope you like this though, please please let me know ♥

The journey from the airport to the track is surreal, the two worlds colliding; one where he has a house and hikes up hills and cooks and dances around the kitchen and wonders if that house is the house they’re going to raise kids in, the other where he does 200 miles an hour on a MotoGP prototype in Repsol Honda colours, everything seeming like a strange dream. He’s aware of the grip on his hand more than anything else, thinking they did a good job of looking bulletproof, in public at least, but being able to read each other too well to not see the other side of the coin, which Emilio seems more than tuned in to. _But then you would be._

All in all, it could be worse. Antoni didn’t name him, yet, but the connections were laid bare as soon as the first this is what happened to me and she’s gone left the older dancer’s fingertips, the time crossover’s in mentions of Mila and the tweet from Marc more than enough to make the words pointless anyway. And it’s ok, Emilio talking calm sense and keeping them all calm, and then they’re back in the track and the interest in there, but the interest in Marc Marquez: Repsol Honda rider is the most important thing again. And it’s weird, so weird, to see her there and wrapped in his hoody waiting patiently with a few shared distant smiles across the room, just little moments to touch base and remind himself, and her, the ‘real’ world waiting for them back behind closed doors again. 

Marc: Didn’t realise it would take this long! Sorry. Where are you?

Mila: Still with Santi and the guys. :) do not apologise for being the best rider in the world ;) ♥

Marc: Never ;) [and hmm.. ] you getting along ok?

Mila: I think I love Santi

Marc: Santi is amazing.

Mila: Santi is my new best friend

Marc: Jaja awwww. Have you had a Santi hug yet?

Mila: ‘Yet’ jaja. No!! Is it good?

Marc: There are no words :D even when he’s the reason he’s hugging you, everything is suddenly fine ;)

Mila: Ah. PI black flag?

Marc: Yup. :/ 

Mila: :/ also how glad are you now that you’re not in the press conf?!

Marc: VERY!! Urgh. :/

Mila: Also your team are leaving now I spoke too soon!! :/ might go and call Lara 

Marc: Alex is coming to find you

Mila: Is that a threat xD

Marc: Jaja no, sorry! He just asked where you were!

Mila: Doesn’t he have my number?!

Marc: I think he’d find that a bit weird

Mila: Oh..?

Marc: well you’re not best friends…

Mila: Honestly my goal was run off with Alex but I guess you’ll do :P

Marc: Pfffffffffff

Mila: Does he not like me?

Marc: He likes you a lot. I think he’s just being too sensible and worried about me

Marc: We got in pretty deep pretty quick ;)

Mila: Hell yes we did

Marc: You’re ok, aren’t you?

Mila: Right now I’m more than ok. Not sure if you ever got this when you were 15 and here for the first time but I just walked past Valentino Rossi and ARGHHHHHHHHHHH

Marc: Jajajaja yeah I know what you mean ;) stay away from him! ;)

Mila: Jajajaja

Marc: I love how you know I’m very very joking

Mila: It’s because I know you know that there could be 93 Cristiano Ronaldos here and I’d still go home with you ;)

Marc: Booooo [but ♥ same… ;) jaja]

Mila: We didn’t have the football chat yet did we?

Marc: No….??

Mila: I like FCB lots :D

Marc: Som-hi Barça!!!!

Mila: Um… aúpa…

Marc: WHAT

Marc: NO

Marc: PLEASE GOD

Mila: I’m not even sorry, blame my dad.

Marc: EVERYTHING’S OFF, LEAVE NOW :P

Mila: Jejeje

Marc: Are you ok though? :)

Mila: YES, promise. I need to hold your hand again when we leave ;) but I’m happy right now so stop panicking and go back to your important stuff

Marc: This is the important stuff :P

Mila: Jaja I just saw you walk past, watch where you’re going

Marc: Becausseee…

“I’m coming to see you!!!” He sticks his head round the door and grins before pulling her into a hug and kiss, Alex awkwardly walking in after. Marc cups her face in his hands and stares. “To check you’re telling me the truth.”

“I am telling you the truth.” She smiles and kisses him on the end of the nose, still blown over by little gestures like these, before nodding and relaxing into another hug. “YOU though, have no right to talk about truth.”

“Wh-“

“You need some sleep, babe.” She nods and smiles slightly at the expression of _damn I was trying to be a superhero_ on his face. “I know, but Lara is coming tonight. So I’m going to sleep in her room, and you’re going to sleep before practice. Ok?”

“No.”

“Maybe it sounded like a question but it was actually orders.”

“Pfff wh-“

“Shhh.” She grins at the flustered aftermath, words stolen by another little kiss, before he obviously gives in slightly and nods.

“Ok. Maybe, I’ll see how it goes.”

“Ok.”

“I thought they were orders…”

“Just wondered if you’d follow them…”

“Jeje. Right well I’ll be back in a bit, ok? And we’ll have dinner.”

“Perfect.”

“And Alex is going to keep you company for a bit, ok?”

“Ok…” She smiles slightly, amused by the tone given the person in question is stood about 6 feet behind him, before fixing her eyes on Alex and raising her eyebrows. “Is that something you’ve been ordered to do?”

“No…”

_Aww he’s so nervous._ “Ok. Well it would be great to get to know you better…”

“S-same..”

“Good. Then yeah, that’s fine.”

Marc nods, happy with that and feeling the weird vibe, like someone’s set them up against their will, and steals one last kiss before beating a hasty retreat and leaving them staring at each other.

“So-“

“Look-“

They both laugh slightly, nervously, before Mila takes a deep breath and smiles, taking her chair again and pushing the opposite one out with her foot under the table, Alex taking it and seeming to start relaxing.

“Sorry. You first?”

“Ok.” She smiles and nods, another little breath and reminder ‘it’s only Alex’, before carrying on. “I was just going to say ‘Look, I understand why you think I’m a bad idea…”

“No.”

“No?”

“Not you, just…I was nervous? Because he’s…really trusting with people. To a fault. And it made me nervous.”

“Past tense?”

“Yup…”

“Ok, good. Thanks? I think. I promise I would love him the same whatever he did, you know?”

“I know, I’m realizing that.”

“Good. So you’re the cynical brother then?”

“Jeje, no? Just sometimes. Don’t want to see him get hurt.”

“Me neither.”

“Good.”

“So he’s naïve with trust and you’re naïve with women, right?” She watches the younger rider go red and giggles slightly, guilty but delicious, and squeezes his arm where it’s leaning on top of the table. “I’m joking, sorry.”

“I’m worried who your contact is…”

“Contact…”

“Inside job.”

“Ah. Lara.”

“Yup…”

“So you’re still…enjoying your communication?”

“Jeje something like that.”

“Can’t be that naïve then…”

“Hmm?”

“Well if you’ve not run away from her or called emergency services, I’m guessing you’re enjoying the perversion…”

“Jejeje.” He laughs it off slightly before they lock eyes and the complete knowing on Mila’s face sends him into another little red-faced giggle fit. “Um…I’ve been tempted a couple of times?”

“Same.”

“WHAT.”

“Jaja no not like that. Just sometimes, I feel like society would benefit if someone stepped in to control her.”

“The law seems a bit extreme.”

“That’s what she said…”

“Jeje.” Another moment where they look at each other, spark of amusement now having completely replaced the wariness in Alex’s eyes, before Mila takes another breath and leans forward slightly.

“Am I too much at the moment?”

_What?!_ “What do you mean?”

“For Marc. I, er…” _How do I put this._ “I’m used to dealing with stuff on my own, so I know I can. I don’t know what’s worse?”

“Worse?”

“Should I let him help – which he is doing, more than I ever thought anyone could, or should I try and keep it away from him?”

“I like how we have the conversation about your friend’s perversions…” Alex smiles slightly to himself as he looks into the can of Monster now somehow in his hand, before locking eyes with her as he takes a sip and sighs. “And then the deep emotional conversation…”

“Smooth segue.”

“Very.”

“Sorry, I wasn’t really sure how to broach it…”

“Me neither.”

“You want to talk about it, too?”

“Um, yeah? Want to know if I can do anything.” He watches her eyes defrost again, obviously having been expecting a _stop being such a burden_ speech and not about to get it, before smiling and managing to gain the courage to give her arm a squeeze. “And when we get back to Europe and you meet my mum again, she’s going to smother you.”

“Aww.”

_Actually…yeah._ “Your parents…do they know?”

“Know?”

“About Marc.”

“Not sure to be honest. I haven’t told them. I see them at Christmas and sometimes on my mum’s birthday.”

“Oh.”

“Hmm.”

“I’m sensing something bad..?”

“Wow.” She gives him a deadpan glare before shrugging slightly and nodding, smiling again. “Not great, but nevermind. I’ll just steal yours, it’s fine.”

“Jaja, feel free.”

“Where’s that legendary Marquez fighting spirit?!”

“It’s taking the day off. But…honestly, is there anything I can do?”

“No, but thank you. I just need to stop being pathetic and remind myself there are more important things.”

“Um…I don’t think it’s pathetic. And I think people are more important than racing.”

“I’m hardly at death’s door though.”

“Not the point. Plus the better you are, the better he is. Right?”

“I guess. I don’t think we really know that yet…”

“I think we do.”

“Oh?”

“He was always happy but honestly since he met you…”

“Awww.”

“Urgh DON’T.”

“Sorry…”

“No, it’s ok. Sorry. I…to go back to the question before, I don’t know what’s better. But I don’t think he’ll let you sleep alone.”

“Would it be better?”

“Honestly? I don’t know.” The younger Marquez crushes the empty can and throws it across the room to within a small enough radius of the bin to be proud enough for a little smile, before fixing his eyes back on hers and shrugging. “Is it that way round?”

“Hmm?”

“You sure you’re the one who can’t sleep alone?”

_Shit._ “I…” _I didn’t even consider that._ “I didn’t even think about that.”

_I know._

*

“Good food.”

“Yes, very good food. And good company.” She smiles and turns her head to press a kiss to his shoulder, leaning on it in the lift up to the room, and lets out a little contented sigh as his fingers lace through hers.

“I know.”

“Everyone’s so nice.”

“They are. But not boring.”

“Never.” She shakes her head slightly and squeezes his hand as they walk out into their corridor, everything suddenly quiet and calm as they make it to the door and then through it, low lighting in the room instantly making the mood change even more and leaving them stood opposite each other staring, knowing, little glint of something in their eyes.

“You’re not in Lara’s room.”

“No.”

“You take your orders back then?”

“No. I just feel ok, and I feel like I can sleep ok. And for the first time in a lot of days, I’ve not seen or heard him.”

“Seen or he-“

“When I close my eyes.” She smiles at the little flash of relief and moves closer, eyes wandering down his cheekbone and jaw to the top button of the shirt he’s wearing, fingers pinching it to undo it a few seconds later and eyes going back up to find his. “Today has been an unhaunted day.”

“Good.”

“Very good…” She lets his smile infect her before nodding and snapping the button open, gazes still locked, the noise of the subsequent buttons rustling undone the only one in the room, and running her fingers down the line of bare skin now revealed before his arms go round her to pull her in and they stand there for a while, conversation slower and quieter.

“Shall I tell you a secret?”

“Hmm.”

“I’m very relieved, more for me than you.”

“I know.”

“You don’t leave me, either, ok? That’s the deal.”

“Leave you?”

“This weekend. For a while. Even if we’re tired out of our minds or trying to keep everything together, we do it together. Ok?”

“Ok.”

“Ok.” He nods into his hair slightly, little squeeze before pulling away to get eye contact back, and then leaning in for a kiss as her hands start to pull his shirt off and then end up in the air as he mirrors her, both left in hastily but subsequently elegantly shed underwear by the time they reach the bed, Marc pausing to hover above her for a few seconds and brushing the hair behind her ear, eyes searching. “You feel it, don’t you?”

“Feel it.”

“When we look at each other-“

“Oh. _Yes_ , I feel it.” She pulls him down into a kiss, both moaning softly and her legs going round him, before nodding and ending up forehead to forehead, eyes closed and voice a whisper. “I feel it, all the time. And it’s never going to go away.”

“You promise-“

“I promise you absolutely, for as long as I live, that it will never, _ever_ go away.”

He nods again, steals another little kiss, and then relaxes slightly onto her, pause for a very good reason, heart hammering and moment just clicking. “I wanted to do this with a big gesture.”

“What-“

“But I don’t think we need big gestures now, we need more moments like this. So I’ll do it now, and say I promise I already bought one. Ok?”

“Marc what are you-“

“I’m going to propose to you. Ok?”

“Oh.” _Oh my God._

_Oh, she says._ “Funny how…sometimes…you just go out to a pole dancing club by accident and meet the love of your life. And maybe I’ve not had many, but I don’t ever want another one. And it seems crazy because we’ve not even known each other a year, but I don’t care anymore. I don’t care what people say, I don’t care what people think they know…I don’t care about anything that they’re going to write. Because look what I have.” He kisses a line down her jaw and then they’re both finally eye to eye again, eyes open. “They’re going to say you’re a cheat and whore, and I’m going to be the evil guy who stole you. It’s not going to be real for them, because I have my picture in magazines and that means I’m not real anymore either. But I am real, and I know you love _me_ , more than anything else about me. And I think it’s such a shame...” He lowers his voice further and presses his lips to her ear, breath hot and her hand ruffling through his hair. “It’s such a shame they’re missing out on who you are because they want to sell newspapers to people who we’re never going to meet. It’s a shame that the world doesn’t look for the good in people. I think you’re too good for this world, really-“

“Marc-“

“Don’t cry at me or I will.” He smiles slightly and drops a kiss onto the end of her nose, both a bit glassy eyed. “I think you’re too good for this world, but still you’re here, and somehow you found me. And when everything’s come together like that, it can’t be wrong. When you look at me like that, it can’t be wrong. It just can’t be wrong. So maybe you’re not meant to be trapped on Earth with us, but I’m glad you are. And if you’re going to be around as long as I am, I can’t think I’d want to spend a day with anyone else. So…I want to know if you’ll marry me. I love you. Please.”

_Please._ “I love you too.”

“Is that a –“

“ _Yes._ ” She nods into the kiss, cheeks a little damp on both and intensity suddenly back up to _fire_ , before stealing enough breath for the cheesy but very much felt response. “It’s not me who fell from the sky though-“

“Yes.” _I like that word._ “Yes it is.”

They both smile into it again, tears still there and both more and more breathless until they’re eye to eye and lacing their fingers together as he pushes inside, everything slow and rhythm the same natural one they found in Andorra the first time, collapsing together a while later and staying there for far too long tangled up and stuck together, Marc’s face buried in the crook of her neck, fingertips the only things moving and reminding that it’s real. _Because it is real. And it’s official._ “I’ll get the ring out my bag tomorrow-“

_I can't believe you already have one._ “You will, and I will wear it.”

He smiles into her skin and nods, final last vestige of worry about that gone. “Good.”


	23. "Love Rat Marquez and the Pole Dancer"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the break ♥
> 
> MotoGP is back :) and then that news about Dani. :/ Honestly it was meant to be him here not Santi, but that's a bit raw right now so :/
> 
> I hope you like it...that is why I write it ♥ thank you more than you probably realise :)

Marc was fastest in both sessions, and the storm that from outside the track seemed too daunting, from the inside seemed ok. It was business as usual, Dani didn’t seem to give a shit and especially didn’t after Marc explained, which he felt he had to, if for no other reason than still looking up to his teammate enough to need him to know that it wasn’t quite how it seemed. Saintly? No. Devil? Tampoco.

Not having been in the press conference meant he was relatively safe from the media at large, and nothing seemed to dent the feeling of being back in _his_ world, on _his_ terms, riding _his_ bike. Until a passing comment overheard by accident that made him crack and check twitter, which was full of support but also enough hell he couldn’t resist reading, until he was sat in a corner of the hotel bar staring into a beer he shouldn’t be having, expression almost blank but eyes down, alone and waiting, Mila in the shower and getting ready for dinner and no idea of the downturn in mood, Alex off somewhere doing something more important, team somehow not there either. Glum,blank, and feeling a bubble of hurt slowly simmering under the surface.

Marc: I think I’d rather have dinner in the room tonight, see you in the morning

Santi: Ok?

Marc: No.

Santi: What happened?

Marc: I’m the devil

Santi: Who says?

Marc: Everyone

Santi: You know that’s not true

Marc: Well hundreds and thousands of people think it

Santi: No, they don’t. Did you go on twitter?

Marc: Twitter, hola.com…everything.

Santi: They want to sell papers, nothing else. They’ll forget about it soon and you’ll still be together, and everything will be better

Marc: I was doing ok believing that but some of the stuff

Marc: I’m so angry

Marc: And it hurts so much

Marc: I’m a good person, right?

Santi: Where are you?

Marc: Hotel going back to the room, don’t worry I’ll be smiling again tomorrow for them

Santi: Ok I’m not going to try and drag you out of there if you don’t want. But please, don’t listen. You’re the best person I know. Being in charge of your team is a complete honour not because of how well we do, just because of who you are. Never forget that, ever. You’re a very important person in the world, Marc. Not because you’re a MotoGP rider, because you’re Marc and you make everyone’s lives around you just a little bit better. 

He reads that and grits his teeth slightly in happy emotion before taking a deep breath.

Marc: Never leave me, Santi. You know it’s mostly you? ;)

Santi: I can’t even count ;) it’s you. Be proud of who you are, not who they think you are. Because that’s an even bigger achievement than 10 wins in a row.

Marc: I can’t explain how that feels right now

Marc: And I can’t explain how much I love you. Like I said, never leave me. You’re cooler than Uccio ;)

Santi: Jaja. Did that help?

Marc: I’m really upset, but I don’t doubt anymore. Just like Phillip Island

Santi: Glad I could help…again?? Jeje

Marc: Jaja :P You always help. Really, thank you.

Santi: Room service dinner?

Marc: Yeah. Not hiding though, just want to remind myself even more why it’s worth it.

Santi: I think she’s amazing

Marc: I’m glad :) do you think I can have 3 best men?

Santi: Jaja probably! Wait and see if we fall out I think ;)

Marc: Ah.

Santi: ???

Marc: I didn’t tell you yet :D

Santi: No!! Seriously?!!

Marc: I asked last night. I have the ring and have had it for a while but wanted to choose the moment :)

Santi: Wow!! She said yes?

Marc: Yes she did! Straightaway :D which was good for my nerves ;) 

Santi: I’m so happy for you!! :D can I tell everyone?

Marc: Yes!

Santi: :D and you already had the ring???

Marc: Yup :D

Santi: Wow. This is fast?

Marc: Always… ;)

Santi: Jaja. You’re sure?

Marc: I’m so sure

Marc: Wasn’t really looking for it but I don’t even know how I’m sat here alone right now. I know I became pathetic!

Santi: Aww no, not pathetic. I’m so happy for you :) 

Marc: Thank you, for everything.

Santi: Always :) can I ask something?

Marc: Yeah?

Santi: You trust people easily. You’re sure, sure, sure

Santi: I don’t mean I don’t think she’s fantastic, at all.

Marc: She’s beautiful on the outside too, I know. She’s a dancer without much money. It seems like a really bad idea, but honestly…I think you’ll see. :) and I’m not THAT naïve am I?!

Santi: Not naïve in a bad way ;) ok, well I think I see already. Go and find her and stop moping in the bar.

Marc: How did you know?

Santi: Look up!

Marc does, finding the slightly sadly- smiling face across the room, and ends up wrapped in a Santi for a few life affirming seconds, before finding himself in the lift, on the way back to the room, pausing outside the door for a second as he feels it hit him again – the fact that she’s real, the reason why it’s more than worth it – and lets it power him through the door, bathroom door in the room open slightly, warm moisture of the recent shower still in the air, light shining through in a beam as he hears her humming to herself. She stops to say hi to him and turn around but doesn’t make it before his arms grab around her from behind, hair still damp against his t shirt and towel she’s wrapped in proving a flight risk, breathing her in and catching her eye in the mirror they’re facing.

“Hey there…aren’t you Marc Marquez?” She tilts her head slightly to the side, eyes shining and gaze pulling him in even deeper, before shivering as his lips meet the crook of her neck, eyes still locked in the mirror.

“I am.” The little nod and the tiny flash of tongue visible as he moves his head back up to speak makes them both take a little breath. “I seem to have stumbled into heaven…”

“Not this again…”

“Again…and again…and again…” He lets the wicked smile take over, somehow not cocky or too much, maybe because his eyes are more puppy-style adoration, and then gives her a gentle squeeze before they’re face to face and the towel’s on the floor, lips locked, his hands cupping her face and sudden intensity, even for them, on the Marquez side of extreme. They manage to get back onto the carpeted floor before either fall over on the tiles, Marc’s t shirt discarded and jeans undone and fast approaching off, before they’re in the same position from that first night in Andorra, paused with her staring down at him, reality suspended for a second, until his arm snakes around her waist and pulls her down, lips together again and noise making the hair on the back of his neck stand up, not sure he’ll ever be able to communicate everything he wants to, but suddenly content to die trying. _The way you unravel for me._ It’s a sensory overload, even when he’s the one touching and watching, and he ends up losing some hair as her hand yanks through it, sudden flick of his tongue over her clit unexpected and sending a little tremor through he, before kissing his way back up to her mouth and groaning as he finally pushes inside, sudden switch to calmness taking over as the fight becomes more a team effort, melting together and staying there stuck together for almost hours after, until they have to move to let in room service, messy and slightly red-faced. After food they end up wordlessly back how they were before, Marc’s head resting on her stomach somehow, everything a comfortable tangle, moving up and down with the calmer breath after the storm as they half concentrate on a film, half talk and let the clock wind down to sleep, little bubble of serenity recaptured again for a little while.

“Babe?”

“Hmm?”

“Regret-“

“No.” She smiles and runs her fingers through his hair again before watching him turn his head to press a kiss against her stomach, looking up at her again after and both feeling the sudden little spark of fearful excitement go through them. _God, YOU can’t be thinking-_

“You want kids one day, right?”


	24. Trust Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much, I really hope you like this!! Please let me know :) ♥

marcmarquez93: Very special announcement…me and @bailadoramila are engaged :)!!! Pic.twitter.com/oiduvb

*

_Saturday at Indy: Marquez announces engagement_

*

“Morning.” 

“Morning.” He smiles across the pillow, watching her light up in the same way in response, both somehow cocooned under the sheet and warm sunlight filtering through the thin cotton to make everything glow. _Although I think you glow anyway._ “Sleep ok?”

“Yes.” She nods and smiles again at the badly-hidden relief before snuggling closer and pressing a little line of kisses down his chest as his fingers go round her and trace down her back. “You?”

“Yes.”

“Good. I think we’re getting better.”

“I think we are.” He nods slightly and presses a kiss into the crook of her neck. “I’m sorry about last night.”

“Don’t be.”

“I said I didn’t care.”

“Yeah well I said I did, so…” She moves her head back up to look at him and smiles knowingly as his fingers brush some hair behind her ear. 

“You do.”

“Ok, yeah I do. But honestly…What can you hear?”

“Hmm?”

“Right now, what can you hear?”

“Nothing.”

“Not true.”

“Um…well…I can hear you breathing…and me breathing…I can hear this…” He smiles and presses another kiss to her lips. “And nothing else.”

“Exactly. Just you, and me. No yelling, no evil words, no questions and judgments. Just two people who love each other. So it hurts sometimes, and it’s frustrating. But we’re still here, in the quiet far away from them, even better than before, right?”

“Even better than before.”

“Good.”

“But I am still sorry.”

“Marc, you’ve spent the last week picking up my pieces and putting them back together. Don’t apologise. We’re a team, ok?”

“A team.”

“The best team. ‘Cause we’ve got Marc Marquez…” She smiles at the slightly bashful little _ooh that’s me!_ and nods into another kiss. “But tell me something.”

“Hmm.”

“Does it hurt more than you were expecting, the backlash? Or did you try and pretend so I didn’t feel-“

“No, I never pretended. I just…yeah. It’s frustrating. More than I thought. Because they don’t know you. They don’t know anything, and they’ve just decided.”

“Ok. Do you want them to know me?”

“I don’t know. I just want you to be happy.”

“Well I want you to be happy, and I asked first, so…”

He smiles at that, accepting defeat slightly as only seemed to happen with Mila and his mother. “Well…maybe? I mean…I want you to come to races and stuff. You don’t have to follow me around always but I don’t like the idea of being away so much if you don’t come with me sometimes.”

“Ok. So my face is here to stay in the paddock, then.”

“I hope so.”

“Me too, so that’s good. Is that enough?”

“Enough?”

“I mean …I don’t know. I was actually thinking of writing something to put on twitter or Instagram or both. Just a kind of…our side of the story?”

“You would do that?”

“I would. Would you want us to do that?”

“I think that would make me feel less helpless.”

“Same.”

_I know, always._ “Tonight…?”

“Perf-” The word gets stolen as he rolls on top of her and grins down, switch suddenly flicked. _Perfect._

*

The Night Before

“What?!”

“Sorry…” He smiles through a bit of an ‘eek’ before shrugging and planting a kiss on her stomach. “Big question, random timing…”

“You could say that. You still want to ask it now you realise you’ve been very foolish?”

“Er, yes.” He grins back at that, already feeling a little bubble of hope and excitement appear from the tone of voice, signifying it’s probably not going to be a ‘no.’

“Well then yes I do want kids one day.”

The grin could power the Indianapolis metropolitan area, before it’s dimmed to _trying to be smooth._ “Ok. Cool…”

_Awwwwww._ “Yeah you seem really casual about it.” She laughs as his middle finger pops up from the sheets and gets pointed at her, his eyes still on the TV, before he lets his hand run down her leg and snuggles in a bit more. 

“Yup totally casual. As long as you mean with me.”

“Natural selection dictates I should probably say yes to that…”

“Pfff.” Another grin she can just see from the angle. “Hopefully so does true love.”

_Awwwwwwww._ “Ok true love does that too, yes. But you know…you’ve got to be careful about these things. Your genes seem ok though.”

“Phew.”

They lapse into happy silence for a little while longer before the scenarios in her head take over a bit too much. “Marc?”

“Hmm?”

“When were you thinking?”

“Don’t know really. Probably not this weekend.”

She laughs again and finally gives up on trying to watch the film, sliding down to join him off the pillow and ending up face to face. “Ok. Not this weekend.”

“Probably not next week either, I’m a bit busy.”

“Marc…”

“Jeje.” Another kiss. “Well…honestly I’ve no idea. Maybe in a long, long time. When no one remembers they hated me.”

“They don’t hate you. They probably love you more than before, you’ve given them something to sell.”

“Don’t.”

“Sorry…” _Ouch._ “Ok?” She frowns at the sudden change into emotional lip wobbling and moves in closer, watching him close his eyes to talk, trying to keep his voice steady.

“I just…don’t want to talk about it. Since…earlier…ok earlier I read everything. Or most of it. And it’s _horrible._ It was a stupid thing to do but I got too ravelled up in it. And I…I don’t know but it just…it’s too much…”

“Hey, shh. It’s not too much. It’s rude, and unpleasant. But it’s never going to be too much.”

“Feels like it.”

“Nope, never too much. Not for us now, us in 20 years, us with kids, us without them. Not too much.”

“I never thought about it before.”

“What, babe?”

“Kids.”

“But you just-“

“No, I mean…they’ll have to deal with this. They’ll have to read it. They’ll be able to read it-“

She cuts him off with a kiss as his voice starts to wobble, eventually ending up wrapped around him, running her fingers through his hair and staring at their reflection over his head, an unwitting reversed replay of the nights Marc had done the same in New York and Montreal. _I knew you hadn’t quite realised how it was going to feel, but I didn’t know it would hurt this badly._ “There’s a lot more they’ll be able to read that matters a lot more, already. A _lot_ more. In a while, and in the future, this is going to be nothing.”

“How do you-“

“I’m a woman, and we know things.” She smiles into his hair and the soft little laugh and sniff as that does successfully break the mood, before taking a deep breath and feeling him grab on again. _I get the feeling there’s no one else in the world who’s seen this._ "Trust me."

*

“Morning.”

“Morning.” Santi grins at him over the toast and then smiles at Mila, eyes then immediately looking for the ring, which she then realises and holds up. “Ooh nice.”

“Thank you.” They say it at the same time, like one of those terrible _you become each other after a while_ couples, before laughing in time as well and Mila eventually clapping her hand over his mouth to make it stop, which it does after a little too much suggestive eye contact that makes Santi cough slightly.

“Sorry.”

“Sorrry…”

The older man looks at them both, grins again, and watches Mila smile at Alex as he appears, before catching Marc’s eye again and sharing a knowing little look. _I know, we’re disgusting._

“It’s cute...?”

*

bailadoramila: Hi everyone :) I hear rumours about me and @marcmarquez93…

bailadoramila: Lucky for me they are true, and we are going to get married :) 

bailadoramila: a lot of people seem to have got a lot of things wrong though so I’m going to explain

bailadoramila: I left a controlling and emotionally abusive relationship because I fell in love with someone else [Marc]

bailadoramila: However it looks from the outside I think Marc’s fans know him and think he’s a good person [he is, I can confirm ;)]

bailadora: And that good person is the one I fell in love with. Should I stay with someone I don’t love who treats me badly and tries to control me? No.

bailadoramila: So that’s all there is to it. No affair, no poor ex-boyfriend that I left because Marc is famous

bailadoramila: I would have left Toni anyway, I’m just glad I was able to see the truth of it sooner

bailadoramila: People who love you don’t threaten to jump off a bridge if you don’t stay with them, it was just because they want to control you and ‘keep you’.

bailadoramila: Mental health is a serious thing and that’s not what this is about, this was a tactic to make me stay with him.

bailadoramila: I hope this makes some more sense of a situation that has so far been very one-sided

bailadoramila: But everyone who is asking, yes we’re very happy and thanks so much for the nice messages :) @marcmarquez93

_Retweeted by Marc Marquez and 281 others_

@nadiammmarquezes: @bailadoramila are you really a pole dancer?

@bailadoramila: .@nadiammmarquezes yes I really am a pole dancer. It’s an amazing sport and a lot of fun. There is more on my Instagram :)

_Retweeted by Marc Marquez and 2,109 others_

*

Mila: Did you have to retweet that one… ;) :P

Marc: I’m proud :D jejeje

Mila: Me too but flames and fire… [and thank you]

Marc: Don’t worry everyone knows you’re smokin’ hot anyway

Mila: Yeah definitely, I am a sex goddess

Marc: That’s not what I expected you to say jejeje

Mila: No room for modesty when you’re perfect

Mila: Like me

Marc: Ok *sigh*…I think I know what happened :P Lara?

Mila: Yes it’s meeeee ;) hi there Babychamp, we are waiting for you in the restaurant, please bring your Alex

Marc: He’s not mine but I’ll try!

Mila: I won’t give her back unless he comes. Exchange only.

*

Marc: Lara wants you

Alex: I know, I’m hiding

Marc: Restaurant, please…you’re my hostage exchange

Alex: If she took Mila you’ll probably never get her back tbh

Alex: Move on and don’t look back

Marc: PLeeasseeeeeee

Alex: :/

Marc: Why are you hiding?

Alex: Kind of terrified

Alex: It’s easier to say things than do things

Marc: It is. It’s also more fun to ‘do things’ than say them :P

Alex: She’s so hot though

Marc: Yeah exactly!

Alex: Don’t even try and tell me you weren’t intimidated!

Marc: I was but then turns out underneath Mila’s a human and she doesn’t bite

Alex: I think Lara bites

Marc: I think you have 30 seconds to meet me in the lobby or I’m going to tell Emilio about the terrible things on your phone :P

Alex: Pfffffff

“Hi.”

“Jeje. Knew it.”

“Don’t-“

*

marcmarquez93: Very happy for this new pole, thanks to my team! #NoPoleJokesPlease pic.twitter.com/cvhbjnas


	25. Back Against The Wall

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy..?
> 
> Not much plot really after that pit lane run today.. ;) ♥

He’s only looking for one face as he finishes the couple of team hugs, sea of shoulders parting in front of him and Mila appearing in the gap, grabbing him into a massive hug and both of them clinging on for a while and swaying on their feet before he’s pulling his helmet off for a proper kiss, ruffled and grinning and lit up, feeling the adrenaline course through him again as their eyes meet, mixture of emotions looking back at him intoxicating. He lets the congratulations ring in his ears until he can hear it again back in the room, everything back to how it should be in a few ways at least; weather glorious and fiancé grinning, race won and no more nastiness overheard. And it shows, team dinner full of the normal quickfire conversation and _jajajaja_ , a few autographs signed in the hotel reception and then back up to the room giggling to himself in the lift at Santi’s red face, the older man having discovered Mila’s sense of humour and slightly traumatised.

Then both trying to keep it family friendly as they go their separate ways and it’s just the two of them sharing those looks that say _once we’re through this door…_ , key card slammed into the slot and yanked back out in record time before her heel connects with the door to close it once they’re in, even just the way she’s dressed more like _her_ again and that re-igniting the initial burning hot need he’d felt seeing her for the first time as her jacket and his hoodie hit the floor quick, heels kicked off too violently across the room and making the kiss messier as they giggle into it. They end up in a pile on the bed, her straddling him and pinning his hands down either side of his head before grinding her hips and feeling the little groan reverberate through the bed, letting him go to pull her in as she leans down and hovers just above his lips for a second, teasing and loving the needy little noise it creates, pulling his bottom lip between her teeth before sitting them up to let him pull off her top and vice versa, turning the tables and kneeling over her to undo her top button and feel the noise of the zip going down make his own jeans even tighter. Once they’re gone, ending up cascading half over the TV which annoys them afterwards when they’re in the way, his shed as quickly as possible and left at the foot of the bed, there’s only the last layer of fabric to despatch and he pulls her back to her feet into another kiss, stumbling back to the wall and steadying themselves as his hand goes between her legs, memory of the first time they’d ever done this suddenly seeming like yesterday and blowing his mind all over again, before he feels nails dig into his back and pull him in, relief for both as he pushes inside sending a gasp through the room. Her leg half wraps around him to glue them together, his arm holding it there as he starts to thrust, still leaning on the wall with his other arm until she moves to lean them better against the support and he moves it round her waist instead, both grunting at the effort and covered in sweat already, loud and not caring, her fingers tangling in his hair and holding onto him as his head slips to the crook of her neck, the gesture enough to say this time is more about him, letting himself concentrate on the rhythm and the noise she makes every time they push into the wall a bit harder that sends him even further into delirium, before he’s close and she knows, holding him there and fingernails digging into the skin of his back harder as he thrusts again and lets go, wailing into the skin of her neck and both collapsing against the wall panting for a while, so much pressure released he feels like he’s suddenly walking on air, after the week and the weekend now completely relaxed and leaning on her, murmuring again after a while at the gentle fingers running through his hair, pulling away and pulling out to look at her again and lean again, this time forehead to forehead, breath still short and eyes now closed, tilting his head into a kiss and wrapping his arms around her. “Wow. Sorry you didn’t-“

“Shh.”

He does, somehow back to intimate and quiet so quickly, before picking her up and lying her down on the bed, staring down before licking his lips theatrically and raising his eyebrows enough to kickstart her heartrate again, more than enough answer in the expression and leaving him free to trail a thin line of saliva from left nipple to stomach and then lower, teasing, her breath ragged already, hips bucking against her will and the will of some kind of self-respect; the kind that leaves completely as she moans at the ceiling and tugs through his hair, tongue circling her clit and then flicking, sending a bolt of pleasure through the bed and a trick he repeats again and again to similar results until she’s swearing and writhing around as his name echoes through the room, muscles clenching around his fingers and chest heaving as she comes down from it and he takes the moment to just look at her for a couple of seconds. _So beautiful._ “W…”

“Wow is my word.”

_Couldn’t have guessed…_ He nods and smiles at that, chaste kiss before he collapses next to her and pulls her in to lie there for a while, still early and nothing else to do that could really be as good. _Wow is my word, I think._ “Ok…can we share?”

“I don’t think that’s something we have a problem with really babe…” She grins back as she says it, expression reflected she’s sure, before snuggling down into his chest and pressing a kiss in the middle of it, his arm squeezing in response, both relaxed enough to be asleep by midnight for the first time in forever.

“True.”


	26. Home Sweet Home

“Home. Sweet. Home.” Marc drops his hand luggage theatrically, not too far to the floor anyway off a low shoulder with the strap extended, and pushes his suitcase the extra few inches inside with his foot so he can swing the door closed behind them, big sigh and turning to see an equally tired pole dancer doing the same luggage tango, ending up face to face and leaning on each other, Marc’s arms going round her and swaying them slightly from side to side. “We made it…”

“One down, an entire future to go…”

“Hmm, I’m hoping we’ll be able to sleep again by then.”

“Yeah, same.” She pulls away with a smile, enough to get eye contact and drop a peck on his lips before burrowing back into his chest. “Probably not this week though…”

“No?”

“Well I have to free my stuff. I guess I’ll have to make a few trips and it’ll take a while so maybe by the time we fly to Brno it’ll be-“

“Woah, woah, woah. What?” 

“I thought I was moving in…”

“YES you ARE.” He grins enough to blast away the tired temporarily and gives her a squeeze. “What’s all the ‘I’, ‘I’, ‘I’…?”

“What?”

“WE, babe. WE have to get your stuff.”

“Oh. Aren’t you busy?”

“Yes and no…” He half pulls her over to the sofa before they end up in a tangle of limbs on it, both immediately feeling the fatigue hit them again. “I will be a bit busy.”

“See-“

“Helping my girlfriend move in with me, so-“

“Marc…”

“Yes?”

She sits up and prods him to make him open his eyes. “You don’t have-“

“I really hope you’re joking…”

“No, I don’t think-“

“Well I think we need to go to sleep and stop talking so much shit.” Eyes having closed again, he cracks one open to half grin at her. “I already sorted everything. My mum and dad, Tito, Alex and one of my friends you don’t know yet are going to meet us at the Repsol station in Cervera with a couple of vans on the way-“

“Are you being serious?!”

“I wanted to surprise you but I forgot because I’m too tired.” Another grin, before struggling them both upright and leaning back into the sofa back, head lolling to the side to look at her and smiling as she snuggles under his arm. “Tuesday. Which I guess is tomorrow. They’re going to be there at 1, and we’ll drive down together, they’ll go and amuse themselves at the IMAX in Port Vell to give us time to get everything ready, then-“

“You guys should be training-“

“Training is important, but so is how I feel. And right now, I just feel like this needs to be written in stone.” He looks down at her, both feeling the fizz in the eye contact and his fingers tracing gently over the ring on her finger, before he pulls himself up and manages to hoist her into a reasonable version of carrying her across the threshold, starting up the stairs expecting more complaints and then smiling down at the over-dramatic sigh of satisfaction as she goes limp except for holding on, neck exposed to him and too inviting for him to resist a carefully-balanced kiss. “You want to live here, _amor_?”

“I never want to leave here.”

 _I think that’s a yes._ He smiles down and nods, although her eyes are still shut, as they reach the bedroom and he puts her down on the end of the bed, both taking a moment to stare at each other as the massive flood of memories starts to hit them both, taking stock, letting it sink in, mirroring the first time in this room; only this time he’s not nervous and she’s not guilty, and there’s no time limit or questions or clouds. _Just us, and sometimes Alex, and anything or anyone else we want to be here._ “I was so scared of you coming here.”

“I was scared to come here.”

“Why?”

“Probably the opposite reason to you.”

“I was scared I’d just bought a house I really liked that was going to be haunted by you when you left and never came back.”

“I was scared I’d just gone to a house that was going to haunt me when I had to leave and never come back.”

“I know. Now.”

She nods at that, in some ways the nerves and avoiding and guilt and whole journey to this point ridiculous now they know quite how genuine that first moment they met was, before smiling and relaxing as his fingers grab the hem of her t shirt to pull it off, eventually ending up tangled under the sheets and both completely dead to the world in record time, not even realising it’s the first time they’re going to sleep there with it being ‘their’ house, that only sinking in the next morning when there’s too much light coming in through the window they never protected from the sun and they’re both squinting and grinning at each other, two words enough to communicate all that.

“Good morning.”

*

“Ok, Marc. Help me out here. Scarlett Johansson and Mila Kunis are-“

“Mila.”

“No but hear me out without the name-“

“Still Mila.”

“But-“

“Alex? Look at my fiancé.” He points to the passenger seat and grins, squeezing her knee and then catching Tito’s eye in the rear view mirror. “Now look at one of those too many photos on your phone of Lara-“

“But that’s not the same-“

“Actually I always get that.” The wide-eyed brunette in the passenger seat turns to look at Alex and shrugs. “’Ooh Mila like the actress!’ No. Mila like Meeeeeeela from my name and I’m not as pretty as her so shhh.”

“Pffff. You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.”

 _Awwww._ “So it’s all physical-“ She grins as he turns to look at her enough to quash that completely, her knowing that anyway but enjoying the tease, and giving Alex a chance to rejoin the conversation.

“But if Scarlett Johansson-“

“…turned up now you would run a mile…”

“Hey! I managed to not run from Lara!”

The other three in the car somehow manage to all share a look and a chorus of _we know!_ makes the younger Marquez huff slightly back in his seat. “Fine.”

“I’m happy you’re getting an education, son, but-“

“Please Tito please-“

The Almería resident grins at him and nudges him across the back seat before sharing a knowing and evil look with Marc again. “Sorry…”

“You’ll fill me in-“

“As soon as he stops being my shadow, his secrets are yours.”

The older brother grins and nods at him, more protestations lost as they pull into some services for petrol and make it a full ten paces before remembering they’re in public and going a bit tense, Alex and Tito sharing a look and a concerned little frown over the way the two people in front of them suddenly change from the confident teasing of the car to clinging onto each other almost, knuckles as they hold hands a bit white, two shades paler and voices half as loud.

_No idea. Nerves I guess._

*

“Ok first, Marc-“

“Hmm?” He turns back, now the two of them again stood on the street outside her apartment, and feels the same reality catch up with him as it has with her. _This is going to be hard._ “I’m here, he isn’t, and there’s nothing still in there that’s going to change that.”

“Hmm.”

“Come here.” He pulls her in for a couple of minutes, feeling the calm come back slightly and sensing she’s a bit more ready for it a few split seconds before she pulls away and proves him right. “Just pack and go. Yeah?”

“Yes.” _Deep breath._ “Pack and go.”


	27. Demons

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please let me know ♥ thank you and there will be more soon!
> 
> Happy birthday, Alex! ;)

Lara: I’m here, where are you

Lara: Mila

Lara: Mila

Lara: Right fine

Lara: Where the fuck are your brother and his fiancé?

Alex: Yeah I’m ok thanks, ok flight, good race. How about you? ;)

Lara: Sorry yeah *feigns interest* answer the question! :P

Alex: The café near there I think, packed and taking a break before we turn up to load it all

Lara: You’re in the city?

Alex: Yes

Lara: Ooooh

Alex: Where are you?

Lara: Wherever you are 

Alex: I’m on Passeig de Gràcia waiting for you or Marc, whoever comes first

Lara: I always come first if you do a good job ;)

Alex: ….

Lara: Jejeje. On the way, don’t start without me…

Alex: Seriously unless you know someone with an empty apartment down here, not going to happen

Lara: Be creative ;)

*

Walking in was easy enough, old habits taking over until they’re stood outside the door to the actual apartment, when she stops and takes a deep breath, Marc’s hand finding hers and squeezing, lips finding her ear and a low _hey, it’s just walls and stuff. No ghosts…_ making her squeeze back and turn to look at him as she turns the key, door swinging open and everything too quiet as she takes the first few steps, the room revealed making a big difference to the unknowing of having been looking at a closed door. 

They start in the kitchen, less memories there and quietly moving her stuff from cupboards and shelves to a box in the middle of the room. The only instruction - _if it’s worth keeping, put it in the box, it’s all mine anyway_ \- proving enough for them to finish that in 10 or 15 minutes, then moving through the living room and taking a couple of pictures down of Mila, rather than of the both of them, a poster from a tango show in Madrid they’d done that she wanted to take and wasn’t going to ask whether she could or not, and then a few CDs and some books, that fitting in another 2 or 3 boxes, before they’re in the bathroom and filling another one, then stood outside the bedroom and Marc moves his hand round her waist and gently moves them back towards the kitchen. “Come on, let’s have a break. Yeah?”

“Ok.”

“We’re doing well.”

“You are.”

“I mean with time.”

“I know, sorry.”

“No problem.” He gives her a squeeze and starts making them a coffee before turning as he realises she’s stood where she was before, frozen, and stops to go back over. “Hey. Ok?”

“Hmm. It’s really weird.”

“I can’t imagine, really.”

“Can we get out of here for a few minutes.”

“Sure, babe. Where do you want to go?”

“Anywhere. Just…somewhere else. Please.”

*

 _Ok maybe you paid attention._ “Alex.”

“Yes.”

“That was _verrrrrry_ good.”

“Really?”

“Yes. _Really._ ”

“I guess you were kind of ok…” He smiles sideways at her and grins at the whack to the arm before retaliating by pinning her down again and nipping her bottom lip. “But feel free to try harder.”

He yelps slightly into the kiss as a loud smack echoes round the room and he, and his left ass cheek, go a bit red, if only mainly because of the immediate physical reaction that is more than noticed. “God Lara…”

“Jeje.” She grins, one eyebrow raised, before shrugging and pulling him back in, groaning as his hand finds its way between her legs. _Oh you paid attention._ “Oh, _fuck_ …”

*

The tone makes him nod and grab the keys without another word, guiding her back to the door and out of it into the hallway, and then down to the street and back into the sun before he dares to pause and take a look at her, soon wrapped around her and feeling her shoulders start to shake, crossing them over the street to a café and sitting her down, crouching in front and looking up.

“Sorry Marc, God I’m s-“

“Don’t need to apologise. I understand.”

“You understand?”

“I know…” He checks they’re not being overheard leans up a bit closer, hands finding hers. “I know you’re not crying about him. Well…not crying because you miss him or anything.”

“I don’t. I just…I…that place was my life. And I know it’s small and shitty and I don’t even know how I lived there now….and I-I never wanted _you_ to see it…”

“Me? Why?”

“Because it’s horrible. You’re like a crown prince in a rubbish dump.”

“Aww, no. No no no.” He smiles sadly at that and cups her face with one hand. “Trust me, you never saw my room after a day of motocross when I was 12. It was _bad_.”

“But-“

“But you hadn’t got much money, you lived with _him_ , and now you don’t. And your stuff, the stuff we’re taking with us, that’s all amazing. Because it’s you. So don’t think that, and stop trying to pretend it’s just ‘weird’ or anything else, it’s ok.”

“I promise I’m not crying about him-“

“Hey.” He shakes his head again through a little smile, finding the ring on her finger and pulling it off when he realizes he’s already low enough anyway, switching to one knee and holding it back up to her. “You agreed to marry me, and you left him, and we’re moving in together. Ok? When I ask again now, does it make any difference?”

“No…” She runs her fingers her eyes briefly before holding out her hand and sniffing and smiling. “I would say yes every minute.”

“Ok, well will you marry me?”

“Yes.”

“Ok, cool.” He nods and grins at her before looking back at her hand long enough to push the ring back on, then capturing her into a kiss and going to sit opposite her, feet playing with each other and ending up with some ice cream and coffee that they share, before she’s nodding at the unasked question and they go back in after a couple of pictures with fans, straight to the bedroom and hauling stuff out as quickly as possible without damaging it. They end up with everything ready and piled in front of the door, both a bit breathless and standing hands on hips, looking at it for a few moments before she’s suddenly backing him into the wall and directing them back down the little hall to the bedroom, clothes flying off both and breath coming out in gasps between groans before he’s somewhat strangely pinned to the bed staring at the same bit of ceiling he knows _he _must have stared at before millions of times, the same mouth making _his_ breath catch as Marc’s is doing, the same dark eyes looking up at _him_ and sending sparks flying through _his_ veins, all things he only just about manages to get out of his mind once his fingertips are digging into her back and his senses can’t process anything except the woman on top of him, desperation still there since the switch in her seemed to have been flicked and not taking either of them long to growl over the edge in a tangle of limbs and sweat, chests heaving for a few seconds as the silence comes back and it’s suddenly obvious where they are again, Mila curling up against him and watching her fingers play patterns on his chest, voices low.__

__“Sorry.”_ _

__“Yeah I hated it…”_ _

__She lets herself smile in secret for a couple of seconds before looking up at him and shrugging slightly. “You know what I mean…”_ _

___Yeah, I know what you mean._ He presses a kiss to her forehead and stares back at the ceiling as they hear their phones both ping again back in the living room. “Was that exorcising demons or-“_ _

__“Yes.”_ _

__“Ok.”_ _

__“Is it?”_ _

__“Are they gone?”_ _

__“Maybe not gone and buried.” She tilts his head over to look at her again and closes her eyes into a kiss. “But they’re certainly dead.”_ _


	28. Since.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You've gone a bit quiet... :/ let me know?! ♥ 
> 
> Any errors I'm sorry...the equipment is new and I am not settling in well!
> 
> Switches between 'now' and the night in Mugello...
> 
> No idea how long it is because I have no word counter in this program!

"Is it too much to ask..." He smiles nervously at his dad and raises his eyebrows slightly. "To ask you to drive the stuff back for us?"

"Where to?"

"Cervera. We'll come back tomorrow."

"It wasn't easy for her, was it?"

Marc shakes his head and feels the flash of memory go through him. "No. But I have a plan."

"You're going to stay here?"

"I'm going to call the W and hopefully get the same room we had before. And then we're going to go and get Lemon sorbet."

"Lemon sorbet."

"Mugello. It came up...maybe the night I knew, properly knew, how I felt about her."

"Then I think we can definitely drive your stuff back home for you." Julia smiles at him, holding back from the kind of proud pat on the head he wanted to go for, before getting pulled into a hug and finding Roser's gaze as she appears over his shoulder, expression asking but patient as she lets the moment play out. "Look after her."

"I do. And she looks after me."

"I know the feeling."

*

Mugello

_Remember this moment._ He stares up at the moon a few seconds longer and takes a deep breath. _Remember this moment tomorrow, and next week, and next year. Remember this moment until you remember nothing else._

Marc: One day I'm going to marry her.

Alex: Get some sleep.

Alex: But I'm starting to see that :)

Marc: Imagine if Santi hadn't convinced me to go

Alex: You'd not know, at least

Marc: I would in a few years, believe me

Alex: ??

Marc: This is a one off, at some point I would have noticed the hole in my life and filled it with the wrong person

Alex: You believe in fate now then? ;)

Marc: No, I just think I'm the luckiest guy in the world.

Alex: Why her?

Marc: I dont even know, I just...know.

Marc: Going to sleep now, promise. ;)

*

"Ok so new plan..." He wraps his arms around her from behind and whacks a kiss into her hair. "We're going to stay here and my parents are driving the stuff back."

"What?"

"We're going to have dinner with Lara, Alex and Tito and everyone else is going back to Cervera. Then me and you are staying in the W, and then I have a surprise."

"Marc-"

"I already booked it, and organised it, and they already said they would be glad to do it. So just admit that sounds like heaven and-"

She turns round to look at him, his arms pulling her in a bit closer and eyebrows raised, waiting for the moment when she does admit it, before smiling as she nods and gives him a squeeze. "That sounds amazing, ok. And then tomorrow unpack and then pack and then fly."

"I'm sorry we have to."

"Have to...?"

"Go again so soon."

"Oh." She shakes her head and leans her lips up close to his ear, breathing him in. "But then we'll be home. And it doesn't matter how many times we leave now, does it?"

"Wh-"

"Because we'll always have the same home to come back to."

*

Mugello, but Barcelona

_Remember this moment forever._ The world seems a lot quieter now, lying in bed staring at the ceiling thinking through the evening, some things still swirling in her senses, the feeling of the goodnight kiss that they never even physically shared tingling on her lips. _Remember this night, and the sound of his voice, and the stars and the sounds and little Pique..._

Mila: I love Marc, Lara. I love him so much I'm terrified in the best way.

Lara: God finally

Mila: I feel like I just got switched on

Lara: What's brought this on?

Mila: Tonight was amazing, even though we're in two different countries it feels like he's here. Magic.

Lara: I'm only going to say this once. Do not let him go. Tell him every chance you get. And overwrite every memory you have with Antoni with another, better one. Please <3

Mila: This is how you felt.

Lara: This is how I feel. He's always here, even on day 1073

Mila: You count

Lara: Every minute

Mila: <3 

Lara: And yeah I noticed the 73.

Mila: <3 I didn't mean it like that, like I'm surprised

Lara: I didn't take it like that <3

Mila: I suddenly understand and I don't know how you get up in the morning. But I'm very glad you do. I love you <3

Lara: I love you too. And I don't know sometimes either

Lara: Well no, I do. Because he would have kicked my ass so hard if I gave up!!! <3

Mila: <3 You can go to sleep now. Thanks <3

Lara: Can I ask something?

Mila: Always!

Lara: How do you deal with him racing?

Mila: That's who he is, so as terrified as I am every lap, that's the way it is

Lara: You accept the risk

Mila: I do, I have to.

Lara: Night. (I think you're right and I think you're brave) <3 xxxx

Mila: Pffff xxxxxx

_Same to you._

*

He's got it more or unless under control again before Tito makes the same face he did half way though the story, and he's back to the loudest laugh in Catalunya before Alex and Lara have finished sharing their own look and looked back at him. _Being Marc Marquez perk no12: not being thrown out of expensive places for uncontrollably loud laughing._ The food is gone now, wine the only thing with calorific content left on the table, and they're just past paying and before leaving, Tito on the way to his feet and Marc just about able to follow after a cool down and the entirety of his fiancée's water. 

The oldest rider leaves first, off to meet some other people, and Marc and Mila end up stood in that same room, Alex and Lara in the bar. They grab jackets and smile their way past the other two as they make their way to a taxi to the Rambla del Mar, lemon sorbet arranged despite the hour, another perk of being Marc Marquez. Alex expects the moment he's been waiting for since early evening, the one where she leaves, and doesn't even know why he asked the question, until he hears the answer.

"Shall we get a room?"

She looks at him, he thinks, maybe a little more genuinely than normal. Not to say she's fake, more guarded. And he only feels his elevated heart rate once she's already nodded, aware they both just crossed a line they said they wouldn't, and about to ignore that completely before she beats him to it.

"Yeah. First can we go for a walk?"

"We can."

"And talk."

"Talk?"

"I need to tell you something." They reach the door and end up stood outside with a cursory glance at the moon, reflection of the moment lived a few earlier by his brother and her best friend, further apart and more nervous, silhouettes different, but close as they've been.

"You can tell me anything. Sex, yes. Friends as well."

"Ok. And then you can tell me if you still want to get that room."

"I will." _In both ways._ "Want to, and tell you." _With this wine, I'm not sure I have a choice._ He squeezes her hand and takes a deep breath as she squeezes back.

"We'll see."

"Lara did something happen-"

"No. Not really." _Just that one thing that I swore never would._ "I, er...I just need to tell you something. Today. Before I don't dare."

"Ok..."

"I lost count."

"What?"

She bites her lip to stop it wobbling and swallows, hard, before looking back at him and feeling everything crumble, held up for a few seconds before finding enough breath to try and start explaining. "I lost count of what day I'm on. Since..." _you._

_Since._


	29. When We Were Young

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title inspired by the Killers, chapter delayed by Jerez! ♥
> 
> Thank you, and I hope you like it. Not quite what a couple of you guessed but I hope that's not a bad thing! Sorry I make these things cryptic ;) ♥ this one jumps between brothers and between night before and morning after :)

Alex: Are you guys awake yet?

Marc: No ;)

Alex: Breakfast, we’ll be there at 10??

Marc: What?

Alex: We stayed. I will explain later!

Marc: Oooh??! :D

Alex: Complicated, but see you at 10?

Marc: Yep

*

“Lost count.” He stares at her, frowning a bit, then raises his eyebrows slightly as her face gets more and more emotional before she looks away and nods through a little shrug.

“Hmm.”

 _What._ “What did you lose count of, Lara? The days since what?”

“The days since it happened.”

“The days since it happened.” He kind of hovers round her, not really sure what to do because they’ve never, in now quite a few moments they’ve shared, gone past either laughing as friends or fucking as not-much-more. _Right._

“What happened? Is that what you want to tell me?”

“Hmm.”

The way she says that makes him give in, only the re-running conversations with her about ‘just sex’ stacked against it and every other sensible part of him wanting to do it, and wraps her up in a hug, relaxing as she stiffens for a few seconds and then grabs on, letting go more than he’d ever thought he’d see from _her_ and letting her fingertips dig in as she tries to get back some control. _Come on._ “Ok.” He presses his lips to her ear and gives her a squeeze. “Whenever you’re ready, you can tell me. Ok?”

“He d-died.”

*

“Alex and Lara are in the hotel.” He watches her face for the same reaction he felt on his and frowns slightly as it doesn’t appear. “Aren’t you surprised?”

 _I’m surprised it’s him. I’m not surprised they’re here._ “Um, maybe?”

“He said it was complicated and I’m guessing you know why?”

“Yes…”

“Ok..is she pregnant or…?”

“NO!!” The wide eyes and gasp go further than the word to making him cringe at even having said it.

“Ok…” _Oops._

“It’s about her. And the past, I think. Well…I know. But it’s not up to-“

“Ok, sorry.” He cuts her off with a kiss and snuggles back down, summer outside but air conditioned inside, and nods as she checks whether she’s said enough to stop him worrying. “Not trying to make you tell me.”

*

 _What?!_ He feels his mouth go slightly dry as she says that, of all the things he might slightly have been expecting or fearing that certainly not on the list, and then holds onto her a bit tighter for a few minutes before it starts to tumble out, eventually ending up sat on a bench by the beach watching her smoke and talk, eyes glassy and memory obviously incredibly vivid, and painful.

“Joan. Me and Joan. We grew up together, me and him and Mila. And he had a crush on her forever, when we were young. And it always annoyed me, and I didn’t know why.” She smiles slightly sadly and flicks some ash from the cigarette. “And then we ended up locked in a wardrobe together when we were…15 I think? And somehow they forgot about us. So we sat there for a while, and we were both pretty drunk and young and…you know. When we got out there was only Mila left and she went out to meet someone and she was all ridiculously dolled up and trying to act older…but that was normal then, because we were always at her house anyway. At some point we kissed, then again…ended up in bed. Lost our virginity to each other. And that was it. I guess it flicked a switch or something because from then until the day it h-happened I think we spent 4 nights apart and argued about twice.” She smiles again and bites her lip to stop it wobbling. “And everyone said it wouldn’t last, I just don’t think they meant how it turned out.”

*

 _Heaven._ He steals another kiss and pins her down, the noise she makes shivering down his spine, before feeling her legs go round him and pull them together, ending up glued forehead to forehead and both catching their breath before he starts to move. _Heaven._

*

“And we got engaged when we were 18. And we were planning everything. And my dad died – I didn’t really know him very well because he’d never been around much – and I got some money.” Her voice gets higher and higher as the next words find their way out. “And we were going to spend it on a house, and the wedding, and we were going to go and study and…just, everything. And then I said we should go travelling.”

He bites his own lip at the way she says that, guilt about what’s about to be said more than evident in her tone of voice and him more than sure it’s not going to be merited. 

“And we did. We went to Cuba, first. Then further down and went to Colombia and Brasil. And we went to Sao Paulo because I really always…” _Always…_ “A-always wanted to g-go. So we did. And it was really good, and we had a great time, and on the day we were supposed to leave he went out to get breakfast and…”

_And…_

“A-and he n-never came back be-cause he got h-hit by a c-car.”

*

He collapses on top of her, face over her shoulder and half smothered in pillow, as she groans at the ceiling and does the same but with nowhere to fall to, already smothered in Marc and sheets and letting her hands wander down his back as they both come back to reality a bit after a few seconds, him raising his head to find eye contact and backing it up with another kiss that makes her close her eyes and run her fingers through his hair, thoughts drifting back to the other two in the hotel and wondering if it’s Alex the Friend and Lara the Distant-Morning-After, or something more similar to what they’re sharing in this suite, snuggling back into him and her fingertips wandering over his chest as the day’s plans start to creep up on them.

“I can’t wait to move-“

“Marc?”

“Hmm?”

“You promise me you’re going to be careful. On the bike and all the time. Every day, and every minute-“

“Hey, where’s this come from-“

“Don’t tell anyone I told you, ok?”

“Of course-“

“Lara was engaged.”

“Oh.”

“And he died.”

_Oh._

“And I never really realised how amazing it is that she can still even get out of bed-“

_Oh._

*

 _And now we’re not crying, and the sun is almost starting to appear, and we can smile again at least a bit, and we’re still sat here, and I’m still not sure why you told me._ “Lara?”

“Hmm?”

“We should go and sleep for a little bit. I need to before Brno.”

“We should, and you do.” She nods and pulls herself up from where they’ve been lying on the beach, staring at the sea for a few seconds before looking back down at him and raising her eyebrows. “You still want to?”

“Want to?”

“Get that room?”

 _Yes._ The speed his brain creates the answer makes him take a bit of a breath. _I really do._ “Yeah.”

“Ok.”

“You do?”

“Well, yes.”

“Is that obvious?”

“Why do you think I told you-“

“I don’t know-“

“I lost fucking count of the days since I lost the only thing that ever mattered to me and the reason why is still not getting why-“

 _Oh._ “You want this to be more-“

“What I want isn’t as important as what you-“

“Yes it is.”

“No, it isn’t.”

“What you want is all I want right now, ok? So if you want to leave and just, you know…thanks for listening kind of thing, that’s fine-“

“Alex?”

“Yeah?”

“There’s only one other person who knows all this, ok? I don’t tell people because I need to.”

“Then why-“

“Because you’re the only other person that makes me feel like me again.”

He stares back at her for what feels like too long before he’s pulled her down into a kiss, both covered in sand and nothing thought through more than just never having wanted to do anything more in his life, relaxing into it as she pulls him in and they end up there for another few too many minutes before they’re watching themselves using the keycard and unlocking the door, paying attention to getting undressed, paying attention to the kisses and fingers running over torsos and through hair, something more than different and that more than confirmed as they end up in a tangled heap, nothing more said before the light is turned off.

*

“So we got our lemon sorbet...” He grins at her and bumps shoulders with her, memory of that night flashing between them, sat on a bench on the Rambla del Mar much-too-late to be normal but perfect anyway, and leans back as she does, nodding.

“We got our lemon sorbet.”

“And maybe one day some little Piques…”

“One day!” She turns and grins back before leaving a smudge of sorbet on the end of his nose and laughing at the cold-induced squeal that creates, taking a massive lick of ice cream and squealing back as he manages to lick her cheek with an icy tongue. “Ew!”

“Jeje.” He grins again, going in for a proper kiss and moving the sorbet away from then so they don’t hit it, really becoming the couple from the bench that she’d described down the phone and that not lost on either of them. “One day is good enough.”

“It had better be because I’m a dancer and that stuff will ruin me.” Another grin as he lets his fingers delve under the fabric of her top and onto the small of her back. “Yeah see you wouldn’t want to ruin this, would you?” 

“I do like this.” He nods and steals another lick of ice cream as his fingertips dig in on _this_. “But it’s not really that important.”

“You say that now-“

“Are you saying you’re not going to love me when I’m grey and old, _amor?!_ ”

“No! I will love you when you’re grey and old.”

“Good. And when I’m – sometime – going to need you to be my nurse and-“

“Yes.”

“And when I’m-“

“It doesn’t matter what you’re going to say, you know.”

 _Yeah, I do._ He nods and leans in for another kiss, lost to it like 14 year olds past a non-existent curfew, before pulling out his phone. They spend a few minutes working on the best combination between stupid and pretty for a lemon sorbet selfie, finally finishing the ice cream once it’s almost melted and starting to walk back instead of taking a taxi, chatter going back to the paddock and Rufea and Lara and Alex and Tito and a little bit of the future and weddings and honeymoons and furniture and dancing, neither too overwhelmed by that once the relaxed mood of their opposite number has sunk in, calling for a bottle of champagne once they’re back and turning slightly red as they realise it’s been left outside when they were in the shower, hoping that wasn’t overheard.

marcmarquez93: Unforgettable night in Barcelona with my love @bailadoramila! #Celebrating #LemonSorbet pic.twitter.com/jbhugvsd

*

“Morning.”

“Morning.” _This is a first._

“Alex did you mean what you said-“

“Yeah, I meant what I said.” He smiles back at the nervous face, his nerves gone as they settle back down for a few minutes and there’s no trace of regret in her, pressing a kiss to her forehead and grinning into the pillow as she nibbles his nipple. _Same Lara. Just more of it._ "Definitely!"


	30. Foundations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok it's gone a bit quiet and I'm a bit worried... let me know if you like/what's not as good etc, please! ♥
> 
> and as always, THANK YOU!!!

Marc: You escaped before you could explain!!

Alex: We talked a lot last night, I think you might already know what happened?

Marc: Mila told me last night, yeah. 

Alex: So that’s why she’s been really distant

Marc: Was she distant?

Alex: Yeah. And it was good for a while but I actually really like her 

Marc: :)

Alex: So I think we’re a couple now. Certainly we kissed goodbye which is a bit different ;)

Marc: Jaja what was it before?

Alex: Kisses only allowed when fucking

Marc: :O alex! Jaja

Alex: I like her, I feel the pressure a bit though

Marc: Pressure?

Alex: I don’t want to hurt her, she’s had that enough

Marc: Ah ok. Well…how do you feel?

Alex: I was very happy she was there when I woke up

Marc: I think that’s a good place to start :)

*

“Hi.” _Do you even know who it is._ “It’s-“

_“Mila. Hello, are you ok?”_

_That’s a yes._ “Yeah, I’m ok thanks. Have you, er…seen the latest stuff?”

_“Yeah. We’ve tried contacting him but-“_

“What?!”

_“To get him to stop. Nothing too mafia-esque, don’t worry…”_

The low chuckle makes her relax again. “Oh, right.” And smile. “Well…that’s why I’m calling. Marc doesn’t care, but he said I should talk to you and see what you thought.”

_“I’m listening…”_

“Ok…well…I’m a pole dancer. Yeah?”

_“Yes.”_

“And I’m not ashamed about that, and neither is Marc. So…basically, we were talking after we unpacked most stuff this morning and kind of...came up with a plan.”

_“Ok…”_

“Because I don’t have a job anymore. I was meant to go back after the tour but after everything that’s happened and, you know…being publicly attached to Marc…we decided that wasn’t the best idea. So I need something to do, so we, er…we said maybe I might open a pole dancing school.”

_“Ok…”_

“Which obviously doesn’t involve you much…” _Mental image, please leave._ “I more just mean it’s going to make me much more visible on social media and online…and in shows and stuff…being a pole dancer. And after all the reactions, Marc doesn’t care, and wanted to check if you think it’s suicide or not.” _What a fucking terrible choice of words._ “Er…you know what I mean…” She laughs slightly under her breath, more from the horrible pressure of it than anything, and relaxes again as Emilio joins in with the need to bring a bit of light relief. “I mean, youtube channel, videos…tweets and pictures etc…”

_“And Marc doesn’t care.”_

“No.”

_“Ok. Do you want me to be honest?”_

“Yeah.”

_“Ok. Well the only thing that would have been better than this was him not falling in love with you, in PR terms. But that’s happened, and here we are. I don’t mean that’s my opinion, I just mean-“_

“No, I know what you mean.”

_“Ok, good. So…other than that, I think the best thing is to do exactly what you say. It’s true, and er…” I’ve watched videos of you where you dance half-naked. Great. “I’ve seen what you do, and it’s amazing. So I think showing people more of that can only be a good thing, now. And it’s a good reply to the smear campaign, too.”_

“That’s what we thought.”

_“Ok, well…just tell Marc to warn Hector and go for it.”_

_Go for it._ “Just be me.”

_“Just be you. He loves you, so chances are a lot of his fans will, too.”_

_Aww._ “Ok.” _But seriously…_ “Ok, Emilio. I’m going to test that theory then…”

_“Go for it.”_

*

Lara: Good race!! :D ♥

Alex: Thanks

Lara: Pffff

Alex: Sorry I was in a room of team people!! Thank you! Facetime? I’m in bed…

Lara: Go on then ;)

“Hello!”

_“HI!!!”_

“Aww Alex you’re so drunk.”

_“NO I’M FINE!!!!”_ Massive wink. _“GET YOUR CLOTHES OFF.”_

“You’re really lucky I love you for more than your body, Marquez junior.”

_“I’m verrrrrrrrry lucky.”_

_And didn’t notice that possible slip of the tongue._ “Ok, men first. Take off your boxers and show me what I’m missing…”

*

bailadoramila: I said news after Brno! So here is the news [no, NO BABY ;) :P] … I’m opening a pole dancing school in Barcelona!

bailadoramila: So there will be more stuff from me, and you will get to see me as Mila more than MRS MARC :P

bailadoramila: I love @marcmarquez93 but I can kick his ass at some things :D jeje

bailadoramila: like THIS, yesterday I cooked this: pic.twitter.com/jbdaobd

bailadoramila: and he managed to cook…um….this…. pic.twitter.com/jhycvban

bailadoramila: and so it’s not sexist, I also had to fill the screenwash up, poor baby

marcmarquez93: SHHHHH!!!!! Jajaja pfff RT @bailadoramila: so it’s not sexist, I also had to fill the screenwash up, poor baby

bailadoramila: AND HE CLEANED MY BOOTS after my first day of motocross :D 

alexmarquez23: NO, HE DIDN’T!!! #thatwasme RT @bailadoramila AND HE CLEANED MY BOOTS after my first day of motocross :D

bailadoramila: Oh it’s worse than I thought jajajaja @alexmarquez23

marcmarquez93: @bailadoramila @alexmarquez23 I cleaned the VAN

@bailadoramila: @alexmarquez23 @marcmarquez93 did he, Alex?

@alexmarquez23: @bailadoramila @marcmarquez93 jeje that one’s true :D

@marcmarquez93: And I drove home when these guys were asleep. :P pic.twitter.com/ljhgcv

bailadoramila: That backfired xD back tomorrow with my first video…#LayYourHandsOnMe ;) bona nit!

*

Alex: Miss you tonight. Can you come back from Madrid?

Lara: Aww. Don’t ask me things like that though!

Alex: Why?

Lara: I just mean cause I’m crazy enough to do it! ;)

Alex: Oh, ok. Well hmm…it’s 7pm…there’s an AVE in an hour and I have my debit card ready… ??

Lara: Serious?

Alex: You said tomorrow’s thing was cancelled…

Lara: It was/is

Alex: Get yourself to Sants and I will pick you up, no one’s here

Lara: Stay in Cervera then?

Alex: Yes, bored and miss you

Lara: Ok.

Alex: Seriously?!

Lara: Yes, I’m packing now, book it

Alex: :O?!

Alex: DONE!

Lara: In the taxi, I’ll pay this bit ;) do I get expenses? ;)

Alex: Jaja nope :P

Lara: ♥ thanks babe, that’s awesome. Sorry I can’t pay yet :/

Alex: All good, I’ll pick you up. Text me when you’re getting a bit closer and I’ll drive down

Lara: Don’t know if now is the right time to tell you…

Lara: But it’s quite fun having a bit more than sex with you

Alex: Come and cuddle me ♥ jeje

Lara: I’m taking that as an agree :P

Alex: Agreeeeeeeeeeeeee

*

Marc: I’m at the shop, do you need anything?

Mila: Just you

Marc: Awww

Marc: But actually?

Mila: you won’t like me ♥ but please can you bring tampax compak normal please and also an aubergine

Mila: To make it worth it, I finished the routine and I’ll give you a private show

Marc: Oohhhhhhhhh [and ok I will try, I may need to send pictures to check I got the right thing :/]

Mila: Jaja is it just you and Alex?

Marc: Just me, Alex is staying in Cervera

Mila: Well… ;) show tonight then! ;)

Marc: Speed limits what speed limits

Mila: *mwah* [be careful]

Marc: I’ll never forgive you

Mila: what happened…

Marc: Espargaros in the shop, awkward

Marc: And my basket has 3 things in it: Danet, tampons and an aubergine

Marc: They noticed and I’m leaving asap jajaja argghhhh

Mila: I love you to pieces you idiot <3

Marc: Jaja. I’m a big boy now! ;) Eina is tied up outside, say the word and she’s yours…

Mila: Jajaja YES

Marc: ;) see you soon xxxxx

*

“Hey…” He grins and grabs her from behind, depositing the bag on the counter next to her and grabbing the wooden spoon as a kiss gets buried in the crook of her neck, pointing at the bag. “I brought dinner…”

She laughs, grabbing the spoon back and nodding, before it ends up in a classic rom-com fight with sauce across the kitchen, tickling and reminding them both why living in a detached house is a good idea, only ending once there’s a tampon dumped in the pan and she’s wielding the spoon, wide-eyed, as he picks it out and stares at it.

“Seriously, don’t…”

“Don’t?”

“Don’t try that innocent face and don’t-“ _do that._ “Ewwwwwwwwww….” She watches him laugh and lick it again before shaking her head and shrugging.

“What?!”

“WHY WOULD YOU-“

“It’s only cotton wool and string and sauce-“

“It’s NOT RIGHT.” Splat. “Ok, THAT’S WORSE.” _Round 2._

*

bailadoramila: Ok so this is what pole dancing is about! Not trashy, and very hard work!

bailadoramila: It’s good for you, and it’s fun. So here we go…

bailadoramila: Follow this link, new website, and first routine…

*

Alex: I’m happy with Lara but also tango isn’t that good ;) guess you’ve watched it…

Marc: I filmed it!

Alex: How does she do that

Marc: I still don’t even know, I thought I was flexible

*

Lara: RED HAIR?!

Mila: Is this about my hair looking more red or are you wondering whether to dye yours?

Lara: Oh was it lighting a bit?

Mila: Yeah a bit!

Lara: Ah ok. Mine’s platinum blonde now, Alex likes it :)

Mila: Ooh! Insta pic please

Lara: Done. Like?

Mila: Wow!! And it’s shorter?

Lara: Scarlett Johansson’s fault

Mila: Jaja. How is it going with Alex?

Lara: Good :)

Mila: Please, less detail :P

Lara: Jaja. No, it’s good. We’re like a normal boyfriend and girlfriend, in a very good way. It’s weird sometimes though

Mila: Aww ♥ weird?

Lara: sharing the bed, feeling the butterflies…it has been a long time.

Mila: I’m very happy for you :) keeper? ;)

Lara: Jaja no idea, but I’m ok to wait and see, and I think he is too

Mila: ♥

*

Tito: I have a problem..

Marc: ok?

Tito: I feel like telling you is mean but I don't know who else to tell and it's driving me mad, need to deal with it before it gets worse

Marc: Ok, you know you can tell me anything

Tito: Lara

Marc: did she do something bad? :/

Tito: No, I wouldn't know anyway, I hardly know her

Marc: I didn't think you did

Tito: So how do I feel like I'm half in love with her...

"Shit."


	31. We Can Work It Out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ♥

_Well I either tell her now, or I don’t tell her. Which kind of depends on whether I would be able to or want to lie, whether she would figure it out which is likely, and how likely I think it is that this won’t be the last time it’s mentioned._ He’s sat staring at the mountain again, Mila on her way back from somewhere doing something possibly related to interior design of the school and him having spent the afternoon doing glorious types of nothing [gym session and aborted tortilla cooking not included], and takes another swig of beer before leaning his head back on the wall. _Do I think he’s going to forget about her. Do I think he should. Do I think her and Alex will last. Do I think Mila will help this or make it worse. Do I think I can keep it to myself._ Another swig. _No. No idea. No? Help. No._ And another. _So that’s decided then, and in the nick of time._ He smiles to himself as he hears the door open back inside and the now familiar but still exciting _hoooolaaaaaa_ as she walks in, nodding in the decision made and answering where he is, soon with a lap full of pole dancer and distantly hoping the shower of hello kisses will never fade, before she senses it, already, and he shrugs and takes a deep breath.

“Tito has feelings for Lara.” _3, 2, 1…_

“Whaaaat…”

 _Yeah, I know._ “Yeah, I know.”

*

Alex: Sorry I’m late, be there in 10 minutes

Lara: Ok, I understand :) x

Alex: Sorry actually 20

Lara: I understand a bit less

Alex: I said I might be late

Lara: 2 hours ago now

Alex: I know, sorry. You know I couldn’t leave earlier, I did want to x x

Lara: Ok. I know. xx

*

“So…I mean…seriously? Like not just ‘oh she’s hot’-“

“I guess more than that since he said he felt like he was half in love with her?”

“Shit.”

“I know.”

“So…”

“So…”

“So, I mean…what do we do? Anything? What can we do?”

“I have no idea. But I guess it’s serious enough since he actually told me.”

“I guess. Do you think he’s warning you or asking for advice or what?”

“Honestly, I just think he needed to tell someone, and it’s not like he was going to tell his dad or anyone like that. And there’s other friends but maybe they would be more anti-Alex? I don’t know. Maybe I’m meant to tell him to leave it. Obviously everyone in the team is a no.”

“Hmm.”

“Hmm.” He raises his eyebrows and smiles as they end up face to face but much closer. _I know that face so well, now._ “What does ‘hmm’ mean?” _So much._

“Hmm means…” _What does it mean._ “Hmm means…do you see it lasting? With Alex and Lara?”

“I don’t feel like I know her well enough to say, really. You?”

“I don’t feel like I know Alex well enough either.”

“Well I guess she’s fairly invested since she let him in…”

“She did. And I think so? But she’s not like before. I mean, maybe she never will be. Maybe you only get that once.”

 _And if she isn’t like that then does that mean Alex-_ “So Alex would never get it.”

“I don’t know. Maybe we’re not normal. Maybe it can get as good as this after years and everyone does it differently. Maybe the only real way is a lightning bolt moment like we had. I don’t know.”

“Love you too.” _That smile, with just a little bit of rain in there somewhere._ He leans in for a chaste kiss and they shift slightly for her to be comfier, still sat on his lap. “And I don’t know either.”

*

“Sorry.”

She looks at him and shrugs, accepting the greeting hug and kiss and shutting the door behind him before feeling the irritation fade as he picks her up from behind and spins her round. “Alex put me down!”

“No.” Sloppy kiss to the cheek. “I’m really sorry, and I’ll be better organised next time. Ok?”

“Ok.”

“Really ok?”

“Really ok.” She nods and smiles, now back on dry land, and drags him over to the sofa. “Movie.”

“Sounds good.”

“Good, because I’ve been looking forward to this all day and was starting to pout.” She smiles and moulds him into a comfy shape, ending up with his arm round her, both settling into it and starting the film, nothing more said until the end credits are rolling and she’s staring off into space. 

“Lara…”

“Hmm.”

“Lara?”

“No. What? Sorry. What did you say?”

He frowns at the expression slightly before his eyebrows raise ready for the question. “Are you ok?”

 _Yeah fine, just-_ “Got a lot on my mind.”

“Are you going to dump me?”

“What?!”

 _Was that a stupid question._ “Because I’m really sorry I was late-“

“It’s not that. And no, unless you want me to?!”

“No!”

“Ok…” _This got weird._ “Well…no, not you. I mean…a bit you?”

“Did I do something wrong?”

“No. I just…” _Need to figure out what the fuck I’m doing._ “Ok, Alex? I need to talk to Mila.”

“Mila.”

“Yeah.” _This conversation wasn’t meant to happen tonight._ “The tour got cancelled, obviously, so we’re only getting about half the money from that. The thing I went to Madrid for isn’t happening. I was offered her old job but I’m not that good at choreography and I don’t think I’d be very good at it.”

 _Right.._ “Ok…”

“So basically unless she can offer me a job, I have to move.”

“Move…”

“Yeah, to where the other job is I got offered…”

“Ok, and where-“

“Buenos Aires. Building something from the ground up, really good backing…”

 _Oh._ He stares at her for a few seconds, letting it sink in and well aware he’s being observed, before he manages to find his voice and nods. “Ok, then…yeah I think you need to talk to Mila.” _Please. Or…_ He thinks over all the cautiousness he bullied Marc with and takes a deep breath. _Sounds really sensible when it’s not you._ “Or we could make it work.”

“Work…”

“I have enough money for us to more than live on.”

“I think I already took enough-“

“You didn’t take it, I gave it. I mean…it’s not even much, is it? Some hotels and flights, trains, meals…you’re hardly living off me-“

“I know. And, being honest…I mean…those are things I wouldn’t need to pay for if I didn’t have you.” _Ok good you took that the right way._ “You know what I mean?”

“I know. Exactly.”

“So I really appreciate that. But…” _But._ “But it’s not so much the money…more…what am I going to do? I had a kind of plan, and then half of it got cancelled and the other half is too far away from everyone I care about to seem as exciting as it did. BUT I don’t want to just be a badly-paid dancer until I’m too old and then be a badly paid choreographer and manager. You know? Maybe I don’t have the talent that Mila has, but I’m better at what I do than just earning enough to support myself for the next 50 years and then dying.”

“You’re amazing-“

“I’m pretty good.” She smiles at him and shrugs as nicely as possible. “But I’m not her. And I wouldn’t want to be, really. I have to do a routine 50 more times than her to get it like she can, I know that, but I kind of like it, because it feels like I earn it.”

“You do. But Buenos Aires-“

“Is a long way away, but one of the greatest opportunities I’ve ever been offered.” _How do you feel about it!_ “So…I don’t know.”

 _How do I feel about it._ “I can’t sit here and ask you not to go, because if that’s who I was me and Marc would be at university and not World Champions.” _But._ “But….I don’t know. Would working with Mila be the same or second best?”

“That depends.”

“On?”

“On whether I’d be working with her or for her.”

 _Ah. Know the feeling._ “Right.”

“You understand-“

“Yeah, I really do. You going to call her?”

“Tomorrow.”

“Ok.”

 _Ok._ “What do you want me to say?”

“I want you to be happy.”

“I want to know what YOU want me to say would make me happy.”

“Then I want you to stay in Catalunya or at least stay in Spain.”

 _Ok._ She breathes a little sigh of relief and nods, both starting to smile a bit, maybe a bit sadly, before she leans in again and wraps her hands round his neck, breath shared and lips grazing his as she talks. “Then tomorrow I will talk to Mila.”

*

 _Please come to bed._ He cracks one eye open to stare at the ceiling before sighing and pulling back the sheets. “Babe?”

_“Two minutes. I have to get this organised before the next race.”_

“I know, amor, but I need to sleep.”

_“Then go to sleep, baby. I’ll be quiet when I come in.”_

_You make me say it._ “Bed’s cold and I didn’t get a goodnight kiss…”

_“Fuck’s sake.”_

He grins to himself at the smile he can hear in the words before grinning at her as she appears in the doorway, jogging bottoms and his favourite faded Honda t shirt and hair everywhere, staying where he is as she climbs onto the bed and wraps herself around him in a goodnight kiss.

“Night, baby. I will see you I the morning, sleep well.”

 _Ok maybe a bit better._ “Ok. Night, please don’t stress too much.”

“Not stressed.” Eye to eye and both caught in the tractor beam again. “I love it, it’s just officially too much work for one person.”

“I know.”

“Goodnight.”

 _Ok I get the hint._ “Night, superhero. Hope you get everything done.” He whacks another peck on her lips before smiling back into the pillow as she nods and ruffles his hair on her way out. _Miss you._

*

titomeria: On the way to Motorland, sleeping beauty won't wake up, @alexsegre12

samosahermoza: jajaja @titomeria try a kiss ;)

titomeria: @samosahermoza I would but he's not my type ;) :P

samosahermoza: me neither ;) jejeje @alexsegre12


	32. Aragón Part 1: "Costume Makes The Clown"

Alex: On my way. Late again. Sorry.

Tito: I just got here and I made us go for coffee so think you’re ok ;)

Alex: Jaja ok :) honestly then I only left about 10 minutes ago :/

Tito: From Cervera?!

Alex: No!! Lara!!!! So not too far away.

Tito: Oh ok!! That makes more sense jaja. Is she coming?

Alex: No, she’s trying to decide whether she’s going to move to fucking Argentina. :(

Tito: WHAT?

Alex: I know. :/ Talk to you in a bit, we’re on the ronda de dalt anyway 

Tito: Ok

_I shouldn’t._

He chews his lip and stares at the screen for another couple of seconds before feeling a bolt of guilt accompany a bolt of excitement and nerves.

Tito: Are you coming this weekend?

Lara: TITO! Yes, I am! Saturday is the plan. :) are you? ;)

Tito: Thought I’d give it a miss ;)

Lara: Jajaja I bet!! Home races are so boring ;) how is your leg?

_She remembered._

Tito: Almost perfect thanks :) and yeah they are! I hate them and I never do well ;)

Lara: Jaja <3 you’re the King, mate!! I will see you soon! And maybe before Saturday since I think Mila just told me to drive there now! Are you waiting for Alex by any chance? ;)

_Mate._

Tito: Maybe …

Lara: Jaja know the feeling. Not sure he can use his puppy dog eyes on you though!

Tito: Jaja nope ;)

Lara: Hmm sometimes me neither. How was the event yesterday?

_Sometimes me neither._

Tito: Good! He was late. *facepalm*

Lara: Jaja aww he is getting better though!

Tito: He is! Marc was way worse jaja

Lara: Jaja don’t even want to imagine xD you?

Tito: I’ve been on time since 1996

Lara: Jajajajaja somehow I can imagine that. Same. Mostly. I don’t know how Marc and Mila go anywhere together at the same time and aren’t late! We should put ourselves in charge ;)

Tito: Jaja we could try? Think you’d have more chance than me

Lara: Jeje maybe but I’m not even able to with Alex so I think I’ll give up on them!!

Tito: Jaja :D Maybe good plan. So before Saturday?

Lara: yup, setting off from Lleida in a minute, business talk to talk! Check insta please, you’re the only person online who is male and a rider haha

Lara: I mean…not that that’s important ;)

samosahermoza: Which dress for Motorland? Orange or blue? #crazycolours

titomeria: ooh, orange!! ;) jaja. @samosahermoza

samosahermoza: ok done :D #RepsolOrange? @titomeria

titomeria: @samosahermoza and…

samosahermoza: oh yeah @titomeria jajaja <3 #oops

_I have to stop, I have to have to stop._

Tito: Pfffffffffffffffffffff

Lara: Sorrrrrrry!! <3

*

Lara: I got offered a job in Buenos Aires

Lara: And I’m going to take it, unless…

Lara: You need a partner with the school? Think about it and let me know, and I’ll see you on Saturday night in Alcañiz?

Mila: Argh!! Buenos aires??!! Wow!!! Do you not want it?

Lara: It’s so far away, I’m not sure. Maybe?!

Mila: Is it a ‘I would need a job if I stayed’ or an ‘I would rather stay do you want a partner’?

Lara: More the second one, but I don’t know if you want to make this a joint thing?

Mila: Let me do some maths and talk to Marc <3

Lara: Ok…

Mila: Right, we talked and his mum decided jaja ;). I’m drowning in it, Lara! Partners? We [ok Marc and me but mainly Marc] put the money in, we take back the investment gradually, but split ownership 33/33/33 with you? BUT Marc has final say on things over 5,000 euros is the deal, until we’re running on profit and initial investment is paid ‘back’

Lara: Are you serious?!

Mila: Yessss, please come and tell me where the plants should be in the foyer!!

Lara: Jaja, where are you at with it?

Mila: Have the lease almost signed and most of the permissions and stuff are going through. I’ve done the main design of the rooms but if you want to start yesterday please God Lara please!!!! You could do salsa and tango too!

Lara: I finished my last job on Monday [sorry been out of touch, job + Alex = full time between races :/] so I’m free from yesterday…

Mila: Woo!! Before we start making a profit [hopefully!] when would you need paying?

Lara: Monday ;) :/ no it’s not that bad as long as this is going to happen, if it doesn’t I have to take Argentina

Lara: I mean I know it will happen and be successful! I just want you to make sure you want a partner

Mila: I really do if you want in!

Lara: I DO

Mila: Right well we’re now just pulling off to Motorland, where are you?

Lara: Shopping in Lleida, went for a drive round to think and made everything worse ;) :/ 

Mila: Jajaja ok, want to come down tonight? I’m spending most of the next 4 days in a motorhome with paperwork [pain lessened ‘cause it’s Marc Marquez’s motorhome, the Repsol Honda rider?] ;)

Mila: Turns out it doesn’t become a montage to music just because you do a lot xD :(

Lara: Jaja ok…well I’m just buying this dress then and setting off. xD EXCITING.

Mila: EXCITING!! Jeje :D Marc says ‘thank God, I want my girlfriend back’ 

Lara: aww! Long days?

Mila: Yes. But *cough* FIANCÉ ;)

Lara: Oh yeah jaja <3 set a date yet?

Mila: No, think I’ll stick to this for now ;)

Lara: Jaja ;) all ok with you guys?

Mila: Yesssss. You?

Lara: Me yes, me and Alex yes I hope/think 

Mila: ??

Lara: Bit worried he didn’t seem so upset by the idea of me moving, although his reasons and advice were good

Lara: And the sex wasn’t so terrible ;)

Mila: Jaja. Still wearing each other out?

Lara: No ;)

*

_“Hey there. Miss me?”_

_Please be happy because you’re staying._ “Jaja yeah! What’s up, bonita?”

_“Aww thanks. Jeje. Nothing much, but I am looking for lodgings for tonight until Sunday in somewhere called Motorland Aragón?”_

“Oh?!”

_“Yeah someone said if I called you you might be able to help me out…”_

“Funnily enough I’m actually there right now and I can make some space for one more. Will the sex be free?”

_“Always.”_

“I’m sure we can work something out then…” _But also, what?!_ “What’s made you change your mind, babe?”

_“Talked to Mila about everything.”_

_So you’re making the most of the time we have left, or..?_ “Ok…”

_“So I have a full time job in Catalunya. So I also still have somewhere to live and hopefully a beautiful Moto2 rider boyfriend.”_

He feels the relief go through him and shares a smile with Tito, the only other person in hearing distance and that maybe giving away that the news is good. “Oh, well…that sounds pretty good.”

_“Wow you sound happy.”_

“Hey, I am.”

_“Hmm.”_

“Lara, I’m with the team, ok? But I’m seriously relieved and yes, if it’s ok with you I would love to keep my beautiful girlfriend.”

_“Ok.”_

“Ok?”

_“You can make jokes about prostitutes and not sound happy? Ok.”_

“I was just worried what you were going to say. Ok?” _Ouch._

_“Yeah, ok. I’ll see you later then, if you’re free for dinner. And tell Tito thanks for the help with the dress.”_

“Don’t be like-“ _Too late. And what?!_ He looks at the now silent phone for a second before frowning at his teammate. “Lara says thanks for help with the dress…what?”

“Instagram when you were on the way.” _She just put the phone down on you._

“Oh. Right.”

“Ok?”

“Hmm.” _But I guess there was good news._ “But not going to Argentina.”

The defending champion feels himself relax and tries to conceal the breath of relief. _Thank God._ “That’s good then?”

“Yeah.” _Perfect._ “Great.”

*

 _God, I love Motorland._ She pulls into the paddock gate and winds down the window, ready to have to tell them who to call and what to say before the security guy smiles and nods. “Lara?”

 _Wow._ “That’s me. Where am I going?”

“Follow the road down left and I think there’s _someone_ waiting down there to meet you.”

 _Awww yay._ “Alex?”

“Marc.”

 _Oh, right._ “Ok. Thanks.” _Maybe I’m being a dick._ She pulls in and keeps it slow, following the instructions until she sees Mila and Marc talking to Santi and her friend grins and points across to where to pull in. _The MotoGP World Champion has time to hang around waiting for me, and his brother doesn’t. Maybe I’m not the dick._


	33. Aragón Part 2: "Everything or Nothing"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Part 2 of 2 for today. Have this all mapped out now ;) :) Marc and Mila will be BACK soon ♥
> 
> Thank you for reading, always ♥ let me know?!

_God you’re gorgeous._ He pokes her in the back and grins as she turns, relieved to see the smile on her face and wrapped immediately in a hug. “You made it. Ok trip?”

“Not bad! Ok with an unexpected guest?”

“Yes! I already invited you once.”

“True.” She smiles back at him before leaning up into a kiss and nodding. “I’m working though. Well, kind of.”

“Same..”

“Jeje, true. So…”

“So. I’m eating with the team so up to you who you want to eat with?”

 _And again._ “Right…”

“It’s an invite-“

“Didn’t sound like one…”

“I just know you haven’t seen Mila for ages?”

“Mila’s not my boyfriend though is she?”

“No, but you spent last night with me…?”

“Some of it, yeah.”

 _Ouch._ “Ok Lara seriously what happened recently because-“

“You tell me.”

“What?”

“Well a few weeks ago you seemed like I was your favourite person in the world and now I feel like a task to fit into your schedule.” _To be painfully honest. Ouch._

“What?!”

“Just being honest.”

“Well I’m pretty sure I’ve not changed anything at all so I don’t know what you want me to say.”

“What do you want to say?”

“Don’t really know except that it’s not fucking true.”

 _Woah._ “Feels like it.”

“Well I’m busy. You know that.”

“Yeah and I’m not busy because I’m not a World Champion, thanks I remember.”

“I didn’t mean it like that.”

“Maybe you should have said it how you meant it, then.”

“Seriously? You’ve been here 2 hours and you’re starting a fight with me?”

“I’m not starting a fight, Alex. I’m being honest.”

“Same.”

“Fine.”

“What did I do?”

“Nothing, babe. _Nothing at all._ ”

“You know what? It’s the night before practice at a home race and I really can’t be bothered with this.”

 _Typical._ “Yeah, sure, ok. Marc has time to hang around waiting for me and you don’t, I get it.”

“I was with the team.”

“Really? ‘Cause just before I arrived, Tito was done for the day and said team stuff was done until the meal, so…”

“I was with _my_ team, which I shouldn’t have to fucking explain on a race weekend-“

“And 5 minutes was too much, ok fine.”

“ _Fuck you._ ”

“You’d better fucking take that back-“

“I’m not taking it back. You fucking take it back! This is how it is, ok? I thought you knew that! If I want to spend an hour with Guille catching up I fucking will do.”

“Important team stuff, you said. Right. Beer with Guille I'm guessing? 0,0? You know if it was just this I’d be apologising to you by now but it’s all these little things-“

“Like what?”

“Like yesterday, and last week. And so many other times. Nobody knows about me. No photos. Not even on the private Instagram. You’ve never invited me to meet anyone. Never invited me to Rufea or said ‘hey shall we go for a run together’. No, always ‘I’m doing this, I’m doing that,’ ‘jaja we’ll both be in the gym at the same time’. Yeah we fucking will so why don’t we share _anything_?! Because you never give a shit to ask.”

“Oh seriously, just fuck off. It’s Thursday night and I’m going to go and eat with my team now. Let yourself in when you’re tired ‘working’ and showing yourself off to half the paddock.”

She stares after him, fire already replaced by hurt and lip wobbling at the words, before looking down at the plain black t shirt and jeans and swallowing, hard. _Right, ok. No problem._

*

Marc: Ok she’s here crying…

Alex: Great thanks for the update

Marc: ??

Alex: She knows where I am

Marc: And you know where she is…

Alex: Yeah and she’s the one who started it so tough shit, I’m going to sleep soon

Marc: I would love to but there’s a broken hearted beauty in my motorhome crying about you

Alex: Don’t

Marc: Well no idea what happened and I’m sure she said stuff too but I think it sounds like you need to get over here, asap

Alex: Can’t stand the heat don’t start the fire

Marc: Yeah exactly. You’re not just fucking each other anymore, you’re meant to care

Alex: Fuck off. I do care, I’m pissed off

Marc: You told HER to fuck off

Alex: Can’t even remember but maybe.

Marc: And you said she was showing herself off to half the paddock. And it’s her fault?

Alex: How is this to do with you?

Marc: Because she’s in my motorhome and I can see her point

Marc: Alex?

Marc: Seriously…

Marc: Alex don’t make me come and find you

Marc: Ok mum is coming to find you

Alex: Oh THANKS

Marc: Her decision

*

Alex: Right I’m going over, please don’t interfere

Roser: I think you should x

*

Roser: Did you tell your brother I was going to do something?

Marc: Yeah I told him you were going to find him ;)

Roser: Oh, Marc. Don’t do it again!

Roser: But…it worked!

Marc: Of course it did!! ;) Night mama 

Roser: Goodnight baby, sleep well for practice and tell Mila goodnight.

Marc: Goodnight Roser xox [from other M]

Roser: Night sweethearts xxx

*

 _Oh God please don’t cry._ “H…” _And what do I say, except the exact opposite of everything I said earlier._ “H-hey.”

“Hi.” 

He looks at her, looking up at him with round, slightly red eyes stood outside Marc's motorhome just finished a cigarette, and swallows. _I did that._ “Hi.” _And I should have been back here in 2 minutes._ “Sorry.”

“Yeah, same.” Sarcasm. “Aren’t you busy?”

“No.”

“Surprised.”

“Lara…”

“Yup, that’s me.” She shrugs slightly and smiles sadly. “Alex Marquez’s girlfriend, 2 days a month.”

“Come on, I’m not that bad.”

“No, you’re not that bad, babe. But I don’t think things like this should be judged on who’s the least shit.”

 _That’s certainly true._ “That’s true.”

“I know.”

“Did something happen?”

“Something.”

“Like…did I do something? Did something make this suddenly a thing without talking about it first-“

“No, nothing. Except I was going to move across the world and you seemed like it was slightly irritating. I cooked for you and you never showed up. I told you absolutely everything and you won’t even tag me on a private insta account where you trust everyone. And I wore something I th…” She trails off and bites her lip, expression on his face making it worse, before her voice gets through it, but shakier. “I wore something I thought you’d like, ‘cause I know you always say I look prettiest when…” _Come on._ “When I’m just me.”

 _I’ve been a complete idiot._ "God I’m really, really fucking sorry, please don't-”

“Why are you saying it over there.”

“Because I don’t know if you want me over _there_.”

“I just want you to be you, the you who makes me feel like me. Not the one who hides other girls he’s talking to and half ignores me. And I don’t mean you’re cheating-“

 _Shit._ “What?!”

“I saw that comment before you deleted it. I trust you, Alex. You don’t have to delete things and treat me like an idiot. You have friends and some of them are girls and maybe you fucked some of them once, fine. That was before.”

“It’s not what it looks like-“

“I know, babe. I just told you that! Do you not like me anymore? Honestly?”

“Honestly I was really…” _Terrified._ “Stupid. Ok? I was stupid and mean and please God, do NOT move to Argentina. I just…”

 _I think you finally mean that._ “Just?”

“Just…I’m kind of…scared. Ok?”

“Scared? Of me?!”

“No. Scared of …this, and scared…because you really let me in…and if…you know…”

“If it doesn’t work.”

“If, well…yeah…” _And if it does._

“And if it does.”

“Yeah, maybe that too.” He feels the weight lift off his shoulders slightly and ends up a lot closer, more where he should have been for quite some time. _That, really a lot, too._

“You know just because we spend time together doesn’t mean we have to get married.” 

“I know.” _She smiled._

“I really like you, ok? But I know that’s where we are, we’re not making promises of forever or anything. You don’t have to bend over backwards you just have to-“

“Treat you like my girlfriend. Or my friend.”

“Exactly. We’re always going to be that, aren’t we? Whatever happens.”

“I hope so.”

“Me too. So why-“

“Because I’m stupid, and mean, and stressed, and I was an idiot.” 

“We were fine before we made it more.”

“Don’t say that like you want to rewind.”

“I don’t want to rewind to what we had Alex, but I feel like I’m living in pause-“

“This is me pressing play, I promise, please don't-” _Do what I feel like you're about to do-_

“Don’t just say that-“

“I’m not just saying anything, Lara, I’m really not. I was before. Now, I’m not. Ok?”

“Ok but what can change because I know you are genuinely are busy-“

“A lot can change. I just…” _Just say it._ “Can I just ask you something?”

“Always. If you’re nice.”

 _Another smile._ “I think I just feel like…it’s a bit of pressure. Because I’m the first person since…that you’ve really been with and…” _Irony._ “…I don’t want to hurt you.”

“Babe, you might hurt me. And I might hurt you. Ok? But for God’s sake you’re not trapped-“

“I don’t mean it like that.”

“No, I know. But it’s not like that; if you don’t want to be with me, then you don’t want to be with me. There’s no added pressure I promise-“ She loses the words into a kiss, suddenly pressed up against the side of the motorhome and breath stolen as he finally dares and both feeling the tension crack slightly, before they stare at the floor for a few seconds, and then back at each other.

“Shall we go to bed.”

“You want-“

“I want to be with you, and I’m sorry.”

She looks at him for a few seconds, taking in the sight “Then yes. Let’s go to bed.” _Where were you hiding, real Alex._ She relaxes into him and smiles at the kiss to her forehead, fingertips digging into his back a bit and nodding into his chest. “My favourite part.”

“But just bed, it’s too late-“

“Pfff!” She grins and prods him before throwing her arms round his neck and whacking another sloppy kiss on his face. “I’m not that bad, am I?!”

 _What. Was. I. DOING._ “Well…” He relaxes into another kiss, slight panic at what it had felt like they were on the brink of dissipating, before shaking his head as they start to walk away, pulling out his phone and stopping. “Paddock selfie with my girlfriend Lara?”

“Which-“

“Private one.”

“Then yeah.” _Wow._ “Once I’ve dealt with my face...”

 _Perfect line._ “Like I said before.” He leans in to whisper in her ear. “You’re beautiful in everything or nothing.”


	34. Aragón Part 3: "Never"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: something from real life that breaks my heart is mentioned. I'm sorry for that. Just ♥. I hope it's obvious why it's here and that it comes from the right place.
> 
> Thank you ♥

_And Marc Marquez crosses the line to take another win at home in Motorland Aragón, and as you can see I think it’s a big relief after what happened last year, this being his favourite track and so close to Cervera…_

*

Alex: Have you actually left without me? Because I’ll be angry.

Marc: Jajajajajaja oh shiiitttt aren’t you with Tito and Lara?

Alex: No I’m watching the end of their car disappear 

Marc: Jajajajaja

*

_And good to see defending champion Tito Rabat back on the top step of the podium after a few difficult races, I think there’ll be a party invitation waiting for him if his great mate Marc Marquez can make it a win in MotoGP!_

*

Marc: Dad we missed one

Julia: Who?

Marc: ALEX jajajajaja

Julia: Oh dear. Ok we’ll turn round! Where is Lara?

Marc: Was meant to be her Alex and Tito so I guess with Tito driving up?

Marc: I will check

Julia: Ok. Who’s driving you? You’ve had champagne.

Marc: Hector :P and Mila says Tito says from Lara’s phone that Alex was meant to be with us

Marc: But we’re full so don’t know how that happened

Julia: Can’t they turn round? We left before them!

*

_It has undoubtedly been a difficult first season moving up for all of the protagonists of last year’s Moto3 title battle and I think today goes a long way to reminding a lot of people why they all did fight for a title. It’s been a great replay of so many moments from that Estrella Galicia team in the past, although this time in different colours. Márquez got some revenge for last year I think!_

*

Alex: Anybody there? Would appreciate not sleeping in the pit lane, thanks

Lara: Shit we thought you were with Marc, sorry baby xxxx

Alex: Pffffff! And don’t text whilst you’re driving

Lara: It’s ok, she’s driving and I was typing exactly what she said. Baby ;) Tito xxxx

Alex: Ew

Lara: We’ve turned round! ‘Wait, my love, we’ll be back in 5 minutes!’

Alex: Yeah speech marks please jaja

Alex: Also don’t read this one out loud and delete it straight after please but she said ‘amor’?

Lara: Yes ;) 

Lara: And done!

Alex: Cheers mate! Running off with my girlfriend pffff

Lara: Jajaja never! We saw you get in Marc’s car?!

Alex: Yeah I did, back to your car. You weren’t there so I walked back!

Lara: Oohhh ok. We’re nearly here anyway :)

Alex: Thanks although not really a grand gesture :P

Lara: Jaja. ‘Sorry baby I will make it up to you’ WINK. (I don’t like typing these)

Alex: Jajajajaja ;)

*

_And it’s been a long road back but I think after today we can certainly say Dani Pedrosa is back on top form! Took it all the way to the wire, in spectacular style!_

*

Dani: I think you forgot your brother! Jaja. Good race, see you in Japan!

Marc: Jajaja is he noticeable?! Thanks, you too! Missed this and great to have you back! 

Dani: Cheers mate! Same, revenge is coming! ;)

*

Marc: Crisis averted, they turned round. Dani saw him jaja

Julia: Oh dear! Jaja. Right ok, good. And we’re going to Cervera

Marc: No way! We are too! Jaja :P

Julia: Marc this is your mother now. Are we going to Cervera ????????????

Marc: Oh jaja. Yes! Should be food and stuff waiting in the restaurant, team members will be up in a bit

Julia: Ok. Drive safely

Marc: Hector’s driving, Mila is on directions. Me and JL are a bit worse for wear in the back

Julia: Sensible plan

Marc: Also not Jorge Lorenzo, Jose!

Julia: Jajajajaja

*

 _So close._ He grins sheepishly at his pissed off teammate, Alex waiting for them where they’d inadvertently left him as Lara parks up and gets out, all ‘eek’ face and puppy dog eyes. _So close to a whole drive with her. And now slightly awkward._ He coughs as she pulls Alex into a kiss and manages to defuse him; everything, he hopes, feeling a bit OTT because of more than just jealousy, before he turns and smiles equally sheepishly as Alex slides into the back seat and Lara gets back in the driving seat. “Sorry…”

“You know, I’d understand it if we forgot YOU. But ME?!” Alex ducks as Tito takes a swipe at him, both laughing and then swearing slightly as Lara floors it back out the entrance, before settling in and closing his eyes, cracking one open to catch his girlfriend’s eye in the mirror and smile, although grumpily, enough to say _it’s ok, these things happen._

“So are you staying over?”

“Yeah, and mum and dad get to meet Lara outside the paddock...”

 _Oh, wow._ “Ooh?” _Ouch._

“Yeah after being a commitment phobic idiot all week he’s decided he actually quite likes me.” She grins at Alex in the mirror, sending him a kiss as he raises his middle finger, before winking at Tito. “You know I mostly don’t mean that.”

 _I wish it hadn’t come from anywhere._ “Hey, I definitely don’t want to be involved in this!”

“Jeje. It’s ok now, he apologised. And seems to mean it. And then we made love all night and it was-“

“Argghhhhhhhhh-“

They both laugh, enjoying the red face on the Moto2 defending champion a bit too much, before Alex settles down again and lets the conversation in the front drift over him, not really listening and not wanting to, content to let the day sink in for a while and recharge a bit for the evening on the way. _She called me ‘amor.’_

*

 _So beautiful. And genuine. And nice. And just…almost perfect, I think. I think you might be perfect._ He laughs again as she nears the end of another story, dusk starting to come down on them and Alex now snoring off and on in the back, before swallowing down the words he wants to say and finding a few others that may do. “Nervous? Meet the parents?”

“Me? Never!”

 _That’s a lie._ He smiles to his left and gives her a look. “Sure…”

“Shh.” She winks across at him before shrugging slightly, smiling to herself and looking ahead again. “Not many people know me, so let’s pretend that I’m completely not intimidated by it.”

“Sounds ok to me.” _Well that avenue didn’t go far._ “Why don’t many people know you?”

“Um…don’t know really. I mean, it took ages for me to trust Alex, and honestly that was more because he’s Marc’s brother, and he has good guarantors.” She smiles back at him again before raising her eyebrows. “What?”

“You trust me then?”

“Yes, I trust you. In fact yeah maybe it’s a Rufea thing; friends with Marc and you’re on my list jeje.”

“Aww, you trust Marc then?”

“I do. Because Mila does, with her life. And Mila’s a much better judge of character than me.”

“Really? Because she’s marrying a psychopath.”

“Jaja maybe he is sometimes! Nah, she is a good judge. Other than Antoni, actually. At least the person I loved wasn’t a complete dick, I guess.”

“Ouch…” _The person I loved._ “He wasn’t?”

“No, he wasn’t.” She smiles over at him again, sadly and voice lower, before taking a deep breath and steadying her eyes back on the road. “He was almost perfect.”

 _I get the feeling this is one of those things that proves you do trust I’m a good person. Although I don’t know if you should._ “Almost? What did he do wrong?”

“Well I’m impressed no one told you, to be honest. No one told you?”

 _What?_ “No…?”

“Well he did everything right really, except the part where he, er…” _I’m really telling him._ “H-he died and left me behind.”

 _Oh God._ He stares at her for a second, now pulling into services anyway and silence descending strangely as they come to a stop, before he’s lost in the look on her face as she turns back to him. _Oh God._ “Oh.”

“Don’t look at me like that.”

“Like-“

“Pity-“

“That’s definitely not how I’m looking at you, I promise.”

“It’s ok I know it’s hard to know what to say-“

“It’s not pity, I promise. Just shocked. And sorry.”

“Everybody is-“

“I know.” _Don’t._ “I remember.”

 _I remember._ She locks her eyes on his again, Alex still completely asleep in the back, and frowns slightly. “You remember.”

 _So well._ “I, er…lost someone too. My mum. And I remember how annoying it is when everyone’s just hovering and no one can just…say the fucking words. Like not saying it makes any kind of difference to the fact that it’s true.”

 _You remember._ She takes a sharp breath at that and the way it’s said, swallowing down the emotion in an echo of what he’s doing, before her eyes flick to Alex in the rear view mirror and return to find his. “Exactly.” _You get it._ “ _Exactly._ ” She stares at him for another couple of seconds, silence coming back louder than when they stopped, before Alex stirs in the back and stretches, moment broken and both taking a little breath as they try and pull themselves back to reality. _What was that._

 _What was that._ He turns to Alex, smiling at whatever he’s saying about food or toilet or something, before taking an extra second in the car to let the guilt fade and walking after them, shaking his head to himself and trying to erase it. _I wish I could turn it off._

*

Marc: Did you do it on purpose

Tito: No like I said in the press conference, I had no idea he was there!?!!

Marc: Oh jaja, no I mean driving off with Lara

Tito: Oh, then no of course I didn’t

Tito: I can’t change how I feel but I’m not an idiot

Marc: You feel it then

Tito: Yeah. I never knew her ex died? God seriously I never imagined that

“He told her.” Marc finds her turn straight round and understand exactly what he’s referring to, as Hector and Jose both exchange a ‘what’.

 _Fuck._ “Right…why?”

“No idea…”

Marc: She told you?

Tito: Yeah she did, earlier before we stopped

Marc: Are you sat in the front?

Tito: Yeah, Alex was asleep

Marc: What are you doing

Tito: Feeling guilty as hell but acting like a friend to both of them. I can’t make it stop but I’m not doing anything, I promise

Marc: You know if you do and I find out I have to tell him

Tito: I know.

 _‘If’. ‘I know.’_ He rubs his hands over his face and shares another look with her. _You forgot the ‘never’._


	35. Aragón Part 4: "Crossfire"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Brandon Flowers is new writing soundtrack du jour so :D
> 
> So so sorry there's been such a massive break on this. And I'm nowhere near happy with this one but I need a kickstart to get back into it. I hope you like it and please let me know [also do this if it's shit. ;)]
> 
> Thanks so much for the love in the long break ♥
> 
> Now where were we....

It’s midnight before they end up alone again, Alex in the kitchen talking about something important sounding with someone after him and Lara have danced themselves a bit too tired, and Marc and Mila wrapped up in the middle of the living room, the central couple of a few as the Itunes shuffle creates an accidental ballad moment. Outside, in the back garden, Lara is on her phone as the door opens to reveal Tito, in search of a little fresh air and a little tipsy. _Oh. Yay? Or oh no._ “Hey…”

“Oh, hi.” She looks up and smiles, happiness to see him more than genuine. “Sorry if you were hoping to come out here and throw up in peace…”

“Jaja, nope.” He shakes his head and smiles back, now leaning next to her and feeling the customary slight raise in the speed of his heartbeat in this kind of proximity. “I’m not that person. Have to go home and do laps tomorrow afternoon, anyway.”

“Ah, well then maybe we can’t be friends.”

“Yeah I’ve seen the Instagram photos…” He grins sideways at her and then shrugs. “Nothing wrong with having fun and being yourself.”

 _Yeah ‘cause that’s so me._ “Hmm…”

“Did I accidentally start a deep conversation…”

“Jaja, er…maybe a bit? Although it’s one I live with in my head all the time anyway so don’t worry.”

“Ah, ok. You’re one of those people.”

“Pff. You mean I think?”

“Nah, I mean you overthink.”

 _Oh…well…maybe…_ “Can we pretend I laughed this off and I’m really straightforward…”

“Well I don’t know, do we pretend?”

 _Is there a ‘we’?_ “Um…” _How did this conversation happen._ “Well, no. Mostly? I’m the fun one you know, I’ll take every bet and be the last one standing at the bar…”

“Sure you are.”

 _What does that even mean._ “Am I not?”

“Well if you are you’ve not done a very good job of pretending around me…”

“Well maybe I’ve not been trying to.”

“Good.” He nods and slowly reaches out to take the cigarette packet from her. “Can I have one?”

“Yeah, of course.” _What’s happening._ The skin contact somehow actually fizzes. “What about hard work and dedication and everything…”

“Well…” He lights one and hands the lighter back, eyes leaving hers as their hands touch again briefly. “There’s not getting a massive hangover so I can test, and then there’s not letting yourself relax.”

“Ah, ok. Interesting. So what do you normally do to relax?”

“Laps.”

“Jaja, ok. So when you’re not doing laps you’re not relaxed?”

“Sometimes I am. When I think about doing laps or when I’m asleep I’m pretty relaxed. Also having sex, that’s quite relaxing…”

 _Now does that feel over a line because I’ve created a line because I need to or does that feel over a line because he’s trying to cross one._ “Same…”

“Jaja ok, ok…I really don’t need another run through of the details-“

“Jaja, nope…me neither.” _Oops…_ “I mean…” _I mean tonight the alcohol is showing the cracks instead of papering over them._ “I mean I think everyone knows enough now and it wasn’t even an interesting conversation the first time…”

“Ouch!”

“No! No, I don’t mean…um…I don’t mean he isn’t good in bed!” _Cringe._ “I just mean there is more to it than just sex, you know? For me anyway. That’s how we ended up here.”

 _For me, anyway?_ “Ah, ok. You trust him.”

“Depends which way you mean. Or…no, it doesn’t. I trust him, yeah. I trust him enough to have told him everything about me, which is a big thing.” _I told you too didn’t I. Right._ “And yes I trust he’s not going to cheat on me.”

“That last part sounds a little more unsure…”

“Maybe it is, sometimes. But I think that’s natural. Have you seen him?” She grins up at him and raises her eyebrows. “I’m punching quite far above my weight here. Although I probably weigh more than him anyway so who knows…”

“Ok, seriously? You’re the most beautiful person in the house tonight. Ok?”

 _Aww._ “Aw, thanks.” _Argh._

“Is everything ok between you?” _I’m going to hell._

“Yeah, I think it is again now. Before the weekend it got a bit shaky, but…I don’t know. When he’s in that mood, that one where he’s not realised he’s 19, I don’t know if there’s anyone else in the world I’d rather talk to. But then sometimes…”

“Sometimes…”

“Sometimes, honestly…it gets a bit frustrating. Life advice from Lara: don’t make the only person you’ve cared about since you lost the love of your life a 19 year old Moto2 rider.”

 _Which bit is the most important there._ “You did call him ‘amor’…”

“Jaja, I did. My mouth got used to saying it again, I think.”

“But.”

“Yeah…” She downs the rest of her drink and slides the cigarette packet back in her pocket. “But. You want to dance, King of Moto2?”

 _And it’s shut again._ “Hmm not sure how ready I am to embarrass myself…”

“With me? There is NO WAY to embarrass yourself, jaja. Come on.” She grabs his hands and pulls him away from the wall, realising as he does that she never meant back inside with everyone else. “Now what do you want to learn…”

“Tango.”

“Well I think we can have a go. Relax, though.” She massages his shoulders slightly before looking back up at him and smiling. “Everything is better when you relax.”

“Tango laps of the garden, ok.”

“Exactly.” She reaches back to crack open the kitchen window, making the music easier to hear, and then grabs onto him again. “Ok, first things first…”

*

“I think he can actually almost dance, now…” Roser smiles at her husband before motioning back at Marc. “Maybe all that money we spent on classes will finally pay off with a World Champion…”

Julia smiles back, laughing to himself before taking her hand again and pulling her into the middle of the room, a few couples of varying ages creating space for them, and putting his arms round her. “Yes I’m glad it wasn’t all a terrible waste.” They both glance to the right as the movement of Marc and Mila untangling slightly catches their eye and they watch the younger couple’s eyes lock and their son lean in for a chaste kiss. _That was us._ That thought catches them both before they look back at each other and smile, both thinking the same thing and aware of it, and Julia leans in to do the same. _That IS us._ “All I can say is I hope they get a journey half as amazing as ours, my love.”

“Urgh, look at these disgusting love birds!” Marc pokes his dad on the way past, catching Roser’s eye as his hand laces through Mila’s, off to get a drink and laugh echoing back as they leave the room, smile as wide as the room can accommodate. “So embarrassing.”

“Yeah, yeah. Go and propose again, son.”

“Hey.” Marc’s grin pops back round the door frame. “I only do it like…once or twice a week, ok?!”

“Sure, sure.” They share another smile before Julia looks back at his wife and shrugs. “There are downsides to doing a good job as parents…”

*

“You ok, babe?” Mila wraps her arms around him from behind, Marc having been stood zoned out at the sink. “Or are you just finally as tired as you should be…”

“Jaja are you complaining about my energy levels? Jeje.”

“Sometimes it does feel like I have a new baby to be honest.” She gives him a squeeze and then smiles into a kiss as he turns round and sighs contentedly at the contact. 

“Hmm…not going to bite that bait tonight…BUT…” He grins and the slightly red cheeks on her and shrugs. “Yeah I think it’s just weird being back here after so much has changed. Not bad, just weird. And also…” He motions behind him at the just-visible figures in the garden. “I don’t know what to do about that.”

 _Ah, shit._ “Well…I don’t think there’s anything we can do.”

“That feels like washing my hands of it.”

“Well, you know…it’s not your problem. Not _our_ problem. But then I know that doesn’t mean we don’t care about it or we can stop caring about it. But it is what it is and things will happen as they will. They’re 3 good people and if anyone does anything bad, it really must have been worth it. Trust me? I know.” She smiles faintly at that before making the point with a peck on the lips. “But I know it’s hard when you _know._ ”

“Exactly. I just…” _I just what._ “I just feel like I’m watching an avoidable train wreck and the person on the tracks is my brother.”

“Alex hasn’t been a saint.”

“Alex hasn’t been a saint. But Alex doesn’t deserve this.”

“We’re talking about it like it already happened.”

“I know.” They look at each other at that, expressions confirming too much. “I don’t think anything has happened. And I don’t think anything will happen whenever Alex and Lara are together.”

“You just don’t know if Alex and Lara are going to end up together.”

“I don’t.” _And also.._ He moves in a bit closer and lowers his voice, lips pressed to her ear. “And I don’t know if they should.”

 _Neither do I._ “I know what you mean.”

“They’re really good influences on each other as friends.” He moves away again slightly and brushes some hair behind her ear. “But they’re not this. Or that.” He nods back outside again at where the tango is now almost passable. “But it’s killing me that I _know._ ”

“You know if you tell him he won’t be able to not-“

“I know.”

“Well I don’t think Lara would say anything so maybe we could talk to her. Would that make you feel better?”

“I don’t know if that’s just like opening the door a bit further. If she’s not thought about it then it’s basically just putting the idea in her head-“

“If she’s not thought about it or nothing has happened, nothing will.”

“What counts as nothing?”

“None of those moments where you accidentally share something big.”

“You mean like driving up here together and sharing everything about yourself.”

“She told him-“

“Yeah, exactly.”

“Don’t take it out on me.” The tone had changed, frustration at both having different priorities in the situation. “Unless you have good reason to.”

“Well you obviously don’t care about Alex as much as Lara-“

“No, I don’t.” She stands up a bit taller, a bit further apart now, and frowns. “He’s your brother and she’s basically my sister. So yeah, maybe you’re thinking more about Alex and I’m thinking more about Lara. She’s been through enough without this.”

“So it’s fine for someone else to get caught in the crossfire.”

“Yeah, that’s exactly what I said. I said I didn’t give a fuck about your brother.”

“Mila…”

“What? I’m reacting to what you’re saying so if you want me to react differently maybe say different stuff.”

“I think it’s unfair to give someone a free pass to break someone’s heart just because it happened to them.”

“Fuck, what?! I think it’s unfair to call what happened to her having her heart broken. I think what you’re saying is unfair and not even close to the truth. And actually…I think I’m going to just go and fucking tell her.” She bites her lip, emotion bubbling up and Marc still more standoffish than they’d ever had before, before walking towards the door.

“Mila…”

“You know what you can do whilst I’m trying to make you feel better is imagine that I’m never going to walk back in here and then tell me if you think ‘heartbroken’ covers it.”

He feels even the tip of that iceberg of panic go through him before taking a few deep breaths and looking round the room, hurt and flash of anger passing quickly as it sinks in and his chest feels like it’s been hollowed out. _Ok maybe that’s the wrong word._ And then following.

“Can I just talk to you first?”

“No, go back inside.”

“Mila…”

“Yeah?” She turns back to him again, Tito and Lara now exchanging puzzled glances, before shrugging. “What?”

“I think we need to talk about this more.”

“I was trying to talk about it and you were being offensive.”

“Yes.” He nods and takes a deep breath, shoulders lowering slightly as he sees her relax at the admission. “Yes I was. Please don’t ever say things like that again, especially not leaving me in an empty room, ok?”

“Ok.” Deep breath. “Sorry. I just…you have to understand what happened-“

“I understand what happened and I’m following you out here because I don’t want to waste another few seconds fighting with you, ok? Now what are we doing.”

 _I have no idea but I guess we’ll see._ She accepts the apology with a little nod, not completely forgotten but enough, and her feeling guilty enough herself at that final sentence to try and redirect towards the whole point of the conversation again. “I’m going to talk to Lara and you boys are going to get a drink. Ok?”

“Ok…” _I don’t know how ok it’s going to be in a bit though._ He looks back at Tito and smiles, ignoring the puzzled frown. “Beer?”

*

 _Maybe this isn't a good idea._ "I need to talk to you..."

"I gathered." Lara smiles at her through a frown before taking out another cigarette and lighting it, passing one to her friend. "All ok? What was that argument about?"

"Hmm, yeah...that argument was kind of about this. And I don't really know where to start. But I'm ok." She notices the concern in time to backtrack slightly with the serious tone. "It's more about you really...and Alex..."

"Me and Alex? Why?" _Have you done something-_

"Because I know something else I think you'll want to know. About Tito." She watches the obvious _you're about to tell me he's cheating on me_ horror and disbelief fade into pure disbelief and confusion.

"Tito...?"

"Yeah. Something he told Marc a bit back that we didn't really know what to do about...if anything...or anything..." _Come on just spit it out._ "Basically, his exact words were 'I think I'm half in love with her..." _I did it. And I've no idea what that expression on your face means, for once._

"What..." _Tito. Tito and me? Tito wants me? Tito and me in the car feeling like it's just us-_

"Yeah. And he's not the kind of guy who would try and fuck anything up on purpose I'm sure but it's killing Marc to know and not say anything to you or Alex. Especially after the way you were just dancing..."

"What?!"

"Tango with Tito..."

"Yeah, tango with Tito where everyone kept their hands off each other and we had a good time-"

"And you're being very, very defensive."

She stares back at her for a few seconds, immediate defensiveness resisted due to irony, before letting the little reel of moments with the older rider play through her head. _Tito. And I just told him way too much._ "I just don't want you to think I'm interested."

"You don't have to lie, they're writing columns about my fiance being responsible for attempted suicide. It gets messy."

"I'm not lying."

"Keep saying it."

Another few seconds of staring. "Ok actually I'm going for a walk."

*

Alex: Where's Lara?

Marc: In the garden with Mila

Alex: Fuck, ok

Marc: Why?

Alex: Because I need to find her and talk to her

Marc: Ok?

Alex: No. I've done something stupid.

Marc: Right...how stupid? Are you ok? Where are you?

Alex: I'm fine, walking back now. Went to a bar on a random adventure

Alex: I kissed Dani

Alex: Fucking autocorrect I kissed DANIELA

Alex: I'm now way more sober and fuckkkk what was I doing

Marc: Oh God...right. Well...you're coming back now?

Alex: Yes and before you say anything I'm going to tell her straight away and apologise

Alex: And she kissed me, but I didn't pull away for a good 8-10 seconds

Alex: Bad, right?

Marc: Not sure I can judge

Alex: Hmm well I can and I can't believe how stupid that was

Alex: We were never even interested 4 years ago I don't know why we would be interested now

Alex: Especially when I have LARA.

 _But do you. And will you._ Marc looks up at Tito's face, patiently waiting for an explanation of the sudden text tornado, before shrugging and sighing. _It's really not up to me._ "Alex. On his way back. Just kissed someone else."

"What?!"

The expression says enough, Marc more worried his brother would be killed by his teammate rather than girlfriend. _Fuck._ "Yeah, he's going to tell her now and apologise. Don't get involved."

"I'll do what I want, thanks."

"Yeah, I know." Aware the tone had been a bit too overbearing, Marc takes another sip of beer before leaning forward to rest his forehead on the table and groaning. "Can everyone just be happy and no one get hurt, please...."

*

"Ok well I don't even know how that went." She looks at Tito, wondering if Marc's accidentally told him exactly what's going on from the look on his face, _although he looks like that a lot_ , before deciding maybe no. "She's gone for a walk. Where's Alex?"

"On his way back." Marc grimaces at the look on his once teammate's face. "After he says he's just kissed someone else and is on his way back to apologise..."

"Fuck." She lets that sink in, both her and Marc looking to Tito for a reaction and that firing the older rider's brain into gear as he looks back at Marc.

"You told her."

"Ok yes I did, I can't not tell her-"

"You told her everything?"

"Well...I mean...is there anything much more to tell..."

"And you've just talked to Lara."

"Yes..." She wilts slightly at the full force of the accusatory expression. "But not-"

"Not about me. Sure. Right well I think I'll be going then before anyone decides to tell Alex." He's already on his feet again, knocking back the last bit of beer, before pausing as he notices the eyes looking at him are now looking right behind him, feeling that sinking feeling spread through him. _Oh fuck..._

"Tell me? Tell me what?"


	36. Aragón Part 5: "Now She Knows"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you, and enjoy?? :/ ♥

_Oh, fuck._ The expression on his face, and Tito’s and Mila’s, is already enough to discount the idea of trying to fob his little brother off and the World Champion groans slightly and rubs his hands over his face, wondering what to do and avoiding the eye contact from everyone in a bid to make it go away, before Alex repeats the question again and Marc finds himself catching Tito’s gaze and asking the silent question. _So am I going to say it-_

“Nothing much. We were just talking about your girlfriend.”

 _Ouch._ The tone is more than clear, the older rider’s anger and general frustration at Alex just having kissed someone else very apparent, and Marc starts to open his mouth to try and calm it down before Alex seems to sense it and walks further into the room to be able to face his teammate, frowning and already on standby for whatever he’s going to say. “Oh?”

“So you remember you have one, then…”

Alex’s eyes go wide and teeth clench slightly as he looks back at Marc for an explanation again, his brother more frozen in horror than anything, before turning back to his teammate and raising his eyebrows. “I just fucked up a lot, I know. What’s it got to do with you?”

“Nothing, _nothing at all_.”

“Sounds like it.”

“Hey, guys-“

“Guys?” Alex frowns at his brother before leaning back against the unit and crossing his arms. “What exactly am I doing wrong here…”

“Nothing much, just getting someone to trust you and then betraying-“

“Hey, woah. I’ve made a mistake but that’s why I’m here to explain and sort it out. Where is she?”

“Your girlfriend? She went out.”

“Went out?! Is she ok?” He’s already pulling out his phone to try and contact her, a well-timed reminder of the fact that he really does care, before Marc nods and finds his voice again. 

“Yeah she’s ok, just went for a walk after we were talking. Clear her head I think.”

“Right…so anybody going to tell me what’s going on-“

“Well I don’t think there’s much chance you won’t find out to be honest, so I’ll just tell you-“

“Tito-“

“She went for a walk because Mila told her the truth about me, and how I feel about her.” He watches the shock start to appear on Alex’s face, his own jealousy and anger and frustration at how he knows how much it’s going to hurt when Alex tells her making the words a lot harsher than he’d intended, before shrugging helplessly and then heading for the doorway. “Nothing’s happened and I wouldn’t do that to you, but I love her. And now she knows.”

It takes a few seconds for Alex to process that, stood staring after him and too many things on his face to read, before he slams his beer down and starts after him, voice loud and ignoring everyone turning to wonder what’s going on, his teammate now into the living room. “What did you say?”

“I think you heard.”

“Don’t just fucking walk off after saying something like that-“

“Better than staying and watching you tell her what you just did.”

“I made a mistake, yeah. But it’s none of your fucking business-“

“Maybe not. Or maybe it is, because I love her, and you don’t.”

The music’s still on, but everyone is now staring and waiting, including Tito, regret at the phrasing starting to show through before Alex shakes his head.

“Oh well if you want everyone to be honest then fine. You don’t love her, you hardly fucking know her! And no, I don’t know how I feel right now. But I care about her and she cares about me, and if you think you’re going to-“ _God, you're serious._

“I wouldn’t do that to you.”

“Seems like you would-“

“ _I wouldn’t do that to you_. Besides, you’re doing a good enough job of making a mess of it all by yourself.”

“You don’t have any fucking clue what you’re talking about-“

“Really? Because from where I’m sat you have one of the greatest people I’ve ever met hanging on your every word and all you do is take it for granted. And when you’re not taking it for granted you’ve got your tongue down someone else’s throat-“

That makes Roser raise her eyebrows and look at her son, that not lost on Alex.

“You don’t know how it’s been between us because it’s only been us. You understand that don’t you? You don’t know what it’s like to fuck her and hold onto her and listen to her because you’re not her boyfriend. I am, and I’ve made a drunken mistake earlier tonight, that I’ve come back to explain. So don’t pretend like you know her or her past or anything-“

“You mean Joan? I know about Joan. YEAH. I know how much she really needs you to be that one person who isn’t going to fuck her around-“

 _She told him._ That makes Alex feel like he’s dropped his heart on the floor. _She told him?! Where and when and how-_ “What?!”

“When you were asleep, once you’d done with not greeting her at the gate and not acknowledging her in public and generally-“

“Tito I think we should all calm down-“

The older rider looks back at Marc, who is now in the room again and looking between both like a lost and cringing puppy, before shrugging and taking a deep breath, eyes back on Alex. 

“Look, I’m really angry at the moment because this is going to hurt her. You know why I care, now. But there’s nothing happened and I’m not trying to steal her-“

“She’s not a commodity-“

“Oh, I KNOW. Do you?”

“Yes I do, she’s my _girlfriend_. Because we care about each other to make it more than a casual fuck-“

“Yeah you’re not casual about her at _all_ -“

“Ok, you know what? I don’t even have to have this conversation with you. Just fuck off and stay the fuck away from her. Ok?”

“I’m leaving, don’t worry. But if you think you can order me around-“

“Yeah well now she knows how you feel I’m sure she’ll avoid you-“

“Yeah sure she will. Sure she’ll avoid me and everything we have in common and run back to you, even after you hurt her again and again-“

“You make me sound like some fucking devil. I got a bit overwhelmed recently yeah, and tonight I’ve made a mistake. But you don’t know the _half_ of it. And I don’t mean sex, I mean the _important_ things.”

“Like what?”

“Like none of your fucking business.”

“Sure, easy answer-“

“No, a private one between me and Lara. So yeah, it’s not perfect right now but if you think I’ve done anything other than my best-“

“Maybe that’s just not going to be enough.”

“Maybe it’s not. But it’s not for you to judge, is it?” Words quieter, somehow calming down and taking a few deep breaths, the younger rider sighs up at the ceiling for a second before shrugging and starting to turn back to the kitchen, show good enough for all the people who don't know him too well. “Whatever, I’ll talk to her and I’ll apologise and you can keep pretending I’m a terrible person. It was a _mistake_. See you in Motegi I guess.”

Weirdly, given the people listening and watching, it’s somehow Mila who moves first to follow him, making it to the back door before it slams behind him and catching it, heading after him into the back garden. Marc follows Tito, out onto the street outside and extremely aware of how public it is, cringing as he sees Lara round the corner of the street at the bottom. _Fuck._ “I think walking off like this would be a bad idea.”

“I think telling everyone what I told you in confidence was a bad idea.”

“I think it was a bad idea to tell me in the first place. You know it’s a bit complicated-“

“Yeah, I know it’s complicated. I didn’t know who else to tell that I trusted, so I told _you_. And you told Mila, and Mila told _Lara_.”

Marc watches him, suddenly realising he has no idea she’s behind him, and wonders if this is another betrayal or would seem that way. “Trying to help. We saw how you were dancing, and I felt like-“

“To be honest, I don’t care what you felt like. I trusted you with this, I really did. And you know why? Because I thought you’d know me well enough to know it wasn’t about trying to steal her or ruin anything. I just had to say it out loud. It was driving me insane.”

“But her best friend is my life and she’s my brother’s girlfriend. You understand-“

“I do understand a bit, yeah. But what did you think was going to happen-“

“Between you and Lara? Too much.” _Take a deep breath._ “Because I see exactly why Alex is so threatened. Ok?”

“Don’t-“

“I’m not saying it to get back in your good books. I understand-“

“You understand I love her.”

“Yeah, I do. And I understand how that feels…”

“You believe me.” _Wow._ The older rider stands up a bit taller at that, not having expected it at all; more having been braced for warnings and clichés.

“There’s an article coming out tomorrow that rips me apart because I fell in love with the ‘wrong’ person. And I know how little control I had over that.”

“I don’t want to hurt-“

“I know, I _remember._ ” He lets that sink in before taking a deep breath and pretending he’s just seen her walking towards them, her wise enough to leave enough distance for it to seem real, and watching the two of them look at each other. _I’m going now._ “Be careful, ok?” He nods at Lara before heading back inside, desperate to watch the outcome of the meeting but managing to thread his way back to the kitchen and through the back door, so much more to say but really, in the end, not his words or his web to untangle. _Oh, God._ Mila looks up first, arms round Alex wrapped up in a sun chair, and nods to confirm the tears on his brother’s face. _Oh God._

“Has he gone.” 

“Yeah…”

“And Lara?”

 _I’m sorry._ “I think she’ll be back in a few-“

“Ok.” Alex brother sits up, untangling himself from Mila, before running his fingers under his eyes and taking a deep breath. “Well now I don’t even know where to start.”


	37. Aragón Part 6: "Night Changes"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah I used 1D again. I'm sorry but :/ what can I do? ;)
> 
> Thank you so much I hope it's not too terrible!! ♥ I'm tired and a bit ill. Enjoy....?? :)

“Can you leave us-“

“Already doing it.” She whacks a kiss on one brother’s cheek before getting to her feet and repeating the gesture on the other, looking back from the door to catch Marc’s eye in a little gesture of solidarity; the fight, or whatever had almost been a fight between them, forgotten. 

“Ok. Tito’s on his way down the road now, and Lara’s on her way back. I think they’re talking.” He watches the flash of panic cross Alex’s face before sitting down next to him and squeezing his knee, looking out across the garden and hoping he could get the words out right. “Which they are entitled to do. One thing I’ve learned this year is that sensible decisions aren’t always the best, and maybe he shouldn’t have told me. Maybe I should have told you what I knew. But we’re all adults here and no one person involved is a bad person. Ok?”

“Ok…”

“So I don’t really know how it is with you and Lara, but I do know some things. I know she deserves more than what you’ve sometimes given her. But I also know you, and I know you let her know you and that’s how you ended up more than just…sex or whatever it was before. But this is serious, you know? I know you know that, and I know that’s probably what’s spooked you, because you can’t just suddenly decide you want out and not cause any damage. But you knew that on the beach when she told you everything and you had the choice. You made the choice, and now you have to live with it.”

“I know that-“

“Let me finish?” He says it kindly, but definitively, and feels a flash of affection as he brother does exactly that. “You’re not me, I know that. And you’re not like a ‘normal’ 19 year old or whatever that even means. But honestly, you know what you’re doing. And before all of tonight, and before Tito…you fucked up. Quite badly. I know it can happen because I’ve done it – stupidly – and Mila’s done it. Not so stupidly, because that was with me? But you know what I mean. It happens. Now I just don’t know whether you were the ‘me’, or the ‘her’. Because mine was a mistake, and hers was the right decision. You see what I’m saying?”

“You mean did I do it because Lara’s not right or did I do it because I’ve been an immature prick.”

 _Poet._ “Pretty much.” He grins sideways at him, Alex sitting up and sighing, hands rubbing over his face, before the younger rider hangs his head slightly and shrugs.

“Honestly it was just a mistake. I don’t want to lose her; it wasn’t like some subconscious excuse so she’d be able to get rid of me.”

“Ok. And you’re going to tell her.”

“Yes.”

“Ok, and what do you think she’s going to say?”

“I think she’s going to cry and that makes me not want to tell her.”

“Now there I know exactly what you mean.”

*

“Hi…” _Of all the words-_

“Hi.” The older rider looks down at her, for a split second, and then past her back up the road, to where there would hopefully be a taxi appearing shortly. “I’m sorry you heard all that…”

“All what?”

 _Don’t make me say it to your face._ “You know what.” He psychs himself to look at her before managing it and smirking slightly at his own expense. “I’m not trying to ruin anything. I didn’t tell him so you’d know. I just…” _Love you. Somehow._

“I know.”

“You know?”

“I know you’d never try and ruin anything. Especially not with Marc and Alex. And especially not with me.”

“Good.” _Stop looking at me like that._ “Then I don’t think there’s much else I can say.”

“I don’t think there’s much else needs saying.” She smiles at him, slightly sadly, before tentatively holding out her hand, watching the reaction and wondering what her own face is saying, until his hand takes hers and she steps into the hug, relaxing for the first time in quite a while and breathing in deep breaths; aware anyone could walk out and see, aware it’s really not a good thing to have done, and also aware that the alternative of watching him walk down the street like nothing happened seemed worse. “I don’t know what to do.” _And you’re the worst person in the world to say that to._

 _“I don’t know what to do.”_ That, words so simple and very understandable in so many ways, makes his heartrate amp up to race pace. _There’s more than one option._ “Do?”

“Yeah. I don’t know what to do. You know…you’re the worst person I could have said anything to earlier, aren’t I?”

“Maybe.” _We’re talking, we’re in a hug and we’re talking._ He moves slightly, arms going round her a bit less nervously, and then finally something clicks and he rests his chin on top of her head, gently, giving her a squeeze as they relax. “But that’s ok, I wasn’t looking for dirt-”

“I know.” The words are slightly muffled, vibration of her lips moving humming over his chest. “I wouldn’t have given it to you if you were. There’s a difference between collecting information and collecting ammo, I know.”

 _There you go._ “I know. And you know what?”

“Hmm?”

“That’s why I love you.” _Cheesy. But so true._ He pulls away slightly, moment judged well and having to end at some point, before taking both her hands in his and keeping his eyes on them. “I’m going to go home now, Lara. You have my number, you know how I feel, and you know I’m your friend. For anything, anytime. You can call me.”

“O-ok.”

“And you know that means you can trust me. But it also means Alex can trust me.”

“I know, and no.”

“No?”

“No…” She leans up to press a kiss on his cheek, hands squeezing his and then turning and walking back to the house. “I’m not a cheat either. Night, Tito.”

“Night...”

“Please be careful.”

“Careful?”

“Careful. On the way home. When you get up. On track. _All the time_.” She watches it click in his brain why she’s a person who says that with complete seriousness, and what that means about him for her to have felt the need to say it to him, and gives him a little nod. _I don’t know what to do but please be careful._ “Text me when you’re home.”

 _Text me when you’re home._ “Tonight or tomorrow-“

“Both.” _Don’t-_ “Please?”

He nods, turning as she does and heading off down the street, before ducking into a garage doorway to lean on the door and stare at the sky for a second. _Do you ask him to do that? Does he do that? Does he understand how it feels-_ He takes a deep breath and forces his shoulders to relax before carrying on, finding the taxi where it was meant to be and sliding into the back seat, staring out the window and flipping his phone in his fingers. _Does he understand how I feel?_

*

“Hey.” She walks out into the middle of the pool of light, Marc and Alex both turning to look at her, before the older brother gets to his feet and claps Alex on the back.

“Hey. I’ll give you some peace.”

“Thanks.” She asks the _is he ok?_ with enough worry to Marc make feel a little lightning bolt of pain at what she’s about to be told, him kind of bluffing through it and kissing her on the cheek, for some reason, as though that’s not both a bit weird and also now going to make it obvious that he knew. _Great._

“Hey babe…I missed you…?” She sits down next to him, Alex still staring straight ahead after having shared the first look of recognition, and squeezes his knee, leaning on him and smiling to herself through closed eyes as his arm goes round her to pull her in, kiss pressed against her shoulder.

“I-I missed you too.”

“Where did you go?”

“Um, went to buy a few things, with some old friends. And…” _It’s never going to easier; it’s probably only going to get harder._ “And one of them, someone I have a bit of history with, Daniela? We were alone, waiting outside. And she kissed me.”

 _Oh God._ She hears that, not having expected anything like it, and sits up straighter again, shrugging him off slightly unconsciously and gritting her teeth. _You really chose your moment._ “What?”

“Um…yeah. She kissed me, and I kissed her back. Briefly. Then I stopped her, and I asked her what she thought she was doing, and I reminded her I had a girlfriend.”

“Oh.” She sits there, almost zoning out at the conflicting emotions waging war on each other, before taking a deep breath and hearing it come out more ragged than not. _Oh this hurts much more than I-_ “Oh.”

 _Oh, just ‘oh’._ “I’m really sorry, I’m not that guy, and I will never, ever do that to you again-”

She sniffs a bit, feeling it start to sink in, before he carries on and the words start to sound further away. _It’s so broken-_

“Lara please don’t cry, I made a stupid half drunk mistake and even then it only took me a few seconds to realise how stupid I was being-”

“Don’t-“

“Don’t cry baby, please.” He finally manages to look back at her at that, eyes round and wide and filling up, and somehow is allowed to lace their fingers together and kiss the back of her hand. _Please-_ “Don’t leave me. I don’t deserve you but please don’t-“

“We got so broken.” She closes her eyes and takes another few breaths, trying to wish away the image, before fixing her eyes back on his and swallowing, hard. “How did we get so-“

“Because I keep fucking up.”

“Yeah, you do.” She laughs slightly, sadly, sniffing and using her other hand to catch a tear, before nodding and squeezing his hand slightly. “You know on the beach-“

“I made the right choice but I’m not doing a good job of it, I know.”

“Alex?”

“Yes?”

“Do you love me?”

“I…” He falters, hoping that’s not the be all and end all of it and the words afterwards will be listened to as well, before pulling her back in as he’s allowed to and squeezing her hand, voice low. _Please don’t leave me._ “Honestly, I-I don’t know. I just know I’ve never cared about anyone this much before. And I know the thought of having ruined everything makes me feel sick. And I know I really, really don’t want to lose you.”

 _I know that much too._ “O-Ok.”

“Ok?”

“I feel like that about you too. And tonight I think that’s enough.”

“Enough. For-“

“I don’t know what for, but I really want to go to sleep with my boyfriend.”

“Same. I, I m-mean-“

“I know what you mean. I…” _Deep breaths._ “I just don’t want you to feel like you said yes in that one moment and now you regret it-“

“The only thing I regret is the bad things.”

She looks sideways at him, studying the expression for a few seconds, before nodding and closing her eyes as he leans in, immediately surrounded and trying to forget about everything else, no idea at all whether this conversation should have ended this way or whether the one outside should have ended the same; wondering whether it hurt enough to prove anything or something else; now only sure that the bed upstairs with their name on is the only place that’s going to feel peaceful enough to try and take a deep breath. Everything is too much and consequently seems unimportant somehow, like an invisible barrier between how she's meant to be reacting and the reality. He pulls her up into a hug, a perfect reflection of the same she’s just been wrapped up in with his teammate, and they stand there a few minutes before he's tilting her chin up for a chaste kiss and heading them back towards the house, hand holding on a bit tighter and not stopping until the bedroom door is shut behind them. The quiet gives way to a kiss as she nods at his nervous pause in front of her, finally ending up spooned under the sheet, trying to block out the noise of the half-party downstairs, and pulling her phone out to check. She holds the screen up to read it, knowing he can see it, and replies to the message before turning back to say goodnight with a kiss; leaving him awake to let those words roll round and round in his brain, wondering why he was allowed to see them and why he thought he shouldn't. _Don't, please. Please don't._

Tito: I’m back. Goodnight, and I hope you’re ok. Xxx

Lara: Thanks for letting me know; and I'm ok. Goodnight x


	38. Tomorrow Never Knows

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title from the Beatles :)
> 
> Thank you! ♥

“Peace.” Marc grins, mood buoyed again after watching his brother and Lara slope off together and neither looking like it was for a murder, and shuts the door with a slightly too-loud whack, turning back around and leaning against it with a lazy grin. “You know I thought winning races was supposed to be a good thing…”

“It’s a good thing.”

“Hmm, or it’s a thing that makes other things less bad?”

“That too.” Mila smiles back, patting the bed next to her and letting the grin grow until Marc almost bounds over and hits the mattress next to her. “Oh no…”

“NO?”

“You have energy…urgh…” She grins again, neck already attacked by a very wet and sloppy kiss, before running her fingers through his hair and rolling over to meet him half way, leg wrapping round him to pull him in. “Sorry about what I said in the kitchen babe, I just needed you to get it so you don’t think she’s evil.”

“I get it. And that, honestly.” He nods and nibbles her bottom lip, hand making a deliciously slow journey down her back, before moaning into her mouth as she shoves her hand into his boxers, mouth going slack. _Oh it’s one of those nights-_

She smiles into the kiss, putty in her hands already, and teases him for a while before pinning him to the bed and slowly starting to pull off his t shirt, him just lying there staring up, almost starstruck, before she grinds down on him and jolts him back to life, elegance getting lost for both as they wrestle out of their clothes and he turns them over, evil sparkle back in his eyes and her response a kind of stoned groan as his hand traces down over her stomach and between her legs, wet already and hips pushing towards him as he teases, thumb brushing her clit as his fingers push inside, slow and definite and not heading for any kind of goal, her tongue in the kiss reacting to the movement of his hand. “God, Marc…”

“I know…” He moves the kiss down over her jaw and onto her neck before his lips end up pressed against her ear, her hand tangling in his hair. “Long weekend.”

“Long…weekend…”

“Do you want-“

“Please.”

“Didn’t hear you-“

“ _Please._ Please please please-“

He smiles to himself, her breath catching as his thumb flicks her clit, before feeling her nails dig into his back and lining himself up, her hands clawing him towards her before he buries himself and feels that familiar gasp of hot air on his cheek, and tight, wet heat close around him. And then the shiver that rolls down his back like thunder as they start to move and she does that thing she always does, and says it the way only she ever has. “ _Marc…_ ”

*

_Morning baby. I’ve gone home for a bit. I think I need to just think about some things. But I don’t want you to think that I’ve run off or that it’s some kind of crazy ‘Alex, you have to chase me!’ situation so I thought I’d write it down._

_I care so much about you, honestly it’s like you’ve turned me back on ;) jeje. And I know sometimes I’ve maybe been a bit impatient when you’ve been doing moto things, and I’ve not been perfect. But you know that’s because I like you so much and because being around you always makes me feel happier. You’re a massive dork but I guess it could be worse :P [assuming you didn’t buy a husky when I was asleep ;)]. You know also that sometimes I need a bit of help. And hopefully me saying that ‘out loud’ makes you realise how much I care about you because that’s a very big thing to admit. Nobody except Mila usually knows these things. And sometimes I know maybe it’s a bit overwhelming because I remember having PANIC ATTACKS at commitment ;) however much you care about the other person, but lately I’m not so sure whether it’s because it’s commitment, or because it’s just too much. And honestly it hurts a lot to know what happened last night._  
_I’m really glad you told me, though. And I don’t trust you any less, if I did I wouldn’t be admitting I wasn’t a rockstar ;). I’m going to go away for a little bit I think and visit some friends, and give us a bit of space._  
_But I’m still your girlfriend and I’m still going to miss you and I’m still looking forward to when you [hopefully] come and stay before the flyaways, and I’ll probably call you tomorrow._  
♥  
_Hope you understand,_  
x L x 

*

Alex: I understand and I’m really sorry x

Lara: Ok, I know. And that text from Tito last night I just wanted you to see it so you know you can trust me. Does that make sense? X

“Last night, she’d asked him to text her when he got back, and she didn’t hide it when she replied and they said goodnight.” _Good luck sharing the garage with one of your best friends whose name you can’t even say right now._ “She’s asking if I understand she did it so I know I can trust her.”

“Ok…” _Alex, Alex is talking to me. When SOBER._ “Do you? Understand?”

“Um…kind of?”

“What don’t you understand?” She turns back to him and motions at the coffee maker, him giving her an appreciative nod through frowning at his phone. 

“I understand why she showed me.”

“Ok…?”

“But I don’t understand why there was anything to show me.”

 _Ah._ “How much did they talk, before?”

“I don’t know I didn’t realise I had to pay attention.”

 _Ouch._ “You don’t have to pay attention to anyone except Lara, she won’t cheat on you. With anyone.”

“Hmm.”

“Alex?”

“Yeah?”

“I think you have to deal with the fact that they’re friends.”

“Friends. Where one of them is in love-“

“Yeah, friends where one of them is in love with the other. Tito can’t help how he feels. She won’t cheat on you, and he won’t try to steal her.” She looks up at Marc, who has just come into the kitchen, to double check that in lieu of knowing Tito that well. The confirmation little nod is one she mirrors for Alex’s benefit. “I know it probably feels horrible-“

“It does. It feels like I want to hire someone to follow him.” The younger Marquez sighs and droops down to lean his forehead against the top of the table. “And like I want to just say the words and see if she says them back…”

“Do you feel the words-“

“I’ve never felt like this before so I think I do. It’s not like you two or anything but maybe everyone’s different-“

“I think everyone is different. But that’s not going to fix everything-“

“I didn’t realise it was broken-“

“It’s not broken.” She shakes her head as she gets up, done with her toast and taking her plate to the sink, rubbing his hair on the way past. “It just needs a bit of care and attention.”

“Hmm.”

“Also in case it was sending you crazy too, the friends she’s gone to see in Bilbao are gay as fuck.”

That cracks a slight smile, and makes him sit up again, meeting her gaze. “Ok.”

“Bit better?”

 _Bit better, yes I think so._ “Yeah, actually.” He nods before downing the rest of his coffee and getting to his feet, stretching and yawning. “Thanks. I think I panicked a bit when I woke up in bed with a letter….”

“Yeah I can understand that.” She looks at Marc in a kind of _I’ll explain in a second_ expression as he frowns at her, before they watch Alex go and she peers into his cereal bowl. “Is that all you’re having because you got quite a work out-“

“Nah this is first course.” He grins as he pours the milk in, sending her an imaginary kiss, before smiling as she scoops him into a real one. _Good morning, I agree._ “Don’t worry, I’m big and strong.”

They both blush slightly as Julia coughs behind them, either pre-empting any embarrassment or already subjected to it they’re not quite sure, and turn to greet him as the shower going on upstairs signals conversation is safe.

“So Lara’s gone…”

*

Tito: I'm back in Almeria. x 

Lara: Good :) I'm in Bilbao or almost :)

_What._

Tito: Last minute plans?

Lara: Yeah, need a bit of space.

Tito: I hope you don't mean from me. I'm really sorry how everything came out. 

Lara: No I don't mean from you, or from Alex. It's more some space for me, everything got so different so quickly. How are you?

Tito: Ah ok, I understand that. Sometimes I just drive round to Tarifa and disappear for a few days :) I'm ok thanks, quite embarrassed but that's happened before ;) :/ you?

Lara: Jaja aww there's no need to be embarrassed if you mean about me. Really. And I'm ok thanks, and there's someone on the train wearing a Tito cap :)

Tito: I'll try and remember that then when I cringe. And ooh! :D

Lara: Jaja please do. Yeah she's really quite beautiful too ;)

Tito: Well she won't be the most beautiful on the train, because that's you. Have fun x

Lara: Shhh ;) :P Thank you, you too. Be safe x x


	39. Three Instead of Two

“Hey. Sorry I’ve been out of touch, but I have finished all the designs for the toilets. Hashtag glamour.”

_“Jaja, hello! Awesome ok, will be good to get work started before we fly off to be honest. How’s it going? Are you ok?”_

“Yeah I’m ok thanks. Went out last night…thought I was more mature than I am…but also younger…”

_“Jaja God Lara we’re not 40.”_

“I know, but…you know.”

_“I kind of do know. So sore head?”_

“Little bit. Also some Instagram photos I’m worried Alex will judge…”

_“Nope, he was here when you were posting and he loved them.”_

“Ok. Good! Did I caption them-“

_“If you mean the picture of the bed then yes…”_

“Jaja urgh. I didn’t even check yet. I’m still in bed. With Alejandro. They had a massive fight which is now all fine but Jack went out for breakfast. To bring it back I mean. I think we all slept in the bed.”

_“Well he was a bit insecure so I did tell him they were gay.”_

“Ok, good. Thank you! Right…I will send the stuff over by email and then call Alex in a bit, unless they’re training?”

_“Marc’s doing a LapsForLife thing and I think Alex is going to wash his bike but later.”_

“Awww. That’s my baby.”

_“It is. He’s a bit lost without you.”_

“What?! We’re not together all the time-“

_“Nah but now he’s all unsure if he can text you and stuff…”_

“Ah, ok. Right well I’ll rectify that like…now. Ja?”

_“Stop pretending you speak german and get back to your double sausage sandwich.”_

“Jejejejeje. Ok, I will. And I’m stealing that quote.”

*

samosahermoza: Sausage sandwich in Bilbao lmao. :D credit @bailadoramila for the joke and @alejacko for the cock ;) 

alexsegre12: @samosahermoza jajaja ARGH get out the bed, my eyes!

samosahermoza: @alexsegre12 jejeje miss you baby *besitos*

alexsegre12: @samosahermoza you too, I’m going to call you now as long you can free your arms from the gays :P

*

samosahermoza: Yup @alexsegre12, look! Hands free gays…. :D

alexsegre12: WHAT ABOUT THEIRS

samosahermoza: @alexsegre12 jejeje honestly it’s just a cut out dress. I mean…not that I didn’t get changed yet #argh. My phone hasn’t rung :P

alexsegre12: @samosahermoza just bleaching my eyes, brb

samosahermoza: @alexsegre12 I spose eyes are better than that other thing :P jajajaja

alexsegre12: @samosahermoza I’m blind and deaf now.

samosahermoza: @alexsegre12 well you usually do ok by touch..so…

@alexsegre12: @samosahermoza jejeje. Miss you, I’ll call now. ♥

*

“Hi.”

 _You answered as quickly as I wanted you to._ “Hey. So Bilbao looks horrific…”

 _Alex. Little and not so little Alex, and I’m smiling already._ “Jajaja er…it’s really good. But I do miss you.”

“I miss you too. And I’ve been thinking…”

 _Please say you mean-_ “Wow, ok. Do I like the sound of that?”

“Depends what you’re going to say. I’m going to ask you if you want to…well, no. I’m going to say I would love you to come to either all or some of the flyaways.” He waits, breath held, before grinning to himself at the sound of her voice. “But it’s up to you…”

“Seriously…”

“Seriously. Bed’s quite cold without you and I miss you kind of an embarrassing amount…”

“Aww babe…”

“Is that a yes…”

“Well I have to stay a while to sort stuff when Mila’s away…”

 _Oh._ He feels his heart drop a bit and tries to ignore quite how disappointed he actually is, before taking a breath to talk again and getting immediately cut off.

“But I can probably do at least Sepang, maybe PI. Is that ok?”

 _Oh._ He grins to himself, checking the clock on the bedside table, before nodding and then realizing she can’t she that. “That sounds amazing. And sounds like I’ll have more chance to try and make it up to you.”

“Make it up to me? You already-“

“No I didn’t. I said sorry. But I really mean it and I’ll show you. Ok?”

 _Perfect._ “More than ok. I’m coming back tomorrow, too. Do you want to get dinner?”

The lifeline makes him grin, and finally, finally relax. “Um I dunno…shall I ask my mum if I can stay over..? Jeje.”

“Jejeje. Feel free…”

“Lara?”

“Yeah?”

“I mean it you know. I miss you.”

“I know babe, I miss you too. And, er…just wondered. Did you talk to him?”

“You mean…Tito…”

“Yeah.”

“Hmm.”

“Not talked properly-“

“I don’t have anything to say right now, so no.”

“Ok, sorry. I can understand that. Right I’m going to go because I need to shower. If you’re really nice to me I’ll take photos…”

 _Lara, me and Lara. Still here._ He grins to himself and nods, again, catching the slight blush in his cheeks in the mirror as he sits up. “I’m going to be the nicest ever-“

“Ok. DEAL. Bye baby…”

“Bye. Baby. I…” _love_ “Miss you.”

 _What were you just going to say-_ “You too. Bye.”

*

bailadoramila: New routine. Choreography by me, @samosahermoza and a few ideas from @marcmarquez93 ;). #fighter #cheesybutamazing #XtinaFTW

@samosahermoza: Told you it would work @bailadoramila!! Amazing :D jajaja I can see those ‘ideas’ ;)

@marcmarquez93: @samosahermoza :P 

samosahermoza: @marcmarquez93 yeah exactly ;)

@marcmarquez93: @samosahermoza shhhhh ;) jajaja

*

samosahermoza: Lil bit of Argentina in Bilbao tonight with @alejacko :D [Alejandro, obvs ;)]

@alexsegre12: ♥ does Jack not dance?

@samosahermoza: not yet ;) we’re getting there! Not as fast a learner as you and @titomeria though ;)

*

 _Now do I act normal or do I act…not._ He stares at it for a few seconds before sighing and shrugging to himself. _Well you have to share a garage._

@titomeria: @alexsegre12 @samosahermoza jaja so I wasn’t too terrible??

_Could have worded that a bit differently._

*

 _He dared._ Alex stares at it for a second, half of him wanting to take it completely the wrong way and half wanting to do the opposite, before investing in the version of his friend that he’s sure it was meant to seem like. _Just you._

@alexsegre12: @titomeria @samosahermoza I’m glad I wasn’t the only one who felt out of their depth! How many times did you almost drop her?

*

 _Wow. Ok._ He smiles and nods to himself, olive branch very real, before wondering what he can reply that isn’t the slightly harsh truth: _not many._

@titomeria: @alexsegre12 enough jaja. Harder than coming from last on the grid tbh

@alexsegre12: @titomeria well we wouldn’t know ;) @marcsegre17 is he telling the truth?

@marcsegre17: Fuck you both :P but yeah he is ;) @titomeria @alexsegre12

*

Lara: You talked. :)

Tito: We did. And I phrased that so wrong!

Lara: It’s ok, benefit of the doubt for friends ;) 

Lara: I’ve forgiven him for his mistake…

Tito: I realised. I wish I hadn’t been so harsh, I just…

Tito: Ok late night honesty…it killed me because he has what I want, and he’s making mistakes that I wouldn’t. I just hated the idea of you getting hurt. Does that make sense?

Lara: Lots. I hated it too ;) but it’s ok, he’s a bit younger and I know it’s a bit crazy for him sometimes. Are you going to tell him that?

Tito: Maybe the bit where I was harsh

Tito: Probably won’t mention the fact I think he was a dick

Lara: Tito…

Tito: I’m his friend but he was a dick. But I don’t want to fall out, especially given it’s my teammate, my best friend’s brother, and the woman I love.

Tito: So I will try and talk to him. How mad is he?

Lara: I don’t really know, he’s not talked about it

Tito: Right…

Lara: But if you want my honest opinion, most of my ex boyfriends would have hit you for that

Lara: And I do think he’s right. It was his mistake but it affected me, not you [if you know what I mean]

Tito: Ok. I do. I will try and sort it out. 

Lara: For me or for him…

Tito: Everybody.

Lara: Ok :) night Tito x

Tito: Night. I miss you x

*

Tito: Can I call you tomorrow and try and talk about it?

Alex: Are you going to apologise?

Tito: Yes

Alex: Then ok, I’m free from 3.

Tito: Ok. I’ll talk to you tomorrow then

He types a reply, grits his teeth again, and puts his phone down on the bedside table. _Yeah ok, whatever._

*

Marc: Are you awake…

Alex: Yes…?

Marc: Right well you know how my wife-to-be loves sushi…

Alex: Oh no…did it finally happen?

Alex: Also ‘wife to be’ urgh :P jaja

Marc: :P um…yeah. It finally happened.

Alex: Furry friends or no furry friends

Marc: She’s a bit tipsy so she said yes to joining the table, which everyone except Pol was annoyed about ;)

Marc: Now I think she has a fucking dogwalking date tomorrow with Pol Espargaro and I don’t know how this became my life

Marc: Aleix is equally amused though jaja

Marc: The restaurant manager is actually looking a bit concerned with the volume

Alex: Jajajajaajajaja 

Marc: Apparently we’re going to Instagram it :/

*

marcmarquez93: Found some familiar faces in the restaurant tonight!! #Andorra #Sushi @PolEspargaro @AleixEspargaro @bailadoramila 

*

Marc: Did I sell it

Alex: You look like you’re having the time of your life jajajaja

Marc: Is it bad? :/

Alex: No it’s good, it’s just funny :D

Alex: I’m happy with my girlfriend and everything but THAT DRESS.

Marc: I KNOW. I KNOW, AND I’M HAVING TO SHARE HER WITH ESPARGAROS.

Alex: Also Laura looks cute ;)

Marc: Not answering that ;)

Alex: Jajaja :P is Pol as drunk as he looks?

Marc: Yeah!

Alex: Shit.

Marc: I KNOW.

*

Marc: Please can we go home

Mila: Soon :P

Marc: Please though

Mila: Soon

Marc: But that dress is ruining the crotch of my jeans ;)

Mila: :P

Marc: That’s not an answer

Mila: They’ll think we’re rude, texting :P

Marc: Pol is rude looking at my fiancé like that :P

Mila: He can look all he wants but he can’t touch ;)

Marc: I want to touch, please let me touch

Mila: That bad, really?

Marc: That GOOD. I can already feel my tongue running over all the little bruises…

Mila: Cruelty

Marc: I’m going to the bathroom now…

Mila: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Marc: Yeah you’ve never done that before :P ;)

Mila: You’re going to ruin my date with Eina

Marc: can’t we just get our own Eina and leave the Espargadog out of it

Mila: :O you would get an EINA?!

Marc: Come to the bathroom and find out ;)

*

“Please can we get one-“

“I don’t think you’re in much position to bargain to be honest…” He grins evilly as one hand pins her wrists to the wall above her head and lets the other slowly start to unzip the dress, eyes locked on hers until they close as the dress falls to the floor and he leans in to press their mouths together, urgent enough but not too much, tasting the mojito that jolts so many memories from that first time they’d done this back into his mind. He nips her lip as her hands grapple with the buttons of his shirt, finally feeling her fingernails rake over bare skin for a few seconds until his jeans, and then his boxers, are pulled down to his knees and he pushes his hand under the fabric of her underwear to get a little control back, both lost in it for a few seconds until a whispered _quick, we have to be quick_ sees her underwear ripped down to join his. He buries himself in one thrust, both hitting the wall hard enough to make them swear and then grunting at each other as he starts to thrust, hand pinning her wrists to the wall again and swearing under their breath, as quietly as they can, as the soft _ah_ gets higher and higher in pitch and he lets her hands go to pull him in, fingers redirected to between her legs and listening to the sharp hiss as she bites her lip to stay quieter and obviously overdoes it. She opens her eyes again, one arm snaking round his neck and pulling him into a copper-tinged kiss, before her eyes roll back in her head as his fingers start to move faster and faster, finding a good rhythm and pounding them into the wall until she loses control a bit and it gets louder as she shudders, fingernails clawing at his back under the fabric of his shirt and muscles clenching around him to send him groaning over the edge with her, fist pounding into the wall as they collapse against it and each other. _Wow._ “Fuck, Marc…”

He pushes himself slightly off the wall to find a kiss, underlining the moment with a quick reminder, _this was fucking but these are still my feelings_ , before they end up leaning forehead to forehead for a few seconds to get their breath back. “Fuuuuuck.”

It’s another few seconds before they’re cleaning themselves up and hastily pulling clothes back on, kisses stolen in between slightly guilty but enamoured and amused looks, until she looks almost the same as when they went in there and turns back to him.

“We can get a dog, though. Yeah?”

 _Sex for dog._ “Seems like a good deal to me…”

“Marc…”

“Jeje.”

“It would be work though, so it’s not just…casual…you know?”

“Well…” He pulls her in so they’re eye to eye and moves some hair behind her ear. “That depends on why you want a dog.” _If you get me._

“Ok…”

“So why do you want a dog?”

“I love them. I want a little wolf.”

“Ok.” He leans in to press his lips against her ear and gives her a squeeze. “What about to practice for a little Márquez…”

“You mean-“

“I mean not yet, but…” He leans in for another kiss and laces their fingers together. “So we’re a family of three instead of two.”

 _A family of three instead of two._ “A family of three instead of two sounds amazing.”

“Then yeah, let’s get a dog.” They let that sink in for a second, mood so different to the desperation of a few minutes before, before walking back out into the restaurant and back over to the table. “You are _not_ talking it for a walk with Eina though.”

She starts to protest so he whacks a kiss on her cheek and gives her a squeeze as they reach the table, looking back over and taking a sip of his drink. “EVER.”

 _But we're getting a dog and kind of a family and I'm not even scared._ "Mmm kay." She takes a sip of her own before turning back to Pol, eyelashes fluttering. "So tomorrow where do you want to meet?" And then scowls as Marc's hand pinches her under the table. "We could have lunch, too..." _Ha._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know? Sorry I feel like it lost something for a while but I'm trying to get it back! :/ ♥


	40. Me, My Wolf & I

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ♥

“Morning…”

“Morning.” She smiles across the pillow and into a kiss before snuggling into him and sighing to herself. “Sleep ok?”

“Yup. You?”

“Yes. I’m very excited about Eina.”

 _Oh joy, you haven’t forgotten._ Marc groans, smiling into the pillow and taking her with him slightly as he rolls into it, before taking a theatrically deep breath and then looking back at her. “You’re really going to have lunch with Pol and his dog.”

“I’m really going to have lunch with Pol and his dog.”

“But we’re getting our own though…yeah?”

 _Oh you actually want to._ “You actually want to?!”

“Um, yeah…I mean…as much as I love having no reason to have to get up and leave the bed…” He smiles into another kiss as she runs a hand down his chest, “…I kind of like the idea of…” _Smooth._ “Taking responsibility for something.”

 _Can’t resist-_ “Wait a sec and let me write all this down for the Yamaha fangirls-“

His mouth drops open at that, grinning soon after, before pinning her to the bed and shaking his head in mock disgust. “Oh you didn’t…”

“I think…” She grins evilly before wrapping her legs round him and pulling him in. “…that’s their line…”

“Right Miss, that’s it.” He wiggles his eyebrows and grins to himself at the shriek before diving under the covers and pulling her legs apart. “Open wide…”

*

 _Ok maybe it’s a little weird._ She smiles and waves, slightly giddy but more from the sober reality and the dog than the Tech3 rider walking towards her, before accepting a greeting kiss on the cheek and looking down at Eina. Beaming. “Hey baby! I’m Mila.”

“This is Marc’s…girl-“

“Fiancé.” She grins up at him before ruffling behind the husky’s ear and feeling her heart melt. “Oh my God Pol she’s amazing…”

“She IS.” He beams back at her, pleased after so many months to have finally found someone who seems to worship his little wolf as much as him, before they start walking, and he passes the lead over, and smiles as she grins and takes it. _You’re so nice, you really are a lovely person. Sober and drunk._ “Please don’t lose her.”

“I would never!” _You’re so nice, you really are._ Mila grins again, laughing as Eina starts to head off and knowing where she’s going, before smiling back at Pol and feeling herself relax. _Remember that whole majority of your life where you were your own person and made your own decisions._ “She’s way too precious to lose.”

“Finally someone agrees!”

“Jeje. I was kind of wondering whether I should turn up to be honest, but…” _Explain explain, eek._ “Well, I mean…I guess it could seem a bit weird?”

“I know what you mean.”

“But I think we’re secure in the knowledge that I love Marc, but I’m not him. Yeah?”

“Yes. Definitely-EINA. NO.” He makes an ‘eek’ face as the dog attempts to piss on someone’s bike, before smiling again as she does what she’s told and they both look back at Mila. “I mean me and Marc are ok nowadays I think? Unless you know he hates me or something-“

“No, he doesn’t hate you jaja. He doesn’t hate anybody.”

“Not even Valentino at the final corner in the gravel-“

“Jeje. No, especially not Valentino. But yeah…you’re fine as far as I know. I just…I mean it would be very weird if he was here. But it’s not like we’re on a date-“

“Ach, Mila. Breaking my heart here…” The Catalan rider clutches his chest theatrically before laughing, nodding at the sentiment and carrying on. “I know, it just so happens we – us two- didn’t use to hate each other so we can appreciate our mutual love of dogs.”

“Exactly.” She nods and smiles again before feeling warmth spread through her as the Tech3 rider opens the gate to the park for her, everything still a bit weird but getting better, and they watch the husky bound off as she’s let off the lead. “And I kind of miss friends, to be honest. It’s a bit weird up here when he’s training and stuff, there’s no one around. I mean…Alex comes up a lot, obviously. And we go down to Barcelona and Cervera a lot, and travel and everything…but this is the first time I’ve left the house _on my own_ to do something _I organized._ Does that make sense?”

“It really does.” _Have I ever been this jealous._ “I’m warning you now though, I may have to flirt with you a bit.”

She pretends to mull that over before focusing back on Eina as she brings the stick back, throwing it again and smiling to herself. “Well maybe I can live with that. As long as it’s fun only.”

“Believe me, I’m pretty jealous right now but I’m jealous because you’re obviously pretty serious about him.”

“Somehow I am. Rich and good looking, you know…”

“Yeah you seem like the type of girl that cares about money and looks.”

“I’m glad that’s obvious.”

“So obvious. And that whole speech last night about hard work and passion was just a red herring.”

“Yeah, I like him to think I’m interested in his career and personality and stuff but really I’m so bored with him, all the time. All that effort and focus and spark is so boring.”

Pol laughs at that again, nervous he’d pushed a bit far and feeling himself relax. “Maybe Marc isn’t so bad.”

“Pff don’t let Jorge hear you say that!”

“Jejeje. Are you this rude to him? To his face?”

“Marc? Sometimes. Only when he deserves it. And right now that’s not very often. By which I mean never.”

 _Awww._ “Have you set a date yet?”

“Date?”

“For the wedding.”

“Oh! No. Not really thought about it to be honest. Bit busy being publicly ripped apart.”

“Ouch. Yeah, I er…I’ve read some of it.”

“Not very nice.”

“Not very nice.” He frowns slightly at the change in mood, brief as it is but cloudy expression real, before they both smile at Eina again and throw the stick. “They’re wrong though.”

“Hmm?”

“All the shit they’re writing, it’s obviously pretty wrong.”

“Not sure you know me that well yet. Maybe I’m a terrible money-grabbing whore-“

“Maybe you are.” He shrugs before smiling again and shaking his head. “Or maybe you’re a nice person with a, er..modern job? And Marc’s a good guy whose job makes everything a bit difficult.”

“Wow, Pol Espargaró did you just say Marc’s a good guy?”

“Hey, we’ve never exactly been friends or anything like it, but off track we’ve never had a problem. Just rivalry, that’s the way it goes. I think it’s fairly obvious though that no one deserves this.”

“This.”

“Finding someone like you and people bringing it down.”

 _Aww._ “Honestly it’s been pretty hard.”

“I can imagine. But you’re ok.”

“I think I’m ok. And I think Marc is ok. Sometimes it worries me that I don’t know that for a fact.” _Woah._ She takes a deep breath at that, aware she definitely shouldn’t be talking to _this_ person about it, before shrugging to herself. “But we’re doing our best and on track everything is ok, and with the pole school everything is ok. And we’re happy when we close the door.”

“That’s the most important.”

“Definitely.”

“Have you asked him?”

“Hmm?”

“Asked him if he’s ok?”

“Um…not for a while.” _I need to stop talking._ “I think we both decided at some point to just ignore it and focus on each other. And that’s working pretty well.”

“Ok, sorry I didn’t mean to pry.”

“No, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to talk about all this-“

“No, it’s ok. Really. Maybe a bit weird, but then life can be, eh?” He smiles at her again before they both cringe at Eina chasing a pug, calling her off and back to them, and then turning round to head back the way they came. “I was so jealous, you know.”

“Of Marc?”

“Yeah. I mean, getting Stoner’s seat at Repsol Honda straight from Moto2? That’s insane. And everybody love…loves him-“

“Loved.”

“Hmm. Maybe, I don’t know. I don’t know how the fans are taking this really, but you know what I mean. The golden boy, so far above the rest of us.”

“Hmm, not so much. At least, not anymore.” _And I did that._ “So you’re not jealous anymore?”

“Maybe not of that part. I used to think that would be amazing, being up there. And I’m sure it’s got good things to it, but now it just seems like it means you have further to fall.”

 _Further to fall. So, so true._ She lets that sink in before nodding again. “I guess so. The golden boy. The golden boy and the cheating pole dancer.”

“Ah, so you did cheat then…”

“Yeah.” She nods, shrugging and not proud but nothing much else she can say. “Yes I cheated, and yes he knew I was with somebody else. More than once. I did try though.”

“Try?”

“Try to convince myself I hadn’t been in love with him from the second I met him.”

“Ah.” _Aww._ “And the other guy-“

“The other guy fucking deserved everything he got and did to himself.” _Ouch._ “I mean…sorry. I just mean-“

“I read your side of the story, and having met you I more than believe you.”

“Oh.” _Oh._ “Well…still though, that was a bit harsh.”

“Maybe it could seem like that if you’re not interested in facts.”

 _Wow, ok._ “I hope so.”

“I think so.”

“But anyway…jealousy’s gone now?”

“Maybe there’s still a bit.” He grins before shrugging and nodding at her face. _Exactly._ “Seems a bit unfair for him to beat me to a factory bike _and_ a wife…”

“Jaja aww. You’ll get there.”

“I hope so.”

“I think so. Which is going to be weird because by then we’ll be proper husky friends and I’ll probably be married to your biggest rival…”

 _You like me. You like me and I’m very glad about that._ “Jeje, well…I hope we are husky friends. And even more that he is my biggest rival, to be honest. Puts a bit of perspective on everything so far really.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean maybe it’s not so bad being beaten when the person beating you is rewriting history.”

 _Oh. Wow._ “Oh. Ok. Well, yeah…I guess I know what you mean there. But then there are the aforementioned downsides to that…”

“Yeah I’m not so sure I like them to be honest.”

“You shouldn’t, but at least he beat you to it.” _Go on, dare._ “Again…”

Pol splutters slightly, grinning to himself and whacking her on the arm slightly, before giggling and finding himself forced into a nod. “Pfff…well…”

“Well…”

“Well…” He flounders around a bit longer for something to say, grinning and still a bit red-faced, before his gaze shifts to looking past her and falls into an ‘eek’. “Well, Eina is taking a shit.”

She laughs at that, genuine and warm and turning to look before wondering why she'd want to see that and turning away to leave the poor pooch some privacy, before they both end up stood in front of the dog, staring down.

“I told him I wanted a dog.”

“Now you’re reconsidering...”

“More reconsidering who would do _that_...”

“Ah. Yeah maybe put him on shit duty jeje.”

“Jeje, I would love to. Plus you know it’s kind of practice for kids, so if I train him well early on, that’s a good precedent set...”

 _Woah._ “Seriously?!”

“What?”

“Kids?!”

“Oh. Yeah, kind of. Testing out how we deal with shared responsibility for something other than orgasms.”

He goes red, laughs at that, and then pulls out the bag, cheeks still burning and everything tense, in the best way. “Well that sounds, er…serious…”

“That’s what Alex said. But that just makes me worry neither of you take orgasms seriously...”

“Please stop.”

“Ok well that’s my first tip, because the only thing you have to not do is stop-“

“Argh, STOP.” He grins again, mess now deposited in the bin, and claps his hands over his ears. “I really don’t need lessons, I promise!”

*

Marc: I have a surprise for you ;) ♥ 

Mila: You didn’t…

Marc: What should we call her? ♥ _Media content in this message_

Mila: ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHH MY GOD ♥ SHE'S MY QUEEN

Marc: She'll have to be my princess, sadly.

Mila: ?

Marc: You're my queen. ;) #cheese. ♥ love you, come home now please x x

Mila: I love you too and I'm on my way. ♥


	41. How To Win #HuskyFriends and Alienate People

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ♥ 
> 
> Sorry it takes me longer to reply, but I appreciate it so much and I'm trying! ♥
> 
> Now Marc...with a puppy... *doom*

bailadoramila: We have a new member in the family!! Welcome Xuxa, we love you ♥ pic.twitter.com/kjvgdsb

@polespargaro: @bailadoramila wowww!!! Already? ;) #twolittlewolfs

@bailadoramila: @polespargaro jaja yes already :P yes they should meet!!!??

@polespargaro: @bailadoramila jaja. Yes!!! #Huskyfriends

bailadoramila: #HUSKYFRIENDS!!! :D RT @polespargaro: @bailadoramila jaja. Yes!!! #Huskyfriends

*

Pol: Are you going to the flyaways??

Mila: Hi this is Marc, yeah she is :)

Pol: Ok…is she driving or something?

Mila: Jaja exactly, sorry I didn’t mean it like…in another way 

Pol: Ok ;) well I’m free this weekend if you want to pass that on

Mila: Don’t wink at me, Espargaro!

Mila: ;). Ok she says Saturday morning?

Pol: Sounds good, 930 same place?

Mila: She says it sounds good

Pol: Ok! Good name too :)

Mila: Thanks! We were going to call her Lupita but you stole that :P

Pol: Jaja you should have! They are amazing I’m so glad Eina will have a friend!!

Mila: What if they hate each other..

Pol: Then they’ll have to be mature about it ;)

Mila: Jajaja, ok. See you soon mate, we’re here now

Pol: Ok, hope the food’s good!

Mila: How do you know what we’re doing?

Pol: Er..the time?

Mila: I’m not telling you where we are. I can’t go through that again.

Pol: Fuck off and eat :P

Pol: ‘mate’

Mila: Jajaja :P will do. 

*

_It’s 3 o’clock._ He’s not sure if his parents know or suspect that 3pm is an important milestone in the day, but they certainly notice him notice, maybe wondering, before Alex’s phone goes and he takes a deep breath. _You’re on time as always._

Tito: Are you free?

Alex: Yeah.

His face flashes up, a stupid photo of both of them from a Dribble Dots thing, and makes Alex smile to himself, slightly sadly, but maybe just the perfect thing to have forgotten about and been reminded of.

“Hello.” He gets up, leaving the room quietly and listening to the response, before sitting down in the back garden where, he realises, he’d already talked about this particular subject enough, and answering ‘yeah’ to the questions he’s asked; nice questions, the type to check he’s ok to talk about it now.

_“First of all, I’m really sorry for the way I acted.”_

“Ok…”

_“It wasn’t really anything to do with me, I know that. It’s up to Lara whether she screams or not and I had no right.”_

“Ok, well…thanks.”

_“I’m really sorry how this turned out, too. I didn’t tell him so you’d find out, you know? I told him because it was driving me crazy and I had to say it.”_

“I know.” _Deep breath, we can do this._ “I know it wasn’t a plot or anything. I know you wouldn’t do that. And I can kind of understand it. The other way round I would have been frustrated at me, too.”

_“Ok. That’s what it was, frustration. It’s hard.”_

“You really mean it-“

_“I’m sorry but I really mean it. And it’s really hard watching you with everything I want.”_

“And watching me fuck it up.”

_“You haven’t though, have you? Fucked it up?”_

“Honestly mate, I’ve no idea. But I’m sat in Cervera watching someone else tango with my girlfriend in Bilbao, so…”

_“He’s gay.”_

“Aren’t we all.” He laughs at his own joke slightly, the older rider joining in and breaking some of the tension, before he takes another deep breath and nods to himself. “I don’t know how this is going to be now. You can understand it’s hard to not be paranoid.”

_“Yeah. I do. But then it’ll just be us in the garage and we-“_

“Oh.” _Shit, yeah._ “Um…Lara’s coming to PI and Sepang…”

_“Oh.”_

_So you’ve not talked to her about it then, ok._ That is somehow a big relief. “I don’t know…I mean, like I said I don’t know how it’s going to be but I appreciate the apology. Ok?”

_“Ok. And, er…thanks for telling me. And you know, it doesn’t have to change too much, I don’t think-”_

“You’ve felt like this for a while-“

_“Honestly, yeah. I didn’t really realise at first, but…I don’t know. I’m sorry though, I didn’t want-“_

“No, I know. I didn’t want a girlfriend and Marc didn’t want a wife. Things happen. I just…I just wish I didn’t know.”

*

 

6…: This is a bit weird but I think you’re friends with my fiancé now and she’s not spent time with many other people lately

“Sounds like it might be Marc?”

_And what do I say to that._ He passes the phone to Aleix and Laura for them to read before making a little ‘eek’ face. _Did it finally happen and you got jealous._

“Sounds like half a message to-“

It beeps again, proving the point, and he smiles before passing the phone back and they mirror him.

Marc: This is Marc btw, sorry. But anyway, does she seem ok? I mean…I don’t know what you know but she seems happy?

Pol: She seems like that yeah but I don’t know her very well yet obviously.

Pol: Also I think she wonders that about you, too.

_This is weird._

Marc: Really? Although I guess if I’m trying my best to smile she is too

Pol: Yeah. I guess so. But you should probably talk to each other

Marc: Yeah tried that, I’m now sat in my house alone

Marc: Texting my fiancé’s new best friend Pol Espargaró about if she’s happy

Marc: I should fucking know

Marc: Why don’t I know

Marc: Right sorry I’m putting the wine and the phone down now. Thanks. Don’t tell her?

Pol: You should tell her. No problem though, hope you’re alright

Pol: Where did she go?

Marc: For a run. It’s been a bad week for random abuse.

Pol: You know you shouldn’t read that shit

Marc: Yeah I don’t anymore. But I’ve got a bit more practice.

Pol: Yeah I can imagine. Sorry :/

Marc: Thanks though

*

_Awww my God._ Back from another run, the ‘I’m home’ dying on her lips, she stops in the doorway to the living room at the sight on the sofa. Stares a few seconds, taking it all in, everything suddenly hitting her at once and flashbacks going from Antoni to tango and touring and New York and Montreal and flashbulbs in the airport, to Lara and Alex and Tito and Marc talking to his brother outside when he thought no one could hear, Marc who’s somehow changed so much but it still himself absolutely, Marc who wrapped her up on the bed in New York and did everything right, sleepy Marc on the train at passport control, Marc that first night in the bar unravelling her straight away, Marc who’s the one who proposed once, then a few more times; Marc who ripped the first dress off as eagerly as the second; Marc whose eyes were full of so much doubt on that first night in the house when, honestly, everything had changed completely. Marc who brought home a princess for his queen and had fallen even more in love with her than Mila had. Marc who saw a big reason behind that. Marc who’d chosen carpet with her on the phone, carpet that now covered the floor in the dog’s bedroom, because although Xuxa slept in their bed, of course the dog needed a room, like it wasn’t quite a dog and was never treated like one. Marc, now fast asleep with a husky puppy lying plonked on his chest, both his and her eyes closed and breathing as steady as his. _I love you so much I wish that’s all that mattered._

She takes her phone out to take a picture, too perfect to not record the moment forever, before gently sitting next to him and feeling both stir slightly but not wake up, taking the opportunity to snuggle into him and feeling his arm go round her automatically, before Xuxa’s eyes open and she turns to look at the new intruder.

“Hey baby, it’s only me. Are you comfy on your daddy?”

The dog yawns and stretches, settling back down facing Marc again, and she feels her heart melt all over again.

“Know the feeling, little one. He’s a very good pillow isn’t he?”

That makes Marc twitch slightly, corner of his mouth turning up into a smile and game up, eyes opening and turning his head to look at her before a kiss. “She’s very comfy on her daddy and we’re both very happy mummy is home.”

_I love you._ “Sorry I just had to-“

“I know, I saw the message.” He laces their fingers together, one particularly nasty and specific tweet, or more twitter essay, having been sent earlier, before scooping up Xuxa and pulling Mila in, ending up lying on his back on the sofa with her curled round him and the dog back on his chest, father and princess now staring at each other, both captivated. “She has no idea her mother is such a horrible person, look. It’s amazing. It’s almost like she’s only judging you on her experience of you or something…”

“Marc don’t-“

“Don’t ‘don’t’.”

“I just can’t-“

“Yeah, you can. You totally can, because look.” He motions round the room slightly with his free hand, careful not to move too much, before squeezing her hand in his other and nodding. “Nothing has changed.”

“But-“

“Yeah I know.” _That was a bad choice of words._ “I know I thought it would all be gone now. But really, I don’t care. So if you feel bad because of me-“

“If I had a more normal job though-“

“Then it would more be aimed at me and how I stole you from _such_ a great guy, I know. And I’m sorry it’s not, but I wouldn’t change you for the world and neither would anyone else who knows you.”

“Don’t.”

A different don’t, him hearing the change in tone perfectly and holding onto her a bit tighter, before she sniffs slightly and nods. “Thank you for my wolf.”

As intended, that makes him laugh slightly, chest moving up a bit and Xuxa’s eyes going wide and paws splaying slightly at the unexpected change in the tide, before he nods into her hair and drops a kiss there. “Yeah I only got her for you…”

“You seem to hate each other.”

“We do, we’ve not been getting along at all. Lying here staring at each other, all snuggled and warm…” He pouts at Xuxa as the dog sits up, stretching again, before they both laugh as she unsteadily wobbles a few inches before toppling into the gap between them, the subsequent noise of disapproval making them look at each other in glee before leaning into kiss, knowing it’s a massive overreaction in so many ways and a massive rehearsal in others, eventually pulled apart as the puppy gains some traction and ends up sat on Marc’s head, words coming out muffled.

“I think she likes me!”

_Think it’s a bit stronger than that._

*

@MillieD_44: What a bitch!!! Now trying to get @polespargaro, @bailadoramila?! #Huskyfriends urgh

Mila: I’m sorry, you shouldn’t talk to me in public.

Pol: I like the irony

Pol: Only one bitch in that tweet ;)

Pol: #huskyfriendsforever?

Pol: #twobitches 

Pol: Sorry I’m a bit tipsy, but honestly it’s more than fine, people can be stupid

Mila: Still, don’t get involved.

Pol: My dog loves your dog now, way too late :P

Mila: :) don’t pity me, Espargaró :P

Pol: Yeah being friends with nice people and nice dogs, such pity :P

Pol: Go and hug that other guy and don’t be stupid.

Mila: Home alone. Maybe the pity is more self.

Pol: Oh dear. Well I would offer to come over but then that would be weird for him to come home to

Pol: I mean, the sex would be expected but the property damage…

Mila: You’re an idiot. I feel like I’ve known you forever :P

Pol: Jaja same. Well, one bit :P you alright though?

Mila: Better now cheers, #perspective

Mira: Did you see Xuxa ‘dancing’ on my Instagram?

Pol: I DID. Think my comment got lost in the fangirls and hate

Pol: Although I do fangirl over your dog

Mila: Eina will be so jealous

Pol: Yeah look she hates me _Media content in this message_

Mila: AWWWW. Will Xuxa grow up to be nice? :/ 

Pol: I think she’ll do ok, somehow ;)

Mila: :P don’t, it’s crazy!

Pol: Maybe, maybe not. I see it ;)

Mila: Are you planning to adopt a child next? ;)

Pol: Jaja yeah definitely!! Like 6 or 7 from different continents, then going to marry Brad

Mila: You should be more specific than a first name… #Tech3Wedding

Pol: URGGHHHH jajajajaja nooo!!!

Mila: Jaja. Right he’s home now. Thank you for keeping me sane.

Pol: Anytime, bailadora. Say goodnight to your little wolf from my little wolf

Mila: Marc says ‘night night Eina’ then I think is almost asleep already

Pol: Jaja ew I didn’t mean him :P

Mila: I know but his face was funny :P

*

Alex: Me and Tito talked, all a bit better

Alex: How do I deal with paranoia?

Marc: Good. :) and well, you just have to keep reminding yourself that you trust her, I think

Marc: I don’t really know; Pol isn’t a big threat ;)

Marc: Shit sorry I don’t mean Tito is, the opposite. I just mean I don’t know

Alex: Great save. :( urgh. Plus side I’m going to stay at hers tomorrow and she invited me

Marc: You know she forgave a big thing quite quickly, I think she’s in quite deep too :P

Alex: True. Gah I keep forgetting I was such an idiot if that makes sense

Alex: Now all I can think about is Tito

Alex: Well, you know what I mean

Marc: Was going to say, this is quite a revelation ;) :P

Alex: Jaja :P when can I meet Xuxa?!

Marc: Well she’s staying with mum when we’re away so we’ll be bringing her down :D

Alex: Is it cute…

Marc: SHE ;) :P [and YES]

*

Lara: You ok?

Tito: Yeah small crash training, fine. How do you know?!

Lara: Instagram, fool :P

Lara: But good :)

Tito: Ah yeah. I keep forgetting you’re on the private one too :P

Lara: Pff :P

Tito: You back home now?

Lara: Yeah I am :) 

Tito: Have a good time?

Lara: Yeah was good I think. Good to be back though. And I thought you should know, I’m coming to PI and Sepang…

Tito: I know, I talked to Alex. Sorry never said that, it’s not perfect but my apology was genuine and accepted. Ok?

Lara: Yeah more than ok. 

_So much more than ok. More than the other way around would have ended up? More than…more?_

Lara: Are you back up here before you all go to Japan?

Tito: Yeah, tomorrow

Lara: Do you want to have lunch or something?

Lara: It’s a bad idea and I don’t know how I’d explain it and I don’t know if I would explain it but it would only be as friends and nothing else, you know that.

Lara: But I don’t know if it’s going to be weird when we see each other again and I don’t want to do that on a race weekend in Australia

Lara: I don’t want you out of my life though and I’m worried that’s what’s going to happen

Lara: Not because he’d make me choose 

Lara: Just because I feel guilty talking to you

Lara: And I’ve had some wine and this was a bad idea but I needed to know you were ok

Lara: Don’t ask me why I feel guilty, please don’t reply now and goodnight x

*

“Hey. Sorry I’m late-“

“Don’t. Bed?”

“Bed. No sex today. But where’s the dog.”

“I hope those trains of thought weren’t connected…” She grins as he laughs, eyes open again from where he’s splayed out in the middle of the bed, and then starts taking off his shoes. “Bed time for babychamp I think.”

“Hmm. Bedtime for babychamp.”

“And Xuxa’s in the bottom of the wardrobe in a Munich.”

“Awwww God! Does she fit?!”

“Yes she fits. Hang on.” She puts his shoes on the floor before bending down in front of the wardrobe and gently removing the shoe containing the puppy, ferrying her back over so Marc can see.

“Awww it’s so cute it hurts!”

“I KNOW.” She puts the shoe on the bed, the dog taking the hint and bounding off onto Marc’s chest again, before putting it back where it came from and kneeling over him, undoing his jeans and managing to pull them off without disturbing them too much, before he pulls her down and scoops the bundle of fur onto her, doing the rest himself and ending up snuggled under the sheets with Xuxa, both peeping out at her.

“Look. Mummy has the best ass in the world.”

“Hmm…”

“Mummy is a fool for not believing it.”

“Hmm…”

“And look! Mummy’s getting in bed with us!” He grins at her before turning the puppy back round to face him and raising his eyebrows. “How lucky are we?!”

_How lucky am I._ “I want to marry you, you know.”

“Well you said yes-“ _Where did this come from-_

“I did and I always will. We’ve not talked about it.”

“I didn’t want to push-“

“No, I know. Sorry I’m not making any sense.” She takes a deep breath before snuggling down in front of him and running her fingers through his hair; Xuxa disappearing briefly under the covers before breaking back through and going to settle between them. “I mean I want to marry you and I want to set a date if you’re ready.”

_Wow._ “When I asked I was ready, babe-“

“Ok. So…soon?”

“How soon?” _Oh my God._

“One of my old friends who doesn’t want to know me anymore got married in Bali.”

_Oh my God._ “You mean, like…Bali now…”

“We’re going aren’t we? For the Satu Hati thing-”

“Yes.”

“So we could-“

“We will.” _God please._ He pulls her in, kiss deeper and hands running down her back, before they end up forehead to forehead and staring at each other, sudden unexpected end to the evening making them both smile a lot more than they’d expected a couple of hours earlier. “If you want to, we will.”

“I want to.”


	42. Motegi: Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bit worried this one's gone quiet...thoughts? Feelings? Disappointments?? Let me know?? ♥
> 
> Thank you ♥

**Sunday**

_I think I know her well enough now. Do I know her well enough now? Is that weird? Would it be weird? Is it weird anyway?_ “Mila?

Sitting on the sofa in Pol’s house, Lara and Aleix cooking in the kitchen and dogs curled up together on the rug in front of them, she lets her head fall to the side to look at him and raises her eyebrows. “Yeah?”

“Are you ok?”

“Yeah?” Frown. “Why?”

“Um…you seem quiet. And tired.” _What is a polite way of saying ‘you need to sleep for a week and eat well’._ “I don’t want to-“

“I’m fine.”

“Ok…” _She is going to hate me._ “It’s just-“

“Not now, yeah?”

“Ok…” _It’s just that your fiancé thinks the same thing-_ He flounders around for something else to say before an overexcited advance war party of beagles bound in, huskies both very done with them and kind of sighing in unison, announcing what the Tech3 rider’s brother confirms soon after.

_“Ready!”_

_Maybe it will be better when it’s Marc asking instead of me._ He watches her go, hair swinging behind her and tangoing around Pippa and Zuki, who are now on a swift reverse, and shrugs to himself. _I’ve really not known you very long, and even I can see a difference._

*

**Monday**

“Hey.”

_“Hello! You ok?”_

“Yeah…”

_“Talk to me…”_

“Um…I’m fine. Well no, I’m exhausted but good.”

_“But…”_

“But.”

_“Did something happen-“_

“Not really.”

_“Mila, talk to me. Where are you? What happened?”_

“I’m at home. I’m fine. But I’m not finished.”

_“Oh.”_

“And the builders had a delay and can’t start until Wednesday.”

_“Oh…” Please no-_

“I’m going to change my flight.”

_“Oh. Ok? Ok, yeah ok no problem. Um, when?”_

“I’ll get there after practice on Friday. I’m sorry baby I know-”

_“No, it’s ok. It’s really ok. If you’re ok and that’s all it is-“_

“I will be. I promise. And I’ll miss you like hell and I’ll tell Alex to hold your hand on the plane.”

_“Jaja ok. I’ll miss you too. I…” Can I send my mum up there please. “I just…you promise you’ll talk to me if-“_

“I promise. I absolutely promise. I know it’s shit timing.”

_The shittest. “It’s ok. I think in our lifetime there are going to be hurdles. A few days later to Japan is something we can manage, I think.”_

“Love you, Marc. A lot.”

_“I love you too. You’d better not be late to our wedding.”_

“I think I’ll manage to be there by then.”

_“Ok, good! Right I’m sorry I have to-“_

“I know.” _Same._ “See you soon.” She sighs, looking over at the dog mat in the corner and realising that’s empty too, before pulling herself up and heading for the kind of studio they’ve set up in the garage, or half of it, running her fingers over the closest dirt bike to her route and stretching in silence. _Remember though, this is a few days now. It used to be all the time._ Starting the music, going through the motions for a few minutes, before pressing record on the camera and forcing herself into it, stress slowly slowly dissipating.

Mila: Slow song tonight but I finally nailed that part of the routine. I’ve emailed it. x

Marc: I just saw it. You blow me away sometimes. X go to sleep now babe, please. You’re up at 7.

Mila: Just a few more minutes and I will. :) x how’s Xuxa, any word?

Marc: My mum is pretending she’s irritated but actually completely in love with her. ;) ♥ and no, not a few minutes. Now. Shower. Breathing exercises. Call me if you need me. 

Mila: Ok. 

Mila: I always need you though. ♥ wish I could explain.

Marc: What do you mean?

Mila: Sorry bad wording. I mean I wish I could ever let you know how lucky I feel to have you ♥

She smiles slightly as the phone lights up again, ringing this time, before taking a deep breath and putting it on speaker as she stares herself down in the mirror and starts removing make up. “Hey.”

_“Hey. Good day?”_

“Not bad. Tell me about yours. Good to see Dani again?”

 _Distraction, ok._ “Yeah really good. And he asked after you. We had a funny moment earlier actually, getting to Atocha and…” _Distraction._

*

**Wednesday**

_**Marquez arrives in Japan alone, rumours about Espargaro grow** _

marcmarquez93: Arrived in Japan, visiting Honda with @26_DaniPedrosa :) pic.twitter.com/tcyva 

*

PolEspargaro: Amazing day today with Yamaha! #SemakindiDepan! pic.twitter.com/bvcvb

PolEspargaro: @bailadoramila @marcmarquez93 this is really awkward guys… :/ ;)

bailadoramila: @PolEspargaro @marcmarquez93 jajaja sorry I don’t write it ;) cuddle each other? I’ll be there soon!!

PolEspargaro: @bailadoramila @marcmarquez93 well now it’s definitely you writing it :P ;)

bailadoramila: @PolEspargaro @marcmarquez93 jajajaja well not sure what to say to that tbh..

marcmarquez93: @bailadoramila @PolEspargaro wish that had been true one tweet ago

bailadoramila: @marcmarquez93 @PolEspargaro jajaja :P 

PolEspargaro: As you can see, this situation is very complicated. ;) @bailadoramila @marcmarquez93 

marcmarquez93: Get away from my future wife!! ;) RT @PolEspargaro: As you can see, this situation is very complicated. ;) @bailadoramila @marcmarquez93

*

@PolEspargaro: Sushi time @AleixEspagaro @RickyCardus88 @laurinette41 @arturvilalta @valeraalbert

*

Marc: Think we’re in the same restaurant. Time for a chat?

Pol: Oh jaja! Yeah sure. Who are you here with?

Marc: José Luis, Hector, Alex, etc. Usual guys :)

Pol: Are you mad? Don’t really know what else to do about it other than joke, sorry?

Marc: Nah best way I think! Thanks though, you really don’t have to say anything, we’re used to it

Pol: Well maybe I would love to watch you burn, but I like your wife to be :/

Marc: Jajaja! Ok the waiter says you’re upstairs in the corner, yeah?

Pol: Yup

“Hi.”

“Hi.” _Awkward._

*

bailadoramila: The day has finally arrived!! Work is now starting on the school!! :) pic.twitter.com/vgbhj

marcmarquez93: Do I get my fiancé back now? ;) RT @bailadoramila: The day has finally arrived!! Work is now starting on the school!! :) pic.twitter.com/vgbhj

bailadoramila: Yes @marcmarquez93 I’m all yours ;) x 

marcmarquez93: @bailadoramila wooo!! ;) x missing you! See you tomorrow, do not miss this flight! :P

bailadoramila: @marcmarquez93 pffff :P same you to jaja, see you soon xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx ;)

marcmarquez93: Joking aside, I’m a very proud man today. She has worked so so hard :) wish I could be there @bailadoramila.

bailadoramila: You’re always a little bit here @marcmarquez93. That's what this ring means x pic.twitter.com/kjsgws

*

**Thursday**

Marc: One thing I realised tonight lying alone in my bed:

Alex: Stop stop stop

Marc: Jajaja

Marc: No…if we’re getting married in Bali after Sepang, that means one thing and one thing only…

Alex: :/

Marc: Espargabros are going to have to be invited. Or at least Pol. [not sure if you can get them separately or if it’s a package deal]

Alex: Jajaja argghh I keep forgetting you’re getting married! Insane. But yeah haha bet you didn’t imagine that!

Marc: I didn’t. Also left my fucking dress shoes in Andorra. :/

Alex: Life is weird

Marc: So deep

Alex: Jaja :P

Alex: Can I ask you something?

Marc: Anything!

Alex: Are you really not jealous?

Marc: Of what?!

Alex: Pol. I guess that answers the question!

Marc: Oh jaja, not at all. It’s really good to see her laughing and having fun with someone else other than me and Lara

Marc: And maybe he’s not so bad. ;)

Alex: Jaja. He’s alright I guess, but…

Marc: Aleix is better, yeah I know jaja :)

Alex: :) I miss Lara.

Marc: Know the feeling. She’ll be here soon :)

Alex: She will. So will Mila :)

Marc: She will. Night 

Alex: Night.

*

 _Well, I guess it’s not just me then._ “Hey.”

“Oh. Hi.”

“Can’t sleep?”

“Nope.”

“Me neither.”

“I gathered. Jet lag?”

“Nope.”

“Me neither.”

“Mila.”

“Yup. Lara?”

“Yup. Well, that and your brother and figuring out how we’re going to share a garage.”

“Hmm. Have you, er…have you spoken to her?”

“You mean Lara? Or did Alex have an interesting time on the layover in Bangkok?”

That cracks the tension slightly, Marc giggling at the image of his brother dolled up and, in his head at least, singing cross-dressing karaoke, before the younger of the two sighs to himself and shrugs. “Lara.”

“Sometimes. Not much. She checks if I’m ok.”

“And you-“

“I reply when she wants me to.”

 _When she wants me to?_ “Are there times she doesn’t want you to?”

“I don’t know. Sometimes?”

 _I’m prying._ “Look I’m really sorry-“

“It’s ok.”

“But just let me-“

“Marc? It’s ok.” The defending Moto2 champion smiles at him, clapping him on the shoulder slightly, before they both turn back to look at the view, Tito’s eyes scanning over the horizon. “I understand.”

“Ok.” _So do I, so do I._ He takes a deep breath, not really having intended to talk about this but ending up here somehow, before looking back at his friend and nodding, slowly. “So do I.”

“I know.”

“I talked to Pol earlier.”

“Right…”

“Would you trust his opinion?”

“Depends what it was about. He’s kind of spoilt and hot headed but he’s a good person, mostly.”

 _I missed you._ “Ok. That’s what I think too. Honestly though I’m not sure I have much choice since Lara has been away and busy and I just doubt myself wondering if I’m being paranoid-“

“Paranoid? About Pol? Because-“

“No, not about him. It’s weird but it’s fine. About Mila. She’s…I don’t know. Maybe I’m not talking to the best person when my complaint is ‘she’s working too hard’…” He smiles back at the older rider, Tito smiling to himself and shrugging slightly in admittance of having also pushed too hard sometimes, before looking back at the distance and nodding. “I think she’s had about 4 hours sleep a night. Which is survivable and fine, if you’re not an athlete with another full time job, or almost. But she is, and I’m worried.”

“So you asked Pol?”

“I wondered if it was just because I remember the person from before and I’m being paranoid and impatient and it’ll all go back to normal soon.”

 _You remember. It was hardly a long time ago._ “What did he say?”

“He said the same thing.”

“Right.”

“What do you think?”

“I don’t know.”

“You do.”

“I think there’s something she’s not telling you.”

“Because-“

“Because she’s aware you got on a plane to come to Japan to try and win a title and thinks she’s doing a better job of lying.”

“Ok.” _3 of the most different personalities ever all agree._ “Same.”

“Any idea?”

“Nope.”

*

Alex: Night, I miss you. x x 

Lara: Afternoon. ;) miss you too. Speak soon, we’ll get the time difference sorted. Xxx

Alex: Please. X x

*

_Marquez crashes in Friday practice, race participation in doubt_


	43. Motegi: Part 2

_Why are you here._ She looks at him, holds his gaze for a second, and then realizes that no, there is no Marc running round the corner and shouting surprise. _Why are you here._

“Hello..?”

“Hi.”

She feels everything go cold, expression still not changing on his face and panic setting in. “Where’s Marc?”

“I thought it would be best coming from me-“

“Emilio, _where is Marc_.”

“Hospital. But he’s ok or will be, they’re checking him over.”

That sucks the breath out of her completely, world starting to pitch and the manager’s arms coming out to steady her, before she manages to pull in some breaths and clear her throat. “What happened and when.”

“FP2, big highside. All the first checks were fine.”

_But. What is the but._ “But.”

“But he got the double vision back. Like 2011-“

At that she bursts into tears, feeling everything that the long relaxing flight and many hours of sleep had rebuilt start to crumble, before letting him lead her to the waiting car and into the back seat, destination obvious.

“It’s already a lot better, fading quickly. He’s there to be checked, I promise, you know _I_ wouldn’t have left him if-“

“Roser-“

“She knows.”

“Alex and Julia are there-“

“Everyone’s there.”

“He’s awake and everything and he talked and-“

“Hey, listen to me.” He takes her hand, squeezing and biting his lip at the complete panic on her face, trying to keep his voice as quietly, reassuringly authoritative as possible. “It’s a worry because last time it took a long time to sort out, but that’s just making everyone paranoid. He is fine, he was awake and alert and talking and fine, he’s just there as a precaution to double, double-check that it’s going to keep fading and go. Very, very soon. Maybe even already.”

“Hmm.” Her phone starts going, catching up with the messages not delivered during the flight, and that at least gives her something to focus on for a few seconds, knuckles white as her other hand grabs onto Emilio’s, manager wincing to himself but with no intention of letting go. 

Alex: Don’t panic, we’re all here and Emilio is coming to get you

Alex: Hope that was a good decision, we didn’t know who would be best but Marc sent you a sleepy smile and he’s not in any danger

Alex: Call me when you land/let me know you got these x

Tito: If you need anything I’m here, room 519. 

Pol: Don’t know how much you know but I heard he isn’t in danger. I’m here if you need anything, call or text or just bang on my door. Room 672. x 

“Are you lying?”

“Lying.”

“Don’t play it down-“

“I’m not, I _promise._ ”

“Ok. How long-“

“20 minutes.”

“Ok.” _Calm. Deep breaths. Calm._

Mila: Pointless text but I have to tell you. I’m on my way ♥ don’t you dare not be ok.

Marc: He is asleep, and he knows. Don’t worry. [This is Julia]

Mila: Oh hi, sorry I didn’t think about that. Was it bad?

Marc: The crash was horrible, the consequences seem like they’re going away quickly. Don’t panic, really, he’ll be fine I’m sure.

Mila: I’m trying, will it be better when I see him or worse?

Marc: He looks pretty ok, really. Just a bit bruised.

*

_I hope you’ve not been talking to me because I haven’t been listening._ She realizes that guiltily as she gets out the car almost before it’s stopped, Emilio having to up the pace significantly to keep up as she heads for the door, photographers descending on them almost immediately. He’s glad she’s seemed in a calmer, focused bubble for the past ten minutes, and glad there’s no reaction to what they’re saying. Not so glad when one of them obviously pushes a bit far, European-accented-English saying something about Pol, and Mila stops, turns to him, and glares. _Oh no._

“Does this make you feel good about yourself?”

He watches the guy falter, having intended to make her slow and get a picture and not ready for a face-to-face conversation, and grits his teeth.

“No answer? Ok. I guess I expected it, coward.” She carries on again, murmuring starting up behind her, before slamming through the door, accompanied by a loud _you can all fuck off._

_Well I don’t disagree, but…_ “Left, end of the corridor, right.” 

“Thanks. Sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry.”

“Is he asleep?”

“Yes.”

“Artificially or just asleep.”

“Just asleep.”

“Ok. Bet you had the best job ever before I came along.”

“There are advantages to you being here.”

“I must have missed them.”

“Yeah you must. Because there’s a lot of them. You want my honest opinion, past all this tabloid shit?”

“Yeah.”

“You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to him. And don’t, _don’t_ fucking forget it.” He holds the door to the room for her, able to beat her slightly to it as she pauses just outside, and watches her lip wobble, composure threatening to leave and him very glad he’s said it; that proof enough how needed it was. _You usually look fairly bulletproof but I’m guessing from tonight that that’s only true in front of all of us._ He watches her walk up to the bed, him behind the closed door now and looking through the little window, before watching her bite the back of her hand and hearing the low, escaped sob echo back to him. That wakes Marc up, his rider frowning and blinking until he realizes who it is and they seem to pause in suspended animation for a second staring at each other before she loses it and he struggles up slightly, making space in the bed and Mila taking it quickly, curving around him and both careful of him and their surroundings. _See._ He watched a bit longer, Marc talking into her hair and eventually both sharing a low laugh and tears disappearing, before being able to put his finger on it. _He absolutely panicked._ He’d hidden it well, he really had. Every other person that had come into contact with him between gravel trap and hospital had been a normal amount of concerned, but bought every single smile and laugh and ‘no, I’ll be fine.’ Except Emilio, and Julia, and maybe Alex, not one person had really understood the underlying emotion and everything included in it. Nights in Cervera wondering if ‘next season’ had turned into ‘never’. That’s not to say Marc had been honest to them about it, although he’d known they saw through him. _And now here she is, and if I’m not very much mistaken you’re about to start explaining it second by second._ He understood the relationship on a physical level completely because in a photo together they looked like they’d been painted and entitled ‘perfect match’. On an emotional level he understood exactly what Marc was to her, because he’d seen and heard and heard about enough to grasp that. She’d been through bad things during which he’d held her up and resolutely marched forward and not dropped her once. He said the right things and he read her right every time. He made her laugh and stopped her crying. _And maybe it’s the same in reverse._

The mess from the car was now gone, in its place a calm woman in complete control of herself, holding his hand and completely in tune with him, coaxing out the details. 

_Definitely._

*

Mila: [to Alex, Emilio, Julia, Roser, Tito and Pol] He woke up when I got here, now asleep again. Slightly blurry but nothing so bad, and we talked through it all and he’s a lot calmer.

Emilio: Good, call me if you need me

Mila: Thank you so much for being there and I’m sorry I was a bitch.

Emilio: You really weren’t, and every time you need me I’m here. Are you staying?

Mila: Couldn’t untangle myself if I tried! :) thank you x

Emilio: You’re very welcome. Look after him, I’ll be back in the morning. Ok?

Mila: More than ok, see you then.

*

Alex: Ok good. You’re staying?

Mila: Yeah I am, I’m sure we’ll be back at the track tomorrow x

Alex: Ok. Night, look after him. X

*

Julia: I’m very glad to hear that. How are you?

Mila: I’m ok now thank you, sorry I was panicking

Julia: Don’t be sorry. Sleep well, see you tomorrow _hija_. Look after him for us x

*

Roser: Thank you for letting me know, _corazón_. If you need anything let me know, and keep him cuddled! He may complain but he likes it jaja

Mila: Jaja aww I will :) I know, so true! How is our princess?

Roser: She is a little nightmare! It’s like having Marc as a baby all over again but she is less messy :) and I love her almost as much!

Mila: Awww! I’m so glad you like her

Roser: Yes I’m very glad she is here, and very glad you are. 

Mila: It was terrifying.

Roser: I know sweetheart. You can more than handle it x

Mila: I’ll do my best x

Roser: I don’t doubt it for a second x

*

Tito: Ok, good news then. You alright? I’ve told Lara.

Mila: Oh thanks! Yes good news, and I’m ok now I think. :) thanks x

Tito: No problem. X

*

Mila: Are you around?

Mila: Sorry you’re probably asleep

Pol: Not asleep, yes I am. Ok?

Mila: Bit shaky. Don’t know how you have crashes and go straight back out. Don’t know how you guys do anything!

Pol: Not sure about everyone else but for me it’s the only way to get over it. And it helps having someone there who calms you down and talks to you

Mila: Aleix?

Pol: Yeah, and Carlota until that didn’t work anymore

Mila: aww I’m sorry. 

Pol: That’s ok, it wasn’t meant to be. Too different now.

Mila: I understand that. Not with Marc obviously. This is a bad time to ask but we’re just friends to you, aren’t we?

Pol: Yes don’t worry. You are very beautiful and very much in love with the enemy. And I like your personality much more than your ass…

Pol: Prroommiiiseeee ;)

Mila: Jaja aww just needed to check because I think I’m going to need some Pol time this weekend x

Pol: I’m here whenever :) do you have all your luggage with you?!

Mila: Thanks. No Emilio dealt with it, he picked me up.

Pol: Ah ok, I was wondering. I thought me coming would be a bad idea.

Mila: Yeah probably ;) because if we were having an affair obviously we would do it in plain sight and hold hands in the airport on the way to the HOSPITAL

Pol: I know, it’s so stupid. I’m quite flattered though ;)

Mila: Jaja :P same! ;) 

Pol: Jaja. Well thanks ;) you alright? Want to voice talk or would that wake him up?

Mila: He's asleep on me. And I should go soon but very appreciated. x

Pol: Ok. Are you alright?

Pol: Mila???

Pol: I'll keep asking...

Mila: Getting better, sorry. Not sure what to say

Pol: Good, and I can imagine. Night, when he wakes up you'll rule the world again, you'll see

Mila: Night. Thank you. And same to you. 

Pol: Screenshot. :P I have a t shirt for you!

Mila: Jajaja that would be tabloid gold ;) night night x


	44. #NeverGiveUp

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote it last night and fell asleep before I could post. I seem to have truly terrible timing when it comes to fic chapters and things that then happen in real life.
> 
> I would not update today for obvious reasons but that's not what Jules was about; black and mourning and gestures that you're 'supposed' to make. So I will post it and I hope you enjoy it/it proves a nice distraction, because we're here to live and we're here to live _a tope_ , and maybe fanfic is a funny little aside note to what we all do everyday, but it's written and read, in my opinion at least, for largely fantastic reasons and to share the love a little. I wish it was the next chapter really because I have that planned and it would do a better job of that, but here is the first one, anyway.
> 
> ♥ 
> 
> Thanks for reading, always. I hope what I'm getting at through that waffling makes sense.

_“Morning. Is it ok if I call you now? Even when we’re a long away from huskies?”_

“Jaja, of course it is. What’s up?”

_“Thought that would be obvious. How is he? How are you?”_

_Aww God you’re actually my friend._ “Um…” _Stop. Wobbling._ She takes a deep breath, lip just about playing along, before closing her eyes for a second to focus. “He’s ok.”

_“Ok as in soon on the way to qualifying?”_

“Don’t know yet. Maybe? Depends what happens when he wakes up.”

_“Oh sorry I didn’t-“_

“No I’ve been awake since 5. I’m in the cafeteria drinking coffee and very glad you called.”

_“Oh. Ok. And you? Is cafeteria and coffee the extent of it?”_

“Um…kind of?”

_“Talk to me, bailadora.”_

“Pol, don’t-”

_“You know we’re worried. Everyone’s a little worried. And when you don’t tell people, it just makes them worry more.”_

“God I thought Marc had energy in the morning…” _Oh cringe-_

_“Jajajajaja well…er…I think that came out wrong but YES, I do. And you’re on speaker now to share my breakfast so tell me. We’re alone.”_

“Pol…”

_“That’s me.”_

_He’s not going to give up._ That thought, and the sudden memory of his tattoo and his hashtag and his everything, makes her smile again, tears springing back a bit but more from being slightly overwhelmed. “You don’t give up do you…”

_“Never.”_

“I don’t think now is the right time thought-“

_“Mila, he called me. And he came and found me, here, when we were having dinner. Everybody is worried, and he won’t be at 100% until he knows. Like you won’t be until he wakes up and you see everything’s fine.”_

_Well then I guess-_ “Antoni is suing me.”

*

Alex: Morning. News?

Mila: News is I’m on my way back to the room and he’s hopefully not awake yet. X

Alex: Ok, let me know. Sorry I’m not there :/

Mila: I will, and don’t be. He would kick your ass for missing anything x

Alex: I know, that’s why ;) x hope you’re ok x

*

Tito: Tell him to get his ass back to work ;) x

Mila: I will ♥

*

Lara: My phone has been on loud and will be until you call. Love you, don’t worry. X

Mila: Trying, and appreciated. Always. Get back to work ;) x

Lara: Jaja it’s all starting to look good! ♥

*

Lara: News?

Alex: Not much yet.

Lara: Ok. Be careful baby, I miss you. x

Alex: I will, always. And you too x

*

Lara: Careful x

Tito: Always x

*

Emilio: Julia and Hector are on their way. Just get Hector to update me and make sure you look after yourself and him. Call if you need anything, I have my phone and will answer/return call when not on the pit wall. 

Mila: Thank you, will do. He’s not awake yet.

Emilio: Good. He needed some sleep. If you doubt that he’s 100%, you will tell me

Mila: I will seriously fucking tell you

“I like this girl.”

*

_“What?!”_

“Yeah.” _I said it, I said it out loud._ “And I went and did the _stupidest_ fucking thing I’ve EVER done…”

_“What the fuck is he suing you for?!”_

“God, make a fucking list.”

_“Oh Mila I’m so sorry-“_

“Don’t. Not now-“

_“Ok sorry, sorry. You did something about it?”_

“I saw people. Our case looks better than his. More bad PR. Risk. Stress.”

_“You said you did something stupid-“_

“I did something really stupid.”

_“Just spit it out.”_

“Well word of advice: when you fall out of love with someone who could sue you for it, don’t jump into bed with one of the richest athletes in Catalunya.”

_“Oh.”_

“Oh. And if you do do that, and you move in with him and you want to spend the rest of your life with him and raise kids and _you go into business with him and use a lot of his money_ , don’t then be so fucking weak that you bring the wedding forward by YEARS so that you’re worth EVEN MORE to the bastard.”

_“Weak..?”_

“Yeah apparently that’s what I do now. Something goes wrong, I call Marc. Something feels bad, I call Marc. Something threatens my happiness, I threaten Marc’s.”

_“Don’t be fucking ridiculous-“_

“I’m not being ridiculous, this is what’s happened-“

_“Ok, listen to me. That’s how this works. That’s how it’s MEANT to work. Maybe not the threatening his happiness because that’s bullshit, but you’re meant to be like that. He’s like that for you, isn’t he?”_

“I don’t know-“

_“Yes you do. You completely do. So it’s not YOU or anything like that, it’s because you love him and he loves you and that means that when something isn’t perfect, you support each other. Ok?”_

“It’s meant to be a two way street though-“

_“Did you come to Japan for the hospital coffee or-“_

“That’s not the same.”

_“It’s exactly the same. If there was no racing, where would you be?”_

“I don’t even know-“

_“You’d be on a building site in Catalunya overseeing YOUR dream. But you’re not, you’re here and looking after his.”_

*

_Japan. Crash. Blurry…_ He lets the thoughts gradually catch up with his consciousness, now aware why he’s so instinctively afraid of opening his eyes, before realizing the other thing. _She’s here._ He remembers going to sleep now, and remembers her arriving. Remembers going through everything and calming down, remembers _I don’t know if I’ll ever relax enough to sleep_ changing gradually into him dozing and then managing it as her fingers combed through his hair. And she’s not in the bed anymore, but there’s a hand he’d know blindfolded laced through his. _Although I guess that’s proven._

“Open your eyes.”

_How did you know._

“Hey.”

“Hey.” A kiss gets pressed against his forehead. “It’s going to be one, clear picture. I _promise._ ”

_You have a reason._ The fact she’s promised – not something she’d take lightly, makes him take a deep breath before squeezing her hand and opening his eyes, blinking. “Morning.” It takes a few seconds of panic, waiting for her to come into focus, before the fuzziness of sleep fades into the clarity of a promise well made. _Thank God._

“Right?”

“Y-yeah.” He tests it looking round the room and then back at her, eyes starting to light up.

_That was a risky thing to say, no matter how many assurances…_ “Ok. Perfect. Is it perfect?”

“I think so. But I’m paranoid-“

“Ok, I can imagine. You feel ok otherwise?”

“Yeah. Bit bruised.”

“Ok. Dizzy or sick or anything?”

“No.” He pulls her into a good morning kiss, forehead to forehead for a few seconds, before nodding to himself and sitting up, properly, letting the nerves and terror dissipate and feeling the reality of everything sink in, some small talk making them both relax before he seems to realise the time and place this is happening in. “Ok…am I in Q2…”

_That’s my Marc._ “Yes.”

“Right.”

“You’ve won from the back before.”

_That’s the woman I’m going to marry._ “Well I guess that answers my next question…”

She smiles with him, nodding slightly, before putting on her best Roser voice and narrowing her eyes slightly. “If you even try to lie to me about feeling ok-“

“Never, ever, ever.” He shakes his head, lacing their fingers together again, before another deep breath. “Firstly, you would see through me in a heartbeat.”

“I would.”

“And shall I tell you a secret…?” He whispers that into her hair before leaning down onto her shoulder, wincing slightly at the twinge but everything already starting to focus on the weekend, and the title.

“Anything.”

“I would have wanted to go home, too.”

_I know._

*

bailadoramila: Thanks for the messages, we’re on our way back to the track and Marc has the all clear :)

bailadoramila: @PolEspargaro thank you for your help :)

PolEspargaro: @bailadoramila so welcome :) thank you for the tips on his weaknesses. 

bailadoramila: @PolEspargaro jajaja :P [#nevergiveup]

*

Mila: He’s ok. Really. 

Emilio: And they agree?

Mila: Yeah, they were ok with him being ok late last night. Final proof was waking up and seeing ok, which he did.

Mila: Very scary though

Emilio: I can’t imagine. For us too! see you soon

Mila: Ok. We’re in EG hospitality because it’s quiet

Emilio: Ok, Hector there?

Mila: Hector, Roser, me and Marc

Emilio: Where’s Alex?

Mila: With Julia I think

Emilio: Ok. Thanks Mila.

*

Mila: Ok I will tell him after the race. Because I think you’re right

Pol: Ok. If he asks before though, tell him. Because he will know you’re lying.

Mila: I know :/ just seems a lot before a potentially title-deciding race…

Pol: Yeah because the rest of the weekend was the perfect run up to it?! :P it is, but worse not knowing. More distracting on the bike too

Pol: I don’t know him very well but YOU > money

Pol: So if he’s going to stress, make it about the right thing, and the less important one

Mila: I’m so glad I found you

Pol: This is awkward… ;) :P

Mila: You ruined it. :P

Pol: I’m still offended that he’s not threatened. Might wear my shirt less, will that help?

Mila: Honestly feel free to do that ;) sorry Husky, he just knows I’m a one-man woman :P

Pol: Still…my abs… _Media content in this message_

Mila: Put those away and zip up :P be careful. And thank you x

Pol: Do you send other friends kisses?

Mila: Just you ;) x

Pol: Jaja ok I’ll stop now. Say something to him for me like ‘glad you’re ok’ or whatever in a good way that doesn’t sound weird or gay

Mila: He says thanks

Pol: Good. :) see you later maybe. Call anytime if you need me :)

Pol: And #NeverGiveUp ;D

Mila: Never. You really think he’d worry less if he knew?

Pol: When your fiancé is MARC and he asks ME what is wrong with YOU

Pol: YES I DO, GET YOUR HEAD OUT YOUR ASS AND TELL HIM AND WATCH HIM BE SO RELIEVED!!!! 

Pol: Ok really gotta go now, Herve is going to kill me x

Mila: You’re a saint

Pol: Screenshot

Mila: :P puff

Pol: Jajajaja 

Mila: Epic typo. Ciao ciao

Pol: Ciaoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo 

Pol: I’m not gay I’m just a food person :P

Pol: Jaja, GOOD PERSON :P

Mila: Screenshot

Pol: Fuck off, Marquez

Mila: Jaja yeah will be in…18 days!! :O

*

Pol: Talked to Mila and you don't need to panic I don't think. Try and talk to her soon? She's just not wanting to worry you and failing ;) :) 

Marc: Ok…is it bad?

Pol: Oh, no sorry I thought I would tell you now so you stop worrying

Marc: She’s ok?

Pol: She’s ok. No health problems, no affair, no baby…

Pol: Don’t know about you but THAT would make me panic 

Marc: Ok, thanks, really appreciate it. And jajaja yeah I can imagine :P

Pol: A baby wouldn’t make you panic?!

Marc: Um…not planning it yet or in any way prepared but nervous and terrified – yes. Panic – no.

Pol: Ok well…

Pol: [silence]

Marc: Jajajajaja :P I’m in love with Mila, and will be forever. So anything on the way, we’ll deal with :P

“Pol is asking me about babies and wondering why I didn’t panic. What happened in my life.” He grins at the phone, incredulous but funny enough to make him giggle to himself, before looking up to see three faces staring back at him, mouths open. 

“What?!”

“What?!”

Alex leaves first, in genuine panic, leaving their parents blushing nervously at him and each other, Julia wide-eyed and Roser the same but more amused and catching on.

“Ok when I said ‘didn’t panic’ I don’t mean she’s pregnant!” _Argghhhhh-_ “Ok read the messages-DAD! No, come back and read the ph-“

“BACK IN A MINUTE.”

“Mum I promise that’s not what…I mean…we…no…“ _We do that a lot but we also use THAT so-_

She looks at him, sighing to herself and rolling her eyes affectionately, before nodding and pointing at the bowl in front of him. “Eat your breakfast, Marc. Just eat your breakfast, and be quiet.”

He shares the slightly mischievous, knowing smile, blushing but content to be beaten and her face saying enough for him to not need to explain further, before almost choking on the cereal as she times it to perfection and ruffles his hair on her way out, Alex on track first.

“I give it 2 years before we repeat this conversation. Tops.”

*

_Dani Pedrosa took a home win for Honda in Motegi in a race that saw teammate Marquez fight up from 12th on the grid after missing qualifying due to a crash on Friday. The reigning World Champion was given the all clear to race but advised to sit Saturday out, which he did. The first two laps of the race can be watched from Marquez's on board camera, something highly recommended. The title fight will continue in Phillip Island._


	45. Let Go for Tonight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you ♥
> 
> Will get replying I hope before I fall asleep, I hope you like it!! Fluffy ish maybe?
> 
> Title- Foxes.

Marc: Congratulations! 

Dani: THANKS WHERE WERE YOU!!

Marc: Excuse me, I was battling Iannone! AGAIN! 

Dani: Tried to save you a spot on the podium :(

Marc: Jaja aww well are you out celebrating now?

Dani: Yes come and find us! Santi is here! He is doing karaoke! It’s like Eurovision! Cher with a beard!

“Jejeje that’s a lot of exclamation marks…”

“Dani gets excited when he wins. Well, no. Dani gets excited when he wins and then drinks.”

She laughed at that before spraying the last bit of hair where it was supposed to be and turning to pout at him. “Will I do?”

“Um…not sure how to say this but you’re the most beautiful woman in the WORLD.”

“Awww.” She leaned in for a kiss before squeezing his ass on the way back to upright and then messing with the front of his hair slightly, eyes trained on the task and not his. “Right well…shall we go? And join them?”

“We’re having dinner…” _And talking._

“We are. Then we could get sweaty and filthy and scream karaoke and generally just forget about everything for a while…” _I don’t use puppy dog eyes often but I’m so not above it._ “I know you’re a bit bruised but-“

“You want to go out.” _This hasn’t happened in a while._ “Really?”

“Yeah?!” _Is that now shocking?!_

“Then yeah, ok. IF and I mean IF-“

“Aww no please please-“

“You don’t even know what I’m going to say!”

“You’re going to say something about the fact that I already drank some wine and not wanting to carry me home or some bullshit…” She grinned at the amused _pfff_ from Marc before raising her eyebrows and grinning. “Right?”

“Well…”

“I’ll party with Pol if you won’t party with me.”

“That’s very cruel.”

“It is. Who would force a lady to party with Pol?!”

“Jeje. Ok, FINE.” _But after-_ “But after we talk, yeah?”

 _Why do you think I had wine._ “Yeah…”

It took less than a minute for them to sit down and order, both half starving by this point and now not above the choices they’d made – pasta, in Japan didn’t matter – and they got to the end of the main course and onto sharing a dessert – slightly wide eyed jealousy from Jack Miller across the room included – before Marc finally gave her ‘the face’.

“It’s like we’re old and married already.”

“What?”

“I know what that face means. It means I have to stop distracting you with sexy food and actually say stuff.”

“Yes, it does.” _I love you sober a lot but I also love you tipsy, and have the feeling tonight I may be loving you drunk._ “And we aren’t old but we are almost married.”

“Urgh, don’t remind me. Ball and chain.”

He grinned and raised his eyebrows. “You’re so fucking cheeky tonight-“

“Does it make you want to tie me up and punish me?”

 _YES._ “Mila…”

She leant across the table and lowered her voice to more of a whisper, grinning and Marc still with a mixture of exasperation and amusement on his face. “I think that’s what you might be screaming, yeah…”

 _We will be doing that._ “Sounds like a plan. Now though, just tell me.”

 _3, 2, 1…_ She sat back up and took another sip before a deep breath. _#LetsGetIt._ “Antoni is suing me.”

*

 _Oh for GOD’S SAKE._ He smiled at them across the room, Aleix raising his glass in Marc’s direction, before getting a bit more positive distraction as Santi put his arm round his shoulders and started yelling in his ear. _Espargaros everywhere._

“Marc!”

“Hi!”

“Where’s the beautiful woman?”

“Mila?”

“No, ALEX!”

He laughed at that, his crew chief already well on the way to finding that kind of joke the most incredibly intelligent thing in the world, before leaning back in to yell above the music. “She’s talking to Lara, be here in a minute!”

“Lara’s here?”

“Not yet! Thursday!”

“Oh, ok. Alex and Tito?”

“Tito wasn’t feeling great and I think Alex is in the hotel bar. On his way soon. Where’s Dani?”

“Don’t know.”

“He said he was here with you!”

“I’ve not seen him since the last song he did.”

“What did he do?”

“I can’t even remember. Ballad. He swayed a lot. THERE!” The older man pivoted them round, pointing off towards the bar and Marc starting to giggle at the tone of it. _Are we hunting for rare birds or Dani Pedrosa._ “Go and buy him a drink!”

 _Thanks yeah I was going to._ “Will do!” _You not so much._ He grinned and patted the swaying figure on the arm before heading off in the direction he’d been advised, Dani not visible but that sometimes a downside of being short. _Will it be better or worse than Brno…_

*

“POL!”

_“Hello!”_

“WHERE ARE YOU!”

_“Where are YOU?! I’m in a club with your fiancé and Dani. And other people.”_

“You’re here! I’m here! Outside!”

_“How much did you drink?!”_

“Not much! Kind of. You?”

_“Enough! Why are you outside?”_

“Calling a friend.”

_“But I’m INSIDE.”_

“Jajaja pff not you! Lara. But yeah I’m going to come and find-“

“Beat you to it.” The younger Espargaro grabbed her from behind and twirled her round, resultant scream earning them a few glances, before grinning as she pulled him into a hug.

“POL!”

 _Oh dear._ “Hiiii…”

“He still wants to marry me!”

 _Awwww._ “Of course he does?!” The Catalan rider pulled away slightly and motioned at her. “Look at you?”

“Aww THANK YOU.” She did a slightly unsteady twirl before grabbing onto him for a bit of support. “But no I told him like you said and you were right.”

 _Why were you worried._ “I’m always right.”

“That’s definitely not true?”

“Hmm…maybe not so much?”

“Jejeje. Right are we going to dance?”

“Shouldn’t you be dancing with Marc?”

“I’m sure I will be dancing with Marc soon enough. Come on, show me your moves.” She grabbed his hand, dragging him back inside and past a giggling Aleix and Laurinette, at both the state of her and Pol’s powerlessness, before leaning in to press her lipstick just-close-enough-to-not-smudge to his ear. “Just relax! Otherwise you’ll definitely be shit!”

 _Great, thanks._ “I’ve not had enough to drink for this!”

“Well that can be changed!” She wiggled her eyebrows, him realising the obvious mistake too late, before pulling him over to the bar and ordering 3 shots, two of which ended up in front of Pol. “Right, down those and we’ll free you…”

“Why do I get two?!”

“Because you’re bigger than me! And also because I had a bit more than you already…” She shook her head as he started to protest, eventually clapping and grinning as they disappeared, the Catalan rider blushing but on board with the plan, and then dragging him back into the people. “Right, now…relax…”

“That’s hard to do when a beautiful woman has her hands all over you.”

“What a bitch! Where is she?!” She pretended to turn round and look, Pol giggling at that and shots seeming a better idea by the second, before she pulled him in to more protest and started to get him to move. 

“He’s really not going to be jealous-“

“When we’ve danced a while, and it’s getting late and Marc comes over…then I will dance with him.”

“Sounds like you’re promising me a show…”

 _Jajaja._ “No, it’s just different.” She pulled him in again, both grinning and him now actually managing to move, “Ok? You know that?”

“Mila, not to be too pathetic when you’re manhandling me on a dancefloor in Japan…”

“But…”

“I think you’re really beautiful, but I’m really not interested in you as anything other than a friend. And I’m really glad we met.” He grinned and smiled as she spun around slightly, fun winning over style, and ended up back face to face with her. “I needed you.”

“Awwww baby I needed you too!”

“You know what I mean!”

“I think I do?”

It seemed to pause for a second, her hands holding his between them, before he kind of shrugged and some of the new confidence evaporated. “I’m heartbroken, babe. I’m heartbroken and you’re reminding me it was just her, not everyone.”

 _Awwww._ “Awww I’m so sorry.” She grabbed him into a hug, breathing him in for a while and feeling the nerves at how close they were disappear, before leaving a perfect lip-print on his cheek and laughing as he did, back to the moment and long ‘woooo!’ echoing upwards as the song changed.

*

“Congratulations!”

“Marc! Hi!” The older rider grinned at him, accepting the drink with a grin and taking a sip, eyes widening as it proved delicious. “What is this?!”

“I don’t know but the barman thought it was for Mila. ‘Nice drink for a nice lady.’” He watched Dani laugh at that, so much some of it spilt slightly, before he held it up to the light. “It’s pink but I thought this was the 21st century?!”

“Same!” Marc leant in to yell in his ear again, music loud. “It suits you!”

“I’m not threatened!”

“What songs did you sing so far?”

“Only power ballads, you didn’t miss much.” Dani grinned again, raising the glass at Raul as he came over, frowning slightly at the umbrella, before looking back at Marc and raising his eyebrows. “I thought next we could do some Sinatra.”

“Oh God I am NOT-“

“Jajajaja, I KNOW. Is Mila here?”

“Yeah! Think she’s dancing with Pol!”

“Aww, that’s nice.”

“Is it?”

“Well yeah isn’t it? He’s like her gay best friend.”

 _Oh, Dani._ “Jajaja so you don’t think I have to be jealous?”

“Do you feel jealous?”

“No.”

“Then you definitely don’t need to be! You going to show off some of the moves she MUST have taught you-“

“Jaja, maybe. MUCH later!” He spotted his brother come in over the other side of the room, a relatively easy feat given Alex’s height and the fact they were in a Japanese club full of MotoGP personel and locals, and nodded his way. “Right, enjoy the drink and well done. See you later.”

“Bye!” Dani swayed slightly, getting to the bottom of the drink and putting the empty glass back down, before grinning as Raul frowned at the remains of the sugar pink monstrosity and put another shot in front of his rider.

“What the fuck were you drinking?!”

“Nice drink for a nice lady!”

*

“Ok, ok, ok. Now I’m definitely DEFINITELY going outside to take a break.” He grinned at the pout and shook his head, headed off already, before grabbing on as her hand found his and she followed, ending up in fresh air staring at Marc and Aleix giggling, really, truly giggling, leaning on each other and almost wiping tears from their eyes.

“What happened to you?!”

“Santi th…tho…thought…” Cough. “Santi thought that g…that girl…there…” Marc pointed, collapsing in giggles again and held up by the older Espargaro, before wrapping his arms around Mila as she walked over, clinging on. “Santi thought that girl was ME. And you…you know how…how he gets when he’s DRUNK-“

“Oh GOD.” 

“I _KNOW._ ”

*

 _See, now it’s late, and it’s a bit quieter, and here we are._ Dani gone, or more taken, and everyone else starting to filter out slowly, the moment happened naturally. “Hey, you. Danced out?”

“Never.”

“Good.” He pulled her in, arms round her waist and hers going round his neck, before ending up forehead-to-forehead and swaying in time with the music, nothing said for a few minutes until he smiled as her fingers played with the hair at the nape of his hair. “You feeling a bit better now?”

“You mean since I told you?”

“Yeah, since you told me.” He tilted his head to connect their lips, chaste but a lot of feeling in it, before moving his fingers under the fabric of her top to find the small of her back and nodding, eyes still closed. “Can’t believe you’d spend even a second worrying about that, _amor._ ”

 _Me neither, now._ “Sorry.”

“Don’t have to be sorry. Just don’t worry about things. Tell me. I don’t think you’ve ever made me mad? Not, like…seriously mad…so I can’t see there will ever be anything-”

“You make me mad all the time.”

“You know what I mean-“

“Like bigger things than shrinking my clothes in the washing machine.”

“YES. And I already said-“

“Baby it wasn’t your mum, your mum cried with laughter when I showed her.”

“Pfff.” He smiled through the pout, eyes opening and pulling away enough to be able to focus on hers, before getting lost in the moment for a little while, music and alcohol swirling together to make it a few minutes seem like seconds, before the song changed and something clicked, everything fading into the background and neither aware of anything except each other, one of those kisses that looks as perfect from the outside as it feels from the inside, completely relaxed and communicating everything they wanted to. _I love you even more than that time when I couldn’t even sleep from thinking about you._

*

“God.”

“Eh?”

“Look at them.” Pol pointed, Ricky turning and kind of stopping half way round, fixated as they both were, before smiling slightly to himself and clapping the older man on the shoulder. “Have you ever seen anyone like that?”

“Like…”

“Like…that.” _Use your eyes, man._ “Like somehow it’s not too much…but they just…” He trailed off as they paused, forehead to forehead and smiling to themselves, before Mila leant in again, fingers tangling gently in his hair as his hands moved further up her back. “It’s like they’re actually magnets. I don’t even mean…” He narrowed his eyes at Ricky’s face and shook his head. “I don’t even mean like that…I just…”

“Ok come one, admit it you’re jealous-“

“I am really, really jealous, yeah!” The younger Espargaro nodded before taking the drink offered by the returning Aleix. “I want that, but not with her. Or Marc.” He grinned at the older riders before taking a big sip and letting his eyes wander back over to the girl who’d been noticing him noticing her noticing him for a while, and walking over, finally enough Dutch courage. _Hey, let’s get married._ “Hiii…”

*

It wasn't really something either of them said, more they both felt it at the same time and moved apart, heading for the door and for a taxi, silently sat in the back staring out at the lights flash past on the way back. Through the lobby, into the lift, until the door was closed and they were pressed against it, no rush and nothing ripped or scratched, just bit by bit making their way over to the bed and feeling the stress of the weekend dissipate as his hips started to move and her hair fell down between them, eyes locked together again and skin shivering. _Tonight was perfect. Well, a perfect antidote._ He groaned slightly again as she took more control and bit his bottom lip, before reading the look perfectly and capturing her mouth in a messy, needier kiss. _Or maybe it's just you._.


	46. XO

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title - Beyonce. #flawless ;)
> 
> Kind of a random chapter. I hope the good kind...
> 
> Thank you! Enjoy? ♥

“Hi.”

“Hi.” He falters a second, a bit strange suddenly seeing her _here_ in this reality, before wrapping her in a hug and both feeling the deep breath of relief as it felt just like it had back at ‘home’. “Missed you.”

“Missed you too.” She smiles to herself as he took her hand, walking out the airport and into the late evening sunshine of Melbourne, and follows him over to the car, Emilio there and waiting, that one of the key conditions of ‘I don’t care that it’s 2 hours away, I’m going to fetch her.’ “Alex?”

“Hmm?”

“Thanks for coming.”

*

“No, mum. No…it’s fine if you get there then. I promise. There’s really not much to organise…yes…no, no need. Just yourself. Whatever you want to wear. And you’ll be able to meet Julia and Roser…yeah…no? Why? Ok. Yeah sure, that’s fine…ok I will t…t….” She bites her lip to stop giggling at the incessant fingers delving under the oversize t shirt she’s wearing, Marc winking and grinning at her, before managing to make it to the end of the sentence. “I will talk to you soon. Ok? Love you. Bye bye…” She drops the phone back on the bed and sighs overdramatically before turning over to look at him properly and shaking her head in mock disgust. “Marquez, I was trying to talk to my mother.”

“Oh sorry didn’t realise…”

“Was there something you wanted?” She takes his hand, guiding it under the fabric and eyes locked together as they trace her stomach, then over her hip and lower, his eyes seeming to get darker and darker until they’re almost black, completely captivated. “I guess we’d better go to sleep…”

“Yeah.” He nods, taking the initiative now and moving his hand back around her hip to let his fingertips dig in and pull her in, before pulling her bottom lip between his teeth and suddenly finding himself pinned to the bed. “Sleep…”

“Sleep.” She grinds down, flipping her hair for good measure and then leaning down so they’re eye to eye separated by inches, and lets her eyes wander over his face. “We should definitely…or…”

“Or…”

“Or..?”

“Wait here.” She pushes herself off him, off the bed and walking away with just enough swagger to hear the low noise in response, headed for the suitcase on the floor, before pulling out one of the honeymoon outfits, mouth in a little ‘o’ and eyes wides as she looks back at him. “What’s this?!”

“Oh God…”

“No idea where this came from…”

“Was that meant to be-“

“No, I have _plenty_ for the wedding night. _Don’t worry._ ”

 _I’m so far from worried._ “Ok…”

“Shall I put it on?”

He nods.

“Ok.” She raises an eyebrow, loving how fixated he is on every little movement, before slowly pulling the t shirt up and off, letting it drop to the floor and looking down at it before she looks back at him, Marc licking his lips as she puts one foot in, then the other, and pulls it up, hands on hips and tiny shrug before she walks over and grabs the front of his shirt, depositing him in a chair and turning some music on before ending up in front of him, looking down. “Good evening, Sir. Lap dance?”

*

 _Why am I so nervous._ “You want food? Or you want to-“

“No, I ate on the plane. Thanks.” _What happened._ “Um, hotel would be better. Sleep? I didn’t get much. _Wondering how this would be._

“Ok.” He takes her hand again, heading through the lobby trailing her case and pressing the button in the lift, before they walk down to the door in silence and he opens it for her, silence shut in with them again once it closes and they’re staring at each other. _So…_ “Sleep, or-“ He loses the rest of the sentence into a kiss as she throws her arms round his neck, insistent and waiting for the response that comes quickly, ending up with her pressed against the wall and clothes slowly getting attacked and removed, until she shoves her hand into his jeans and he buries his face in the crook of her neck, just enough consciousness to manage to suck a bruise there, noise making him shiver. _Missed you._ He shivers again as her fingers scratch down his back, enough to tingle with pain but not too much, before that seems to unlock the nerves and he boosts her up and smiles into the kiss as she wraps her legs around his waist and they end up crashing onto the bed. 

_God, Alex…_

_Please say the right name-_

*

The shirt was the first to go, Marc under strict instructions to leave his hands holding onto the back of the chair and not touch, and now it’s almost maddening feeling her tease and not being allowed to touch, arousal painful in his boxers and the amount of contact never enough, lip bitten with the effort in doing as he’s told. “Please…”

She smiles to herself, grinding down more than before and facing away from him, before taking one of his hands and tracing down her ribs and over her hip, letting him leave it there before moving the other to the same place and feeling his fingertips dig in as he realises he’s allowed. She moves again, the groan making the hair on the back of her neck stand up, before reaching up to unclasp the bra fastening and shrugging out of it quickly, detaching the top and letting it fall to the floor before moving his hands up to her breasts and leaning back against him, exposing her neck and her turn to moan as his mouth latches on. 

*

She laces their fingers together, having found a rhythm somewhere between teasing and satisfying and no rush, rolling her hips again and watching his face as he pushes his head back into the pillow, eyes closed and bead of sweat on his forehead, until his eyes open and lock on hers, spark of something in there that they’d both felt the absence of in the airport, and she leans down into another, messier kiss as one hands frees itself from hers and runs down her back, squeezing her ass and guiding the pace throw another few slow thrusts until they lose that control and he wraps his arms around her, pulling her in and wrapping his legs round hers, hips the only thing moving and the little _ah_ every time he moves not helping his self-restraint. He knows he’s not going to last much longer, wrestling them the other way up and slowing down again, fingers ghosting down her front and teasing until they join the rhythm and the noise she was making changes into something lower, fingernails digging in.

*

He shakes his head slightly, battle for supremacy raging on their way to the bed and just about hard again, before managing to pin her down and kissing a raw line down her front, pausing to connect her hips with a messy string of kisses before teasing with his tongue, circling and then pushing inside and tasting her, some of his hair definitely pulled out, pausing once her breath gets too quick and drawing patterns over the skin with his tongue until she almost forcibly pulls him back up and in towards her, burying himself in one thrust and pausing face to face until they’ve got their breath back, eyes opening for a split second before he starts to move, slow and deep and feeling a sting of pain as her fingernails scratch deep, red lines down his back. He nips her lip, fingers finding her clit again and rubbing roughly in time with the thrusts, until she arches her back and groans, fingernails scrabbling and muscles clenching around him as she comes and tries to take him with her, hair plastered to her head and unresponsive in the kiss for a few seconds until his hips move again, more restraint than during the lap dance, and his mouth nips her neck, message received and fingers starting to tease again, determined the final orgasm of the night [probably] is going to be shared and all the better for it. 

*

“Night…” _We’ve not even said much else._ She grins at that realisation as he seems to realise the same thing, words out loud sounding a bit weird, before leaning back to turn the light off and snuggling into him. _Bliss. Before tomorrow we go to the paddock and he’s there and I don’t even know if you’re friends or close to it or if something else-_

“Night.”

*

“Oohhh my _God._ ”

He lets his head lol to the side to look at her, both now sticky and messy and more than enough lipstick on both for an argument for ‘drag act’ to have a chance of success, before grinning and nodding, lying flat on his back and dropping a kiss into her hair as she curls around him.

“I think I have friction burns.”

He laughs at that, a little bit at first and then giggling more and more as she joins in; the way she’d said it so completely genuinely annoyed, before he lazily grabs the sheet, wrapping them up in it and finding her left hand. “Less than two weeks.” He runs his finger over the ring, still amazed she’d even said yes sometimes, before looking back at her and raising his eyebrows. “Reg-“

“Cruel.”

“Hmm?”

“Really cruel to ask a woman about regrets when you just did… _that_ …”

“Knew you only loved me for my skills.”

“Cough.”

“What?”

“Not all of those skills are self-taught, Marquez.”

“Pff.” _So true._ “Night.” He leans in, kiss brief but gentle, before snuggling into her. “So true.” He smiles into her shoulder at the low laugh before pressing another few kisses against the skin, punctuating the words. “You know when we’re old…”

“We’ll never be old.”

“You know when our ages are a large number…”

“Yeah…”

“I hope you look back and smile that you chose me.”

 _Awww._ “Marc?”

 _Aha._ “Yeah?”

“When I think about you in any way at all, all I do is smile. Turn off the light, baby. Let’s go to sleep.” _And it doesn't feel-_ "And it doesn't feel like _you_ chose _me_."


	47. Qué Hiciste

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title is from the JLo song.
> 
> Thank you so much for reading and I hope you enjoy it! :/ ;)
> 
> ♥

“God he looks so cute all wrapped up.”

“Hmm?”

Mila smiles, pointing at Marc on the screen, and then laughs at her friend’s face as she realises the image has changed to Jorge Lorenzo, in a scarf. “Ok well Jorge looks pretty cute too, but-“

“I feel like that’s something I shouldn’t admit-“

“Jeje well I am secure enough-“

“Hey! That’s _not_ -“

_Oops._ “Nah I didn’t mean that. Ooh also…” She points at the screen again, now Dani on there equally swaddled against the cold, and they both grin to each other and nod.

“Yeah ok _that_ is cuteness I can admit.”

“Jeje. God, after Dani won in Motegi we all went out, well they went out and the Espargaros were there and we went out to join them after talking about everything, to let off some steam…and Santi was crazy but _Dani_ when he relaxes, seriously I found it so hard to not just hug him. In fact I think later I did just hug him and babble at him…”

“Awwwwwwwww.”

“ _I know._ ”

“Jejeje.” They laugh slightly, guiltily, before it moves into full on giggles and Lara wraps her arms round her, giving her a squeeze and whacking a kiss in her hair. “God Mila I’m so fucking happy for you.”

“Hmm?”

“You were a fan of Marc for a while I know-“

“You remember Cheste 2012-“

“YES I remember Cheste 2012! But it’s just crazy how everything happened.”

“Crazy. Maybe stupid.”

“Maybe a bit stupid.” She smiles and bumps shoulders with her. “But in the best way. And now you’re going to _marry_ him.”

“I know.” _Do I know, has that actually sunk in?_

“Is he what you thought?”

“Marc?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, not really? I mean he’s hot. Obviously. Talented. Determined. In a good mood a lot. But…I don’t know…”

“I think you do. And I think you’re going to have to write it down for vows-“

“Ok maybe I do because I already started. A speech, anyway.” She smiles and goes a bit red, before getting out her phone and opening the note, passing it over for Lara to read and trying to ignore the burning cheeks. _I overshare too much._ And then a smile. _Yes, don’t let your best friend read your public speech, ffs._

*

_Marc. I think, and I hope, that everyone here today knows well everything I’m going to say. But I’m still going to say it, so you can hear it, and I can try and put it into words and understand it better for myself._

_When I met you, I was pretty overexcited. Marc Marquez walking into a pole dancing club and looking at me like that. And before anyone goes too red, I just mean he looked so interested, somehow. In me. In my face more than anything else. And I went home buzzing after that, and somehow it felt important. A few minutes when we didn’t even say anything and it felt important. And then you came to the tango show, and we did talk. Properly. And I don’t think you noticed but I was so nervous I could hardly stand up. But then maybe you were too and we were both just pretending to be super cool. Like normal…*pause for a little laugh*. And then it just happened, and I think both of us knew when we went back to our ‘other lives’ that something had happened, more than just a one night stand with a celebrity. Well, for me at least! And you started your stalking campaign under false pretences…and honestly, on paper that was soooo bad! I still can’t believe I let you get away with that! And I can’t believe – in a better way – that you let me in and trusted me with who you were. And then Andorra, and that feeling I got driving away like I was 18 and leaving home for the first time. Always talking to you, sometimes for a whole day and then a bit longer. And I don’t know if you got this but I just felt like it was suddenly a question of when and how. I didn’t care, then, what anyone thought or what it looked like, I just knew, completely knew, that it had to happen. I don’t think I’m going to go through the rest of it but one thing I’ll always remember is New York and I think everything sunk in and suddenly seemed real. When you arrived, perfect timing, and I just felt like I could beat anything. If I'd been alone then, I think I would have just faded away. slow It’s taken a while because that weekend, and everything after, hurt me so much. But I wouldn’t be half the person I was before if it wasn’t for you. And I think now I’m more than who I was before because you’ve taught me so, so much, and healed so, so much. I love you and I have since that night your crew chief dragged you somewhere you should never have been. Because the Marc that does laps faster than most other people in the world, and the Marc who grins his way through events and press conferences…the Marc that everyone knows, that Marc is an incredible but sometimes 2 dimensional person. And the person behind it, the full 3D version, is the love of my life. You’re so supportive, and kind, and you make me laugh like nobody in the world. Never, ever boring. You sense everything that sometimes I’m still a little bit too timid to say, and you remind me that I can tell you anything in the world and we’ll deal with it together. Every day when I wake up and see you, I’m still a bit overwhelmed. You’re beautiful, but you’re so much more than that and I can’t imagine living without you…*TBC* ending in me probably crying._

“I think I need to break up with Alex.”

*

“Calm. Deep breaths. He’s ok.”

“I know.” She takes in a big gulp of air, nodding to herself and obviously trying to convince herself, before snapping back to reality slightly.

“Lara? Look at me. Right. _He is ok._ ” 

“I need to go to Clinica Mob-“

“We’ll go now. But he’s ok.”

She nods, accepting the squeeze on the shoulder, before looking back at the screen as they exit the VDS garage, checking the other one is still on his race run, lap after lap after lap, wondering if karma was as cruel as it seemed sometimes. _You be careful too._

*

Mila: We’re in CM, I’ll meet you in hospitality.

Marc: Ok? He’s ok isn’t he?!

Mila: He’s fine. Lara panicked, sorry should have explained x x

Marc: Oh :/ ok. What’s the damage?

Mila: Bruised and some skin on his left hand got patched up a bit, but he’s completely fine.

Marc: Ok. X x

Mila: Is Tito ok?

Marc: Yeah?!

Mila: No I didn’t see anything I just mean he’s still going round?

Marc: Still going, 0.089 off Zarco at the top, lap 13 of the run

Marc: Did she ask that?

Mila: No. I think because she doesn’t want to.

Marc: But she obviously cares a lot about Alex…

Mila: She does and she always will. Is that you how feel about me?

Marc: Ok I understand, see you in a bit. X

“I think Lara is going to break up with Alex.”

*

“Hey.” She walks in, him looking almost lit up in the room, sun now out but mostly kept out by the blinds, and stands at the side of the bed. _Deep breaths. He’s there, and he’s fine, and these things happen._ “You’re ok.”

_You came._ “I am. You didn’t need to-“

“I know. I was worried.”

“I’m fine.” He takes her hand in his right hand, squeezing and running his thumb over the back, before looking back at her again. _You came._ “Sorry if it scared you.”

“I know the risks.”

“Yeah but-“

“No, no but.” She gets on the bed, gently, and they both stare at the ceiling for a while before turning to look at each other. “I know the risks, I’m just glad you’re ok.” They let that sink in for a while, waiting for the last test results, before his voice sounds rusty in the room.

“Lara?”

“Hmm?”

“That was a bit scary.”

_I know, baby._ “He’s under investigation. Corsi.”

“Ok.”

“Ok?”

“Well it doesn’t change anything.”

“It doesn’t. But that doesn’t mean it he doesn’t deserve it.”

"Sometimes deserving it doesn't matter much though, does it."

_No, it doesn't._ She bites her lip, that sending far too many things firing round her brain, before nuzzling into him and feeling that familiar, calming 'Alex is here' spread through her. _I'm going to miss that. I mean...maybe. If I...If I what? And would it even stick around if I did because-_ "No, it doesn't."

*

Tito: Is he ok? My side of the team don’t have many details.

Lara: He’s fine. Bruised and left hand a bit bandaged. Are you ok?

Tito: Ok good. :) I’m good, felt great today. P1, Zarco +0.062. How are you?

Lara: A bit shaken. I hate watching you crash.

Tito: Me too, and I understand. You still want to talk to me later?

Lara: Maybe tomorrow, I think I need to stay with Alex. Sorry x

_Oh great fucking wording._

Tito: No problem. Can I ask what it’s about?

Lara: If I could say it in a text I would. X be careful, please. 

Tito: Always. And ok, whenever you want. You’re coming to Malaysia?

Lara: Yeah I am, I’m here the whole time until they go for their mini honeymoon

Tito: I guess you’re chief bridesmaid?

Lara: I am :) 

Tito: Ok :) will see you later, or tomorrow. X

*

Mila: Marc’s looking for Alex, are you with him?

Lara: Yeah, he said sorry he just checked his phone. We’re in the hotel room watching a movie and having room service.

Mila: Ah ok. Us too :) see you tomorrow…I guess you didn’t talk to him yet?

Lara: No I will talk to him tomorrow, tonight is Alex time.

Mila: I meant Alex…

Lara: Ok well…I’m going to talk to Tito, too. I think I should let him know what’s happening especially if Alex is going to maybe think something IS happening

Mila: But nothing is happening…

Lara: I’ve only spoken to him in a few texts for a while, so no. 

Mila: Sorry x 

Lara: Not everyone cheats

Mila: Woah ouch, I didn’t mean it like that

Lara: Sorry. I just don’t see why it’s anyone’s business

Mila: Maybe it isn’t but you weren’t exactly telling me to not see Marc were you?

Lara: Because you love Marc and Antoni was a cunt

Lara: To put it bluntly

Lara: Sorry that was harsh. See you in the morning x x

Mila: Yeah goodnight

She turns over, whacking the phone on the bedside table, before sighing and rubbing her hands over her face.

“Ok?”

“Hmm. Can we not talk about it.”

“Shall we talk about your face instead, then.” Marc smiles at the puzzled look before running his thumbs under her eyes and placing a kiss on the end of her nose. “You still had make up on, babe.”

“Urgh. How bad is it?”

“Little bit raccoon.”

“Urgh.” She laughs under her breath before turning into the pillow and groaning as that makes two more black marks, looking back up to see Marc grinning, leaning on his elbow and apple ‘dessert’ [that totally didn’t count as a dessert for her] half eaten in his other hand. “Do you really have to look that smug right now?”

“I don’t know.” Another grin, apple then thrown towards the bin and miraculously making it in there, before he gets off the bed and pulls her after him, depositing her in front of the mirror in the bathroom and picking up the bottle of make-up remover, eyeing it curiously. “This one, yeah?”

_Oh dear._ “Yes…”

_Jeje._ “Don’t you trust me?”

_God, that grin._ “I did until you asked…”

“Jeje.” He squirts some onto his hands and rubs it between the ends of his fingers before putting his hands round her from behind like a fake blindfold, hovering a few inches in front of her, and then suddenly whacks them on and giggles at the resultant squeal.

“Argghh!!!! Cold!!!”

*

Pol: Morning. :D

Mila: It's hardly even light you bastard

Pol: Jaja but you're awake!

Mila: Yeah I had a good alarm call ;)

Pol: Urghhh

Mila: :P

Pol: There was a reason for the early :P I didn't want to wake you up last night

Mila: Ok?

Pol: Um...I don't know who else I could or should tell but I think I saw Tito kiss Alex's girlfriend...??


	48. Edge of Desire

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title - John Mayer. "I want you so bad I'll go back on the things I believe..."
> 
> Thanks so much! Hope you like ♥

Lara: Really sorry, that was mean. X

She sighs to herself, phone going back in her pocket and staring up at the sky for a few seconds, before shivering and turning to go back in, outside smoking in the terrace of the bar, and then stopping and feeling her breath catch. _Why right now, seriously._

“Oh. Hi…”

“Hi.” _Sound less terrified, God._ She smiles at him, feeling the awkward slightly, before taking a deep breath and trying to make her voice as casual as possible. “What are you doing here?”

“Fresh air.”

“Oh I’m sure…”

“Well, no. Honestly I saw you come out here and I thought I’d check if you’re ok.”

“Oh.” 

“But not, you know…just that, just see if you were ok-“

“No, I know. Don’t worry.” She tenses again slightly as he walks towards her, before he goes to lean on the rail next to her and waits, Lara turning to lean next to him. “Why are you still up?”

“I’m not tired. Think it would be worse to lie in bed getting annoyed than try and relax.”

“Ah, ok. Makes sense.”

“It does.” He smiles sideways at her, eye contact making them both shiver for a second, before looking away again and trying to figure out what to say. “You’re ok then?”

“Ah, yes. The reason for your mission.”

“That’s my reason for most things at the moment to be honest-“

“Tito don’t-“

“Sorry. Sorry, forget I said that.”

_Yeah that will be easy._ “I’m ok.”

“You sound convincing.”

“You mean you’re not buying it?”

“Not really. Why are you trying to sell it me?”

“We’re basically strangers, how would you know?” She says it kindly, hint within the words very much understood by the Moto2 rider stood next to her, before biting her lip slightly at the reply and the look on his face.

“I know. I don’t know you at all…” He smiles sideways again, a little more delicious evil in it, before catching himself before the line is crossed and looking straight ahead again. “Anything I can help with?”

“Um…no.”

“Right.” _You mean me. Or Alex? Or both._ “Ok well I will go and try to sleep then-“

“Tito-“ He starts to turn away again to walk back inside, before stopping and ending up face to face with her.

“Yeah?”

“You mean it.” 

“What?”

“How you feel.”

“Yeah.” He smiles, slightly sadly, before putting some hair behind her ear and pulling her in to kiss her forehead. “But I think it’s sunk in now how you feel about him after seeing you after that crash-“

“That was horrible.”

“I know.” He nods, moving away slightly and aware they’re too close but really not wanting to move further, before feeling his breath catch as her hands find his, her looking at the floor.

“Mila showed me what she wrote for the wedding.”

_Right?_ “Ok…”

“They love each other so much.”

_They do._ He nods, letting his voice drop a bit and hoping she can’t feel his hands shaking. “Yeah, I think so.”

“I felt like that, once.”

_Right._ “I can imagine how much it hurts-“

“I think it’s always going to hurt, sometimes.”

“I know.”

“I know you do.”

_Where is this going-_ “Lara, you know you can talk to me? About anything, whenever you want. I know it’s probably hard talking about this stuff with Alex-“

“It wasn’t, before.”

“Ok…”

“I don’t think you’re a good person to talk to, either.”

_Ouch._ “Well I can see-“

“Sorry, sorry.” She takes a deep breath and then looks up, eyes finding his and heart starting to hammer. _I’m not a cheat I’m not-_ “I’m being a bitch tonight but everything just seemed to get pulled into focus today.”

_You love him. This is the part where you tell me you love him-_ “Sometimes that happens. And I don’t think you’re being a bitch, I just think no one can be perfect.”

“Well I’m certainly not perfect.”

_You’re perfect to me._ “I don’t think you’ve done anything wrong.”

“I don’t think you’ve done anything wrong.”

“I think I did a few things wrong. But it’s ok now, somehow. And knowing that you love him-“ He cuts himself off as she shakes her head, heart blasting straight back up to 170bpm, and tries to read the conflicting emotions on her face.

_This should have waited for tomorrow._ “I care about Alex and I always will. He’s been an amazing friend and, well…we had great sex.” She smiles slightly, going slightly red, before biting her lip and looking away. “It’s not the same though.”

_Past tense._ “The same.”

“The same as being in love with him.”

“Oh.” _Oh my God._ He tries to keep his voice and breath steady, no idea if this conversation ends in him being equally as upset as he knows his teammate will be, before pulling her into a hug and feeling her grab on, pressing his lips against her ear and moving them ever-so-slightly from side to side. “I’m really sorry it’s not everything you wanted it to be.”

“Hmm.”

“And I’m really sorry if I made that worse or fucked anything up-“

That actually makes her laugh slightly, under her breath, irony proving too much in what he was apologising for, before she gives him a squeeze and pulls away, emotions more under control and running her fingers under her eyes just in case. “I should go.”

“Ok.”

“You’re really not going to ask.”

“Ask what?”

“You know what.”

“I don’t think I do.”

“Tito…”

“Maybe I can dream what, but-“ He braces himself against the railing as her hands go round his neck and pull him into a kiss, too shocked to respond for a few seconds before she feels his fingertips dig into her back and his mouth opens, tongue finding hers and both moaning into it as all the pent up frustration and feeling tumbles out, ending up breathless and forehead to forehead against the railing.

“Sorry. I have to go-“

“Lara you’re not being a bitch but you can’t just leave now-“

“I have to get back.”

“What does this mean-“

“It means I have to get back to my boyfriend so I can pretend everything’s fine and plan when to break his heart-“

“You’re leaving him.”

“I don’t want to hurt him but I don’t love him.”

_3, 2, 1…_ “Are you leaving him for me?”

*

“Can you read that-“

“Yeah…” Marc closes his eyes, sighing and then opening them to the same expression on her face. “She was obviously feeling a bit defensive last night.”

“Hmm.”

“Hmm?”

“Ok, you want my honest opinion?”

“Always.”

“Then she should be with Tito and she should always have been with Tito. There’s something between them. Alex and Lara are really hot and everything, but they’re just like…”

He raises his eyebrows, interested what that was going to be before she trailed off, and nods at the ceiling as she says it. 

“…they’re just ticking boxes of what they should want. It’s not _true._ ”

_You mean, it’s not as stupidly, amazingly irrational as us._

*

_I don’t even know._ “I…” _have no idea._

“Sorry, you don’t have to answer that, I just…” _I just want you so badly I’ve given up everything I believe in and I’m stood here almost begging my teammate and friend’s girlfriend to run off with me._ “I just want to know how you feel.”

“How I feel.” She’s looking at the floor again, still much too close to him to not feel his presence washing over her in waves, and swallows before daring to say it out loud. “I don’t love Alex.”

“Ok…”

“I think I’m on the wrong side of the garage…”

_Oh my God-_ “Ok…”

“But we can’t just leap into bed together-“

“He’s going to assume that anyway.” _What am I saying._ “I mean…sorry, I’ll wait however long I have to I just-“

_I know._ “I love you. Somehow. I love you and I have since that conversation in the car when you looked at me like I didn’t think anyone was going to again and something got switched on again-“

“Lara?”

“Yeah.”

“Are you being serious.”

“Yes.” She smiles to herself, slightly sadly and letting him take her hands again, before looking up at him. “I love you and I’m so sorry it’s going to come at such a price-”

“I don’t want to hurt Alex.” _but._ “But I think it would still be a bargain.”

*

Mila: She’s not answering me but please, please don’t tell Alex

Pol: I won’t. I don’t like secrets but I think this would hurt him. Is it a one off?

Mila: I’m going to trust you now and you’d better prove me right, Papa Eina :P

Pol: I will always try my best. [Papa Eina jajaja]

Mila: Ok. Tito loves her. We all know that, including Alex. Lara and Alex aren’t working very well [no one’s fault really, just he was shit and then she was shit…you know they just don’t fit perfectly.] Yesterday she read my speech for the wedding, and she decided she had to break up with Alex. Then he crashed, she couldn’t do it, and I bet they’ve run into each other when she’s feeling vulnerable and this has happened.

Pol: God right ok..

Mila: I know. Complicated. 

Pol: Um…not very complicated I don’t think. Just painful for one person in the middle. Assuming Alex cares..

Mila: Alex cares a lot and also, Alex has already had his patience tested quite a lot. He’ll be really upset to lose her but I’m not even sure that will be the worst part

Pol: Sounds like he has, and ouch :/

Mila: But anyway, please don’t tell him.

Pol: I won’t. Being honest, I might have done the other way round because it’s Tito. Maybe we’re not friends exactly but he was my teammate and I know he’s a decent guy.

Mila: Alex is too, Alex is just a bit young I think

Pol: Bet that goes down well when you say it ;)

Mila: Well sometimes he’s the wisest one :P but sometimes he kisses people who aren’t his girlfriend..

Pol: Ah, ok…well that makes me feel a bit less sorry for him

Mila: Hmm I don’t even know what to think, I just know if last night was some kind of decision, then someone should probably go and talk to Michael Bartholemy like…yesterday

Mila: Also I’m a worse cheat than that and I hope you don’t judge me :P

Pol: Sounds like Moto2 war :/ and no, that’s different

Mila: I don’t know if it is, it’s the same feeling of not wanting to hurt someone and not being brave enough to end it

Pol: Yes I’m sure the youngest Danet poster boy would threaten you and jump off a bridge, and then sell you out and sue you

Mila: Good point

Pol: Honestly cheating because you can get away with it and because you’re a liar is one of the worst things, I think.

Pol: But you can’t help who you fall in love with, as Michael Bartholemy is about to find out it sounds like :/

Mila: ♥ thanks I feel a bit better [obviously Marc agrees but he had more to gain from being nice about it ;)]. Btw you’re invited to the wedding. And Aleix and Laurinette if the Espargabros travel in pairs ;)

Pol: I’ve felt better since I’ve got to know you so maybe we’re a bit more even. :D and ooh really?! Well couldn’t have imagined that a few years ago jajaja

Pol: And idk how many people is it going to be?

Mila: Me and Marc, Lara, Alex, Tito, Hector, Santi, Carlos etc…Emilio, Roser and Julia, Guille, couple of friends from Cervera and mine from home, and my mum. And you I hope!

Pol: Well I think let’s not tell my brother you invited him and I’ll come. Sounds small and really I can live in the wild on my own :P

Mila: Aww I know!!! I’m just aware the guest list is either strangers or people you’ve swapped paint with :P

Pol: I can deal with that and honestly I’m so happy you’d want me there :D

Mila: WE want you there [I think my future husband learnt to like you a bit]

Pol: Shit this is awkward because I still hate him

Mila: :P and she just replied…I’ll talk to you later/see you in the paddock x

Pol: Did Marc see that kiss :P x

Mila: Marc’s been reading these since the first one :P

Pol: Red face. Sorry mate, just joking… :O :/

Marc: I cried

Pol: Sure you did

Marc: She speaks the truth though, I’d be glad to have you there. Just don’t bring Yamaha Spies please

Marc: Accidental capital, if you want to bring Ben Spies you can jajajaja

Pol: Jajaja ok no worries, see you later I’m sure, please go slow

Marc: I’ll try ;)

Pol: Cool. I’ll text Ben.

*

Lara: Sorry about everything. Last night I couldn’t sleep and went down to the bar and Tito was there. We talked. I have to leave Alex. We’re not going to just get together like…tomorrow because that would be mean but now I’ve said it out loud I can’t try and pretend…I love Tito and I know it’s horrific and I’m so sorry it’s going to create so much shit for you and Marc and everyone…I hope you’re not mad and I hope you understand [and I’m very sorry for what I said last night]

Mila: I’m not mad and neither is Marc. I understand. Are you ok?

Lara: Half terrible, half walking on air

Mila: I know the feeling. So…when are you going to tell him?

Lara: I don’t know yet but I think he knows something changed

Lara: And I kissed Tito and I feel really guilty.

Mila: Ok, well…I know because Pol saw you, I don’t know how. He texted me a few minutes ago and he’s not going to say anything.

Lara: Shit. :(

Mila: You really know how you feel, you’re not just convincing yourself?

Lara: I really know how I feel. And you know the biggest thing is I don’t feel guilty for how I feel.

Lara: With Alex, sometimes I feel guilty about Joan. Which I know is ridiculous. But it felt like I was somehow cheating on him or his memory or something

Lara: I think Joan would be happy for me if I ever became Mrs Rabat, and that’s something I couldn’t have imagined before

Lara: And I think that’s why I know, and why I told him. And why I’m going to stay in Almería after Cheste and we’re going to figure out how to make it work.

Mila: I wondered about that. You’re serious aren’t you?

Lara: I think we are. He said a coffee is fine, or going for dinner. Or ‘if you feel like I do and you want to live at a race track, just move in with me and we’ll skip the part where we pretend we have to go slow.’

Mila reads that out, Marc smiling sadly to himself and much too aware of the feeling, before she replies and then puts the phone down again.

Mila: Holding back isn’t going to make it less painful for Alex

Mila: Just do it, when you know, you know

Lara: I know

*

_Stop lying to me._ “I don’t care it’s a race weekend. I’m not exactly focused now, just please tell me-“

“We need to talk.”


	49. "Michael Bartholemy"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Given the extra and not as public people mentioned I should stress that this is complete fiction and lies ♥ and anyone mentioned is done so with no harm intended.
> 
> Enjoy?? *eek*
> 
> Thank you so much! ♥

_I guess this is test number one._ He smiles, he knows way too nervously and making it very obvious there was something going on even if Marc hadn’t known, and then cringes as his friend’s eyebrows raise and he stops. “Hi...”

“Hi…”

“She told Mila-“

“Yeah.”

“I’m really sorry-“

“Same. But honestly what can I say?”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean Mila was in a serious long term relationship when I met her, and next week I’m going to marry her. So…”

“Oh. Right.”

“Don’t be weird.”

“Weird?”

“Weird!” The younger man nods, eyes wide and spark of amused knowing in them, before poking his friend slightly and shrugging. “You’re my friend. You’ve not done anything terrible that’s made me wonder why or anything, so…”

“But Alex-“

“I hate that it’s hurt my brother but we are separate people.”

“I know. And…ok, good. So just everyone else is going to hate-“

“Mila doesn’t. Pol doesn’t…” He bites his lip and makes an ‘eek’ face as Tito’s expression goes from nerves to pure horror. _I know._

“Pol.”

“He, er…saw you kiss her. So Mila explained…”

“Shit.”

“He won’t say anything-“

“No but if he saw who the fuck else saw?”

“Honestly I don’t know, but I don’t think it actually matters?”

“What?”

“Well she’s just broken up with him-“

“What?! Already?!”

_Oh._ “Er…yeah? About 5…” He watches his friend go, already jogging through the paddock and drawing a few glances, before pulling out his phone and holding it to his ear as it rings, then the sound of ringing seems to get closer, and closer, until Emilio is poking him in the back and holding up his own phone with an expression Marc can only think to describe as weary. “You hear what happened?”

“How upset is he?”

“You probably need to go down there.”

“Right…” The older man sighs and runs one hand through his hair. “So she’s left Alex? Or she’s left Alex and run off with Tito?”

“I’m not sure. She’s left Alex. She’s going to be with Tito but I don’t know when. Last night she told Mila not straight away-“

“Which won’t make much difference to him-”

“I know.”

“Well…I don’t know. How upset is he? I mean, personally. Crying or mad or what?”

“He’s really upset. I think he thinks he loves her.”

“Ok. Does he?”

“I don’t know. I can only speak for myself.”

“And you think?”

“I think the idea of kissing anyone other than Mila sounds ridiculous no matter how drunk I got. And the idea of not really being there all the time-“

“Ok, ok. So you don’t think so.”

“Honestly I don’t know if I’m the exception or the rule. Have you ever?”

“Ever?”

“Cheated on your wife.”

“Oh. No.”

_That would have been awkward. What the fuck am I saying._ “And would you ever?”

“No.”

“So you see my point…”

“But Alex is-“

“Younger, I know. But he’s Alex.”

“He is.”

“You know you really should go-“ He sighs to himself again, another one run off before the end of the sentence, and rubs his hands over his face before smiling down as his phone beeped.

Mila: Where are you??

Marc: Paddock outside. Emilio and Tito are on the way. Where’s Lara?

Mila: With me in EG hospitality

Marc: Right. Ok?

Mila: He wasn’t very nice 

Marc: I can maybe imagine, he seemed…idk what to call it when I saw him.

Mila: Aren’t you with him?

Marc: No he said he wanted leaving alone for a bit

Mila: Ok. Well Lara is going back to the hotel I think. 

Marc: Ok I should be ready in a bit, are you staying or going?

Mila: She wants leaving alone too. I’m going to come and find you. X

Marc: Ok :) I’m waiting x x 

Mila: Actually maybe come back. Tito got here + Alex came back

Marc: Fuck right ok. Bad?

Mila: Come back

*

He sets off at a slow jog, a few apologies winced to some fans who try and corner him and hoping it’s obvious he’s on his way somewhere, before sprinting the last few steps to the hospitality and almost running into the doors on the Moto2 half as they don’t open straight away, leaving him watching the scene inside before he finally becomes part of it and feels his heart rate amp up. _Shit._

*

“Everybody needs to just calm down-“ Emilio.

“I’m calm.” Tito.

“You would be.” Alex.

“Alex…” Emilio.

“Am I not allowed to be mad when my teammate and supposedly my friend fucks off with my girlfriend?” Alex.

“It’s not like that.” Tito.

“I think we should let it cool off a bit-“ Marc.

“Oh you’re not even on my side? Nice of you to come back-” Alex.

“I’m not on a side. But this isn’t the best place for it. For you or them.” Marc.

“I didn’t realise there was somewhere you’re meant to be when you’re fucked over and get your heart broken-“ Alex.

“I’m sorry I tried to leave it until after the race weekend-“ Lara.

“You could have just not lied and cheated.” Alex.

“I didn’t lie-“ Lara.

“You really expect me to believe you’ve not been fucking each other senseless since Aragon?! I knew there was a reason you’d suddenly decided to come-“ Alex.

“No we haven’t.” Tito. “Not at all. I wouldn’t.”

“Yeah, you’re a fucking great friend! Of course you wouldn’t.” Alex.

“I promise.” Lara.

“Promises get broken though don’t they? Really quickly.” Alex.

“I didn’t-“ Lara.

“Oh no you didn’t! That was me, wasn’t it? Promising to not hurt you and promising to try and understand. Fucking irony.” Alex.

“Alex, you _did_ hurt me.” Lara.

Every single other person in there, which was a few team members and mechanics although no one senior enough to involve themselves, along with Mila, Marc, Tito and Emilio, is now staring at them waiting.

“I kissed someone and I was sorry. Maybe if I hadn’t already felt like such a second best I wouldn’t have.” Alex.

“Do you mean me?” Tito.

“No, mate. I didn’t really know you were planning on being a such piece of shit at the time.” Alex. “I mean the dead guy who was perfect.”

“Alex…” Marc watches the blonde's lip wobble and grits his teeth.

“Alex what?” Alex.

“Seriously, everyone just needs to calm-“ Marc.

“Can I say something?” Mila.

“Whatever.” Alex.

“Right. Well…we were in this situation. Whether Antoni is a dick or not really can’t change the fact that I love Marc. It’s not something you can control-” Mila.

“Well yeah of course you’re on her side.“ Alex.

“I’m not on a side.” Mila.

“Everyone used to be on my side. That’s the whole fucking point of friends and family. Until it’s easier to just tell me to shut up and get on with it-“ Alex.

“I know it hurts-“ Mila.

“Actually I’m not sure you do. Because you’re the one that won. You didn’t jump off a fucking bridge did you? You’ve no idea. You’re getting a wedding and a happy ever after-“ Alex.

“Right, that’s enough. I’m going to say this once.” Marc steps a bit further forward, everyone else already _knowing_ that’s crossed a line and looking at him for his reaction, until he levels his eyes at his brother and raises his eyebrows slightly, Alex already glaring back at him. “Take that back, _right now._ ”

“Truth hurts doesn’t it?”

“Alex, I fucking mean it. That’s not the same. _Take it back._ ”

“No course not. Because it’s you isn’t it? And we’re not the same. You do whatever the fuck you want and everyone thinks it’s great, and I tell you you’re being a cheating prick and then WOW, LOOK WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED TO _ME._ ”

“Right, I’m done. Get out.”

“This is my hospitality-“

“Go back to the hotel Alex.” Michael Bartholemy. “And you, Tito. You come and explain to me in my office what the hell’s going on.”

Nobody moves, silence suddenly incredibly loud and everything on pause, before Marc nods slightly back at the team boss.

“You heard him-“ Marc.

“I don’t fucking believe this.” Alex.

“That makes two of us.” Michael Bartholemy. “Go.”

“But-“

“Alex.” Emilio. “ _Now._ ”

Marc watches him go, teeth still clenched and seething, whether his brother is hurt or not hurt not of much consequence given everything that’s been said, before closing his eyes and taking a deep breath. “Right, show’s over.” He gives it a couple of seconds to check everyone else is at least pretending to have carried on before wrapping his arms round his fiancé and pressing a kiss on her forehead, lips talking quietly into her hair and trying to get at least a semblance of private conversation back. “I’m so so sorry he said that.”

“It’s ok.”

“But it’s not-“

“He’s hurt. It’s ok.” She nods over his shoulder, reciprocating the squeeze and them taking a second to calm down, before pulling away and turning back to Lara, or more where Lara had been, heart dropping and both snapping round to look at the door again. “Where did she-“ 

She stops as the door opens again, this time Tito swearing his way back inside with his hand on his face and her following, and they both stare for a couple of seconds and catch their breath. _Please tell me-_

The older rider moves his hand back from his face to prove it, lip slightly split, and stalks straight up the stairs, Lara following and nothing else said until the sound of the office door banging makes everyone jump and kickstarts the hum of activity again.

“Fuck.”

“Alex wouldn’t hit-“

“But Tito wouldn’t-“

“I don’t even know anymore.”


	50. This Is War

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So so sorry it's been so long. It's a longer chapter to hopefully try and make up for it ♥ 
> 
> Thank you so much and I hope you enjoy it!!
> 
> Title- 30stm

“Ok, where do I start.” The team boss sighs, leaning on his elbows on the desk, and rubs his hands over his face before looking back up at his rider, and then at Lara. “You were Alex’s girlfriend.”

She nods and bites her lip slightly, intimidation factor high given the circumstances. “Yes.”

“And now you’re Tito’s girlfriend.”

“Y-yes.”

“I love her.”

“Wait.” Michael holds his hand up at his rider and nods slightly, certainly not angry but certainly not relaxed, and looks back at Lara. “You’re with Tito now. And I’m guessing it’s serious if it’s worth this.”

“Yes.”

“Ok. So that’s not something that’s going to change, whatever I say, is it?”

“No.”

“Ok. How did you leave Alex? Did you cheat?”

“No. Alex kissed someone else. Alex is young and he’s amazing, but it’s just not right. And luckily or unluckily he’s led me to the person who is right. I told him earlier. That I was leaving him at least. He thinks I cheated-”

“Ok. But he loves you.”

“He thinks he does.”

“Right…”

“If he did, he wouldn’t have acted like he did. I want to be friends with him and I want him in my life but not at the expense of the person I want to spend my life with.”

The team boss takes in a little breath at that, as does Tito, and looks back at his rider to see the faint shimmer of a shy smile. _So that’s mutual then._ “Ok. So, Tito. What happened outside?”

*

Marc: Where are you?

Alex: On my own for a bit

Marc: Want to talk to you. Are you ok?

Alex: You’re a few hours too late to pretend to be my brother now

Marc: You know I could say the same fucking thing

Alex: Be my guest

Marc: Calm down and grow up

*

“Baby. Put the phone down and come to bed.”

“Hmm.”

“Marc?”

“Hmm?”

“You have a race tomorrow and the chance to win the title. In a few months or weeks or even hours, it will hurt Alex more if that gets fucked up.”

_You’re so right._ That makes him take a little breath and nod, hanging his head and relaxing as her arms go round him from behind and then massage his shoulders. “I’m just not sure what to do.”

“You don’t have to do anything-“

“No but-“

“Hear me out.” She whispers that into his ear and then hugs him a bit tighter, his hands going round her forearms and pressing a kiss there. “I used to be like this. With Lara, and with Antoni. But you can’t make everything better just because you want to. You can do your best, and you always do that anyway. Tonight, your best is getting in bed and getting some sleep and waking up tomorrow to take that title.”

“I know you’re right.”

“I know there’s always a but…”

“But I can’t just ignore it.”

“There’s a difference between ignoring it and not caring. He’ll calm down, but I honestly think he’ll do that faster on his own or with your dad.”

“Hmm. He’s never been like this before.”

“Like this?”

“With me. He’s never been so _mean_.”

She hears the catch in his breath and bites her lip to make sure she doesn’t mirror it before standing up straight again and hauling him to his feet. “I know. Maybe he’s never been this hurt before, and you’re the easiest person to take it out on.”

“Not Tito?”

“Not with the team there, no.”

“Hmm.”

“Marc?”

“Hmm?”

“We didn’t do this perfectly, but we’re not bad people.”

“That’s what worries me the most.”

“What do you mean, baby?”

“I mean what does it say about me when my brother thinks this stuff? And, honestly?” He lowers his voice to a whisper. “I don’t even care.”

“You don’t care.”

“I don’t mean I don’t care about him. Obviously I love him more than anyone else than you. I just mean…I wouldn’t do anything differently. And I don’t care what that makes me. That feels like it makes me a bad person.”

“It doesn’t make you a bad person. You just love me.”

“I do.”

“I _know_.”

*

Alex: Please leave me alone

Julia: We want to know you’re ok

Alex: Take a wild guess

Julia: Come on son, this isn’t helping anyone

Alex: I’m 19 not 12. I’m in Cowes and there are some other people here

Julia: Other people?

Alex: Guille’s here. So I don’t need a babysitter

Julia: Be careful

Alex: Few months too late for that

Julia sighs, rubbing his hands over his face, and then puts the phone down for a few seconds before picking it up again.

Julia: He’s in Cowes with Guille

Marc: Ah ok. Not with you?

Julia: Nope. Thought you’d want to know. It’s taken me 3 hours to get a response

Marc: Well I got this: “You’re a few hours too late to pretend to be my brother now”

Julia: Oh son, I’m sorry. He’s just hurt

Marc: Yeah well so am I

Marc: You know if he’d been perfect, then fine

Marc: But he hasn’t been so I hope he has a hangover and comes 21st

Marc: Safely and only once xxx ♥ 

Julia: I know, I understand. How are you?

Marc: Pissed off but alright

Julia: Mila?

Marc: Way more forgiving than he deserves for what he said

Julia: I think she’s just a little further away from him and seeing a bit clearer

Marc: Maybe. Going to try and sleep now. Night x

Julia: Night x

*

“I followed him out because I didn’t want anything happening out in the paddock and wanted him to come back.”

“Ok.” _I sense irony._

“Lara came with me and tried to grab his hand to stop him. She hadn’t said anything and we were behind him so he thought it was me. He smacked her hand away and turned round and half pushed her before he realised it was her. I didn’t realise he didn’t know it was her so I pushed him back and told him to…I don’t even know. I think I told him to get his hands off her and fuck off and grow up or something bad. That I shouldn’t have said because it really wasn’t that bad, he just didn’t realise. So I pushed him and yelled at him, and he hit me. A bit.”

“So he hit you and you didn’t hit him.”

“I got close to it and it happened quickly enough for him to be reacting like I was going to hit him. I think I might have been the same in reverse. Anyone would.”

“You don’t sound like you blame him.”

“He’s hurt.”

“You don’t sound like you blame yourself much either.”

“What Lara said is true. He’s a good friend but he’s Marc’s brother, not my best friend. And it’s not like I’ve lied or cheated or done anything. She knew how I felt before, yeah. But that’s it.”

“Ok.”

“What are you going to do?”

“Who saw you?”

_Yeah there is that bit._ “…Movistar filmed it.”

*

_War at Estrella Galicia Marc VDS: #RufeaTeam rift as reigning champion Rabat steals his teammate’s girlfriend_

*

Guille: He’s a bit calmer now. We’re coming back and hopefully sleeping and making good use of a good quali

Guille: He’s sleeping in my room, bit drunk and not sure I should leave him alone

Guille: Lots of water now and coffee in the morning I think will sort him out

Julia: Thanks Guille, I appreciate it

Guille: That’s what friends are for. No problem, see you tomorrow

Julia: Are you worried about the race?

Guille: In what sense? I think he’ll be ok 

Julia: He’s two places behind Tito on the grid with a good rhythm

Guille: Ah. Yeah I’m not sure. Maybe this is the one race that I hope he can’t keep up 

*

Marc: Have a good race, be safe

Alex: Was it too far to come down from Repsol Honda and say that to my face

Marc: Not really but this is too far

Alex: Yeah it really was

*

Marc: How’s the team situation and how are you?

Tito: Awkward. I’m alright though. You?

Marc: Hmm. Has anyone taken sides?

Tito: Not to my face. We’re just getting on with it and kind of ignoring it. Might talk to my guys later because he was there with Guille for a bit last night and don’t know how accurate the info was

Marc: Hmm ok. Seen any of the press?

Tito: Nope. The team are dealing with it

Marc: Don’t look at it. Did Lara stay with you? Is she ok? I’ve not seen Mila since breakfast

Tito: She did and I’m sorry for saying this but Jesus Christ I have never ever felt anything like that

Marc: First time?

Tito: Er, yes?! We didn’t cheat. [not saying that to make a point, mate.] You really don’t mind me saying this…

Marc: You’re my friend, he’s my brother. It’s ok. 

Tito: Then yes and !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Marc: Jaja ok. How’s Andrea with it?

Tito: Ok. We’re friends now and we’re good at our job. Plus she knows me better than anyone else really and knows I’m not whatever people are saying

Marc: True. She did put up with you for long enough :P ;)

Tito: Jaja true ;) I’m really glad I went out with her for so long

Tito: Because now I have the perfect comparison. And I was upset and I thought she was making a mistake but she really wasn’t. I have the right person now, and she’s happier too. 

Marc: 3 people are happy then!

Tito: I hate that he’s upset

Tito: But what can I do?

Marc: Honestly?

Tito: Please

Marc: Ok well I’m obviously a bad person to judge this stuff but I don’t think you could change it if you tried. I think the only thing you could have changed was doing it on a race weekend or so quickly. BUT I know that was Lara

Tito: She didn’t leave him for me, I don’t know if she said that

Marc: ??

Tito: She left him because she didn’t want to be with him. We were going to leave it until November

Tito: But then everything happened and he assumed and there’s no way I’m letting the love of my life go to sleep crying in Australia 

Marc: That I understand

Tito: You know with you and Mila

Marc: Yeah?

Tito: What was he like?

Marc: Morally upstanding and telling me I was being a dick

Tito: Ah

Marc: He didn’t understand how I felt and he still doesn’t now I don’t think

Marc: I was talking to my dad about this this morning

Marc: We think he cares about her, yes. And he would have been upset anyway. But it’s everything he warned me about biting HIM in the ass, and it’s her with someone else, and his teammate, and it’s just made it into such a mess. Plus he’s competitive and younger and we’re a bit further up the ladder and I think he’s starting to not like that

Tito: Yeah I agree

Tito: They’ve not been together that long

Tito: I was with Andrea a long time and I was upset but I was nothing like this

Tito: I was starting to think he loved her but you don’t think so

Marc: If Lara left you, what would you do?

Tito: Not take it out on her

Marc: Exactly. Be careful in the race today, he’s a bit fired up

Tito: Ok. Yeah always, I know. Good luck if I don’t see you before. I’ll come to parc fermé! [I’m expecting you to win :P]

Marc: Jaja ok. Well the task is easier than last weekend so we’ll see ;) Santi’s had extra maths lessons this year 

Tito: Jajajaja ouchhhh. Good luck!

Marc: Thanks, you too!

*

“Congratulations on the win, Johann. How did it feel out there today?”

“Thank you. Yeah it was a bad start obviously, and I thought maybe they were going to be able to go. But then maybe, I don’t know what’s ‘appening in the team but they have the big battle and I sit there and watch and I think ‘ok I don’t want to be involved in this!’ So I waited to see if one of them would win it or not and then with that pass from Alex on the second last lap I think ‘ok now, they’re both going to crash so I go’. So I went past and concentrate on my lap time and trying to get a gap and the pit board say I have a two second lead or something, so I relax again and I’m really ‘appy. Was a great win for me and my team.”

“Thanks Johann, congratulations.”

*

“So, Tito. Another podium here today. And very hard earnt.”

“Yeah, was a bit crazy, the race. We get in front and I try to pass him and make the gap but he keep coming back so I say, ‘ok, better to stay on the bike and stay behind for a while’. Then he make that mistake and I go in front, he comes back…”

“What did you think to that move on the penultimate lap?”

“I don’t think is a good idea for me to say.”

“Right, ok. Thanks Tito. And congratulations.”

“Thank you.”

*

“So, Alex. Good pace today and on the podium for the 2nd time in your rookie year in Moto2. Where did that pace come from?”

“We’ve been getting closer and I love this track, so was easier than last weekend for me.”

“And a good battle with your teammate.”

“What?”

“A good battle with Tito.”

“Yeah a good battle with him. And I beat him.”

“Did he say anything about the penultimate lap?”

“I haven’t spoken to him.”

“Do you think he will?”

“He’s been trying to talk to me since he stole my fucking girlfriend so probably not. I’m not interested in talking to him.”

_Great._ “Ok, well great race and congratulations-“

“Thanks.”

*

“Is Alex coming?”

“No idea. I-” Julia stopped as his phone went and sighed as he read the message. “No. He’s watching in his garage.”

“Right…”

*

“We must apologise for that language there ladies and gents. Obviously we are broadcasting live and I’m afraid we can’t control what the riders say. And I don’t know if you saw there but Rabat held out his hand to shake-“

“I did, Nick. And Alex wouldn’t.”

“He wouldn’t.”

*

_3 more laps and you’re champion of the world. 3 more laps and you’re champion of the world. 3 more laps and you get to celebrate with at least 2 people-_ He tried to switch off that part of the mantra, now having been trailing Vale in P2 for 4 or 5 laps, before he saw the Italian wobble and made that split second decision that if you gave it longer would seem a much bigger one. _Now._ And then felt the front start to go and wedged his elbow and knee into the ground to try and push it back up, opened the gas again, and then felt the familiar impact of grass and gravel prefaced by the familiar noise of someone else hitting it a millisecond before. _Oh, fuck._


	51. Save Tonight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For about 4 seconds I posted this in the wrong one :/ oops!!
> 
> Hope you like...thank you! ♥
> 
> Title - Eagle-Eye Cherry.

The Italian didn’t get up and scream at him. After 20 years involving similar situations [from both sides] he really couldn’t. Marc got to his feet just as quickly, flicking his visor up and hoping the expression under the helmet said enough as they both scrambled to get restarted and then both gave up in unison, before the younger rider turned back to him slowly.

“Fuck. Sorry. I saw you wobble-”

_Well now it’s more than a fucking wobble._ “Why were you even trying to pass me!”

“I saw you wobble-”

“You had a title and a podium you fucking idiot!”

_I did._ “You would have done the same.” _I think. Right?_

He winced slightly as Vale angrily took a deep breath and then watched as the Italian shrugged, starting to calm. “Maybe.” And then winced again as he realised where they were and the Italian did too, Vale already back to sense and showing the much increased maturity accrued since last having been so spectacularly punted. “Maybe I understand it if I steal your wife, eh?”

Marc shut his eyes for a second with a faint smile of relief, leaning on the tyres on the other side of the fence and Valentino stood near as the scooters approached, both calming down, before clapping him on the arm and nodding in a weary smile. “Sorry. Alex outdid me today.”

“Alex was crazy today. I thought _you_ grew out of it!”

“Jaja, I’m trying.”

“Same.” The spark of mischief was back, somehow, as they both turned to get on the scooters and Vale yelled at a marshal through the helmet, words accompanied by a sly smile back at his aggressor. “I want to arrive back before ‘im, ok? Fucking idiot.” 

“Ok Valentino yes-“

“You owe me a podium, bambino.”

And he couldn’t resist. “You owe me a couple!” And then laughed as the classic behind-the-back wave Vale gave him was this time instead his middle finger. _And now explain to the team why the fuck I thought that was a good idea._

*

Alex: Are you ok?

Marc: Yeah fine thanks. Congrats on the podium

Alex: Thanks

*

Marc: Sorry, again. Couldn’t find you at the track. Thanks for not making my day even worse

Vale: If Jorge beats me to P2 because of this I will need $$$$

Marc: Jaja ok. Thanks mate, sorry

Vale: I’m not going to say ‘it’s fine’ because it’s fucking annoying and Linda doesn’t like the bruise you left 

Vale: But shit happens, I’ve done it before

Vale: You didn’t take your helmet off though…

Marc: Would have done in the garage :P

Vale: Good. Live and learn. You ok?

Marc: Yeah just a bit bruised. You are, I read the update that’s why I didn’t ask

Vale: Jaja never believe the update ;) but I’m fine. See you in Malaysia. I’m not pulling any punches now

Marc: Yeah because you’re always so cautious :P

Vale: Jaja always ;)

*

“We have enough margin, and I thought it was going to be an easy pass, but he saved it. I’m sorry.”

“But you had-“

“Look, I know. Ok? I really know. I also have had it up to here with this whole fucking WEEK and I’m really, really sorry to EVERYONE whose time I’ve wasted, ok? I KNOW. I’m sorry. Really. I’m _sorry_. Sorry, I just-”

“Ok. Ok, calm down. Everyone, calm down. Let’s leave it a few days and-“

“No.”

“No?”

“No point leaving it a few days. I’ve fucked up, everyone’s annoyed, let’s just fucking move on and try again. Ok?”

“Right, fine.”

“Fine.”

*

Dani: Is this still your number?

Marc: Yes! Congrats on the podium

Dani: Hmm thanks for the opportunity ;) you alright?

Marc: Fine thanks. What’s up?

Dani: Good. Are you at the airport?

Marc: Not yet, me and Mila have a day in Melbourne tomorrow, not come up yet.

Dani: Ok. Well I saw the thing on Movistar with Tito and your brother

Marc: Right :/

Dani: Alex is getting drunk in the airport bar and honestly I’m not sure they’ll let him fly

Marc: Shit. Who’s with him?

Dani: some Aussie fans. No one he knows well

Marc: Right. Thanks, I’ll try and sort it

Dani: No problem. If I can do anything let me know. I’m here with Eric and Livio’s flying tonight. [I imagine that would have an effect ;)]

Marc: Thanks Dani

Dani: No problem

*

Tito: He’s drunk in the airport bar

Marc: I know, no one’s answering. It’s going to take us more than 2 hours to get there. Is anyone from the team there?

Tito: No

Marc: Are you all flying tonight?

Tito: No one is from my side. I’m not there, we’re in Melbourne. Pol texted me by accident instead of you. Guille won’t answer other Marc

Marc: Shit right ok. Thanks. 

Tito: Honestly it’s not your responsibility

Marc: Big brother makes it mine

Tito: Acting like an asshole makes it not

Marc: Don’t be harsh

Tito: Sorry. You know what I mean. Let me know if I can help.

Marc: I do and thanks

*

“I don’t know what to do.”

“Well we’re way too far away-“

“Are we?”

“Marc you can’t just go driving 3 hours round Australia because your brother made a shit decision-”

“I can.”

“Ok maybe you CAN, but-“

“Wouldn’t you do that for Lara?”

“That’s different.”

“How?”

“Because Lara doesn’t need to grow the fuck up.” _Ouch._ “You know what-“

“Yeah I know what you mean, great. Can we not start forgetting how this actually started-“

“Oh, I’ve not forgotten how this started.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means I don’t think I’ll ever fucking forget how lovely your best man was the week before I marry-“

“Hey, he’s hurt. No need to be-”

“You know what? So am I. _So am I._ And YES it looks bad and YES I could have done more but really, he doesn’t know what he’s fucking talking about because he’s never cried himself to sleep over someone wondering why they’re being such a cunt but promising they love you. And he’s certainly never listened to someone-“

"No, maybe not. But he's just-“

“No. Not this time. I’m going for a walk.”

“Mila-“

“Just leave me alone for a while.”

*

Pol: Hope it’s not taking too much toll :/

Mila: Amazing timing. Where are you?

Pol: Just back into the city. You ok?

Mila: Back?

Pol: I went with Aleix because we left too late to drop me off first, but I’m flying tomorrow. Want me to call you?

Mila: Please

“Hey.” 

_“Awww no…you sound upset…”_

“I’m…I’m p-pretty upset, yeah.” She lit another cigarette and watched the smoke spiral into the sky for a few seconds before shivering into her coat. “Sorry.”

_“Tell me, princesa. What happened?”_

“You shouldn’t call me that.”

_“I don’t lie. Come on, what happened?”_

“Everything Alex said the other day.”

_Ah. “Yeah…”_

“Me and Marc had a kind of fight about it. When he found out about his brother in the airport and he’s on about driving up there to find him…”

_“You’re still on Phillip Island aren’t you?”_

“Yeah. Exactly. It’s hours. And I said that was too much. So he asked if I’d do that for Lara…and I said it was different because Lara didn’t need to learn to grow up…”

_“Ok…”_

“And then he got defensive and I got annoyed because Alex has got no fucking right to judge me or us because he didn’t live through it. And ok so I was a coward and I didn’t leave but I’m not the devil and if even someone like that that I’m starting to love and feel like is part of my family thinks that then what-“

_“Hey, shh. No. Ok so maybe I’m not really wise…but maybe I have a BIT more perspective…he’s hurt. And things like this are always harder as the younger one, I think. Which maybe sounds weird. But it’s everything all at once…he’s lost Lara and to his teammate and a guy who’s older. He probably half feels like he’s lost Marc to you. He’s still young and under a ton of pressure and he’s not at the top anymore. Maybe he’s close now, and he’s a very, very good rider. But he came from a title in Moto3 to a bike in Moto2 that was a bit hard to ride, and had to adjust…and he’s not Alex the Superstar anymore this year. I don’t mean he was a diva because honestly sometimes it’s hard to even get eye contact he’s that shy. I just mean it’s a lot to take in. Everything in his life has changed in the past year and the things that probably made him feel stable and able to deal with it all are the things that have kind of gone at once…like Tito’s been his benchmark and Lara was important. And they’re both-“_

“Ok, I know I know. I get what you’re saying.”

_“It’s no excuse for it, it just explains it a bit-“_

“It does.” _Deep breath._ “It does. And I can see it and I understand his reaction to Marc, I guess? That’s always more complicated in a family. But I’m the one who…I’m the one who had him crying into my shoulder when he’d fucked up and I-“

_“It’s not you and that’s not what he really thinks. Ok? I promise.”_

“And then Marc took his side.”

_“That’s not what you said before...you said defensive…”_

“Same thing.”

_“No. It’s not. I know…”_

“How do you know?”

_“Because Aleix sometimes does the same thing and it annoys Laura so much. I think they’re just used to it. Being a big brother. I don’t think he agrees with Alex at all, he’s just…I don’t know. It’s just instinct and his head’s probably fucked after today anyway.”_

“Why am I the one who has to understand.”

_“I know. You’re really not.”_

“I just…I love Marc so much. Everybody knows, I know. We’re pathetic. But it means things like this HURT so, so much. So much more than anything. And he didn’t even-“

_“Aww babe don’t cry. I’m so sorry I’m not there.”_

“It sh-shouldn’t be you though, should it. Sorry. You know what I m-mean-“

_“Yeah, I know what you mean. Where’s Marc now?”_

“Don’t know. And thank you, I’m going to go and get a drink and calm down and go back inside now. Ok?”

_“Ok, that sounds like a good plan. Call me if you need me. Or text. And if you’re really really desperate, I might be able to manage to lend you the second bed in my room…”_

She smiled at that, fake reluctance appreciated, and then took another breath, trying to calm down. “Ok. Thank you. So much.”

_“Anytime. When I’m not riding. And honestly I’m wired after the race so I can come and get you as well. Just say.”_

_Awwww._ “Thank you. I mean that, thank you."

*

Pol: Sorry I texted Tito instead by accident but heard you got the message

Marc: Yeah thanks, I appreciate it. I did.

Marc: You talk to him?

Pol: No, Mila

Marc: Oh great

Pol: ???

Marc: Nice try, I’m sure you’ve already had the rundown of why I’m a dick

Pol: Ouch. That was a private conversation because she was upset, no bitching or anything stupid. We’re friends

Marc: I love this. It feels great to know one of my biggest rivals gets the fucking inside line on my marriage before it’s even official

Pol: ok calm down

Marc: Just fuck off

Pol: Fine. Sleep well, dick

*

Marc: Please answer me baby

Marc: I know you have your phone

Marc: Please babe

Marc: Please

Mila: You spoke to Pol, yeah I know you know I have my phone thanks

Marc: Oh great so I wasn’t even wrong

Mila: Yeah he called me back and we bitched about you for an hour or two. Cannot believe you said that.

Marc: Don’t

Mila: Don’t what? Is the truth better, that POL OFFERED TO LET ME STAY WITH HIM TONIGHT AND PICK ME UP AND YOU HAVEN’T EVEN FUCKING CALLED

Marc: I did call!

Mila: Once, when I was on the phone

Marc: Exactly

Mila: You chose a great night to get jealous

Marc: I’m not jealous, it’s just horrible knowing you talk to him, I'm sorry

Mila: Would you prefer me to not have friends

Marc: Never. You know it’s just weird and I’m sorry. And I’ll apologise to him

Mila: Yeah well I’m not sorry because my friend made me feel better and you aren’t doing

Mila: Goodnight

Marc: Mila don’t, please

Marc: Please baby

Mila: Not tonight, I’ll see you in Melbourne tomorrow and I’ve taken the hire car

Marc: Don’t be stupid

Mila: I’m already over the bridge

Marc: Then I’ll come too

Mila: Yeah so you can go and see Alex, ok

Marc: No, you come first

Marc: I promise

Mila: It’s not about first and second, it’s about who is to blame and who is being an idiot 

Mila: I’ve not done anything and we fought and I HATE IT because I love you so much

Mila: But then you take it out on Pol and make it worse

Marc: I know. 

Mila: Great ok then, night

Marc: Please don’t, I need you today, seriously ♥

Mila: I needed you and you weren’t there. I love you but not tonight

Mila: I mean, I still love you tonight

Mila: I just need some space

*

Mila: I’m on my way and I hope it’s two singles

Pol: Aww shit. What happened?

Mila: I’ll talk to you soon and please prepare a hug

Pol: Always

*

Marc: I’m sorry

Pol: I don’t really care. I kind of expected it to happen eventually

Marc: I’m sorry, really. I’m not jealous. I’m just honestly having the shittest day and weekend of my life and I just got frustrated. I’m sorry. And thank you, so much. Please look after her

Pol: Mate I know it’s probably horrible in the middle of it but it’s not her fault

Marc: I know. I’ve tried and I made it worse and now I’ve calmed down and I don’t know what to do

Marc: And I had to ask Dani, DANI!!! to try and deal with Alex

Marc: He’s apparently sobering a bit and they found some of the team and there’s people there now

Marc: And I know that’s not my responsibility and I know I probably should have just called VDS or my dad 

Marc: But that’s how we are. You understand?

Pol: Yeah I understand, Aleix is the same

Pol: But Alex and maybe Lara a bit have been idiots

Pol: Not Mila

Marc: I know, I really know

*

Mila: I know it’s late but I stopped for some food. Probably be there about 1130 x

Pol: Ok, no problem. I’m awake!

*

Pol: She’s stopped for food and says she’ll be here at 1130 ish

Marc: Ok. Let me know when she arrives that she’s ok, please?

Pol: No, if you set off in 10 mins and slightly break the law you can beat her here

Marc: Seriously

Pol: I’m not trying to steal your girlfriend and I don’t want her to be upset. “Seriously” :P

Marc: I don’t know if that would upset her more tbh, she said space and think she meant it

Pol: Trust me, grand gestures never upset people!!

Marc: really though?

Pol: Yes. Decide! Now!

Marc: Ok yes. You’re right. I hope. Yeah? Hotel?

Pol: Hilton South Wharf, room 249

Marc: God thank you

Marc: THANK YOU

Pol: GAS

*

Marc: Alex was drunk in the airport, Dani and now team guys have sorted it

Marc: I’ve had a big fight with Mila and Pol [and about Pol, and me getting frustrated] and she’s set off back to Melbourne in our car

Julia: Oh dear. Anything I can do?

Marc: Can I borrow your hire car?

Julia: Are you insured?

_Classic dad question._

Marc: Yeah I’m on all the hired Hondas and so is Dani

Julia: Then yes. Can I do anything else?

“Hi.”

_Hi._ Julia stared at him for a second, everything from the last two days almost visible on his face, before pulling him into a hug and feeling him hang onto him for a few seconds. _Oh dear._ “What can I do?”

“Rewind?”

“I can try…”

“No, that’s ok. I just…” _Deep breath._ “I need to get going.”

“Ok. I’ll check you out and bring the other bags tomorrow. Yeah? I'll sort it out.”

_Thank you._ “Thank you.”

“No problem. Is this a good idea?”

“It was Pol’s idea so maybe not?” He managed a weary smile before sighing and rubbing his hands over his face. “I don’t know.”

“Want to talk about it?”

“Hmm. Not much to say. Don’t think I realised how much Alex hurt her yesterday and how much it bothers her. Didn’t say the right things. It kind of snowballed and then I got annoyed about Pol because I’m bruised and frustrated and everything is going wrong. And that made it worse.”

“Ah. Is she in Melbourne now then?”

“She’s on the way. I apologised to Pol and he said she’s stopped on the way and I could beat her there.”

“Don’t go too fast-“

“I won’t be stupid, I promise. Done enough of that tonight.”

“Hey, you’ve had a bit of a rough week-“

“Yeah well so has everyone.”

“Not quite the same.”

“Hmm. Whatever. She’s right, anyway. And I’ve upset her and I just want to go there and…you know. I just need to go there.“

“Ok. Ok, I get it. She doesn’t know you’re going?”

“She asked for space but Pol said grand gestures are worthwhile and I agree. You think?”

“I agree too.”

“Right. Then I’ll see you tomorrow.” _Definitely not wrong, then._ He pulled his dad into another hug before smiling slightly as he got his hair ruffled. _Thank you thank you-_ “Thank you.”

“No problem. Please be careful.”

“Always.”

*

Pol: Set off yet?

Marc: Yeah, should be there by 1115

Pol: Ok, she’s still waiting for her food

Marc: ok! 

*

Pol: I’ve told the hotel you’re coming and to let you into the parking with my room number 

Marc: I’m going to buy you so much beer

Pol: Not 0,0

Marc: Jaja NO!

*

“Hi.” _Ok, face to face is certainly more weird._ “I guess she’s, er…she’s not here yet?”

“Nope. You made it. She’s just coming into Melbourne I think.”

“Cool.”

“Oh, sorry. Come in.” The other Catalan rider moved aside slightly and smiled again as Marc went past him into the room, feeling the same ‘funny under different circumstances’ weirdness as the younger rider and smiling a bit more in response. “Room service?”

“What?” Marc grinned slightly at that, and the grin on his rival’s face at the accidental gay date invitation, before it clicked. “Ohh. Yeah, good idea. Champagne maybe. I got a room by the way. I’m not expecting you to disappear.” _Please smile._

“Jaja, ok! Where?”

“4 down the hall.”

“Right, ok. Switch?”

“Switch?” _Seriously._ He looked at him for a few seconds, incredulous, before feeling another wave of relief hit him. _Please._

“I’m not unpacking because it’s one night and I’ve not slept in the bed yet, so…”

“Seriously.”

“Seriously?! She has the room number so I can’t just hide and pretend I’m not in-“

“No, I mean seriously you would do that.”

“It’s just a bed.”

“Yeah but I was such a dick to you.”

“Jeje, well…”

“Don’t.” The younger rider cringed slightly and nodded, another stressed little sigh appearing after it and another weary yawn interrupting a nod. “I know.”

“Honestly, it’s fine. Switch keys back in the morning, yeah?”

“Ok.” He watched the other rider start heading for the bathroom and gathering stuff before taking a deep breath and trying to find the words, still on the awkward side of normal. “Pol?”

“Hmm?”

“I am really sorry. And seriously, thank you so, so much.”

“Honestly, it’s fine. Just please, please don’t let me get another phone call-“

“You won’t. Promise.”

"Then no problem."

*

Mila: I’m just parked and heading in

Pol: Ok, 249!

*

Pol: Parked and on the way, 2 minutes

Marc: Champagne just got here :)

Marc: Thank you

Marc: And I'm sorry

Pol: You're welcome

Pol: Just make her smile this time!

Marc: It's in my vows but I'll try and start early.

Pol: :) night


	52. Sense and Sensitivity

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait again...and thank you so much! And the next chapter is 53... ;) :D

_God I need a hug._ She ran her fingers under her eyes before taking a deep breath and nodding, hand moving up to knock on the door. _And Pol hugs are amazing. Just wish it was-_

The thought gets cut off as the door starts to open, her waiting to grin at Pol as best she can, and then feeling all the breath leave her as it's instead dark apologetic eyes, dark hair, and a rose clenched in his teeth, making the world sway in disbelief for a few seconds. _How do you do this._

"Marc..."

 _Please be happy to see me._ "Hey. Good surprise?" He feels another little wave of guilt hit him as she nods and kind of falls around him, nodding against his chest and leaving him to kick the door shut and move them further into the room. _I think that's a yes._ "Look babe I'm so sorry, ok? I'm so sorry and I've apologised to Pol as well, and I just...just please-"

"It's ok." She pulls away, eyes finding his and still a bit wet, before pulling him into a kiss and feeling the relief flood through them. "It's ok and I'm sorry if I overreacted-"

"You didn't-"

"Maybe. And I just..." _Can't believe you're here._

"Did I make a good decision?" He whispered the words low into her ear before letting his shoulders relax at the definite _yes_. 

"Where is Pol-"

"We switched."

"He helped-"

"Yes, he was my knight in fucking shining armour..." He lets the guilt show a bit more on his face before smiling at the slight _I told you so_ on hers and running his fingers through her hair as he leant down to rest their foreheads together. "Sorry."

*

Marc: You want to have lunch with us?

Pol: Are we friends now? :P

Marc: For me, yes we fucking are. We're in chinatown too...

Pol: SUSHI

Marc: An hour. GAS!!!!

Pol: Text me the address and don't tell Aleix :D

Marc: Jaja ok! Tito and Lara are coming too

Pol: Ok! See you in a bit :) (I'm guessing it went ok)

Marc: YES :D

*

Marc: Are you still down there?

Santi: Yes?

Marc: Long story but embarrassing outcome and I need your help

Santi: Oh God...

Marc: So I pissed Mila off last night and she left and I drove up to beat her to Melbourne and surprise her (all good, best decision ever)

Marc: But that means my dad is packing up the last few things of my stuff and checking me out the hotel there

Marc: I would really rather no one saw some things but especially not him and please can you go in the room and er...put the stuff from the top left bedside drawer in a bag and never let my dad see it. I forgot it.

Santi: Oh God. Is it bad?

Marc: It's clean...

Santi: :O

Marc: Jaja no it's ok, not too terrible. Just not for parents.

Santi: But ok for crew chiefs...

Marc: Preferably no one but crew chiefs better ;) 

Santi: Jaja God ok, I'll go now

Marc: Thank you!

Santi: Right sorted, I beat him there

Marc: THANK YOU again...and sorry :/

Santi: Can I ask a question

Marc: Oh God 

Santi: You use this stuff often or just for a wedding and honeymoon...?

Marc: Really not sure I want to answer that :P

Santi: I'm curious

Marc: Pff

Marc: Most of it more than once a week

Marc: Handcuffs less because they leave marks

Marc: Now don't tell anyone, ok? :P

Santi: I won't and thanks for telling me

Marc: Bit weird :P

Santi: I thought I had a good sex life, maybe not quite ;)

Marc: Is that a lot?

Santi: Hmm I don't really know!

Marc: Does everyone else not fuck every day?

Santi: Jesus seriously?!

Marc: Unless one of us is injured yeah usually?

Santi: So this stuff isn't even the half of it

Marc: Maybe half of it

Marc: Or maybe quarter

Marc: There is a reason why we have some lockable drawers at home ;)

Santi: I love my wife

Santi: But Jesus fucking Christ are you a lucky man

Marc: Tell me about it ;) 

*

@marcmarquez93: Sushi in Melbourne!! :D pic.twitter.com/jdsubsf

*

 _And suddenly everything is a bit better._ He opened his eyes with a bit of brain delay, surroundings obviously different to those the day before, before smiling to himself, eyes closed again, as he felt her murmur and cuddle round him again. _A lot better._ "Morning babe."

"Hmm, morning."

"Sleep ok?"

"Better than on the plane."

"Hmm, same."

"Sorry about that."

"What?"

"Sorry about the singing."

 _Oh._ He suddenly felt that come back to him and giggled, her joining in but muffled under the covers. _OH._ "Jeje. I don't think it's you who needs to apologise to be honest..."

"Jeje, maybe true." She managed to struggle up into daylight, looking down at him for a couple of seconds, before leaning into a kiss and feeling his hand tangle in her hair. "I wonder if he'll remember."

*

PolEspargaro: Apologies to everyone on the flight last night, Phillip Island was a great result :D ;)

@marcmarquez93: @polespargaro Don't try and make a living out of it #tuneless

PolEspargaro: @marcmarquez93 jajajajaja says YOU

@bailadoramila: @marcmarquez93 @PolEspargaro congrats on the podium but please never sing again, either of you

@PolEspargaro: @bailadoramila @marcmarquez93 rude

_Marc Marquez favorited your tweet!_

*

@alexmarquez23: Sorry @TitoRabat for the contact and language on Sunday, will be good to race again in Malaysia.

*

Tito: You mean that?

Tito: Alex?

Alex: What

Tito: The tweet

Alex: What tweet

Tito: The sorry tweet

Alex: I didn't tweet anything

Alex: It was fucking Hector. No I don't mean that, stop trying to talk to me and fuck off

*

Marc: Nice gesture :)

Alex: It was Hector

Marc: Oh :/

Alex: I'm talking to Emilio about it

Marc: What do you mean?

Alex: I mean as of an hour ago, Hector Martin is no longer employed by me

Marc: Don't be stupid, it's good for your image

Alex: Yeah maybe, it's also fucking dishonest and he didn't even ask

Marc: You don't have to fire him

Alex: Too late

Marc: Alex...

Alex: Sorry I'd better check with Hector before i reply

Marc: Seriously.

Marc: Hello?

Alex: Just seen Emilio. He's my manager but I'm tweeting myself and no more hector

Marc: English?

Alex: Ian will help I already asked

Marc: Is that a good idea?

Alex: That's up to me

Alex: So it's the only honest idea we have

*

Hector: I guess you heard

Marc: Yeah, sorry. He'll calm down

Hector: Hmm

Hector: I need to talk to you actually. Too much Pol

Marc: Sorry but that's not going to change. Mila and Pol are friends and me and Pol are really now.

Hector: Right ok

Marc: Also I do think that was wrong tbh

Hector: What?

Marc: Tweeting for him, that was wrong

Marc: Don't do that for me without permission, ok?

Hector: I thought this was a bit different

Marc: Yeah it is, but still

Hector: Right ok

Marc: Thanks

*

Hector: You're happy with Artur

Jorge: Yeah thanks, the sex is great

Hector :P you know what I mean

Jorge: Trouble in Monlau paradise?

Hector: I tweeted the Alex apology without asking

Jorge: Ouchhh

Jorge: Seriously?!

Hector: Which bit?

Jorge: It's enough to beg me :P

Hector: Jaja no :P just checking ;)

Jorge: Did he fire you...

Hector: Alex? Yeah

Jorge: But not Marc

Hector: Jaja God no

Jorge: Is Alex still with Emilio?

Hector: Yeah. Difficult but ok

Jorge: right. So who's doing english?

Hector: God knows

*

@alexmarquez23: Great first day in Malaysia having a few beers with the boys ;) pic.twitter.com/hdusf

*

Hector: Someone british it seems...

Marc: Ian from VDS

Hector: That's not going to end well

Marc: Not up to me

Hector: Have you all given up?!

Marc: He's 19. I love him to death but it's up to him

Hector: Hmm. How is it between you?

Marc: The longest we've ever gone without properly talking or hugging

Marc: And we have a wedding next week where the two best men want to kill each other 

Hector: Yeah I'm sorry

Marc: Hmm we'll see. Where are you?

Hector: Hotel

Marc: We're in the travellers bar or whatever, come down

Hector: ok, see you in a few

Marc: Pol's here, so you know :P

Hector: Jajaja he's alright, I just worry about you :P

Marc: I'm drinking diet non alcoholic drinks with the love of my life and going to win the title on Sunday, I'm alright ;)

"Good."

"He appears!"

The older man grinned at Marc, greeting him and the other guys with a nod and smile before leaning in to kiss Mila and Lara on both cheeks. "Can I get anyone a drink?"

*

am73fanno1: So looks like @marcmarquez93 took the wrong side #Cheatssticktogether

am73fanno1: Hope you're happy with yourself @TitoRabat, he deserved better

_Alex Marquez favorited your tweet!_

*

_Alex Marquez favorited a tweet you were mentioned in!_

He looked at it, fuming again, and then put down the phone and took a few deep breaths as he counted to 10 to calm down. _Bad fucking idea._

Tito: He favorited that tweet

Hector: I saw

Tito: So stop him being a dick?

Hector: I don't work for Alex anymore

Tito: Seriously?!

Hector: Yup. Just Marc. 

Tito: God sorry

Hector: That's ok. Job's easier now even after this year

Tito: Hmm. Want to work for me?

Hector: What?

Tito: Do you want to work for me?

Hector: Doing what?

Tito: Same as you do for Marc, easier job because there's way less of it but I can't keep reading through all this shit and neither can she

Hector: Pay?

Tito: What were you getting from Alex?

Hector: Contract percentage

Tito: Right well if we do temporary until the end of the season and I pay you a third of the percentage Alex did, is that alright?

Hector: Yes!

Tito: Ok cool. My password is predictably lara54

Hector: 54?

Tito: 53 + 1 ;)

*

Hector: Alex needs to stop favoriting fan tweets about my rider please

Ian: Talk to Alex then, I'm not his mother

Ian: They're about marc?

Hector: Tito, new client

Ian: Right well talk to Alex

Ian: I'm just the translator

Hector: He won't be at VDS forever, please bear that in mind

*

alexmarquez23: Starting the day with Moto3 from the box with some smuggled Pascucci ;) it's fucking hot in Sepang! pic.twitter.com/busvd

Emilio: Language

Alex: Yes my English is improving. Thanks.


	53. Whenever, Wherever

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait <3 hope you like it!!
> 
> Tito's number = Tito's chapter ;) <3
> 
> THANK YOU!!!

_And here we are. Alone. Properly. And together._ He takes a deep breath, door shutting behind them and silence suddenly seeming loud, before holding his breath as she dumps her bag and turns back to face him. _Really I get you forever. Really._ "What do you want to d-" He loses the words into a kiss, a proper kiss, as she crosses the space between them and throws her arms round his neck, the taste of Marlboro and red wine and a hint of salt from too many tears swirling around his tongue, before bracing them back against the door as her hands wander under his shirt and they pause for a gasp of air. _Wow. Wow wow wow-_

"You're sure you want me-"

"I love you."

"I love you too." This one is shared through a teary smile, pressure of the day starting to wear off and reality of tonight starting to sink in, before he's losing his t shirt and she's letting hers follow, walking slowly back intertwined together towards the bed and fingers exploring the new skin exposed for the first time, Tito feeling a jolt hit him straight in the crotch as she nips his lip and pulls him down on top of her. He stays there propped over her for a few minutes, taking time to explore each other and the rush somehow dissipated as the permanent reality of the situation starts to sink in, before the kisses move lower and the hairs on the back of his neck stand up as he pops open the top button on her jeans, pulling them off and then hooking one finger in each side of her underwear and pausing for a split second kiss before they follow the jeans onto the floor. He stares down for a second, eyes overwhelmed slightly by what he's looking at, before he starts at her neck and moves down to her collarbone, then lower and circles a nipple with his tongue, then a long, teasing line from her navel to her crotch that ends with her hand tangled in his hair as his tongue flicks out and the noise she makes seems to shiver over him. He tries to listen to the reactions, fingers teasing inside as his tongue flicks again, and feels his own crotch almost explode at the same time as her breath gets quicker and her back arches, a long moan at the ceiling as she comes and her muscles contract around his fingers, that making him sure at least that she's not faking. She pulls him down again, his knee ending up wedged between her legs and that making her whimper slightly, before they wrestle the rest of his clothes off and pause again, eye to eye and forehead to forehead, a lot being said in the silence, and he slowly pushes inside with a low groan that gets lost around her tongue. He feels them pulled together as her legs go round him and just about manages to control himself and thrust, finding a slow and deliberate rhythm together and kisses accurate enough at the same time, until her fingernails are digging in and the signal's received and he starts to let himself go, fingers finding her clit again and moving in time until his senses are on overdrive with the faint smell of perfume, and her, and the noise, and the feeling of being so connected, and he hears her breath catch and lets himself go at the same time, orgasm intense and hers only making his even better as they time it right, ending up stuck together in a heap on the bed panting at each other. _Was I as good as him._ "I love you." He whispers it in her ear before he gently pulls out, sudden doubts back again, before feeling himself relax as she pulls him in and curls round him, completely flush against him and head buried in his chest.

"Wow."

 _Say you love me too._ "Was that-"

"Incredible." She whispers that closer to his ear before pulling him into a kiss again and running her finger down his cheek as his eyes open to find hers. "And I love you too."

"You promise-"

"I love you and that was perfect."

*

 _Urgh. Sunshine. Sunshine and P3._ He frowns slightly against the light before she moves and the numbness in his arm suddenly makes sense, and his eyes open to find yes, she's real and it was real and the dream wasn't even better than the reality this time. "Hey."

"Hey." The word comes out muffled against his chest and accompanied by a smile he knows is there despite not being able to see it, and he runs his fingers gently through her hair as she stirs further and looks up enough to get eye contact. _Wow._ "So this is what I look like in the morning..."

He smiles at that, nodding into a quick kiss, before settling down eye to eye over the pillow and finding her hand with his under the covers. "Beautiful."

"Don't pity me, Mr Rabat."

"No pity. Just love."

 _Aww._ "I'm so sorry everything happened-"

"So am I. But it doesn't change anything, and I have you. So there's no reason to apologise."

"I love you. You know. I hope you believe me and you know-"

"I'll tell you a secret." He leans in even further and presses his lips to her ear, her smiling and closing her eyes. "I love you too. And I was scared before last night. But now I'm not scared any more."

"Ok."

"Ok..."

"More than ok." She opens her eyes again, grinning, and pulls him in for a proper kiss. "Maybe the best night of my life, in the end."

*

Pol: This is getting ridiculous now

Tito: What?!

Pol: I have a house and a dog and I'm ready to go and it's all you people who have the long term girlfriends

Tito: Ah so you heard

Pol: I did. Happy for you.

Tito: Thanks :) and there was no cheating. Just that kiss which was a mistake

Pol: I know you're not that guy :) what's she like...

Tito: Definitely not answering that :P

Pol: Jaja was worth a try. ;) She scares me

Tito: Yeah she scared me. Underneath though she's just like me and you

Tito: But way, way more perfect

Pol: Aww :) are you going to get a dog?

Tito: No I'm not getting a fucking dog

Pol: Jajaja FINE guess the husky walking club will have to remain at 2 members

Tito: Jaja have fun together

Tito: And don't steal a Marquez girlfriend, trust me! :/

Pol: Jaja aww no, I love Mila as a great friend :) also I'm coming to the wedding

Tito: Hmm worried about that tbh... :/

Pol: Worry about that when you have to. Today enjoy your first day together :)

Tito: :) that's the plan. Started off well anyway... 

Pol: Oh?

Tito: You'll think it's ridiculous...

Pol: Tell me at lunch! 

Tito: Oh God you're not coming are you? ;)

Pol: Just got invited :P careful, I'm stealing your Rufea friend

Tito: Nope, you're not :P

Pol: So sure...

Tito: Yep! ;) You haven't passed the Roser test :P

*

"Lara."

"Hmm?"

"You ok?" He sits down next to her, having spent a few minutes wondering if he should go out onto the balcony or not, and then relaxes as she nods and snuggles under his arm. 

"Good. Well, some things bad. The other things, the best they've ever been. I mean... _ever_."

"Good. Well, you know what I mean. That bit." _And wow._

"I do." _Deep breath._ "And I have something to ask you."

He feels his heart start to thunder, glee and disbelief fighting for supremacy, before burying his face in her neck and nodding through it as it's actually what he thought.

"Not yet. But sometime? I just want to check. Would you marry me? Ever? And you want kids, right? And-"

"Whenever you want. _Whenever._ "


	54. Don't Let Me Down

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title and lyrics Mila thinks about are the Beatles. :)
> 
> Guys...so sorry about the wait on this, seriously ♥ I've been so busy and given everything on and off track this one's been hard to get into. I really hope you like it and thank you so much for reading etc, it means so much!
> 
> Here we go... *deep breath*

_They really weren’t kidding about the heat._ Roser huffed slightly again, trying to cool herself down, as she finished her post-flight cigarette and turned back to the airport building ready to head to the hotel, Julia giving her a quick squeeze and nodding his agreement.

Roser: I’m just on my way. Are you all there?

Marc: Me and Mila are in the bar with Eric and Dani :) can’t wait to see you!

Roser: :). Where’s your brother?

Marc: Don’t know. I’ve not really known that for a while :/

Roser: Ah, ok. And your other brother?

_Awww._

Marc: Tito and Lara are staying in for food and watching a movie, they don’t want to make it worse.

Roser: Ok. :) we’re here. The bar on the left?

She looked up as there was a “HELLO!” from across the room, Marc appearing grinning from behind a pillar in the lobby bar, and then rocked them from side to side in the hug as he reached her in a sprint, Mila following at normal speed and receiving a calmer hug and cheek kisses. “So how are you? Excited?”

“So excited.” The Honda rider nodded as his fingers wound through Mila’s, turning to look at her and the expression taking the older woman’s breath, somehow having forgotten slightly quite how much adoration always came pouring out of him. _Well, both of you._ She shared a little knowing look with Julia as Mila locked eyes with Marc and squeezed his hand, and then took her husband’s hand as Marc whacked a quick kiss on his fiancé’s cheek. _Both of you._ “Some things could be a bit better though..”

“Hmm, I know.”

“He’s not fucking this up.” The older brother surprised himself slightly with the tone before taking a little breath and clearing his throat. “Sorry. Just worried…” _And want him back._

_I can very much understand that._ “I’m sure it will be fine by then. Or at least, enough. Now where’s my drink, eh?” She grinned as Marc smiled back, clouds gone again, and then nodded as her son yelled an order of red wine up to Eric and started to lead them back over to the table, the two Pedrosas smiling and greeting the new arrival and being just gentlemanly enough with chairs that Roser let them off the lack of kiss. _Your teammate, his brother, your fiancé and my husband all say hello, and my youngest doesn’t even know I flew in today._

“Cheers!”

*

_Don’t wake him up._ She took another few deep breaths, tonight the first night in a long time for a flashback or memory of everything to have hit, and closed her eyes for another few seconds, counting down from 10 in her head. _Don’t wake him up._ She turned over a bit further to look at him, arm lazily draped around her waist and face peaceful on the pillow facing her, and tried to stop her fingers digging into his other hand too much, too tangled up to want to risk trying to get up for a while. _He’s here though. He’s here and we’re in an incredible city to fight for a world title before we escape to a perfect hotel and marry each other._ That brings a bit more warmth back, ring on her finger suddenly seeming to announce itself again, until she’s snuggled into his chest and taking a few more breaths as he automatically curls around her. _I’m in love for the first time…don’t you know it’s going to last…_ Quick peck on the lips. _It’s a love that lasts forever…it’s a love that had no past…_ That makes her wobble again, song having been following her around since Santi had been humming it earlier in the day, and the breaths get quicker until she jumps slightly at the sudden extra noise of the whisper.

“I’m awake, baby. Tell me.”

*

“Are you awake?”

Roser nodded into the pillow, turning over to face him, and raised her eyebrows. “What’s wrong?”

“I’m glad you’re here.”

_Awww._ She nodded back at that, having known the feeling from the other side of the scale back in Catalunya, and leaned into a quick kiss. “I’m glad I’m here.”

“I’ve never seen him like this before.”

“Which one…” The bittersweet smile seems to contain everything they’ve not really said out loud, growing up and moving on and worrying and pride and hurt and everything else, before she laces her fingers through his and takes a deep breath. “I’m sure he just needs a bit of time and space and he’ll be back, even more amazing than before.”

“I hope so.”

_Time and space we don’t really have before he’s the first best man in a wedding he probably doesn’t even want to go to._ “He’s a good person, and that will win in the end. I’m very, very sure.”

“He is and it will.” Julia leaned into a quick kiss before turning the light off again. “He’s also riding recklessly, disappearing straight from the track, and won’t talk to anyone that tries.”

“No one…”

“Just Guille.”

“Have a little faith, eh?”

*

_Don’t don’t don’t don’t-_ “S-sorry-“

“Don’t be sorry.” Marc shook his head, sliding down the pillow slightly so they were eye to eye, and cupped her face into a kiss, thumbs running under her eyes. “Ever. You know that.”

“Hmm. But-“

“No buts, babe. None.” Another kiss, before he pulled her into his chest and ran his fingers through her hair, feeling his chest tighten slightly as she suddenly clung on and nodded, her words muffled. _I know._ “Talk to me.”

“N-not much to s-say.”

“There must be something.”

“Bad dream.”

“You’ve not been to sleep.”

_Why do you know._ “Bad reality. No. Bad memory.”

_Bad reality._ “Bad reality…”

“I meant memory. I hate you and Alex fighting but reality is almost too much.”

“Too much…”

“Too much good.” She pulled away just far enough to get eye contact at that, emotion on her face evidently understood completely and immediately, before running her hand through his hair and leaving her hand cupping his cheek, forehead to forehead and both closing their eyes, voice lowering to a whisper again. “ _Unbelievable. That’s the problem._ ”

“ _What do you mean…_ ”

“ _I mean if my brain could understand how much I love you, there wouldn’t be room for bad memories. Sorry I’m a mess again, I thought I was done with this-_ ”

“ _Mila…_ ”

“ _Yeah?_ ”

“ _Don’t complain about me missing sleep, and come here._ ” He moved his hands down her back to move her on top of him, legs tangling them together and tongue finding hers, before turning them over and lacing the fingers of one hand together, other arm holding him over her and eyes searching hers. “ _Let’s make it sink in, then._ ”

*

He typed it again, thumb hovering over ‘send’, before deleting again and then sighing again, phone eventually discarded on the bedside cabinet. _How did this even happen._

Guille: Go to sleep. 

Alex: How did you know…

Guille: Guessed. You ok?

Alex: Better tonight thanks. Just wondering what to do.

Guille: Do?

Alex: it’s not going to go away, is it?

Guille: I don’t think it is.

Alex: I can’t deal with this much longer.

Guille: What do you mean?

Alex: They’re right down the hall. Marc and Mila are right down the hall. I can’t get away from any of them. And then a wedding.

Guille: Marc’s not done anything, come on. Neither has Mila.

Alex: I know they’ve not done much, but that’s a problem too. Feels like they’ve not even tried sometimes. And they’re so happy and I’m happy for Marc

Alex: But also I can’t look at it all the time. 

Guille: I understand. Having your heart broken hurts, especially when you can’t get away from it

Alex: Why is it only you that talks to me now. How am I the bad guy?

The younger Marquez looked up at the soft knock at the door, eventually padding over to it and opening it, and smiled sadly at his mechanic before letting him in and ending up sat side by side leaning on the headboard, conversation quiet and more comfortable silence than words. _You’re certainly not a bad guy._

“I’ve not been nice. But I didn’t cause this-“

“You didn’t.”

“I hate it.”

_Finally here we go._ “I know…”

“But I’m not sure what else I can do.”

“You want to know what I think?”

“Always.”

“I think Marc’s hurting because some of what you said is right. I think he’s worried about it, too, because he trusts your judgment. But he’s also completely in love with Mila, and vice versa. And he knows he’d do it all again because he knows how he feels.”

“But they-“

“Yeah, they did. And in that situation, the other guy was a dick. But I don’t think your brother gave a shit about the other guy or who he was, and I completely understand why.”

“You get it…”

“I do. Trust me when I say there’s absolutely nothing you can do about it once you feel it.”

“Hmm. Sounds like a good excuse to me.”

“It’s a great excuse. It’s also true.”

“So you think it’s real.”

“I think they’re both head over heels and I think the best thing to do in that situation is to just admit it and make yourself happy.”

“And the other guy?”

“Look at it like a race. It’s not about hurting the other guy, it’s about a result for yourself.”

“This is a bit different.”

“Maybe a bit. Not too much though. Stakes are higher.”

“And Tito and Lara?”

“I don’t know Tito like I know your brother.”

“I do. Almost.”

“And?”

“And I know he’s done what Marc would have done and I hate them both a bit for it, and I hate that.”

“If she loves him, really, you couldn’t make her happy.” _Ouch._

“Don’t feel like I was given chance.”

“You weren’t perfect.” _Progress, then. We finally have progress._

_Some honesty then, ok._ “Nope.”

“Is that the worst thing?”

“Nope.”

“What’s the worst thing?”

“They all just fucking disappeared like dominoes and there’s only _you._ Who has to go to the track tomorrow and set up, and all they have to do is talk for half an hour in an air conditioned room, and you’re still the one sat here giving a shit. And yeah I was mean and anything else, but two weeks ago I had two brothers and a girlfriend I couldn’t wait to see, and now I feel like I have one friend and n-no o-one el-“

The mechanic grabbed him into a hug before the tears could properly appear, pain at seeing him like it mixing in with massive floods of relief at the barriers finally coming down a bit, and gave him a squeeze as his shoulder started to get wet. _I know._

*

“Morning.” 

_Maybe you are telepathic after all._ The mechanic smiled at him before stepping slightly out of the way as Alex asked who it was behind him, then saw his brother and swallowed. _Come on, this isn’t you._

“Oh. Hi.”

“Hi. Can I, er…can I come in?”

“I’m going to head for breakfast. Ok?” He watched Alex nod and headed out, little expression exchanged with Marc on the way saying a lot, and then took a deep breath as he reached the lift. _Please._

*

“We, er…can we talk?”

“Yeah.”

“Ok.” The older brother walked over to the bed and took the space on the end of it to sit next to Alex, both staring ahead and able to see each other in the mirror, trying not to look. “You ok?”

“No.”

“Me neither.” Marc finally found himself with some eye contact and let it play out long enough to answer all the questions, arms going round his brother and pulling him in, relief washing over him as Alex clung on and sniffed slightly. _Me too._ “I miss you so much-“

“I’m sorry for what-“

“I’m sorry too, for-“

“I understand, I just-“

“No, I know. I know. I just-“

“I know. And I know this year has been hard-“

“That’s no excuse for being-“

“It’s not an excuse, it’s just true.”

“Big brothers shouldn’t need excuses.”

They exchanged half sentences for a while, not really needing to complete them, before both managing to get a bit of calm back and taking some deep breaths.

“Marc?”

“Hmm?”

“Is she ok?”

“She?”

“Mila.”

_Hi, Alex. I missed you so, so much._ “I don’t know.” That suddenly flipped the emotional wobble from once voice to the other, Alex’s fingertips the ones digging in, and Alex’s breath suddenly steadying. “But this isn’t about her-“

“It’s all about her.” He pulled away enough to make sure his brother took that the right way, emotional face saying yes, and grabbed him into another hug before clapping him on the back, voice low but loud in Marc’s ear. “I know it’s all about her and I’m jealous as hell because it was never all about Lara.”

“Don’t-“

“It’s not ok and it hurts and I’m so mad at Tito.” Deep breath. “But I miss you and everybody else I feel like I’ve not seen in a year-“

“I miss you too-“

“And I’m going to have to miss _her_ for a while.” Another breath. “But I guess that’s just the way it goes. I’m sorry. I’m really sorry I involved you and I’m sorry I abandoned you first.”

“No-“

“How much sleep did you get last-“

“I found a pregnancy test in the bin.” He blinked back at him, shocked himself how it suddenly just came out so matter-of-fact and trying to read Alex’s face, swallowing and taking another breath. “I, er…a positive-”

“Did she say anything-“

That makes his eyes well up again. “No.” Cough. "Nothing."


	55. Royals

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ♥
> 
> Thank you, enjoy?
> 
> More will be explained.. ;)

“Hey.”

“Hey.” She smiled, about to start getting out of bed as he closed the door behind himself, and then stopped as he held up his hand. “Everything ok?”

“I think we need to talk about some stuff.”

“Oh?”

“Don’t, babe.”

“Don’t…”

“Don’t pretend that you don’t know.” He swallowed, voice more serious than he’d expected and evidently more than she’d been expecting too, and then toed off his shoes and sat back on the bed, hand finding hers and letting their fingers tangle together for a second, eyes settling briefly on the ring. “There’s something we need to talk about, yeah?”

“Is there?” She frowned as he took his hand back, panic suddenly surging slightly, before relaxing as he didn’t leave, instead lying down next to her and turning onto his side, eyes on hers. 

“Yeah, there is. Why are you lying?”

*

Alex: Can I talk to you?

Guille: Why are you texting me..

Alex: Because people already think I’m crazy without dragging you off for a private chat

Alex: Meet me at the hotel at 8?

Guille: I think they’ll understand if you need sooner?

Alex: No, I’m ok. Thanks. 8 is fine

Guille: I’ll come to your room?

Alex: Thanks. 

“You’re alright though?” The mechanic paused on his way past out the box, Alex jumping slightly as he hadn’t realised he was there, and then smiled at the mischievous grin despite it all, him one of the only people capable of making that happen whatever the situation. _Just you and Marc._

“Hmm. Talk later, yeah?”

“Ok.” The older man watched him go, brow furrowed with concern, and then went back in, shrugging and trying to be patient. _Can’t be that bad if it can wait._

*

“Lying…”

“Lying. Why are you lying to me.” He nodded slightly, emotion between them suddenly turned up all the way, and cupped her cheek for a second before raising his eyebrows sadly. “I’m sure you’ve never done it before so I don’t know why you started now.” He watched her expression go from the genuine puzzlement of the first few seconds since he’d walked back in to the sudden flash of realisation that he might _know_ , although well hidden, and nodded again before taking a deep breath, voice surprisingly shaky. “Baby I found it in the rubbish. In the bathroom. Why are you lying.”

*

“Hey.”

“Hi.” The younger brother opened the door, letting Guille past, and then shut it again before sighing.

 _Ok so not back to normal yet then._ “Ok?”

“Hmm. Thanks for coming.”

“No problem. Anytime, you know that. What’s up?”

“Nothing much.” Alex flopped back down to sitting on the end of the bed and then nodded at the mini bar. “Beer?”

 _Ah so one of those ‘nothing much’s where you need a while to tell me. Ok._ “Please.”

“It’s not great to be honest.”

“But it’s beer…”

“Oh, it’s definitely beer.” Alex grinned at him briefly as he passed him the can, before sitting back down where he’d been before, when he’d been waiting for the older man to show up, and leaning back on the headboard, smiling to himself slightly as Guille did the same. “Was beer yesterday, and the day before-“

“You know everyone’s a bit worried about you?”

“Hmm.” _I’m a bit worried about me._ “Sorry.”

“Don’t have to apologise. You want to talk again? More?”

“Hmm.”

“Ok.”

*

 _Oh, shit._ That made it suddenly go from ‘maybe’, to ‘meltdown’, his concerned and slightly hurt expression changing from that into something a bit more desperate as she suddenly burst into tears, or at least, tears suddenly trickled down towards the pillow and she shut her eyes. _Oh God, it’s true. And oh God, it doesn’t make you happy._ “T-talk to me, Mila.”

“D-don’t know w-what to s-“

“Why didn’t you tell m-“

“I still don’t know if it’s t-true-“

“But we can find out together-“

“I’m t-terrified and if I said it out loud-“

He nodded at that, cutting her off with a kiss, before pulling her in and leaning his forehead against hers, eyes closed, breath ragged and other hand finding its way onto her stomach, that making them both take in a sharp breath. She nodded against him, suddenly feeling the same thing as he seemed to and helping haul him messily on top of her, fingers fumbling with his jeans and cheeks still wet on both of them.

“I don’t know what to do-“

“We.”

“But I-“

“Mila.” He stopped, lips still grazing hers as he spoke, and managed to get back the eye contact, both sets of eyes terrified but somehow electric. “ _We._ ”

“D-don’t-“

“We.” Another kiss. “Always we.”

*

“So something interesting happened.”

 _Here we go._ It had been an hour, almost. _Please don’t be terrible._ “Oh?”

“Hmm.”

“Had a really weird dream.”

 _You’ve got to be kidding me._ “Right…”

“And it’s kind of fucked things up.”

“Right? What was it?”

“I need a hug.”

“What?” He smiled at that, sudden and said more like Alex was 19 months than years old, and then shuffled over to wrap his arm round his shoulder, realising the way he’d suddenly blurted it probably meant he didn’t want to quantify all that much, and waited.

“I just want to do this.” Alex suddenly moved, putting his head on the older man’s chest and wrapping his arm half round him, breath held with the lack of reaction, and then closed his eyes to dare to explain, breath short. “But…I had a weird dream. About you.”

_WHAT?!_

*

“Hey.” 

“Hmm…”

“You need to go-“

“Not for a bit.” He shook his head, chest still churning and everything too much to really think in or think about, and snuggled down a bit further, pulling the sheet around them and opening his eyes to find hers already open and waiting. _Wow. Still now. Months later. Every time._ “Don’t tell me what to do.” He grinned as best he could at that, nipping her lip and feeling a bit more warmth come back as she managed half a smile in return, and then moved his fingers gently through her hair again, that always a way to calm her down, and felt himself manage the same as her fingers curled round his forearm to hold him there. “You want to come to the track?”

“Hmm. Maybe?”

“Ok…”

“Maybe yes.”

“Ok.” _And what are we talking about now._ “And then later-“

“Maybe.”

 _I feel like that’s as far as I’m going to get right now._ “Ok.”

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

“I love you for not pushing.”

“Oh well that’s a mistake…” He smiled again, lacing their fingers together and kissing the back of her hand, and then pressed another kiss to her lips. “I always push…”

*

“About me?”

“Hmm.”

“Ok.” The older man tried to keep his breathing steady, aware Alex’s ear was on his chest and could probably hear every _bang bang bang_ that he really didn’t want him to, before something just snapped as the younger rider hugged himself in tighter and sniffed slightly, reason for the hug suddenly apparent. _Ok._ “Don’t panic, mate. Whatever it is.”

*

“Where’ve you been-“

“I’ll explain later.”

“Marc, you can’t-“

“Emilio? _I will explain later._ ” He squeezed Mila's hand as they walked in, apologetic enough but not enough to not make it necessary, and then wound his hand round her waist and squeezed, leading her across the table and feeling the nerves around her, more like an aura. _They think I'm crazy, I guess._ "You want coffee or Diet Coke?"

"Diet Coke please."

"Ok." He sat her down at the table, kiss in her hair, and brought it back, opened it, grinned and winked as she gave him the _why are you doing everything for me_ expression, before taking the seat next to her and squeezing her knee, no one else able to see that one. "Are you ok?"

"Better than I expected." She nodded, Marc distractedly scrolling through his emails next to her, and then laced their fingers together under the table, the expression on his face when she said it making it even more true. "We..."


	56. "But"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait, and worried about the silence...let me know?! ♥

"Alex, just tell me." He felt the younger rider tense again and squeezed him slightly. "Nothing will get better if you don't.."

_True enough._ "Ok. I dreamt you liked me." _What am I saying._ "As in, you were gay...and you liked me, you know...more than as a friend. And it freaked me out a bit because then I started questioning everything but then you're the only one who's here and I can't drive myself crazy-"

"Ok, stop."

"Right..." Heart hammering and aware he hadn't had any of it denied, he tried to relax and take a deep breath. _Answer the question I've not asked._ "I just..."

"Yes."

"Yes?"

"Yes." _Too late now._ "Yes, I feel like that about you. But I don't want it to ruin-"

"Ok."

"Because I know you don't feel it in return, so I didn't want to say-"

"I don't."

The confirmation hit him in the chest, although he'd been expecting it for almost two years, and he let the silence sit there for a few seconds until Alex's voice whispered low into his ear." _You're so so important to me but I need you to know it's never-_ "

"I know, and it's ok-"

"I understand if you need to get some distance-"

"I'm used to it." He gave him another squeeze and swallowed it down, again. "Just don't worry about it." _That's my job._

*

_So I'm pregnant. Probably._ She watched him answer another question, grin radiant, and then felt the shiver of fear ricochet through her again. _I guess then step one is to confirm, before we panic, or lie, or make any decisions._ That word, decisions, went through her brain as Marc's eyes found hers through the TV, sending another tremor of nerves through her. _Have a baby, yes. A baby now, though?_

*

"Hey."

"Hey." Guille walked past the older man, hoping he'd get left alone, and then groaned internally slightly as Santi followed him and sat opposite him. _Read the room, come on._

"How is he?"

_Perfect, just like before._ "He's ok."

"And you? Holding him up, it seems."

"Hmm something like that. I'm trying." The Estrella Galicia mechanic downed half the whiskey he'd ordered and sat back in his chair slightly. "It's awkward. I mean, I understand both sides. And it should get better a bit now because they've talked at least."

"Alex and Tito?"

"No. I've no idea what will happen there. Alex and Marc, seems like they're back as close as before."

"Ok. Well that's good I guess."

"Yup." _Don't make it obvious._

"Can I ask you a question?"

_As long as it's nothing to do with THIS._ "Yeah?"

"What do you think of Mila?"

"Mila? Why?"

"Just...I don't know. Marc loves her, that's obvious enough. And she seemed like the greatest influence ever since he met her. Until all this shit happened with Antonio and since then-"

"That's not her fault."

"I'm not saying it is, believe me. They just seem..."

"Seem?"

"They just seem like they're unhappy. Or, something's changed?"

"How much do you know?"

"All of it, I think."

"Ok. And how happy would you be?"

"With the person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with, on the verge of marriage, I think I'd be ok."

"I think they are ok."

"She looks almost ill."

"Ohh." It suddenly sunk in why he was asking, and Guille felt the defensiveness drop a bit. _Why did I even start to think you'd be asking for bad reasons._ "Hmm. I know what you mean. I think there's maybe more we don't know about. But I also think she'd BE ill if it wasn't for Marc."

"You don't think it's suddenly sinking in what it means? To marry Marc Marquez? Or anyone?"

"I think you'd have to kill one of them to split them up. I also think it's all a lot to get used to, regardless of whether it's positive attention or negative. And I think they've not had much choice about how everything's happened and they're trying to make the best of it."

"You don't think she's worried she made a mistake?"

"I think she's worried Marc thinks he's made a mistake."

"And do you think she's right?"

"No." He shook his head and stared down into the glass for a second. "What they have, that kind of...connection? It will never, ever go away."

"I hope not."

"I know not."

"You have that?"

"Um...no. Me and my girlfriend...I love her. But we're not quite like that. I don't think everyone has to be, either." _Because some people find the right person and it can never happen._ "You?"

"Not quite. More, you know...traditional..."

"Traditional."

"I love my wife. But if I forget to call her one day, I'm ok and she's ok. I guess it's just different."

"Yeah." _"Different"._

*

"Hey." He smiled into the brief kiss, safely behind closed doors in Repsol Honda hospitality, and gave her a brief squeeze. "Ok?"

"Yes."

"Ok. You want food here or hotel?"

"Room service?"

"Ok. That's good for me."

"And we should probably talk."

"Ok..."

"I did another test." She whispered that into his ear, no one close enough to overhear, and squeezed his hand as he took a deep breath. "We definitely need to talk about it."

*

Alex: I think we should meet and talk but not with her

Tito: Ok. That's all I want to do, just tell me when and where

Alex: Come to my room when you can? We can't sort it out but Marc's getting married soon and we're going to have to see each other and I don't want to ruin it

Tito: I think we can sort it out

Alex: To be frank I don't want to sort it out right now, I just want a ceasefire for my brother and my brother's friend

Tito: Just let me explain

Alex: I'm not talking about it in texts and I'm not forgiving you so if you show up please have something else to say other than 'but we can sort it out' because I'm not interested in being your friend. Ok?

Tito: Ok, see you later

*

"Do you want it." He ran his finger down her chest and circled her belly button, now both naked in bed with him propped up on his elbow; her looking to him more like she was glowing than just lit up under the lamp. "Hmm..?"

"We already said we would. One day, right?"

"Yeah. Well, I did and you seemed ok with it..." He smiled again, just about managing eye contact, before letting himself look preoccupied again and tracing his fingers over her stomach. "I want to know what you think, _amor._ Let me back in."

"Hmm."

"Mila, like I said before...it's we. I know saying things out loud makes them seem more real but it's already real. I know you love me and you want these things with me, and I know the fear is about _now_ , not about that. So just be honest." He left that a few seconds, able to read her well enough by now to know it had sunk in despite the silence, and then laced their fingers together as she started to talk, everything suddenly set free.

"Ok. To be honest I'm not really doing so well at looking after myself right now. I feel like you hold us together and you shouldn't have to. I feel like the situation is all wrong for a baby to come into the world when people write so much shit and think I'm trying to trap you. I feel like your son or daughter shouldn't have to put up with anything less than perfection because you deserve that too. And I feel like everything right now, with us and your brother and MotoGP and everything...it's too much. And yes it would be next year before he or she is here, but that's still so soon. And we'll have a business. And we have Antonio suing us."

"Ok." _Honesty._

"Mainly though you know what scares me the most?"

"What."

"Two things. One, being left alone if something happens to you. That scares me enough just for me. I can't even deal with my own life on my own right now-"

"I know." _Shit._ "I mean, I know my career is a problem-"

"It's not a problem, it's who you are. It just needs taking into account."

_And they wonder why I care._ "Ok. And the second?"

"I was never a fragile person before, but right now I guess I need to just admit I am. I know I'm pathetic sometimes, but I also know I'm trying. And I know how hard. And I know you know how hard. And I'm terrified that this would, you know..."

"No, I don't." He waited long enough for her to continue and then kissed her on the cheek. _Come on, keep going._

"I'm terrified it would tip the scales again and I'll end up another post-natal depression statistic and have another mountain to climb, and you'll have to pull me up again and again and again, and our first kid will have a dad who has a dangerous, exotic job where he travels lots and I'll be sat at home in Andorra lying to everyone that I'm fine and losing everything and I won't love it-"

He cut her off with a kiss at that, finally understanding all the intricacies and level of terror she seemed to be dealing with, and then pulled her in so they were eye to eye, about to start trying to respond before she beat him to it.

"But."

_But._ "But?"

"That's the scared stuff."

"Ok." _So there is other stuff._ "But..."

"But, I can't imagine getting rid of it and I can't get the idea of it out of my head."

*

_Open the door, and don't hit him. Step 1._ He made it over, checked in the peep hole it was Tito, and then took a last deep breath and opened it. 

"Hi."

_Hi._ "Hi. Come in." 

"Thanks." The older rider walked past him into the room and stopped in the middle, awkward, as Alex closed the door behind him and turned round, trying to stay calm. "Where do we start?"

"Where do you want to start."

"I want to say sorry-"

"Too late for that. I want to talk about wedding ground rules."

"Right. But please-"

"No." The younger Marquez crossed his arms and shook his head, taking another deep breath. "I said why we were here-"

"Ok."

"So..."

"So..."

"So first, you don't talk to me and try and pretend, ok? You don't put me in a position where I have to play nice with you because there's someone else there or a camera or whatever."

"Right..."

"You don't keep trying to apologise or any of that bullshit, you accept that we're not friends anymore and that it's your fault and this is how it is now."

"I don't want-"

"I don't care."

"Right..."

"And obviously I know she will be there and you will be there and I can't avoid it completely. But you realise that it fucking hurts and that I don't want it shoving down my throat. AND, you tell her this stuff too. I don't want you trying to apologise and bullshit me, either of you."

"Ok."

"And I'm the one with the rings, and going to do my best. I'm going to make my speech first and I'm going to make sure Marc and Mila have an amazing day. And you're not going to mention this to anyone and you're not going to talk about it on the day or in your speech. You're not going to mention her in your speech. You're going to sit on our table but a few seats away from me. And Marc is going to notice we don't talk and see we're not friends but nothing else. Nothing is going to ruin it."

"Fine by me."

"Good."

"That's it, then? Just a load of rules?"

"You think I should be the one trying to repair it?"

"I think you've done more public damage than me."

"Maybe public. Is that what matters then? I'll tweet something if that will make you feel better-"

"It's not about that, it's everything-"

"That's all I'm willing to do. If you want anything in the box, ask Guille. If you need anything about the wedding, get her to ask Mila or ask Marc or my dad."

"Right, fine."

"And you don't train at Rufea anymore if I'm there. Or l'albi or Ponts or anywhere else. It's me and my brother, or you and my brother. I'm done with you."

"Fine."

*

Alex: Where are you?

Guille: Breakfast. No one else here except me, Marc C and Hasi

Alex: Ok, Thanks. On the way

Guille: You talk to him?

Alex: I sorted out ground rules for the wedding, but I don't want to 'talk' to him

Guille: Ok. Are we ok?

Alex: No, I hate you now I know you love me :P

Guile: Funny :P

_Bad wording._

Alex: Sorry. In a lot of ways. But also yes we'll always be ok. I'm not very good at life without you.

_Fucking hell, you didn't deny it._

Guille: You are, mate. You are.

Alex: Yes I've done very well with losing my girlfriend and PR recently

Guille: Yeah, you have. No one has to be perfect

"Good." He clapped his mechanic on the shoulder, smiling at the other two, and then slid into the seat next to him. "Right, well..."

"Well."

"How hot is it?"

"Basically like walking into hellfire."

"Urgh."

_Hi Alex. I think we have you back, at least a bit._

*

_But._ They'd left it after that, both feeling the words needed longer to sink in and thoughts needed time to form properly, and Marc felt her breath on his cheek and dug his fingernails into her hips to guide her down, hair cascading over one shoulder and both feeling their eyes roll back slightly as her hands moved his and fingers wound together, hands pushed into the pillow each side of his head as she started to move and her lips met his again. _But, I know. I keep stopping at the same point._ He trapped her legs by tangling them with his own, hands pulling themselves free to move his arms around her and hold her there as he rolled his hips, and let his fingernails dig into her back again as she nibbled his lip, everything slow and perfectly timed and another one of those unforgettable nights that he tried hard to get out of his mind when he was in public. She sat up again, guiding them back together and him sitting up to face her, wrapping her up as they stayed still for a few seconds, content to just feel the connection for a while and let the kiss say everything they needed to, before she gently pushed him back down again and they got to that point where something seemed to snap, nipping his lip and meeting him halfway as his hips moved, low moans hitting the ceiling in perfect time until he moved one hand between them to tease, matching the rhythm and hearing the change in noise as she got more desperate, eventually giving into the need and both clawing at each other through the last few seconds before she shuddered and groaned into his mouth, muscles contracting around him and sending him over the edge with another couple of thrusts, stuck together and her face buried in his neck as they came down from it. _But._

"Shower...?" He pressed his lips against her ear to whisper and shivered slightly at the whimper as he pulled out, before nodding as she did and pulling her into another kiss as they got another few seconds of eye contact, underwriting everything. _I know._ "Hold on."

"I'm never going to be likely to let go..."

He smiled at that, managing to get them out the bed and pressing a kiss into the crook of her neck as she curled around him and let him carry her to the bathroom, before putting her down and turning on the water, standing behind her in the mirror and wrapping her up from behind, eyes locked together. "Oops..." He pressed a kiss against a mark on her neck and smiled wickedly as she did, and then held out his left hand to feel the temperature of the shower before pulling her under the water, hair flattened and grin back as she pushed him against the tiles and dumped a handful of shampoo on his head. 

"Keep your eyes closed, it's not baby shampoo."

Another grin, before she laughed at his response and he whacked his hand down on her ass. "Fuck off."


	57. Sure

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you and ♥ and let me know...? Don't like something, comment and I will always think about anything!
> 
> And very important warning in advance: we're not at the end of the story or the angst... ♥

**Sepang, Saturday Night**

“We have something to tell you.”

He watched his mum’s hand suddenly grip his dad’s and took a deep breath, feeling his do the same with Mila’s.

“Yeah…”

*

**Sepang, Sunday night**

“Thank youuuuuuu…” Marc grinned again, nodding at the way OTT applause but enjoying it nonetheless, and whacked a kiss on Mila’s cheek as he stood to make a speech. “Ok so…as everyone knows it’s been a year with quite a lot of ups and downs…on track and off. And there’s a few people here who weren’t before, and a few people I wish were here. But the most important thing I want to say to everyone is just thank you…for your hard work and all the amazing stuff you do. It’s amazing riding a Repsol Honda and it’s amazing winning the title with you again, but you know I can’t do my part if you don’t do yours. And I hope you know that I love you all so much for everything you do.” He grinned and blushed slightly at the rowdy, bloke-ish reactions and then nodded and took another breath. “And my family, too…thanks so much for everything. Especially this year, when I know it’s been much harder work being related to me.”

“It was hard work before-“

“YES, I KNOW.” Marc grinned at the comment from his brother, sending him a fake glare, before turning the other way to look down at Mila, eyes locked together straight away. “And this other thing happened this year too…”

“We know!”

“We’re eating, I don’t want to be sick-“

“Shut up.” Marc grinned as she did, comments thrown around from a good proportion of the table, and then shrugged slightly and raised his glass in her direction. “Don’t know what to say to you, _amor._ You already yell at me for talking too much when you’re trying to sleep.” 

She grinned at that, having been true a bit after the decision they’d made and Marc having launched into a tipsy essay on love and life and everything in between, before shrugging back and taking a sip of water. _Dare you to try, and in public._

_Challenge accepted._ “Ok, well…everyone knows how we met and where we met and who is to blame…” He pointed at Santi and grinned at the little cheer. “Everyone knows we’re going to get married and I guess that says a lot…” _Calm, come on._ “Maybe not everyone knows that I was terrified after that crash in Japan and that you got me through that. Or not everyone knows that I felt so alone and terrified of anyone trying to use me, and you call me up and talk me through an evening walking down the Rambla. And refuse to let me pay for your train ticket to come and see me. Not everyone knows that you made my house feel like my home and that I just feel like I know what I’m doing now, when I’m not on the bike. No one knows how brave you are, either. But I do. And now maybe they do. And I’m sorry they still write shit about us and I’m sorry I say all this stuff in public that makes you go red…but I love you, baby. So much.” He smiled as she stood up at that, deciding to kiss him quiet instead of wait for more soppiness, and there was another cheer as she pulled him in and then pressed her lips to his ear to whisper. 

“Love you too. Please don’t say the other thing.”

“I won’t.” Another little kiss. “That’s for us.”

*

**Sepang, Sunday afternoon**

_You actually did it._ She felt herself half crushed as Roser pulled her into a hug, Marc just over the line, and then let herself get carried away on it and over to parc fermé, soon after Marc somehow in front of her again so quickly, celebrating with the team and then bounding over, eyes shining in his helmet, and pulling it off before capturing her in a kiss and then climbing over the barrier to twirl her around, words going in his ear making it start to sink in. _World champion. WORLD CHAMPION._

_“And Marquez is congratulated by his team in Parc Fermé, and now is sharing the joy with fiancé Mila. A great early wedding present for the both of them. And it’s great to see Alex and Tito in the same place, both there to congratulate him…”_

*

**Sepang, Saturday night but earlier**

“Can I talk to you for a second?”

_I so know that tone of voice._ He turned round, in the restaurant talking to Santi, and then raised his eyebrows as it seemed to be exactly what he’d thought. _Oh no. I mean, please don't damage me too much._ “Sure, babe. Where?”

“In the room. Just a few minutes.” She smiled an apology at Santi and laced their fingers together, nothing else said until the door of the lift was closed and she had him pinned against the wall. “It’s really important…”

“Seems like it.” He grinned and ran his hand down her back, surprised by the sudden reappearance of the slightly crazy dancer who’d stolen his heart what seemed like years ago, these last few weeks having seemed more like they’d been gentle forever, and then groaned as her hand palmed him again, doors just pinging open on their floor as she let him go and then dragged him out and down the hall. The door got opened quickly, room crossed quickly and covered in clothes that were at best rumpled and at worst ripped off. “I hate it.”

“Shut up and fuck me.”

“Romance. Wow-“

“Don’t even try it-“

*

**Sepang, Saturday night but later**

“I can’t believe it. I told you. Didn’t I? I told you.”

“I know.”

“Marc. A father. Our baby, with a baby. So soon. I can’t imagine it. Well, I can. But in the future. You know?”

“I know.”

“And it wasn’t planned but they’ve decided to do it? Do you think we should talk to them? Do you think it’s a good idea?”

“I don’t know.”

“What if it’s twins?”

“I don’t know!”

“I just…” She finally sat down again next to her husband and let out a long swirl of smoke, both melting in the outdoor smoking area. “I just don’t know how I feel about it. I feel happy. So happy for him. Both of them.”

“And then so so worried.”

“So worried.”

*

**Sepang, Saturday night very slightly ealier**

Marc: Come over quick, good reasons

Marc: You may need the mini bar

Alex: Right ok… ?!

“Hi.”

“Hi…” The younger brother walked in, frowning slightly but in a good way, and sat where directed opposite the two nervously excited bundles sat on the end of the bed. “You ok?”

“Yeah. Need an opinion and also to tell you something.”

“Right…” He smiled back at Mila, even after apologies still feeling a bit guilty and glad she was the one talking, and then frowned at Marc again briefly. “So?”

“So…”

“Get ready.”

“We think you’re going to be an uncle.” She watched him freeze, joy and terror both fixed on his face, before he bit his lip and looked back at Marc. _Awwww._

“Seriously-“

“We don’t know how or when to tell mum and dad-“

“Oh my God.” He grabbed Marc into a hug, lip wobbling and trying to be manly and failing, and then moved his left arm out to grab Mila into the hug as well, trying to take in deep breaths. _Oh my GOD._ “You’re not kidding-“

“No we’re not kidding and it’s terrifying but are you happy-“

“Yes I’m happy if you’re happy! I don’t know what to say I can’t believe-“

“I know-”

“FUUCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKK-“

*

**Sepang, Sunday night**

“So then…we need to like, give it a room and stuff…and wash it sometimes. And get small clothes.”

_It’s really not fair that you’re allowed to drink but I guess you did win a title._ “Yup..” She grinned as he hiccupped, trying to guide him down the hall, and managed to just about get him in the room.

“Can we paint it red.”

“Yes. The room yeah, not the baby-“ That got cut off by a massive giggle that ended in Marc in a heap on the bed, turning over with as much elegance as possible to hold her there, hands moving under the fabric of her top and captivated by the idea again.

“It’s amazing.”

“It is.”

“I’m so scared but I’m so excited. You know? And I can’t believe you want me.”

“Don’t be stupid, baby.” She kissed the end of his nose and then laced their fingers together, feeling the slow slide to emotional drunk start to happen in front of her. “I love you.” _Don’t cry. I will cry._

“You’re going to marry me.”

“Yup.”

“And we’re having a baby.”

“Looks that way…”

“And I won the title.”

“Yup.”

“I don’t know what else to say.” He smiled again at that, room suddenly quiet somehow, and bit his lip as he swallowed and sniffed, trying to make the tears stay where they were. “I don’t know what else to say but I didn’t know people could be this happy.”

_Awww._ “Awwww, don’t.”

“But you know….”

“I _know._ ”

“But you promise and it’s not pressure or anything-“

“It’s been a tough year, you know.” She pushed him slightly further onto the bed and then climbed on his lap, ending up face to face and forehead to forehead. “But don’t doubt for a second how I feel about you, ok?”

“Ok.”

“And please, please…” She ran her fingers through his hair and smiled to herself as he closed his eyes and leant into it. “Please never wonder if I’m happy. Things bring me down, and I’m shit at dealing with some things, but seriously…” She made eye contact again there and nodded at him. “Underneath everything else, I’ve never felt anything like this.”

“But really-“

“Baby, don’t second guess me when you’re drunk.”

“Not drunk.”

“And again…” She smiled at that, him doing the same, and then relaxed into a hug and pressed her lips to his ear. “I love you. Can’t wait to marry you. And congratulations, World Champion.”

“Thank you.”

“And congratulations, again…”

He dug his fingers in a bit more again, suddenly feeling it sink in again, and nodded. “Thank _you_.”

_You’re actually so sure. How are you so sure when you could have a model a minute and not even know who I am._ “No…wrong again…” _I guess just because you’re you._ “Can I ask you something?”

“Anything.”

“Why me?”

“Ok, no, you can’t ask me that.” He let himself relax back into the bed, pulling her down with him, and shook his head with a grin, voice mostly working and not too drunk. “Only ssssssensible questions.”

“Oh, sorry.”

“Forgiven.”

“Ok, no…” She giggled as he did, attempts to get her top off and undo her bra having failed massively, and did it for him before getting pulled back in and ending up side by side. “You’re such a dick.”

Another giggle. “I knowwwwww. Now plleeassseeeeee-”

“Oh, baby. I’ll do _anything_ you want if you don’t think you’re too drunk to try.”

“Pfffffffff-“


	58. Both

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Everyone gets the cheesy but absolutely-my-wedding-song-bae song? :D ;) ♥
> 
> Flashbacks are in italics. If you spot the Ocean's 11 quote I will marry you :D
> 
> Thank you and I hope you like it, and please let me know ♥
> 
> Fluff warning... ;)

"Hey. Nervous?"

"Terrified."

"Oh, come on. It can't be that bad, it's Marc-"

"I know. But I have to stand there in front of everyone-"

"You do, and you're a fucking pole dancer. Get a grip." Lara smiled at her, locking eyes in the mirror before letting her eyes wander down the dress and everything else, and then squeezed her slightly from the side. "You look incredible and so will he."

*

"And you've got the rings."

"Yes."

"And you-"

"Everything is ready and nothing is going to go wrong. Promise." Alex smiled at him, locking eyes in the mirror before letting his eyes wander down the suit and everything else, and then squeezed him from the side. "You look like someone she's going to marry."

"Weird isn't it."

He let himself smirk a bit. "What you mean how you're suddenly not a kid?"

"Something like that. And having a kid."

"And having a kid. And I'm sorry if I've acted like one recently sometimes-"

"It's ok. And no, not really. I get it. And I"m really impressed how nothing has felt like there's a war on."

"We talked about it and we sorted it. Well, I gave him ground rules and he's following them. Today is about you."

*

_"I can't find the dog."_

_"She has a name, babe..."_

_"I can't find our little Princess Xuxa..."_

_"Maybe you should try coming to bed and she'll turn up..."_

_"So you have her in there...hmm?"_

_"Come and see..." He smiled to himself as her footsteps got closer, picking up Xuxa and angling her at the door, both pouting in Mila's direction in perfect sync, and then grinned as Mila appeared and a long _awwwww!!!!_ preceded her joining them on the bed, stealing the puppy and snuggling into Marc before plonking the bundle of fur between them and sighing contentedly._

_"Ok yeah definitely bed time."_

*

_Wow._ The beach was pretty dark, chairs and everything set up and lit up enough but main light coming from the flickering candles lining the 'aisle', and it looked exactly how they'd talked about when they'd somehow imagined and planned everything they wanted one night at 2am, too excited and wired to sleep and laughing about the reputation of wedding planning stress. _Just wow._ He took a deep breath, feeling the nerves suddenly somehow disappear, and then started the walk through the crowd to the front, content to wait and get his breath taken away by the one thing he'd not seen. 

*

_"Ok seriously...I know it's cheesy but I love it-"_

_"Hmm that's how I feel about you." She grinned as she looked up and found him smiling and huffing slightly at her, and then moved the paperwork off the bed in front of her and onto the floor, patting the mattress. "Ok so maybe I do kind of love it. It's just I bet so many people will use it-"_

_"Yeah, I know and I get it. But..." He sat down in front of her and pulled her into a kiss. "Everyone else might not know what it means..."_

_"Smooth."_

_"Always." Another grin. "So music decided?"_

_"Ok, first dance yes. Happy?"_

_"Yup. I like winning..."_

*

"Ok. Ready?"

"Ready. And less nervous, and so excited."

"I can see the difference." She double checked her friend over again, hair and make up and dress perfect, and then finally opened the door and smiled as Roser threw her cigarette down outside and beamed at them.

"Oh, wow."

"I know." Lara smiled at her, glad the older woman didn't seem interested in the politics of her and Alex and Tito, and nodded. "Even the crazy fan girls have to admit he's the lucky one, right?"

Roser grinned at that, smiling at Mila and holding out her hands to take hers, giving them a squeeze and locking their gazes. "I've thought that since the first time we saw you, which you don't know about, when you were asleep on the sofa in Cervera before the tour and we came back earlier than we thought. And we could hear you in the kitchen, me and Julia, and we heard Marc wake you up and carry you upstairs, and I think we just knew. And I never thought anyone would make me feel this relaxed about handing him over." She winked conspiratorially and grinned again. "You ready to deal with the little nightmare forever? And make a new one?"

_Somehow I completely am._ "Yes." _Or certainly half of that._

*

_"Miss you. I can say that, right?"_

_"Yes, you can say that. And I can reply. I miss you too and can't wait to see you."_

_"Promise you'll warn me if it's a dream..."_

_"Maybe. But I won't wake you up."_

*

_And I'm not allowed to look._ He heard the music start, and everyone stand, and the murmur of _wow_ go round as she obviously appeared. He managed to not look, Alex grinning at him and communicating enough to make him even more frustrated, and then finally found himself stood next to her and able to see. _Oh wow._ He felt his breath catch, everything perfect and perfectly simple, hair in loose curls and left loose, make up making her eyes even more hypnotic than normal, and dress white and floor length, pulled in at the waist and sleeveless, feet bare and just enough tropical beach wedding cliche for neither of them to forget where they were.

"Stop staring." She said that under her breath with a smile, looking forward and Marc grinning at it and finding her hand briefly, before daring a glance and feeling her heart leap in the same little loop the loop. _Surely being this happy should be illegal._

*

_"How long have you been up?" She sat down next to him on the balcony, leaning down on his shoulder, and smiled with closed eyes as his fingers laced through hers._

_"I've not been to sleep yet."_

_"Oh..."_

_"It's just...not bad stuff. My head is full. I always wanted this, yeah? I don't know, too many people didn't believe me or whatever, but I've always wanted this. You. One person, the right other person, I think just...I don't know. I don't get how people can say that being married or committed would be bad. I don't get how people would rather fuck strangers because it's 'freedom' instead of have this. And I don't get how the HELL I'm going to manage to raise a child half as well as my mum and dad-"_

_"Ok, shh. One thing at a time, ok?" She squeezed his hand before burrowing down under his arm slightly as it wrapped around her, both leaning back against the hotel wall and light starting to show on the horizon. "First thing, I don't think other people have the sex life we have." She smiled as he blushed slightly and then turned and flashed his eyes with that touch of devastatingly evil mischief. "Yeah, exactly. I mean...we've tried most things, I'm sure we'll try more...you actually give a shit about whether I'm enjoying it, which makes a BIG difference...we like similar stuff. And I think loving the person you're with - properly - just makes stupid one night stands seem less worth it. Plus we fuck each other like we're in a bar storeroom sometimes anyway..."_

_"Jeje. True."_

_"Some people get married because they're living by a timetable, I think. A timetable that sometimes then ends up at divorce o'clock, way too often. People don't talk to each other, or get to know each other properly...which sounds stupid but I don't mean, you know...what your favourite song is or whatever, I mean thinking about things properly. Understanding why you do what you do. Understanding why something has annoyed me. Giving you the benefit of the doubt if you say something that comes out wrong. Genuinely accepting that no one is perfect. I don't know, babe. I just know you're my favourite person to spend time with, you're my favourite person to make love to, my favourite person to fuck, and my favourite person to talk to. You're my best friend and now I guess we're onto the second part, where you have to take on even more super hero roles...and you'll be the best at that, too. We'll be terrified together and we'll doubt and cry and panic together, but we'll tell each other the second that happens. Every time. Until we're watching him or her get on a bike for the first time and still telling each other everything we're feeling and why, then school and first race or whatever the future holds...I'm terrified of the responsibility too, but I'm really really sure that you're going to make me love you even more, and going to be incredible."_

_He stayed quiet for a second and then sniffed, trying to keep his voice steady. "You've been practicing that speech haven't you?"_

_"A little bit. Did I rush it? I felt like I rushed it."_

_"No it was good, I loved it. And sometimes...rushing is a good thing, right?"_

_"Right." She smiled at that, tone lighter on purpose because he was a bit too overwhelmed, and then moved round to sit on his lap and stare down at him, before pressing a kiss on his lips and running her thumbs under his eyes, voice quiet. "I mean every word."_

_"I know you do. You're magic."_

_"Says you? I thought you were smarter than that."_

_"Hmm. Not at this time of the morning panicking about how we teach him or her Catalan and Spanish without getting political-"_

_"Right, Marquez. Paso a paso, now back to bed and take a deep breath."_

*

"I now pronounce you man and wife. You may kiss the bride."

That, sudden somehow even though they'd been reciting the words and exchanging the rings with shaky hands for what felt like eternity, made them both pause again, eyes meeting and saying so much more than the things they'd promised that were supposed to have covered everything, before Marc felt reality rush back up to meet him and felt his chest explode as it suddenly sunk in; bowled over and speechless but luckily that socially acceptable. They met in the middle, arms going round her waist and lips finding hers, both distantly aware of the noise from everyone as they kissed, and then everything seeming to fade out as it sunk in and left just the two of them on the beach in the dark, breathing each other in. _My wife, Mila. The mother of my children and the rest of my entire life just teasing me with the possibilities._ He didn't remember quite how they made it from there to the dance floor for the first dance a bit later, but he remembered the conversation and the decision about the song; the tiredness she'd smiled through and paperwork she'd shoved off the bed, the instant relaxation that seem to flow through her the second he sat down with her and smiled at her; the first time he'd heard it when they'd been too far apart and she'd been the only thing the song was about, in his mind; the reality of the music video featuring the professional dancer and the guy who wasn't great, mirroring what this felt like and making him smile to himself as they started to move; the night they'd been missing each other and he'd texted every single line of it to her in a cheesy drunken haze; the taste of lemon sorbet on her tongue when he'd remembered that night and brought some back home and they'd had to fight for the bed and eventually locked Xuxa in the bathroom for some peace; and then somehow, finally, the only thing in his mind as he leant his forehead on hers and closed his eyes was the look on his mum and dad's faces when they'd walked back in and found them curled up on the sofa in Cervera before any of the craziest things had happened, and the tiny shiver of terror he'd felt at how obvious it obviously was to them, and how it all seemed too good to be true. _And now here we are, and I'm scared of a lot of things, but none of them are alone._

"I love you." He almost murmured that against her lips, feeling her fingertips dig in ever so slightly in agreement, and then went for another, proper kiss, no better way of trying to say everything else and the day designed for exactly that reason. "Both."


	59. Convince Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Life has been insane. I have terrible wifi but will try and reply sometime soon, and hope everyone is good and you enjoy it...please let me know and as always, THANK YOU!

"Morning."

"Morning." She smiled across the pillow before opening her eyes; feeling his finger trace her cheek and snuggling down slightly before blinking into reality and feeling her breath catch and the sight of him. "Husband."

He grinned at that, somehow shy and overwhelmed and incredibly arrogant about it at the same time, before capturing her into a kiss and relaxing into it as she did, little tugs on his hair getting the message across until his body was covering hers and her wrists were pinned to the pillows on either side of her head. "We've not lost the spark then..."

"Never." She pushed her hips up to force them together and smiled into his mouth as a low groan vibrated through them, head pushing back into the pillow as his mouth latched onto her neck. _And to think I once walked away from you on a rainy street to get home to him._

*

"No."

"Ok..."

"You know I don't like milk in my coffee-"

"Yeah and I thought you knew I would want to make sure-"

"Why would you make sure-"

"Because who knows if today-"

"You know that not today. Never, everyday no milk-"

"Ok seriously I was trying to be nice-"

"Yeah I know but put that energy into something better instead of-"

"Pff shall I just take the breakfast-"

"NO."

"Ok. Fine." He huffed slightly, swallowing down the irritation, before looking sideways at her and starting to grin as she did.

"Sorry I panicked, I saw you pouring-"

"I was hovering-"

"Yeah you're always fucking hovering lately-"

"Lately?!"

"Yeah, like at the wedding-"

"So...yesterday."

"Shut up." She fake glared and stuffed a piece of toast at his face before giggling as his eyes widened and he had to grab it with his hand. "Sorry it was just hard-"

"I know. Same."

"I know. Just explaining."

"I know."

"Good."

"Not so sure why I'm wearing pyjamas right now though-"

"Yeah me neither." He grinned again, carefully moving the breakfast tray out the way, before pulling her on top of him and then feeling the moment change slightly as they ended up forehead to forehead. _Just ask. Everything should be based on honesty._

"So you know." She rubbed their noses together slightly and then smiled when he opened his eyes. "It's not hard because I don't love you more th..." _I was going to say anyone. Wow._ "I..." She faltered and watched the little reactions in his eyes as he caught up with what had just happened, before closing her eyes and nodding as she buried her face in his neck. "It's not hard because I don't love you more than anyone. It's hard because looking at him you can see the hurt, and I care about him. And I can see the part of me I don't like every time-"

"I know." The words were whispered low into her ear before his hand moved down her back and then squeezed. "Well, the last half. The first half? I love you, too."

"I know."

"Here we go again-"

That made her smile into the skin of his neck and nod again, before pushing herself back up into a kiss and just hanging onto him for a while. _Here I go again, but not on my own._

*

"More photographers..."

"Urgh just ignore them-"

"No, I don't mind." She grinned across at him, eyebrows going up, before getting the right response and getting up to walk over to the pool, hips moving perfectly side to side as she walked down the steps and then slipped under the water and smoothed her hair down as she popped back up in time for a grinning face to pop up in front of her, pulling her in and moving them over to the side as their legs tangled under the water.

"I like the show but I wish-"

"Marc, I really don't care." Another grin as she cut him off with a proper kiss, genuinely no holding back at all despite the audience, and then settled into the hug after a while, weightless in the water and eyes closed to enjoy the sun until she half accidentally murmured it out loud. "Have you thought about names, baby?"

"Baby names."

"Yeah..."

"Um...yeah?"

She smiled at that, pressing a kiss into his kiss before pulling back enough to get eye contact and raising an eyebrow. "I get the feeling you've written a book-"

"Nah." Grin. "Only like, 3 chapters tops-"

*

"Hi." She stopped, him obviously having been waiting there and unsure as to whether he should knock and her decision to leave the room having given him no choice. "Are you...I mean-"

"Was actually looking for Tito."

"Oh."

"I mean...sorry. How are you? Ok?"

"Yeah." _It's not even him and it's enough to make it awkward._ "You?"

"Yeah not bad thanks. Just, er...Marc wanted to talk to Tito...I mean, mechanic Marc. And he didn't answer."

"Ah, ok. Yeah he's in the bar. Want to follow me down?"

"Ok."

"Ok." Lara smiled, leading Guille down to the lift, and then let out a long breath once the doors closed and the quiet descended. "Look you know I never meant to hurt him and I care and always will-"

"I know."

"Oh. You do?"

"I do. I get it. I mean, I get his reaction too. You know, he's maybe my best friend so I will always be there for him-"

_Aww._ "I know. God, I know. I'm just glad you don't hate me."

"I don't hate you and neither does he. He loved you. And when you mean that, even a little bit, it doesn't change into hate. It can't."

"Even after-"

"He's only so upset because he can't hate you. He's just upset how it turned out."

"So am I."

"You must have known though-"

"I had no idea at all otherwise I never would have opened up to him and got us so close."

"I think it was actually good for him."

"Good for him?" Now out the lift and in the lobby, they both looked round to check for prying ears before heading over to the bar. 

"You can't get it right first time, I don't think. And before you say anything about Marc and Mila, they've said it before to other people."

"So had I."

"He never had. And maybe he didn't quite mean it like you guys do, but saying it and believing it is a big thing. And it hurts now, but he'll bounce back."

"You really think it an turn out ok."

"You know what the only thing to ruin it would be, in my opinion?"

"What?"

"You and Tito not working out. Because then it would seem like it happened for nothing rather than everything."

*

"No. Literally please God give me a name that isn't a footballer-"

"Some of them are coincidental-"

"Sure. Still though..."

"Well pff." He fake glared and threw the ragged bit of paper at her over the other side of the bed, back in the hotel room with the double doors to the sea open and light streaming in, a bit of privacy needed for the conversation. "Well what are your ideas?"

"Ok fair enough I like Leo-"

"With an E though, yeah."

"Yeah. What about girls?"

"Wait did we just decide?!"

"Well...yeah can do for me-"

"Ooh!!" He grinned and rolled over into a quick kiss before looking down at her stomach, her on her back, and then ended up lying on his stomach, eyes fixated on her and mind whirring through how crazy it all seemed. "Ok so boy, Leo."

"Yeah. And girl? Because I feel like it might be a girl."

"Really?" His eyes lit up at that and shot up to find hers again, fingers lacing through hers. 

"Ok I thought you'd want a boy..."

"I will love them equally either way. Whichever is first..." Cheeky grin. "But honestly I'm kind of well-practiced on the princess talk now after Xuxa..."

"Jajaja, I know what you mean."

"Ok good because I felt a bit pathetic-"

"YOU?!" Another grin, before she turned onto her side and moved over to lie next to him, face to face. "Ok so girls-"

The knock on the door cut her off, both of them looking up and Marc automatically replying first. "Who is it?"

_"It's me."_

"Come in..." He gave Mila a look before trying to look thrilled about it as Pol opened the door. "Hey."

"Hi. Sorry to interrupt..."

"No worries. What's up?"

"Um...kind of need to talk to your wife." He grinned at Marc a bit red faced before smiling as Mila beckoned him over and started to shove Marc over the bed, to much protestation.

"Hey-"

"You get me forever, you can afford to give him 5 minutes."

"Pfff-"

"Marc..."

"Ok." The tone did it, smiling self-consciously at the way Pol chuckled at how easy it had been, before leaning into a kiss and then nodding at Pol on the way outside towards the pool, a yell followed by a splash echoing back to them a couple of minutes later and definitely Alex's laugh accompanying it. _Jejejeje._

"What's up?"

"I've told her I'll reply but tomorrow but I need to talk about Carlota. Please."

_Ah._ "Ok." She nodded and sat up properly, him sitting down on the other side of the bed, and then motioned into thin air. "Hit me with it. Convince me."

"Convince you?"

"That's why you're here, right? Because you think I'll be more of a cynic."

_Dammit you know me too well._ "Ok she says she misses me..."

*

_Bastard._ He came up spluttering, Alex laughing still audible underwater, and then glared at his brother before managing to pull him under and winning the small fight, doing a lap of victory in celebration before finding a beer in his hand and taking a deep breath. _See. I'm still me, we're still us, and the past is still the same connection to the future when he'll be dunking my baby girl in the water as cool Uncle Alex. Amazing._

"Any ideas for girl names?"


	60. Oh My Fucking God // Alexia

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is it...
> 
> I'm sorry for a lot of stuff on this like delays, maybe quality dropping off sometimes...sorry there was not much warning that it's over. For a lot of reasons, the original arc I had planned ended up too painful and not worth it. Happiness is a necessity in Moto-land right now.
> 
> Thank you for reading, as always, and comments and kudos. It means the world and it's catapulted me into having so much more confidence in what I write.
> 
> So thank you all and I hope you enjoy the last chapter, and I hope it says goodbye to this in the right way. <3

_Oh God._ She took another deep breath, terrified this was it, and then lunged for the phone, Xuxa giving an annoyed little humph at being dislodged from her perch. _Sorry baby but actual baby._

She listened to it go to voicemail and Marc not answer, before trying the second best way to get in contact with her husband and feeling the panic rise as that rang and rang. But then, Alex answered.

"Hi it's me. Is Marc there?"

_"Hey. No he's doing a summit today on the bike with Jose Luis. Can I help?"_

"Where are you?"

_"Just on the way back. Is something wrong?"_

"I think the baby is coming and I'm freaking out and I don't know what to do-"

 _Oh my fucking God._ He let that sink in for a minute before forcing more words out. "Ok where are you supposed to have it?"

"Barcelona."

_"Right. I'm coming back now. We'll keep calling Marc and hope he gets signal soon and we'll set off for the hospital. Ok?" How do I sound so calm._

"O-ok-"

_"Take a deep breath. We'll be fine and he'll be there soon. Ok?"_

"O-ok. Alex-"

_"I need to go to get back to you. Deep breath. I'll be quick."_

"Ok." _Oh God oh my God-_

*

"Mila???"

"Here."

He rounded the corner at full speed, Lycra already half pulled off and forehead covered in a sheen of sweat, before stopping and making the eye contact, a million things said. _Calm._ "Ok let me change and then we'll go. In the Honda, then Marc can bring the BMW. Ok?"

"Did you speak to-"

"No. But he'll be back in range soon I'm sure and he'll come as quickly as he can."

"But I don't think-" Her voice started to crack at that point before Alex knelt in front of her and grabbed both her hands, pulling her in to press a kiss on her forehead. 

"You can do anything. I'm here, and Marc will be here soon. My mum and dad are coming to meet us at the hospital, and everything is going to be fine."

"I'm so, so scared." She stared at him through those words before he gulped and nodded, squeezing her hands again and taking a deep breath. 

"I know. I also know you, and I know you won't let fear beat you. Ok?"

*

Mila: baby is coming

Lara: WHAT!!!!

Mila: On the way to Barcelona. Contractions are very far apart. Terrified

Lara: God we'll meet you there! Don't be scared, it's not crazy early!! You're going to do amazing

Mila: Tito?

Lara: Yeah!

Mila: I'm with Alex

Lara: Don't worry about us, just concentrate on Marc

Mila: Marc isn't here. It's just me and Alex

Lara: What!!!

Mila: He's not answering, up a mountain cycling

Lara: Ok here's what's going to happen: you're going to forget about everyone else except you right now, and you're not going to worry, and everyone will come and be there soon. Right now you have good company too

Mila: I know, he's amazing

Lara: He is. So deep breaths and ignore our shit storm. This is about you and ...got a name yet?

Mila: Not sure yet

Lara: Ok well think about that and a beautiful daughter on the way! That's what's going to happen, and that's what you need to focus on!

Lara: We're in the car now, where are you?

Mila: A2, just past Lleida

Mila: He's doing 170

Lara: Much traffic?

Mila: No, it's safe I think

Lara: Then deep breaths

*

"I'm driving fast but safe I think. Ok?"

"Yes."

"Good."

"Any answer-"

"My mum says not yet. He'll be here soon."

"I can't do this-"

"You can. But you won't have to." The younger brother covered her hand with his and squeezed. "He'll be here."

*

 _Oh my God._ He looked through the list of calls that had started making his phone ping once they were back with signal and felt his chest start to explode. Mila Mila Mila Alex Alex Mila Mum Mum Dad Alex Mila Lara Lara. "Something's happened."

"What?" The motocross rider looked up at frowned slightly before watching the panic and pulling out his own phone. _Oh God._

"She's not answering." Marc choked back the panic before dialling Alex instead, listening to that ring and ring, before his phone lit up with an incoming call from his mum and he scrabbled to accept. "What's happened-"

_"You're having a baby daughter. In a good few hours, so no need to panic. Me and your dad are on the way to the hospital to meet them."_

"What! Now? I mean...who...Wh...h...is...who is she-"

_"Your brother is driving her down to Barcelona. Get your head straight, pack some things for you and her, and drive down as soon as you can. But be careful. Ok?"_

The calm, measured instructions bit back the panic enough to allow him to calm down and sign off, before he turned to his friend and felt his knees start to shake. "She...I mean, we...the baby is coming. Right now. The baby is coming-"

 _Oh my fucking God._ "Ok." _Calm._ "So we pack some stuff, we get in the car-"

"We're going to be too late-"

"No, we're not." Jose Luis shook him slightly before getting back on his bike and pointing at the house. "Come on, I'll race you."

*

Everything seemed like a blur. Cars, traffic lights, the border which was the only thing that made him slow down, the trees and the road and everyone else on it. It was pure focus, the kind he only usually got on a bike, with his vision trained only on the objective and everything else completely ignored until they were on the motorway and his foot pushed even further against the accelerator. 

"Fuck."

That woke him up slightly, enough to see the blue flashing lights behind, before he smacked the steering wheel and swore as he started to slow and pull over in a cloud of rubber. _Please please wait for me, please-_

"Do you know how f..." The officer trailed off as he saw who it was sat behind the wheel, half excited and half weary of the speech already not being much use. "Marc Marquez."

"My wife is in labour."

"Excuse me?"

"My wife is in labour in Barcelona and I'm sorry I was going too fast-"

"Do you know how fast you were going?"

"N-no." 

"216 km/h."

 _Fuck. Ok-_ "I'm sorry-"

"Your wife is in labour."

"Yes."

"Ok. I don't care who you are, going that fast is dangerous. I can't-"

"I know, I know. I'm sorry-"

"We'll slow it down to 180 on the motorway with me in front, and then follow me once we get to the city. I will call ahead and open the toll booths. Ok?"

 _Jesus thank you God-_ "O-ok-"

"Ok, good. GO."

*

He'd been on complete autopilot, hand white as Mila had been grabbing onto it, before they were there and she was ok and being taken care of, and Marc was on the way, and he knew there were more people ready and waiting outside to take over. He left it a few minutes, letting the relief sink in at having been able to handle it and get her there and calm her down, before pressing a kiss to the back of her hand and getting to his feet. "I'm going to switch with Lara and see if my mum and dad are here yet."

"Ok." _Somehow I am._ "I'm sorry if I crushed your hand-"

"I think overall, I have more to be sorry for. And I'm glad I got to show you how much you mean to me. And my niece. So don't even try it." The younger Marquez leaned in and pressed a kiss on her forehead before ruffling her hair slightly. "Deep breaths. If you need me, call me. Even if it's in twenty seconds."

"O-ok." Cough. _What to say._ "Alex?"

"Hmm?"

"You've been my guardian angel today and I love you to death."

*

"Hey."

"Hey." She swallowed hard, reading his face for what else to say, before he smiled slightly and nodded behind him to the door. "Your turn. I'm going to get a coffee."

"O-ok-"

"Just you though, if that's alright. I think she's self conscious."

"That's fine with me. But-"

"Ok. I'll see you in a bit." He smiled again slightly, took a deep breath, and then walked past her and over to where Tito was sat waiting, trying to look inconspicuous. The older rider looked up, worried, before feeling his eyes widen in happiness at what Alex actually said. 

"What?"

"I said, do you want to go and get a coffee and leave them to it for a bit?" He stared down, watching all the tiny parts of the reaction go through the older man, before taking a small step back to give Tito space to get up, standing side by side for a few tenths of awkwardness before they both turned round to nod their temporary goodbyes at Lara, the face staring back unreadably complex.

"Ok I said coffee." Alex took a deep breath as he felt the stress suddenly starting to leave. "I meant beer. That was insane."

Tito smiled at him, watching the little changes in mannerisms that seemed to have occurred in the younger man, and then took a deep breath.

"Alex-"

"I don't want to talk about it. I just want to have a beer with my friend, talk about all the stuff we're going to do with my niece, and pray my brother turns up before his daughter is born. Ok?"

"I..."

"Literally." The Moto3 World Champion turned to look at him again, finding his nerves calmed just by finding this even better than he'd hoped, and levelled his eyes at Tito. "I mean it. Not in a harsh way, but I'm done with it." And then hesitated slightly before feeling arms go round him and pull him into a hug, a moment of emotion suddenly hitting them both before it cooled off into manly pats on the backs, they straightened their shirts, and paid for the beer. 

"So do you know what they're going to call her-"

"No idea! You? I bet Lara has the inside girl hotline, right?"

"I don't think she does. Well, she does, but I don't think they actually know."

"I bet he'll want something ridiculously normal like Maria, and Mila will want to call it like...Nephertiti."

Tito laughed at that, a bit and then a lot, before giggling again as it sunk in for them both and Alex tried to control the mouthful of beer he'd already sipped.

"Oh GOD-"

*

"Hello. Yes, she has a visitor at the moment. Everything is going perfectly fine, and we've had... A lot of calls from your son about the situation-"

"Ok. Good." Roser smiled and took a deep breath. "I guess you mean Marc. And Alex is in there with her?"

"Alex went to get a drink. I think it's a friend in there at the moment."

"Lara. Blonde?"

"Yes, sounds right."

"And Alex went for a drink?"

"By all accounts he needed one."

"I can imagine." The older woman chuckled before looking at her husband and then checking directions for the restaurant. Then rounding the corner and stopping, amazed and unbelieving, before turning to Julia to check it was real.

"I don't believe it-"

*

The police car screamed in first, parking just past the door, before Marc smelted to a halt behind him and leapt out, yelling back into the vehicle about parking and keys and everything else, then sprinting up the stairs and up to the desk, catching his breath as he leaned and tried to garble out why he was there and who he was. Either successful by way of the receptionist already having been warned or by actually having made sense, he was directed right and along and right again and took off running down to the door, stopping outside with his hand on the handle as it all started to sink in. _Baby. We're having a baby._ Then he took one last deep breath, tried to look calmer, and walked in.

"Made it."

He stared at her for a few seconds, watching the change in her and calm take over, eyes welling up for both, before nodding pleasantries at Lara and waiting for them to be alone, walking over to the bed and taking the chair.

"You picked a great day to-"

"Don't." He grinned at her, tears pricking at his eyes as the panic started to fade and she was here, and ok, and he was in time, and then laid his head down next to her and felt her fingers brush through his hair. _Made it._

They stayed like that for a few seconds, both calming down, before he sat back up and laced their fingers together, pulling her hand up to press a kiss against the back of it and then leaning into a proper kiss, forehead to forehead for a few seconds before the world stopped spinning.

"We need a name."

"We have a name."

"We do?"

"Well...we had a middle name. I think we should upgrade it to first name, after today."

"Where is he-"

"Sat with your mum and dad and Lara and Tito."

"And it's-"

"It's fine, they hugged, and he's already the best uncle in the world."

Marc let that sink in, about to say something else, before his hand got caught in the vice of a woman in now quite serious labour and she yelled at him to press the button because 'it was happening'.

"Do you want me here-"

"DON'T FUCKING GO ANYWHERE. OK?"

*

 _I wonder if it's true that I look radiant right now, or if it's only for the one person who shares this with me._ By the look on Marc's face, staring down in the same wonder as her, she was at least radiant to the person who mattered. _We made a whole person._

"Marc."

"Hmm."

She leant in closer to press her lips against his ear, about to say a known fact but wanting it to be private, and then closed her eyes and smiled as his lips found her ear to reply.

_Love you too._

*

_You have a lot of god parents. Was it difficult to choose?_

MM: I think everyone brings something different. Alex was obvious, then Tito and Lara. And then when you start thinking about the role they're going to play, we could only think of Santi and Dani.

_Some people would find it strange to have a rival play such a role in your daughter's life._

MM: Well Dani isn't the hands on guy. Nappies would be weird! We get on really well of course and everyone knows he has been a big influence for me. Dani is there for the respect I have for him. It's difficult to explain but I think there are some things only riders understand. And sometimes I'm too close to make sense of them. So if I get hurt or if anything bad happens to me, there's one voice I want them to listen to, Mila and Alexia.

_And that's Dani Pedrosa._

MM: Exactly! There's no bullshit with Dani. He gets it all: the passion, the risks and the stakes. We're not best friends, but that's not the criteria in this case. So I think we made a great choice. And Santi, too, because she's going to need help to analyse all that data once she gets on the track!

_You're going to bring her up to ride?_

MM: We're going to bring her up with my passion. Our passion. So if it becomes hers too, we'll do everything to help her follow it. If not, I'm sure I can try something else.

_Something else?_

MM: I don't mean I'll retire. I mean my priorities will change. Again, because they already have.

_So you're a changed man?_

MM: I think of it more as being a whole man. There's no me anymore, just we. And I've never felt anything like this. People seem to think you get more boring as you grow up and you have a family and this stuff...It's not more boring. It's more focused and more real. Less time for anything else. It's the anything else that looks cooler on YouTube, sure, but I don't have time for jet skiing right now. When we're more settled I'm sure I'll have my moments again...

_Any plans?_

MM: My wife is on a fitness kick since Alexia was born, and she needed a goal. So looks like we might be doing something fun.

_Something?_

MM: If you can keep a secret, we're thinking Everest. Nobody else did that yet, right?

_No other riders have, no._

MM: Well then that sounds like a plan. I like being first.

_New daughter, new title and now Mount Everest..._

MM: I don't understand why you're grinning at me like that! That's completely normal!


End file.
